ZEN: Now THAT'S Funny.

[TheKenwyne]

ZEN: Art of Wrestling has been flying under the radar for 3 years now, and has earned itself a cult following in it's native New Zealand, and the love of many fans of 'indie' wrestling the world over. It's high flying, family friendly, gimmick rife style has influences from Lucha Libre, to Sports Entertainment and - whisper it- the smutty comedy of old school Babes of Sin City. But we, here at Prowrestlingworld.com have recently discovered that through mutual consent between the booker and the owner, Cyanide has given up the book. In an official press release, ZEN stated that they had relieved Cyanide of his job "so he could become more focused on increasing his role as a wrestler." There have been rumours that some of the company's staff are bitter that Cyanide, who is known to be a friend of owner and main event title holder Halloween Knight, has consitently booked his buddy as a main attraction when they feel they should be given a shot at the big time. It is assumed that the ZEN management will look for a third party name with no prior alignment in the locker room to correct this problem.

***

I awoke with a start. And immedieatly wished I hadn't. My brain hurt like a particularly large ballon elephant had exploded near it. Which it had, the night before, but in reality, that wasn't the reason I was in pain. No, I'd blame that on the copious amount of alchol I downed at the post show party. I clambered out of bed, and staggered to the bathroom. I grabbed a beaker, complete with toothbrush, and filled it with water. As I raised it to my mouth to drink, I caught the toothbrush squarely in the eye. Ow. Swearing, I attempted to tip the toothbrush out, only to forget the cup was still full of water. Cue one wet motel bathroom floor, and another burst of angry swears. By this point I was really regretting drinking quite so much the night before.

Not that it had been a bad night. No, it had been a relatively good one. I was on holiday, taking a break from the grind of wrestling on 3 different indy shows stateside. I'd saved enough money to take a trip abroard with a few buddies. We'd originally decided on visiting Sydney, but had been warded off by a few horror stories involving holes in the ozone layer, and so we'd ended up in New Zealand. That's not a bad place to end up. The country is breathtakingly beautiful, and one of my nerdier friends frequenty declares that he's seen our current locale in some film called King of the Bling. We'd immersed ourselves in the culture of the place, going to a concert featuring 'New Zealand's 3rd Most Popular Folk Parody Duo', which was good fun, but being wretlers and wrestling fans, we'd perhaps not suprisingly chosen to drop in on a local show when we heard it was on.

We were in the country for Christmas, which, for the unitiated among you, is very warm in the Southern Hemisphere. Unfortunately, prior to out visit, we were among you unitiated muppets, and so had backed for an arctic winter, using the reasoning that 'it's quite close to Antartica, it must be cold'. It isn't. But unfortunately we didn't have the money to buy ourselves a new wardrobe, so we decided simply to traipse around in greatcoats, thermals, mittens and cossack hats. This was how we were dressed as we mingled at ZEN Way of the Theif 2009, earning our small group many strange looks as we squeezed into the small arena to observe, what we agreed afterwards, was a work of genius.

With our minds suitably blown, we went to a nearby bar, to discuss the show and why we hadn't heard of it, and why no-one had never tried anything like this before, we found ourselves in a conversation with the man who owned the promotion. Not that we noticed him, since he worked under a mask, but he did here us noisily discussing the show, and indeed my declaration that it was the sort of show I'd love to work on.
"You're a wrestler?" he asked, from the bar, where he was gripping a pint.
"Yeah!" I said, jubiliant, the alcohol already taking effect. "In the USA I'm Jack Avatar, the All American Boy,"
"And he's pretty good, too!" added one of my equally beer-fuelled friends.
"Indeed, mate?" inquired my mystery inquisitor, who came and joined us at a table. "Can I buy you a drink?"

So he liquered me up a little more. I didn't learn his true identity until later. He'd sent the rest of the group away with the challenge of hitting on the long suffering bar maid, after my nerdy buddy boasted he could pull J-Ro without too much effort. I laughed drunkenly, struggling to stay on my stool as he tried his best to act smooth, but only succeeded in changing colour to something approaching beetroot.
"Your friend's really something with the sheilas," chuckled my new friend, who still appeared remarkably sober for all the rounds of drink's he'd ordered.
"You should see him when he's not off his face," I guffawed, barely in control of myself.
"So, you said you're a wrestler?" asked the other, suddenly serious.
"Yeah? What of it?" I replied, trying hard to matching his straight face, only to collapse back into fits of laughter.
"Well, my friend, I'm in need of a wrestler. A wrestler who can book shows too. Name's Frankie Bendis, I'm the owner of ZEN." I stared at him blankly. "You know, that promotion you went to see earlier." Still blank. "Screw it."

Frankie went on to explain his proposition to me. To my drunken mind, the fantasy of becoming a head booker at just 24 and running away to New Zealand to leave the monotony of the US indy scene was just too tempting. I accepted. I remembered that I had a new job shortly after spilling water down my front the morning afterwards. This merited another burst of swears.

***

OOC: Yeah, this is my first ever wrasslin' diary, because it's the first time I've played TEW and my brains just popped with ideas for what to do with a promotion. Roster lowdown, backstage shenanigans and first card prediction sheet coming up in the next post.

[TheKenwyne]

ZEN Roster Overview

Main Event
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/AmericanNightmare.jpg
American Nightmare
Me. I couldn't not use me. The talent pool on this roster is shallower than the most backwater US indie fed. Only main event because somehow I'm very popular over here. Beats me how. What exactly did I get up to while I was drinking?
Plans: Carry other people until they get better.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/HalloweenKnight.jpg
Halloween Knight(ZEN Master Champion
The best wrestler on the roster and also the man who managed to hire me, Halloween Knight is the top Heel in the company, and gets good heat of his fans. Currently embroiled in fued with Lone Shark, who wants to destroy his stable, F.E.A.R., and get hold of his title.
Plans: Stay in and around the title scene, cut lots of promos, keep show ratings up. And fued with Lone Shark, a fued on which this promotion has been built.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/LoneShark.jpg
Lone Shark
The 'Big Fish in the ZEN pool', Sharky is a former ZEN Master holder and top babyface, because I don't want to have to wrestle loads as well as book loads. Good flyer with solid basics and performance skills.
Plans: Keep fueding with Halloween Knight, stay in title scene.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Necromancer.jpg
Necromancer
Apparently lords of evil wear bunny ears. What? What do you think those pointy things look like? Not as talented as the other main eventers, but relatively over, he'll get a fair amount of screen time. Currently fueding with Devilfish, who took his title (though the 'Fish has since lost it.) A part of F.E.A.R.
Plans: Finish his fued, sharpish. Then? Well, that'd be telling.

Upper Midcard
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Cyanide.jpg
Cyanide
Another member of F.E.A.R., Cyanide is the man I've stolen the book off. He's a bit bitter. Unlike most of the roster, Cyanide is a technical work with some nice chain wrestling and mat work, but he dosen't have the high flying skills that many of my other wrestlers own. Could prove a problem, since their aren't many I can match him up against with the same sort of skills.
Plans: Get up some momentum, get to main event. Lone Shark would be a nice foil, or, failing that, me.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Devilfish.jpg
Devilfish
Back to the high flying norm, Devilfish is currently scrapping with Necromancer, a rivalry that started when Devilfish nabbed the ZEN Master title last year. Though neither have the title now, this is still good fun. His character's fun, and he's very, very small. A fan favourite therefore, with a great look.
Plans: Finish his fued with Necromancer.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Jester.jpg
Jester
Despite a character name that suggests a funny character, Jester plays a crazed psycho instead. He brings a neat mix of Hardcore and High Flying skills to the table, and is good at drawing heat. A mainstay of the tag division with Eraser.
Plans: Tag Fued? Not sure, really.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg
X-Calibre
A laid back guy, Calibre is popular with the fans here. One of the best flyers on the roster, he could be a guy who has the ability to crack the main event in the future. Occasional tag wrestler with Man O'War.
Plans: You'll see...

Midcard
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/CWA.jpg
C-W-A
My favourite character. Tee, hee. How can you not love a character who hunts his enemies to assault them with custard pies? Even if he isn't well known or talented, I like him. Hee, hee. C-W-A stands for Clown With Attitude. Ha.
Plans: Hee, hee.... haha...

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Eraser.jpg
Eraser
Jester's tag team partner who is known as a gun for hire and general hard nut. Not talented, might survive if he can make somthing of his tag team with Jester.
Plans: Tag Work, mainly.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/JimmyStratosphere.jpg
Jimmy Stratosphere
The only worker who I share, Stratosphere also works for APW in Australia. I brought him in for his stellar high flying and solid basics. Could be a big star.
Plans: Midcard grind until he gets a decent name.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ManOWar.jpg
Man O'War
AVAST! It's a salty sea dog! Man O'War's gimmick is officially that of a Comic Book Hero, but he acts like a nice pirate, with nautical catchphrases a-plenty. Tags occasionally with X-Calibre, and is very entertaining by ZEN standards.
Plans: Midcard grind, promos.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Massacre.jpg
Massacre
The closest we have to a monster heel, Massacre is the final member of F.E.A.R.. Decent brawler with a good look, Midcard mediocrity would be certain were it not for his allies higher up the card.
Plans: Help F.E.A.R. members. On his own? Not much.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Shaolin.jpg
Shaolin (ZEN Conceptual Champion)
Shaolin is very well rounded with no major strengths or weaknesses. Holds the title, for some reason best known to the bookers. If he can develop his game he is a potential Main Eventer.
Plans: Title fued. Ninja antics.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/SuperZero.jpg
Super Zero (ZEN Harmony Champion (Tag))
One half of the Tag Team champions, dating and managed by Molly Cuddle, our Face Manager. Decent flying and technical work, with good basics. Could be a star.
Plans: Tag Team Work, for now.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Vertigo.jpg
Vertigo (ZEN Harmony Champion (Tag))
The other half of the Tag champs. A near clone of his partner, but with better entertainment and worse techinal work. C-W-A's main target for custard pies. He, he.
Plans: Tag Team Work.

Lower Midcard
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MiltonHittlespitz.jpg
Milton Hittlespitz
Another worker I've brought it, 'Koala Cuddlin' Chair Lovin'' Hittlespitz is a fine all around worker who we have high hopes for. For now, though, he'll just have to job until the crowd get to know him.
Plan: Job, occasional win against another lower carder.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MirrorUniverseJonGordon.jpg
Mirror Universe Jon Gordon
Another very zany gimmick, getting sucked through to a paralell universe is possibly the best excuse for a heel turn, ever. No momentum, and not well known, Jon's going to have to grind to get up the card, though he is a good all rounder.
Plans: See Milton.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/QuickSilver.jpg
Quick Silver
One of the lesser lights of the roster, he has very poor basics, but is reasonably entertaining and a decent high flyer. He'll need to work hard on the rest of his game before he gets any higher up the card.
Plans: Job.

Opener
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/NightmareStalker.jpghttp://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/NightmareSlasher.jpg
Nightmare Slasher and Nightmare Stalker
A couple of identical prospects. Stalker is by far the more talented, but they have a good wadge of experience as a team, so I'll keep them both around for a while. Slasher will need to work hard to keep his place here.
Plans: Tag jobbing.

Non Competitor
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ClassyPaulMassey.jpg
Classy Paul Massey (Road Agent)
A vet of the Australasian indy scene and a good road agent, Massey is a maninstay of the backstage crew, who's advice is always listened too.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/GuruVishni.jpg
Guru Vishni (Manager)
"The High Priest of Enlightenment, Tranquility and Low Blows" only has one protege at the moment, but that is the wonderfully named Mirror Universe John Gordon, who he created by sending the real John Gordon through a portal. Good manager with nice colour skills to back it up.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MollyCuddle.jpg
Molly Cuddle (Manager)
More valet than manager, mainly here to provide a foil for Vishni to work against. Cheap, though, and she's dating Super Zero, so she keeps him occupied backstage.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/SparkySparks.jpg
Sparky Sparks (Announcer)
An average announcer, Sparks is nevertheless a great guy to have around backstage, partly because he's very friendly, and partly because he makes some mean donuts.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/StevenYale.jpg
Steven Yale (Referee)
Yale's not a great referee, but he works a blind man gimmick, meaning that his matches are almost always without a screwy finish, unless heels do something so devious they actually physically touch the ref.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/TheAlexArturroEx.jpg
The Alex Arturro Experience
Former Stand Up Comedian Alex is a good colour commentator and another guy who really adds to the backstage atmosphere.

*Note: I fired The Anarchist and Bile for being crap, and hired Jimmy Stratosphere and Milton Hittlesptiz to replace them.

Tag Teams:
DevilShark (Devilfish and Lone Shark, D-, Occasional)
The Dark Knights (Halloween Knight and Necromancer, E+, Occasional)
The Enemy (Cyanide and Massacre, E-, Regular)
The Horror Show (Nightmare Slasher and Nightmare Stalker, D-, Regular)
The Mercs (Jester and Eraser, E, Regular)
The Shadows (Shaolin and Quick Silver, E, Occasional)
The Sky Kings (Vertigo and Super Zero, E-, Regular) (ZEN Harmony Champions)
X-War (X-Calibre and Man O'War, E, Occasional)

Stables:
F.E.A.R. (Four Extreme Agents for the Revolution): (Cyanide, Halloween Night, Massacre, Necromancer.

The backstage atmosphere at ZEN is great. The rules are lenient (as long as you don't smoke or jab yourself with needles, you'll get along fine), and the lockeroom is full of friendly guys who can make jokes and take them. And Sparky Sparks' frankly delicious donuts. Anyway, Paul told me I had a show to book. I'd had to weeks to get to know the talent and the fans, and now I had to deliver. Nervous? That dosen't describe it. Anyway, here is the card for ZEN Way of the Dreamer 2010.

ZEN Way of the Dreamer 2010
American Nightmare vs. Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Milton Hittlespitz
C-W-A vs. Quick Silver
Shaolin vs. X-Calibre for the ZEN Conceptual Title
The Sky Kings vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony Title
Devilfish vs. Necromancer and Cyanide
Halloween Knight vs. Lone Shark for the ZEN Master Title

[Timber]

ZEN is the greatest thing since MAW. Gonna be alot of fun and i don't blame ya for the fires and hires.

ZEN Way of the Dreamer 2010
American Nightmare vs. Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Milton Hittlespitz
You need some wins to make the rest of the roster look good later.

C-W-A vs. Quick Silver
CWA is a crappy wrestler but a fun gimmick. It's worth pushing him for the pure entertainment of it.

Shaolin vs. X-Calibre for the ZEN Conceptual Title
Shaolin is just a nice all around guy. Keeping the belt on him and letting him help other Midcarders develop is a good idea.

The Sky Kings vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony Title
The Kings are just better and more popular.
Devilfish vs. Necromancer and Cyanide
Devilfish is solid and keeping him strong to finish his feud with Necro.

Halloween Knight vs. Lone Shark for the ZEN Master Title
It's Knights fed so he wins. He's not bad in the ring and with Lone shark he can put on a good match. Keep the feud going with some underhanded tactics.


Good luck. Once i get the full game i'm going to run a ZEN game for awhile. Gonna be fun.

[Jaded]

Dammit, I was hoping to get the first ZEN diary out.

Good luck with this, though - will be reading closely and trying not to (intentionally, at least!) steal any ideas.


Shifted my post down here cause it seemed in the way coming between your intro post and your roster post...

LOVED the roster intros, especially the American Nightmare - great stuff. :)

ZEN Way of the Dreamer 2010
American Nightmare vs. Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Milton Hittlespitz - You're more ZENnish than the other guys.
C-W-A vs. Quick Silver - CWA vs Vertigo NEEDS to be blown off, so get him warmed up here.
Shaolin vs. X-Calibre for the ZEN Conceptual Title - Both these guys are awesome, so I flipped a coin.
The Sky Kings vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony Title - Not keen on Mercs.
Devilfish vs. Necromancer and Cyanide - Strength in numbers
Halloween Knight vs. Lone Shark for the ZEN Master Title - Gotta go with the owner.

[TheKenwyne]

Timber: My thoughts exactly. This promotion is just great fun: the locker room is basically 88% without any help from my leadership or helpful rules. And to add to this I just like writing scenes involving baloon animals, custard pies and some of the most atrocious nicknames in the history of Pro Wrestling.

Jaded: Thanks for the post move, and it'll be fun to see the directions our respective diaries take. Glad you enjoyed the roster intros, I enjoyed writing them. I like poking fun.

Show will be up late tonight/early tomorrow.

[TheKenwyne]

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ZEN.jpg
Zen: Way of the Dreamer 2010
Held at the ZEN Temple in front of 48 people

Before I get on with the show I have 1 pre show incident to relate to you lucky readers. All the workers arrived on time without cigarettes, drugs, or anything else that would have been frowned on by Mr Zendis, and were getting changed when a voice that sounded remarkably like Frankie began admitting to having an affinity for Australians. If you catch my drift. This is like telling a Brit that he loves a Frenchy, or a French Canadian that he loves a British Canadian. Not good. But Frankie looked as bemused at the rest of us. The voice changed now, gaining the twang that could only belong to -well- me, and I was apparently admitting to having some rather inappropriate fun with various members of the roster. Yeah. The impressions continued. They were all good and the whole locker room was soon in stitches. When Sparky emerged, grinning from round a corner with a tray of donuts, he was given rapturous applause. Mainly because of the donuts, but also, I assume due to his amusing voices. With the workers already in good spirits I didn't bother with some sort of motivational speech, and the show was on!

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/AmericanNightmare.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/JimmyStratosphere.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MiltonHittlespitz.jpg
American Nightmare vs. Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Milton Hittlespitz
A strong match to start the night between the three faces. It was an easy match for me personally since both Jim and Milton are relatively talented, and thus I didn't need to work to hard to carry them. The match itself saw Stratosphere hitting various high flying moves mixed with ranas and stiff running strikes, while I did my best to engage in a technical faceoff match. Milton tried to match Stratosphere's high flying, failed, and resorted to cracking me across the face with chair. It was a comedy chair shot, since we're a comedy company, and was sold with a 'ping!' noise rather than a 'thunk'. Steve Yale, who's miced up, mumbled "What was that noise?", swinging around with his blind man's cane, and smacking Hittlespitz, slapstick-style, round the face, layig him out on the matA muffled cry of "Sorry! came from the ref as he realised what he'd done but it was too late for sorrys. A confused Stratosphere hit the Frog Splash on Hittlespitz for the pin, shouting at Yale to make sure he made the count.

Result: Jimmy Stratosphere defeated American Nightmare and Milton Hittlespitz in 8:24.
Rating: D+ (!!)
Notes: None.

***

The cameras follow an angry American Nightmare backstage to his locker room. He turns his back to the camera, removing his mask to reveal a lustrous mop of blond hair.
"I came to this company to prove to all you fans out there that USA and New Zealand have a lot in common."
Cheap pop.
"And tonight your wrestlers proved it. Two of your own hung with the very best the States have to offer."
More hurrays.
"But tonight was a one off. I am the American Nightmare, and I will bring my ethos of hard work, sweat and dissapointment to all those who think they're better than me. Don't get ****y, New Zealand. But most of all, don't act like Australians."
The cameras fade to black as the commentators discuss what the American Nightmare will have in store for us next time.

Rating: C+
Notes: Nil

***

Back out at the ring, X-Calibre saunters on down to a pop from the crowd. He backflips over the top rope into the ring and the commentators pass him a microphone.
" Hey, hey, bonza people!"
Cheer for the ridiculous Australiasian-ness of it all.
" It's come to my attention that the concept of a title is the best... thing... ever... You'll remember what I said when I got hold of it, and it holds true now. All the cool shiz that goes with having a title, without having to carry a heavy belt around."
(For those of you who don't know, the ZEN Conceptual Title is just that, the Concept of a Title. Yeah, I lol'd too.)
" So why is this awesome idea of a title figuratively round the waist of some crappy wannabe ninja? He dosen't even speak Japanese for the dingo danglies sake! I'm taking that shiz off him, because it's my shiz. X-Calibre is the best Calibre, and I'll prove it, if that little shiz will fight me!"

Rating: D
Notes: None

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/CWA.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/QuickSilver.jpg
C-W-A vs. Quick Silver

This was poor. Even by ZEN's relatively low standards, this was the worst match I've seen in years. I'll skip the actual match and go straight to the finish, the most fun part of the match. C-W-A floored Silver with a monster lariat, before slipping out the ring to where he'd set up a table. The crowd look worried; surely the Clown wasn't going to put Silver through a table?! No, actually he wasn't. He took a custard pie off the top the table, slid into the ring, and waited for Silver to stand. Whack! Silver staggered into the corner, cream all over his mask. Unfortunately some of the stuff smacked Steven Yale right in the face, and even a blind man can tell that that's a foreign object. He called for the bell.

Result: Quick Silver defeated C-W-A in 7:52 by disqualification.
Rating: E+
Notes: The announcers shone here, and Classy Paul tells me that C-W-A is showing a marked improvement in performance skills.

***

The match is over, but the clown antics very much weren't. With Silver down in the corner, C-W-A left the ring and went back to his table of clown tricks. He took two custard pies, and set them up on the top of two seperate turnbuckles. He then took a balloon, and- much to the delight of the junior members of the audience- tied a balloon Giraffe. Hooray! He re-entered the ring and held the balloon right next to Silver's head. He produced a pin... and... well... Bang.
"I don't get it." exclaimed Sparks "How come if Vertigo pops a balloon he immeadietly becomes public enemy number one, but if C-W-A pops it it's all good?"
"I guess that's a clown's prerogative," chortled Arturro in response.
Back in the ring, Silver has a hold of the back of Silver's head. He smashes hi headfirst into the custard pies on top of the turnbuckle. He then proceeded to the top turnbuckle, where he finally superplexed Silver through the table of clown tricks, which was still stacked with custard pies. He got to his feet and raised his arms to the crown before trekking out. Silver crawled after him, leaving a trail of white cream as he went.

Rating: E- (Oh, come on? The pieing was genius!)
Notes: None.

***

Ignoring the copious amounts of cream at ringside, Shaolin ninjas his way down to the ring, and enters with a suitably ninja like shuffle.
"He-woah," he began in his terrible faux-Asian accent. (think Kim-Jong Il from Team America) "I am deep-wi disturbed by X-Ca-wibre's attacks upon my personage. In response, I say, b-wing it!"
X-Ca-wibre (sorry) does indeed bring it, hurtling down to the ring. The match is on.

Rating: E+
Notes: None. Oh, is that co-wour (I'll stop now.) too hard to read?

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Shaolin.jpg
X-Calibre vs. Shao-win for the ZEN Conceptual Title (OK, I promise, no more.)

Ok, I take it back. This is poor by ZEN standards. From C-W-A and Silver I semi-expected it, but from Shaolin and X-Calibre? No way! Anyway, it was abominable. Or should that be abomina-wibble. Teehee. The end finally came when Quick Silver groaned very loudly during his escape up the ramp, causing X-Calibre to turn away. Shaolin hit the Death Touch on his distracted opponent for the win to retain his title.

Result: Shaolin defeated X-Calibre in 7:56 by pinfall with a Death Touch to make Defense #1 of his Conceptual Title.
Rating: E- (Fail. Or maybe Fai-wl)
Notes: The Announcers did a good job once more, but X-Calibre performed poorly, with the match dragging in the middle. X-Calibre's getting better at performing, though. The crowd pooed all over this.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Vertigo.jpghttp://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/SuperZero.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Jester.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Eraser.jpg
Sky Kings vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony titles

A slight improvement on the guff that went before, but not by much. Once again, I'm skipping straight to the relatively entertaining ending in which Vertigo super kicked Jester off the apron, behind the back of a clueless Yale while Super Zero hit the Radar Leg Drop for the cover.

Result: The Sky Kings defeated The Mercs in 7:37 when Vertigo defeated Eraser by pinfall with a Radar Legdrop to make #1 defence of the ZEN Harmony titles.
Rating: E+
Notes: Jester underperformed, but the Commentators did good once more. Everyone improved at something, with Vertigo's rumble getting better, while the others improved performance. Another match the crowd disliked.

***

Lone Shark hits the ring to good crowd pop.
"I am the Lone Shark. I am the Bigest Fish in this small, well shaped pool. And yet I'm not the champion? Man, that's messed up. The belt's round the waist of some weirdo who likes to dress up like a Skeleton? What kind of Freakshow is this!"
Some cheeky git in the crowd yells 'ZEN," and gets a laugh. Shark smiled in appreciation.
"Indeed, this is ZEN, and as you all know, I am the force that made ZEN. I am the force that is keeping F.E.A.R. from ravaging you sisters and wifes... and in the case of Halloween Knight, your Australians..."
I was in the lockeroom at this point. The howls of laughter were embarassingly loud.
"So, as a reward for my hard work, it is just right that I, Lone Shark should be the only true ZEN Master?"
"YES!" the crowd scream back. Shark turns to the back.
"The people have spoken, Knight. You won't turn them down."

Rating: E+
Notes: None.

***

Devilfish sidled down to the ring, hi-fiving Lone Shark as he passed him on the ramp. He entered the ring, only for Cyanide to come screaming out of the crowd to deck him with a shoulder check. Necromancer entered down the ramp, drawing instant heat from the crowd.
"Swim away, little fish. You are no match for F.E.A.R.!"
Devilfish scrambled to his feet and hit a huricanrana on Cyanide, before turning to face Necromancer and drawing a hand across his throat. The crowd cheered the sign of defiance, and Necromancer rushed to the ring. It's on.

Rating: E
Notes: None

***


http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Devilfish.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Necromancer.jpghttp://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Cyanide.jpg
Devilfish vs. Necromancer and Cyanide

Devilfish started on the front foot, Luchadore tactics to keeping his opponents back. He got a big cheer when he hit a missile dropkick on both of the heels as they got to their feet, but his cover was broken easily by Necromancer. It looked for a time that maybe Devilfish would do the unthinkable until Cyanide knocked him down and Devilfish locked in the Death Scream, with a good handful of ropes for leverage. The crowd booed, but all Yale could hear was the sound of Devilfish's hand tapping the mat.

Result: Necromancer and Cyanide defeated Devilfish in 13:14 when Necromancer defeated Devilfish by submission with a Death Scream after blatantly cheating.
Rating: D- (Disapointing)
Notes: Cyanide underperformed, badly. That'd explain the D-. He's probably still bitter that Frankie confiscated the book off him. Announcers once more did a sterling job, with Devilfish improving in both Technical and Performance skills. The crowd didn't like it. I'm getting bored of that note.

***

Lone Shark hit the ring again, big smile on his face.
"Well, it looks like our great and glorious champion has... how d'you say it... chickened out?"
Pop and laughter as Shark grinned out at his fans.
"Well, that his loss. If he dosen't defend his title, he must be scared of the Shark. And if he's scared of me, he must have realised that I will beat him."
Shark began to hum the Jaws theme. Further laughter.
"Since he isn't showing up, I might as well go to the back and take his favourite Austrai..."
With a chilling scream of anger, Halloween Knight emerged and ran to the ring, drawing instant heat from the crowd. He was wielding the belt like a weapon as he stared down Shark.
"Talk all you want, Shark." snarled the skeletal monster. "Where it matters, you can't hack it.
The two stared down. The crowd began a chant of Lone-Shark Lone-Shark Lone-Shark. In the words of Mike Goldberg, Here... we... go...

Rating: D-
Notes: None.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/LoneShark.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/HalloweenKnight.jpg
Lone Shark vs. Halloween Knight for the ZEN Master Title.

This was so, so nearly match of the night. The match had something for everyone as the two exchanged spectacular spots, bruising punches and fluid chain reversals, but the spark was sadly missing. With the two apparently dead locked, it took the intervention from the rest of F.E.A.R. for the reader to make it out of the ring with his title. Necromancer and Cyanide came down to ringside and circled the ring, shouting steadily more imagintive insults at Shark, who really did appear alone. Suitably distracted, Halloween Knight found a hole in Shark's game and locked on the Pumpkin Patch for the submission victory. The show ends as 3/4 of F.E.A.R. celebrate in the ring.

Result: Halloween Knight defeated Lone Shark in 16:08 by submission with a Pumpkin Patch. Halloween knight makes Defence #1 of the ZEN Master Title.
Rating: D
Notes: Both men were tiring by the end. If this was a little shorter, I think it could've got a D+. Once again the Announcers did their jobs well.

Show Overall: D- (How close was this to a D? :()

[Jaded]

Really, really good start - well done! Particularly liked the CWA stuff, and the American Nightmare promo. :)

[TheKenwyne]

Predicition Results:

Timber: 4/6
Jaded: 5/6

Good job Jaded. Potential reward later, if I can find something to reward you with.

Tomorrow: Owner goals, monthly recap, regional battles and boy bands. In ZEN, anything can (and often will) happen).

[TheKenwyne]

January 2010 Recap

January was a crazy month, but that's probably because I'm not quite into the ZEN groove yet. Up there at the top of the craziness was Mr. Zendis calling me to his office every other day to give me update owner goals. Dude, make your mind up. Anyway, since it's the end of the month (and the pre release demo), I present to you the current set of owner goals according the Zendis himself.

Goal #1: ZEN cannot fall into debt at any time. (Critical)
Yes, I like this one. Simple, and I simply know it's near impossible to fail. In a show I used most of my roster on, I made $7,500 profit. That one's going well.

Goal #2: ZEN must not fall below Small in size (Critical)
Another easy-ish one. To succeed I must put shows that gain a rating of over F+. Oh, the challenge.

Goal #3: You cannot hire or extend the contract of any wrestler who has less than D- in stamina. (Average)
On the current roster, this goal only threatens Quick Silver, and he has exactly D- stamina and and over a year to improve by one grade. Not tricky. And hiring anyone with less stamina than this was never in my plans.

Goal #4: You can't hire any wrestler over the age of 35. (Average)
Slightly more irritating. The oldest wrestler on the roster is still in his 20s, but the majority of the big name stars on the big island are older men, meaning if I ever attempt to invade Australia, I may find myself struggling.

Goal #5: You cannot hire or extend the contract of any wrestler who has less than D- in Athletic ability. (Average)
No-one's in trouble from this particular objective. We're all fit young things here at ZEN.

In conclusion, a nice set of goals that only leave one wrestler fearing for his job and don't limit my plans at all. There were only three objectives to start with, with Zendis adding the others as the month wore on. Hopefully he'll stick with his current selection now that I've commited them to writing. In other business news, there was a Regional Battle (Oooooh!) in New Zealand this month, which, obviously, we were inolved in. We didn't do well, though, finishing third behind APW and RAW. Nothing to be ashamed of there, though. Give us a few months and hopefully we'll be breathing down those punk's necks.

Round up of Austrailian rasslin':

APW put on one show, Ozzfest, that notched a C- rating in front of 1,000 people at a sold out Fuster Hall in Eastern Australia. Swoop McCarthy was MVP.

DIW meanwhile gave the world Prove Yorself, acheiving a D- rating in front of 152 people at Marv's Sports Center in Eastern Australia. The Comedian was MVP.

RAW held 4 TV shows, rendering 3 D+s in and 1 D, and The Stars of RAW 11 that went down in front of 2,000 people at a sold out JDM arena. It only got a D, though. Molokai Milk was the best performer.

Noteable other news from the wrestling world: Both 5SSW and GCG in Japan have risen a size, to Regional and Cult respectively.

Former 5SSW All Asian Champ HEART Saitoh is out for over a year with a shattered elbow.

And now for something completely different: NO-ONE DIED THIS MONTH!

The internet holds many surveys every month. One of these surveys selected a ZEN worker for an award. And the winner is (drum roll, please)...

C-W-A for best custard pie segment! No? Why not? *disappears into the background, grumbling*

In reality it was....
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg
X-Calibre, who, according to the internet is the Best Young Prospect in Wrestling Today!

I hope he shows it at the next show. Best Young Prospects in Wrestling Today don't churn out E- matches. Not ever.

And finally, one signing. As I was hunting through the free agency, one name caught my eye, due to his good repetoire of high flying skills, and having a name that is blatantly a cross between some pop stars. So allow me to introduce the latest addition to the ZEN roster,
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/RodSullivan.jpg
Rod Sullivan
What he'll be doing? Jobbing, getting better. He's got the performance, flying and entertainment skills to make it, he just has to get some experience down.

Next time: The card for the next ZEN show, and any further shenanigans of note.

[Jaded]

Cool, I like Sullivan. He needs a suitable ZENny gimmick though! :D

[Rathen4]

High five on the Sullivan hire. Where's his partner though!?

[TheKenwyne]

Dosen't fit ZEN quite like his partner does - and I have no real need of another tag team right now. I'm trying to build ZEN largely with flyers, and Gilbert is very much a mat worker.

[TheKenwyne]

Another two weeks passed without major incident, and it was time to book another evening of ZEN fun. Below is the card for the second ZEN offering under my rule.

ZEN Way of the Scholar 2010
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. X-Calibre
Nightmare Stalker vs. Quick Silver
Man O'War vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon
Shaolin vs. Eraser (ZEN Conceptual Title)
The Sky Kings (Super Zero and Vertigo) vs. The Enemy (Massacre and Cyanide) (ZEN Harmony Titles)
DevilShark (Lone Shark and Devilfish) vs. The Dark Knights (Necromancer and Halloween Knight)

Card will be up tomorrow, predicitions will be rewarded in roughly four shows time with a big choice at the end of an upcoming storyline!

[Jingo]

ZEN Way of the Scholar 2010
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. X-Calibre
i'll pick the ZEN original for now ..
Nightmare Stalker vs. Quick Silver
The cool facepaint swings it for me
Man O'War vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon
This was a tough pick
Shaolin vs. Eraser
The Champ wins
The Sky Kings (Super Zero and Vertigo) vs. The Enemy (Massacre and Cyanide)
See above ..
DevilShark (Lone Shark and Devilfish) vs. The Dark Knights (Necromancer and Halloween Knight)
Gotta give the faces a win here.

[1PWfan]

Jimmy Stratosphere vs. X-Calibre
Stratosphere's a good fit for ZEN, but X-Calibre's capable of better than he did last time- he can't carry anyone, but put him with someone decent and he'll usually deliver

Nightmare Stalker vs. Quick Silver
Neither of these two is any good, but Stalker's slightly better

Man O'War vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon
With all the love Gordon's been getting on the board he's got to go over here

Shaolin vs. Eraser
Neither of these guys is owt much, but Shaolin's got the all-round game that makes him the better guy at this point

The Sky Kings (Super Zero and Vertigo) vs. The Enemy (Massacre and Cyanide)
Sky Kings don't have the massive sucking weight of Massacre on their side

DevilShark (Lone Shark and Devilfish) vs. The Dark Knights (Necromancer and Halloween Knight)
Heels can take the win here without destroying the babyfaces

[Jaded]

Jimmy Stratosphere vs. X-Calibre - Get Jimmy a mask, stat!
Nightmare Stalker vs. Quick Silver - Stalker is okay, but he's a jobber.
Man O'War vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon - Superpush MUJG...
Shaolin vs. Eraser - Shaolin's rockin'.
The Sky Kings (Super Zero and Vertigo) vs. The Enemy (Massacre and Cyanide) - Not keen on Cyanide
DevilShark (Lone Shark and Devilfish) vs. The Dark Knights (Necromancer and Halloween Knight) - Shark to get the win back after last show.

[Kainlock]

Jimmy Stratosphere vs. X-Calibre
Nightmare Stalker vs. Quick Silver
Man O'War vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon
Shaolin vs. Eraser
The Sky Kings (Super Zero and Vertigo) vs. The Enemy (Massacre and Cyanide)
DevilShark (Lone Shark and Devilfish) vs. The Dark Knights (Necromancer and Halloween Knight)

[Zergon]

Nice start you got a reader here. I don´t know much about any ZEN guys but not knowing somethink haven´t never stopped me for embarrass myself:o

ZEN Way of the Scholar 2010
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. X-Calibre
X-Calibre is higher on the card and the best prospect so I go with him even though it pains me to pick against Jimmy

Nightmare Stalker vs. Quick Silver
Silver is higher on the card so I go with him in this jobber vs. jobber match

Man O'War vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon
Gordon seems to be everyones new favorite guy

Shaolin vs. Eraser (ZEN Conceptual Title)
Shaolin picks another title defence

The Sky Kings (Super Zero and Vertigo) vs. The Enemy (Massacre and Cyanide) (ZEN Harmony Titles)
Sky Kings won´t drop their titles yet

DevilShark (Lone Shark and Devilfish) vs. The Dark Knights (Necromancer and Halloween Knight
Lone Shark picks a tag win to keep the feud going

[flat_doughnut]

Jimmy Stratosphere vs. X-Calibre
If X-Cal can sort out his stamina issues, he can be a top dog in ZEN. I like Jimmy, but he needs a mask. Masks are success in ZEN.
Nightmare Stalker vs. Quick Silver
The Horror Show used to be something. Used to be.
Man O'War vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon
I will always pick Gordon to win.
Shaolin vs. Eraser (ZEN Conceptual Title)
I know you dislike Eraser. No danger he is winning here.
The Sky Kings (Super Zero and Vertigo) vs. The Enemy (Massacre and Cyanide) (ZEN Harmony Titles)
F.E.A.R. don't need more titles. Plsu without the Harmony belts, The Sky Kings are kind of boring.
DevilShark (Lone Shark and Devilfish) vs. The Dark Knights (Necromancer and Halloween Knight)
Stack the odds against Devilfish so its much better when Lone Shark finally gets his hands on the ZEN Master title again.

[MaxxHexx]

Jimmy Stratosphere vs. X-Calibre Jimmy is cool in APW, but lame in ZEN, he needs a gimmick.
Nightmare Stalker vs. Quick Silver Superior skills.
Man O'War vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon I think I am the only one who doesn't mark for MUJG. I can't see him losing though.
Shaolin vs. Eraser (ZEN Conceptual Title) No reason to give it to a tag guy.
The Sky Kings (Super Zero and Vertigo) vs. The Enemy (Massacre and Cyanide) (ZEN Harmony Titles) Backfiring cheating maybe? Plus, I love Super Zero!
DevilShark (Lone Shark and Devilfish) vs. The Dark Knights (Necromancer and Halloween Knight) They cheat for the win.

[TheKenwyne]

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ZEN.jpg
ZEN Way of the Scholar 2010
Held at the ZEN Dojo in front of 82 people

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/JimmyStratosphere.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg

Jimmy Stratosphere vs. X-Calibre

That’s more like it, Calibre. A match between to stellar high flyers was always going to include large amounts of top rope shenanigans, and this did, with both wrestlers bouncing round the ring hitting sentons, missile dropkicks, and other high flying moves. The end came with a trademark Springboard 460 (X-Calibre- OTT as possible) from X-Calibre in a solid opening match.

Result: Calibre defeated Jimmy Stratosphere in 8:46 by pinfall with a Springboard 460.
Rating: D-
Notes: Announcers knuckle down straight away, and X-Calibre’s getting better at flying. The crowd stamp the match with their ‘DISLIKE’ seal.

***

We head backstage next, and find ourselves in Devilfish’s locker room. (It’s the whole of ZEN’s locker room really; we can’t afford to give everyone his or her own little space!) Lone Shark cruised through the door. Devilfish looked up and acknowledged him with a sort of grunt-chuckle. Lone Shark, looking suitably weirded out, tried for some actual conversation.
“Hey there, buddy, Devilfish!”
Devilfish offered a maddened giggle in reply. Shark, looking severly estranged now, continued.
“I was thinking man, last month we both got screwed over by those malevolent gits in F.E.A.R., not because they’re better than us, but because they outnumber us. You know what they say, Fish, fight fire with fire. If we team up it’s going to be much harder for them to beat on us. Together we could, you know, win.” he finished, rather lamely.
Devilfish stood and they stared down, nose to nose – well, nose to chest, Devilfish is tiny – before sticking his hand and offering an authoritative bark of laughter. They shook, Lone Shark looking as scared as possible beneath his mask.
“Great, ‘Fish. I’ll see you late yeah… for wrestling?” Fish nodded. Fish exited back out the door, with the cameras hot on his heels.
“Damn they hit him hard on the head last month.”

Rating: D-

***

Hype videos for midcard title matches= baaad idea.

Rating: F

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/NightmareStalker.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/QuickSilver.jpg
Nightmare Stalker vs. Quick Silver

This match was used to cool the crowd down. Honest. As if they needed it. Hot damn, this was bad. Silver kept missing spots, while Stalker kept flooring him with lariats (good) and then going for some amazing submission that I will dub the Leg Hump (bad). Stalker eventually ended the pain with a Frightmare.

Result: Nightmare Stalker defeated Quick Silver in 5:45 by pinfall with a Frightmare.
Rating: E-
Notes: Announcers did well (no shock there, then). Crowd hated it (again, no sh1t sherlock. I hated it, and I booked it.)

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ManOWar.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MirrorUniverseJonGordon.jpg
Man O’War vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon

‘Could do better’ were the words that leapt to mind. Two midcarders better known for their characters and charisma over actual in ring ability, and it showed. Man (such a rubbish short name) was well on top, until Guru Vishni (Gordon’s manager. Paying attention at the back?) gave him a smack in the codgers with his Indian cane (of course Yale didn’t see it, he’s blind) and allowing Gordon to hit the wonderfully named Goatee Driver for the win.

Result: Mirror Universe John Gordon defeated Man O' War in 5:48 by pinfall with a Goatee Driver.
Rating: E
Notes: Man O’War’s character’s stale. And before I even got to write one nautical-y themed promo for him. :(. And he under performed. Guru Vishni did well at ringside for Gordon, the commentators did well and Man O’War’s technical skills are getting better.

***

Despite one half being slightly insane, both members of Devilshark managed to make the ring on time following the last segment.
“Isn’t this familiar?” Lone Shark began. Some daft mark replied to the rhetorical question.
“Yes!” Laughter. Shark grinned serenely, an effect slightly dispelled by the diabolical laughter emanating from Devilfish.
“Indeed it is! Here I am, once again, begging for a match from our great and glorious champion! But this time, he doesn’t even have to risk anything! He just has to come out here, with that jackass Necromancer, and fight myself and my partner here in a straight on tag team brawl. And if he’s a real man, then he won’t have to bring along his usual collection of ragamuffin henchmen. Because we all know that to beat a Lone wolf, or a Lone Shark for that matter, you have to be one. So I say, bring it. Come and test the waters, but don’t come to deep, because DevilShark will rip you apart!”
The ‘Jaws’ theme hits, and the two heroes ‘swim’ to the back, making shark fins with their hands.
Rating: E+


***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Shaolin.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Eraser.jpg
Shaolin vs. Eraser for the ZEN Conceptual title.

Once again I find myself blaming Shaolin’s opponent for this. It was still disappointing from two midcard fixtures who should do better than this. Shaolin nailed Eraser with a Death Touch to retain. The crowd (bemusingly) got really into it, but the wrestling was simply crap.

Result: Shaolin defeated Eraser in 9:13 by pinfall with a Death Touch. Shaolin makes defence number 2 of his ZEN Conceptual title.
Rating: E-
Notes: Damn Eraser. Another one off his game tonight. I’m starting to think ZEN workers spend more time off their game than on it. The bout also dragged in the middle, which didn’t help. Then announcers did what they get paid for, but the crowd didn’t like it. 3/4 , lads, 3/4.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/SuperZero.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Vertigo.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Cyanide.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Massacre.jpg
The Sky Kings vs. The Enemy for the ZEN Harmony Titles.

F.E.A.R. went for the Tag Team gold here, but they were outclassed. Cyanide put up a fine fight as he exchanged technical holds with Super Zero, but Vertigo flat out dealt Massacre, destroying him with high flying tactics and leaving the lumbering giant in pain and humiliated. But the end came when a familiar SPLAT noise and Vertigo collapsing to the ground, custard everywhere. More pies followed as C-W-A ran to the ring. Yale called for the bell as he staggered away, covered in cream.

Result: The Sky Kings defeated The Enemy in 11:16 by DQ. The Sky Kings make defence #2 of the ZEN Harmony Titles.
Rating: D-
Notes: The colour commentary did well, and Massacre got better at performance skills. The crowd sulked. Surprise, surprise.

***

C-W-A, once again, doesn’t appear to know when to quit. He has brought a trolley stacked high with custard pies, but he left it out side the ring as he entered, stalking over to Vertigo. Vertigo, trying to wipe cream from his eyes, can’t stop C-W-A hitting the Clown Killer Deluxe. Molly Cuddle, The Sky Kings’ manager, and Super Zero sprung into action, rushing to the aid of their fallen comrade. C-W-A distracted them with his spinning bow tie before quitting the ring and stocking up on custard pies. As he re-entered, Cyanide and Massacre, who had thus far been watching, appalled, did the manly thing and bailed to the back. SPLAT! Super Zero went down like a sack of bricks, nailed with a custard pie. SPLAT! Molly Cuddle staggered away, rolling out of the ring, face covered in cream. A house mic picks up her mumbling “I hate cream pies,” sending the more mature members of the audience into fits of laughter, and leaving the bemuse youngsters to enquire as to why that’s so funny. Elsewhere, C-W-A, now with a unicycle, waited for Vertigo to recover his feet before laying him out once more with the unicycle. ‘Send in the Clowns’ hit, and C-W-A left the stage, bow tie spinning, little horn honking, and carnage in his wake.

Rating: E (C-W-A’s pie skillz are improving!)

***

Backstage, in the F.E.A.R. dressing room, Halloween Knight was giving the troops a pep talk.
“So that’s the plan?” Murmured affirmatives from the other members of F.E.A.R. followed.
“Good. Ah, a camera. Just what I needed.” Halloween Knight grabbed the lens of the camera and leaned in.
“Be afraid, DevilShark. Be very, very afraid.”
Rating: D

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/LoneShark.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Devilfish.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/HalloweenKnight.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Necromancer.jpg
DevilShark vs. The Dark Knights

Lone Shark and Necromancer started in the ring for this one. While these two exchanged holds, Cyanide and Massacre slunk to the ringside and started ‘distracting’ Devilfish. If ‘distracting’ counts as pulling him off the apron and laying on the boots. Shark tried to go his partner’ aid, but left himself open and Necromancer floored him with a neck breaker. Fortunately for Devilfish, one member of the roster had had enough of F.E.A.R.’s shenanigans, and Shaolin steamed out of the crowd, tackling Cyanide and giving Devilfish time to regain his feet. As the brawl outside the ring continued, the match inside intensified, with Lone Shark and Necromancer exchanging at break neck pace. An exhausted Necromancer tagged out, and the tired Lone Shark found himself face-to-face with a fresh Halloween Knight. He didn’t stand a chance, and even less so when Necromancer hit a big lariat on the ref and joined in the uneven beating on the ‘Big Fish in the ZEN pool’. The crowd booed lustily. Devilfish, noticing his partner’s predicament, rolled back into the ring and rejoined the brawl. At the commentary desk, The Alex Arturro Experience jumped to his feet.
“This is a JOKE!”

Result: DevilShark drew with the Dark Knights after 15:05 following a Double DQ.
Rating: D
Notes: The commentary did good, and Halloween Knight’s performance skills increased.

***

Arturro was livid. He strode into the ring and hauled the brawling workers apart.
“Stop it, fools!” he screamed. He lent over the ropes and sent Shaolin, Cyanide and Massacre to the back with a stare that could’ve levelled a mountain. Necromancer tried to hit his Death Scream on the distracted colour man, but Arturro avoided it, and smacked him round the head with his pimp cane. It broke. Necromancer collapsed to the floor, sobbing.
“Why you crying! You pathetic! Get some nuts! FOOL!” Arturro hollered, right into the downed Necromancer’s face. Halloween Knight went for Arturro, but Lone Shark shoulder checked him to the mat.
“This here… this was a disgrace! It so pathetic, I actually vomited…”
“And he’s not lying, folks…” Sparks added, aside.
“ ‘cos it make me sick to see you villains resorting to underhand tactics. It won’t be the same, next month, you pathetic FOOLS!” Arturro kicked Necromancer for good measure, before summoning a bemused DevilShark with a curl of his finger and cruising to the back, to rapturous applause.
“What does all this mean for ZEN? Is there a new force in the promotion? Find out these answers, and more at Way of the Healer 2010, next month.”

Rating: E+ (Nargh, forgot to tell Arturro to turn face. Poo.)

Show Rating: D- (Meh. Obviously I’ve found my ground.

Predictions: Out of Total Matches predicted, (%)

Jaded: 9/12 (75%)
Timber: 4/6 (66%)
Jingo: 4/6 (66%)
1PW Fan: 5/6 (83%)
Kainlock: 4/6 (66%)
Zergon: 4/6 (66%)
Flat_doughnut: 4/6 (66%)
MaxxHexx: 4/6 (66%)

1PW_Fan takes the lead with embarrassing skill. Still, no one’s got a perfect score, yet.

Next time: Monthly recap, card for Way of the Healer 2010.

[MaxxHexx]

To me, it kinda looks like you made your roster look terrible with that last segment. All this time you are building up characters and such, and then you color guy proves he is better than your main eventers. Sure it was meant as comedy, but he made your heel stable back off with a glance, and your champ was on the ground crying after one shot...

Everything else was fine though.

[TheKenwyne]

February 2010 Recap

ZEN News:

The owner goals are still the same. 'Nuff said. Roster news is also short, with no new editions and nine month contract extensions for lower card heel Mirror Universe John Gordon and his manager Guru Vishni. Otherwise, internally, it's been a pretty boring month here at ZEN. Though boring by ZEN standards would make an exciting month at... ooh, USPW?... look absolutely, mind-numbingly, tearing-your-hair outingly shocking. Yeah. We're that awesome here.

Austrailian Wrestling News:

APW signed DIW tag team champ Warmonger to a PPA deal this month. Another big, charismatic brawler finds his way to Sports Entertainment Central, Oz. They also put on the show Big Night Out, in front of 1,000 people at a sold out Fuster Hall, scoring a C-, with Swoop McCarthy (predictably) carrying the show.

DIW lost Warmonger, because he didn't want to kill himself, and because he liked APW more. Good move, son. Asylum extended his deal with the promotion, though. Their show, Championship Bout, scored D in front of 149 people at Marv's Sport Centre. The Comedian was MVP.

RAW had a title change, with Captain Wrestling II and Kerry Wayne nabbing the tag team titles off Quiz Master and Quizzical Question Mark. Isaac Taylor and Manhunter resigned. RAW Attitude's four episodes all got D, and The Stars of Raw notched a D+, with Echo turning in performance of the night.

Other Wrestling News

SWF rose to Global this month. Cue Richard Eisen's power maddened celebratory dance.

Fan Feedback

To me, it kinda looks like you made your roster look terrible with that last segment. All this time you are building up characters and such, and then you color guy proves he is better than your main eventers. Sure it was meant as comedy, but he made your heel stable back off with a glance, and your champ was on the ground crying after one shot...

Stupid Smark. Go away. Nah, I kid ;). Aside from pointing out your technical mistake that it's actually not my champion on the floor crying, that's his lackey and tag team partner, I kinda agree with you. But hey, I'm the booker. I'm telling a story, and if I want my colour guy to become a monsterous destructo-machine he will do. If you're complaining about a colour guy, how about complaining about a psychotic clown with no wrestling skills tooling my tag team champs with custard pies? ZEN's not meant to make sense. Except to mad people. At least, MY ZEN dosen't.

And that brings another month to a close. But it also brings the curtain up on March, and with March, our next event. Card below, get predictin'/slagging off my appaling booking.

ZEN Way of the Healer 2010
American Nightmare vs. X-Calibre
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Jester
C-W-A vs. Vertigo
Cyanide vs. Devilfish
Shaolin vs. Halloween Knight (Non Title)
Lone Shark vs. Necromancer

Card? Probably tomorrow, maybe Thursday. Really depends how time falls, because this was originally going up tomorrow, but got promoted because I'm bored. Predicitions will still give you that pivotal choice, which I can now say for nearly certain will be at ZEN Way of the Jester, the June card.

[Huntman]

American Nightmare vs. X-Calibre
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Jester
C-W-A vs. Vertigo
Cyanide vs. Devilfish
Shaolin vs. Halloween Knight (Non Title)
Lone Shark vs. Necromancer

[MaxxHexx]

American Nightmare vs. X-Calibre He cheats to win. 'The Experience' debuts his 'change'.
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Jester Jimmy needs a gimmick.
C-W-A vs. Vertigo He may be a clown with no skills, but have you ever been pied? Not a fun experience. It is at least believable.
Cyanide vs. Devilfish Lone Shark helps.
Shaolin vs. Halloween Knight (Non Title) Keep him strong, only way he could lose is by interference.
Lone Shark vs. Necromancer Build him up for his showdown with Halloween Knight

[TheKenwyne]

C-W-A vs. Vertigo He may be a clown with no skills, but have you ever been pied? Not a fun experience. It is at least believable.


Funily enough, I have. The cream was off. Most unpleasant. You?

[Jaded]

American Nightmare vs. X-Calibre
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Jester
C-W-A vs. Vertigo
Cyanide vs. Devilfish
Shaolin vs. Halloween Knight (Non Title)
Lone Shark vs. Necromancer

[MaxxHexx]

Funily enough, I have. The cream was off. Most unpleasant. You?

Yup, Doing volunteer work for kids camps often leads to being pied. Luckily I have short hair.

I doubt anyone could fight with cream pie in the eye.

[LoNdOn]

Yup, Doing volunteer work for kids camps often leads to being pied. Luckily I have short hair.

I doubt anyone could fight with cream pie in the eye.

There is a sexual joke in there somewhere, I just can't put my finger on it :p Good diary!

[Jingo]

Loving this so far makes me chuckle which is always good! :D

American Nightmare vs. X-Calibre
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Jester
C-W-A vs. Vertigo
Cyanide vs. Devilfish
Shaolin vs. Halloween Knight (Non Title)
Lone Shark vs. Necromancer

[Zergon]

American Nightmare vs. X-Calibre
He´s still the future MVP

Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Jester
Jester is mainly a tag guy so he can take a loss here

C-W-A vs. Vertigo
C-W-A is getting DQ loss again when he hits Vertigo with foreign object:p

Cyanide vs. Devilfish
Both could use a win but I go with Cyanide so that he can redeem his horrible last month

Shaolin vs. Halloween Knight (Non Title)
Knight takes an easy win here

Lone Shark vs. Necromancer
Lone Shark is feuding with F.E.A.R´s leader so he isn´t losing to henchman who gets manhandled by a color commentator

[TheKenwyne]

Yup, Doing volunteer work for kids camps often leads to being pied. Luckily I have short hair.

I doubt anyone could fight with cream pie in the eye.

I do holiday clubs at various churchs/big Christian events. You'd think Christianity would discourage such violent, humiliating activity, but no.

Lol. I have long hair, so sucks to be me. And just to make it better, after I'd showered and got into my non-creamed kit, one of my lovely band mates thought it would be funny to pie me again. Ha, ha, ha.

And looks like the card will be THURSDAY, because I have band practice and a rehearsal for a play.

[TheKenwyne]

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ZEN.jpg
ZEN Way of the Healer
Held at the ZEN Temple in front of 72 people

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/AmericanNightmare.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg
American Nightmare vs. X-Calibre

This match was here to be good, and it delivered on that goal. After his stinker back in January, Calibre’s been much improved, and that was the case here, exchanging high flying moves with myself until he nailed his trademark Springboard 460 for the cover.

Result: X-Calibre defeated American Nightmare in 7:04 by pinfall with a Springboard 460.
Rating: D
Notes: Nope, we can’t afford these.

***

The Alex Arturro Experience strutted into the ring, his pimp cane taped back together after it’s meeting with Necromancer’s forehead last month, carrying a velvet bag that made an interesting clinking noise as he walked.
“Can the fools who were involved in that catastrophe of a main event last month get their asses down here?” F.E.A.R., minus Massacre, Devilfish, Lone Shark and Shaolin all trooped down to the ring. Shark, Shaolin and Devilfish stand flanking Arturro inside the ring, while F.E.A.R. huddle on the outside.
“Now after last month’s shenanigans, these fine, upstanding FOOLS and I have decided that the only way to fight fire, is with fire…”
Here Devilfish gave a derisive snort, and Shaolin muttered, clearly audible, something about that just w-eading to a big fire.
“… so we have created something fresh and new, a power that will give ZEN new life, and protect it from evil. Ladies and fools, I give you… The DevilShark Experience!”
“ And Shao-win, Too.” added Shaolin, belatedly. F.E.A.R. looked unimpressed.
“Which brings me to tonight. Tonight will see a best of three series, with the winning faction booking next month’s main event. During these matches, all wrestlers not competing will be barred from ringside.”
“On whose authority do you make this match, sir?” lisped Halloween Knight, unpleasantly.
“On mine, fool! Now quit interrupting. As I was saying, the match ups for this series will be decided by drawing balls from my sack.”
Comedians. You can’t take them anywhere. The message had been put across, though, and first F.E.A.R. drew their numbers, then The DevilShark Experience, And Shaolin Too. The men milled around until they stood next to their opponents for later tonight, Shaolin vs. Halloween Knight, Devilfish vs. Cyanide and Lone Shark vs. Necromancer. Sparks spoke:
“Of course, folks, if Lone Shark’s team win, they can make a ZEN Master title match with all wrestlers barred from ringside, giving Shark the chance to prove that he, is, once and for all, the better man. Conversely, if F.E.A.R. win, then they could book our three heroes in a series of gruelling matches to injure them, and then take Shaolin’s Conceptual title away from him when he is injured. All these men are putting a lot on the line. We’ll see whose gamble pays off, later tonight.”

Rating: E
Notes: Cyanide’s character needs freshening up, Halloween Knight is improving in performance skills.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/JimmyStratosphere.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Jester.jpg
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Jester

This could have been so much better, but as it was, both men were just not in this match, and so it appeared a little bit wooden. Still, wooden by these two’s standards is pretty damn good by most ZEN wrestler’s. Stratosphere nailed the Frog Splash for the cover.

Result: Jimmy Stratosphere defeated Jester in 7:44 by pinfall.
Rating: E+
Notes: Both men were off their game tonight, and the commentators did well.

***

C-W-A was walking backstage when the Sky Kings rounded the corner, complete with Molly Cuddle. Vertigo went straight for the clown, who was, for once, without custard pies. The stare down lasted for over ten seconds, until C-W-A produced a horn, and honked it right in Vertigo’s face. Vertigo jumped away, shocked, and was about to go crazy on the smirking clown before Super Zero dragged him away. Molly Cuddle spoke.
“Umm… shall we take this to the ring?” Two angry affirmatives. The cameras followed the workers to the ring, and as Super Zero and Molly Cuddle slunk from view, the bell rang.

Rating: E+

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/CWA.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Vertigo.jpg
C-W-A vs. Vertigo

Once again, C-W-A proves that wrestling isn’t his strong point. Not bad, but not great, as in Jimmy and Jester achieved this off form. The finish, however, was fun, with Super Zero, seeing his partner struggling under a furious avalanche of attacks that may or may not have included a fake flower squirt to the eye, rushing to the ring and attempting to save his partner. He failed, though, C-W-A sidestepping the attack, and Super Zero decked Vertigo. C-W-A, ever the opportunist, knocked Super Zero to the floor with a lariat and quickly made the pin on the downed Vertigo. C-W-A minced from the ring, obviously pleased with the cheap victory. Zero tried to help his partner up, but Vertigo pushed him away and stormed backstage, livid.

Result: C-W-A defeated Vertigo in 7:27 by pinfal
Rating: E+

***

A short video played hyping the night’s main event, Lone Shark vs. Necromancer.

Rating: E+

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Cyanide.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Devilfish.jpg
Cyanide vs. Devilfish

In the first match of the best of three series for Main Event booking privileges next month, Cyanide looked outclassed. Mainly because he tried to beat Devilfish at what he does best (flying) and failing miserably. The match was entertaining enough, and Devilfish closed out the win via pinfall.

Result: Devilfish defeated Cyanide in 13:19 by pinfall.
Rating: E+
Notes: Announcers did well, crowd hate it. Rinse and repeat…

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/HalloweenKnight.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Shaolin.jpg
Halloween Knight vs. Shaolin (Non Title Match)

Match number two saw ZEN’s two singles champs go toe to toe. It is also a fine example of why Shaolin is among the bester workers on the roster. Despite being off his game, the ninja with the speech impediment still churned out a contender for match of the night, with an entertaining back and forth exchange with Halloween Knight. Eventually, however, Shaolin found himself tapping out to Knight’s trademark Pumpkin Patch submission.

Result: Halloween Knight defeated Shaolin in 13:32 by submission with a Pumpkin Patch.
Rating: D-
Notes: Shaolin was off his game. On his game, I think this could have been a D, or even a D+. Shame. He’s getting better at performance skills, too. The commentators did well, but the crowd still didn’t like it. Fussy gits.

***

Halloween Knight was celebrating in the ring, when, quite intentionally, he stamped on the downed Shaolin. At ringside, Arturro jumped from the announcer’s desk.
“I’ve had enough of this fool!” he screamed, leaping into the ring and waving his pimp cane angrily. He took a swing, but Halloween Knight ducked under it and speared the comedian to the ground. Once there, he locked on the Pumpkin Patch. Arturro screamed in agony, and Sparky Sparks raced from the commentary table to aid various members of the backstage crew haul Knight off him. Knight turned to the booing fans and screamed
“Fear the F.E.A.R.!” as he was dragged off. Arturro also exited, by way of a stretcher.
I made my way down to ringside to join Sparks on commentary in the absence of his usual partner. We both sounded suitably shaken as the main event began.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/LoneShark.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Necromancer.jpg
Lone Shark vs. Necromancer

Without the pitfalls of being ‘off game’, these two went ahead and put on a show. Both men flew, brawled and mat wrestled in a fine match that really got the crowd involved. Necromancer frequently resorted to sly eye pokes and low blows, but Shark battled through the pain to secure the pin following a Blood in the Water. He rose to celebrate, but the arena lights went off, suddenly, and instead of Shark’s music hitting, the big screen lit up with the silhouettes of four male figures. A distorted voice spoke.
“Two months. We will have the last laugh.”

All of sudden the lights flashed back up, and a bemused Lone Shark celebrated belatedly, looking warily around. The rest of The DevilShark Experience hit the ring to join the celebrations, and the show ended as Sparks put over how this could be the beginning of the end of Halloween Knight’s ZEN title reign.

Result: Lone Shark defeated Necromancer in 14:09 by pinfall with a Blood In The Water.
Rating: D (Match) F (Angle) – In hindsight, I could have just left this to the diary and not the show, since a hype video with four unknowns was never going to work.
Notes: None.

Overall: D- (Hey, at least I’m consistent!)

Predictions:


Jaded: 14/18 (78%)
Timber: 4/6 (66%)
Jingo: 9/12 (75%)
1PW Fan: 5/6 (83%)
Kainlock: 4/6 (66%)
Zergon: 8/12 (66%)
Flat_doughnut: 4/6 (66%)
MaxxHexx: 8/12 (66%)
Huntman: 2/6 (33%)

People underlined have not predicted for two events, and next event I will remove their stats from my list.

Next time: The month recap and next month's card. Until then, who thinks they know who the mysterious quartet are?

[TheKenwyne]

March 2010 Recap

ZEN News

No, not much of this. There were some signings, but they're 'sekrit', so I can't tell you. Oh, sorry, I meant they're 'sekrit in Kayfabe.' Backstage was also done... I came here expecting quirks galore and comedy, and we've had one session of impressions and that's IT in three months. Snore.

Australian Wrestling Recap

APW held Fight Night 2010 in front of a sell out crowd at the Fuster Hall. The show got a C rating, with Swoop McCarthy doing the predictable and being MVP.

DIW popped to Small this month following their D rated Ego Has Landed, held in front of 204 people at Marv's Sports Central. The Comedian was MVP. They signed plenty of newcomers to go with the rise in size: Septimus Stubbs, Victor Goliath, Maurice Jackson, Nicky Gilbert, Vaughan Signs and Angus McMiller all joined the hardcore gravy train. Asylum, Dean Hawkins and Mace Mueller all extended their deals with the company.

RAW held another four TV shows, getting one D+ and three Ds. The monthly 'big' show scored D+, in front of a sold out JDM arena, with Britinni Burke (I know) MVP.

World Wrestling News

Along with DIW's rise to Small, TCW also got a boost in size, reaching International and clinging bravely to SWF's coat tails.

Eisaku Hoshino returned to wrestling after giving up on his Japanese presidential campaign (hiatus). He was quickly snapped up by BHOTWG on a Short Term deal.

Brent Hill joins the Shattered Elbow club, the multi time TCW champ is out for over a year.

Marihito Masuko of BHOTWG Junior division fame is out for over a month with bruised calf muscles. He intends to work through the pain.

The Next Card...

ZEN Way of the Philosopher 2010
Milton Hittlespitz vs. Jester
Cyanide vs. American Nightmare
The Sky Kings (Vertigo and Super Zero) (c) vs. X-War (X-Calibre and Man O'War) - ZEN Harmony Titles
Shaolin (c) vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon - ZEN Conceptual Title
Devilfish vs. Necromancer
Halloween Knight (c) vs. Lone Shark - ZEN Master Title

Card up Wednesday-Thursday. Sorry for the slower updates, I've got exams, interviews and various other commitments all screaming at me simultaneously. Remember to predict for the lovely prize, a creative choice at a pivotal point in the current storyline, to be awarded after just one more event!

[Jaded]

Milton Hittlespitz vs. Jester
Cyanide vs. American Nightmare
The Sky Kings (Vertigo and Super Zero) (c) vs. X-War (X-Calibre and Man O'War) - ZEN Harmony Titles
Shaolin (c) vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon - ZEN Conceptual Title
Devilfish vs. Necromancer
Halloween Knight (c) vs. Lone Shark - ZEN Master Title

[1PWfan]

Man, can't believe I missed the last couple of shows (stupid University making me miss stuff). Here's my predictions:

Milton Hittlespitz vs. Jester
Probably stupid of me, since every logical instinct is telling me to pick Jester, but I like Milton and I think he's got more upside

Cyanide vs. American Nightmare
Cyanide's involved in the big storyline of the promotion, whilst Nightmare's just kind of there.

The Sky Kings (Vertigo and Super Zero) (c) vs. X-War (X-Calibre and Man O'War) - ZEN Harmony Titles
Neither team's really stood out thus far, so instinct tells me that you're unlikely to switch the title just yet

Shaolin (c) vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon - ZEN Conceptual Title
Via shenanigans as F.E.A.R interfere, costing Shaolin his title and giving one of my personal favourite character a chance to step up

Devilfish vs. Necromancer
To balance out the main event, where...

Halloween Knight (c) vs. Lone Shark - ZEN Master Title
...the Knight goes over. I mean, c'mon, he's just about the best you've got

[Rathen4]

Very sorry for not predicting. In future, if you were to PM me when a prediction card goes up, it would make sure I appear.

--

Milton Hittlespitz vs. Jester - I think this one opening could be a mistake as it's going to rate very low. Hittlespitz is made for ZEN, so I'm hoping a push is coming.

Cyanide vs. American Nightmare - You're jobbing yourself out. A leaf out of the old Inferno book!
The Sky Kings (Vertigo and Super Zero) (c) vs. X-War (X-Calibre and Man O'War) - ZEN Harmony Titles - I really want to see the belt on X-Calibre.
Shaolin (c) vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon - ZEN Conceptual Title - I don't think he will take it, but I want John Gordon to take it as there really is nothing that thrills me about Shaolin.
Devilfish vs. Necromancer - I can't get into either of these guys, so I'm hoping Necro takes it but then gets stomped by the rest of the Experience and sets up something fun.
Halloween Knight (c) vs. Lone Shark - ZEN Master Title - Knight is the boss, the best guy in the promotion, and I really can't see why you'd take it off him.

Keep it up!

[Zergon]

Milton Hittlespitz vs. Jester
Jester gets a win after losing to Jimmy in last show

Cyanide vs. American Nightmare
Both guys need a win but since Nightmare have jobbed midcarders he isn´t getting one over Cyanide here.

The Sky Kings (Vertigo and Super Zero) (c) vs. X-War (X-Calibre and Man O'War) - ZEN Harmony Titles
No need to change the beld owners yet

Shaolin (c) vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon - ZEN Conceptual Title
same

Devilfish vs. Necromancer
I think Necromancer needs the win more

Halloween Knight (c) vs. Lone Shark - ZEN Master Title
I still go with the champ

[Timber]

EN Way of the Philosopher 2010
Milton Hittlespitz vs. Jester
Cyanide vs. American Nightmare
The Sky Kings (Vertigo and Super Zero) (c) vs. X-War (X-Calibre and Man O'War) - ZEN Harmony Titles
Shaolin (c) vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon - ZEN Conceptual Title
Devilfish vs. Necromancer
Halloween Knight (c) vs. Lone Shark - ZEN Master Title

[Jingo]

Milton Hittlespitz vs. Jester
Cyanide vs. American Nightmare
The Sky Kings (Vertigo and Super Zero) (c) vs. X-War (X-Calibre and Man O'War) - ZEN Harmony Titles
Shaolin (c) vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon - ZEN Conceptual Title
Devilfish vs. Necromancer
Halloween Knight (c) vs. Lone Shark - ZEN Master Title

[TheKenwyne]

Pre show, we had a backstage incident, and sadly it wasn’t the zany, happy sort of backstage shenanigans that I like to have here at ZEN. Vertigo decided to attack Quick Silver – verbally – and the lower midcarder was upset – very upset. He had to be restrained by Super Zero and Molly Cuddle – who stopped canoodling just long enough to haul the duo apart. Vertigo had to have a little trip to my office. I read him a clause from his contract that he had violated, and told him in no uncertain terms not to do it again, firmly rather than angrily. He shrugged, grunting in reply. I turned my back briefly, but caught him flicking me off over my shoulder. I sent him out, seething. The impudent git. I’ll teach him to flick off the booker…

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ZEN.jpg
ZEN Way of the Philosopher
Held at the ZEN Temple in front of 85 people

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Jester.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MiltonHittlespitz.jpg
Jester vs. Milton Hittlespitz

Yeah, I matched these two up because they are both hardcore high flyers. What could possibly go wrong? Only… ooh, everything? This was guff. But still, the underlying talent prevented it from being too guffy. Hittlespitz’s lethal Knee Drop offthe top rope sealed the win after eight painful minutes.

Result: Milton Hittlespitz defeated Jester in 7:42 by pinfall with a Flying Knee Drop.
Rating: E+
Notes: Well done announcers, crowd disliked it.

***

Alex Arturro hopped into the ring, smug grin on his face.
“Shut it, fools!” he opened, to the crowd.
“Now, for those of you who weren’t here last month, you missed my boys destroying that pathetic excuse of a group called F.E.A.R.. This means that I get to book the main event this month… so, let’s see…” Arturro pretended to think, smiling wanly at the crowd.
“Halloween Knight, get yo’ ass down here!” Boos rang out around the arena as the company’s top heel slithered down to the ring.
“At the end of tonight, yo’ gonna be facing down with Lone Shark fo’ the ZEN Master title.” Knight nodded, unimpressed.
“During this match, all wrestlers will be banned from ringside. And just to make sure that no-one gets through to the ring, should anyone attack either wrestler, then the title will be vacated, and neither wrestler will have it.” Knight shifted uncomfortably under his mask. Arturro leered into his face.
“You ready to lose yo’ gold, fool?” he whispered, nastily. Knight snapped and tried to grab Arturro, but the colour man ducked the hold and rolled from the ring, running to the announce table. Knight followed, but Arturro waved his pimp cane threateningly, and Sparky Sparks joined him, armed with a steel chair. Knight leered at them, before quitting the ring, defeated.

Rating: E+

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/AmericanNightmare.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Cyanide.jpg
American Nightmare vs. Cyanide

It’s no secret I’m jobbing myself out, but this, paired with a gimmick change for Cyanide, has got my opponent and myself massively over. I didn’t mean for it to happen… it just did. It was a good match which the crowd enjoyed, and Cyanide won by his vicious Skull Splitter finisher.

Result: Cyanide defeated American Nightmare in 7:36 by pinfall with a Skull Splitter.
Rating: D+
Notes: Cyanide’s new gimmick scores a B. YES!

***

The theme from Captain Pugwash hit and Man O’War made his way to the ring, to a loud pop. Eeeveryone loves the comedy pirate routine.
“Yarr! Welcome to ZEN, me hearties! My name’s Man O’War, and I’m the greatest seafarer ever to grace the shores of this noble promotion. And all ye lucky land lubbers will get to witness my genius brand of ring-sailing when myself and my good friend X-Calib-yarr challenge for the Conceptual titles. Next time ye see me, I’m sure I’ll have me buried treas-arr.” A voice spoke over the arena tannoy.
“And now, for the translation…”

Rating: D-

***

The big screen lit up, with the cameras in the ZEN dressing room. Super Zero was shown, from the back, slipping his mask on. He turned, and was knocked to the ground by another masked man.
“What were you doing last month man? You cost me that fricking match!” Super Zero gazed balefully upwards at Vertigo, while Molly Cuddle came hairing in an attempt to break the duo up.
“Break it up you guys, you’ve got a match soon, you can’t fight now…” Super Zero silenced her with a slice of his hand. He squared up to Vertigo and… offered him his hand. Vertigo spat in Zero’s face. Zero shook his head, apparently disappointed. The screen flickered off.

Rating: E

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Vertigo.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/SuperZero.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ManOWar.jpg
Sky Kings (c) vs. X-War for the ZEN Harmony Titles.

Even to the most casual observer, it was clear things weren’t right between Vertigo and Super Zero, what with the two grabbing cheeky tags behind each other’s back and distracting each other almost as much as the enemy. Meanwhile, X-War were clicking perfectly, with Man O’War adding a yar-harr! after every big move hit. It came as no surprise to no-one when X-Calibre hit a big Springboard 460 for the pin on Vertigo, who was distracted at the vital moment by the a pie splattering sound effect playing over the PA. Man O’War celebrated enthusiastically with his gold, while X-Calibre, ever the laid back ‘dude’, leant lazily against the ropes with his belt over his shoulder.

Result: X-War defeated The Sky Kings in 11:31 when X-Calibre defeated Vertigo by pinfall with a Springboard 460.
Rating: D (Best… Tag Match… Ever!)
Notes: None.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Shaolin.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MirrorUniverseJonGordon.jpg
Shaolin (c) vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon for the ZEN Conceptual title.

Gordon was well on top throughout, but Shaolin’s ninja skillz lead to him finding a way to hang on in there. When Guru Vishni, at ringside, got bored of his protégée’s failure to finish his foe, he entered the ring and broke his Hindi cane over Shaolin’s masked head. Unfortunately for the baddies, Yale had trained himself to recognize the sound of cheating, and called for the bell the minute the snap of the cane was heard. Gordon looked like he was about to tear his manager to shreds, as Vishni bailed to the back.

Result: Shaolin defeated Mirror Universe John Gordon in 9:56 by disqualification.
Rating: E (I blame MUJG)
Notes: The bout dragged, despite the good commentary. Vishni helped out at ringside, but the crowd disliked the match.

***

The commentators began to hype the next match before Sparks’ earpiece buzzed into life.
“Hang on folks, it appears something is going down backstage.” The big screen flicked on, and showed Devilfish and Loneshark engaged in a bitter brawl with F.E.A.R.
“That fool! He’s pathetic!” screamed Arturro, who leapt from the announce table to rush to his ch/arge’s aid, but was stopped by the hulking figure of Massacre appearing on the ramp. The screen, meanwhile, showed Shaolin joining to even the sides, and F.E.A.R. retreating, subdued. Devilfish was shown holding his head as the screen switched off. Arturro celebrated, yelling various obscenities at the defeated F.E.A.R. as the lights darkened and Necromancer’s entrance music hit.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Necromancer.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Devilfish.jpg
Necromancer vs. Devilfish

Devilfish was obviously feeling worse for wear following the battle backstage, and it showed, with Necromancer dominating the match. Arturro muttered a lot about cheating before Necromancer secured the tap through a Death Scream.

Results: Necromancer defeated Devilfish in 11:24 by submission with a Death Scream.
Rating: E (Big, big disappointment. I expect better from two guys rated this highly.)
Notes: This dragged in the middle, and the crowd hated it, despite the good commentary. Devilfish is improving in Rumble skills.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/HalloweenKnight.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/LoneShark.jpg
Halloween Knight (c) vs. Lone Shark for the ZEN Master title.
Unlike the match before, neither of these men appeared damage by their backstage shenanigans, and it was a superbly paced, even, flowing contest. The end came when Halloween Knight locked on the Pumpkin Patch that Shark struggled out of, hitting a back drop before springing off the ropes and nailing a huge clothesline, setting the champ up for a Blood In the Water. Knight hit the deck and Yale made the count, and ZEN have a new Master Champion.

Results: Lone Shark defeated Halloween Knight in 12:33 by pinfall with a Blood In The Water. Lone Shark wins the ZEN Master title.
Rating: D
Notes: Announcers did good.

Overall: D- (4/4…)

Post show:

Lone Shark was celebrating with the fans when the lights went out. The big screen lit up with a super close-up of someone’s face.
“One month to go. Enjoy it. We WILL have the last laugh.” The lights came up once more. And a distinctly worried Lone Shark continued to celebrate, rather subdued.

Prediction Results

One show to go, guys...

Jaded: 17/24 (71%)
Jingo: 12/18 (66%)
MaxxHexx: 8/12 (66%)
Rathen4: 4/6 (66%)
1PW Fan: 7/12 (58%)
Zergon: 10/18 (55%)
Timber: 5/12 (42%)
Huntman: 2/6 (33%)
Kainlock: 4/6 (66%)
Flat_doughnut: 4/6 (66%)

Jaded leads... leaderboard rearranged by percentages. Most picks made is tiebreak.

Next: Monthly recap, a ma-hoosive signing, and next month's card. Comments welcome!

[TheKenwyne]

April 2010 Recap

ZEN News

Remember that ma-hoosive signing I mentioned?

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/MondayNext.jpg

Here he is!

For some reason best known to RAW, they released their most talented wrestler by miles, Monday Next. I was perfectly happy to snap him up at a relatively bargain basement price, and now we have another big heel. He's already over here, thanks to RAW's TV show, and once he's established some momentum he'll be a certified title threat. Apart from that, nothing else happened that I'm telling you about. Yet.

Australian Wrestling News

APW held BeachFront Breakdown infront of... come on, guess... YES!, a Sell Out crowd at Fuster Hall! It gained a C- rating, with Swoop McCarthy man of the match. Nathan Mckenzie, Sean Quartermaine and Lanny Williams all signed contract extensions.

DIW held 'Ring Kings' which got a D rating in front of 167 people at Marv's Sports Centre. The Comedian was MVP.

RAW's TV show gained two Ds and two D+s, while Stars of Raw got a D infront of a sell out 2,000 people at JDM Arena. The show's hero was Captain Wrestling II. Dazzler and Rebecca Richley signed contract extensions.

World Wrestling News

EX2010 opened, founded by Japanese career journeyman Kuemon Hotta. No wrestlers announced, the promotion starts at Small.

PGHW signed Bryan Holmes as their Head Booker. He's yet to book a show, but the Canadian vet definetly has the business knowledge to do well.

Mexican legend Mephisto left the business this month after a career spanning 40 years, and Principessa quit active competition.

ZEN Way of the Poet 2010
Monday Next vs. American Nightmare
??? vs. The Horror Show
Shaolin (c) vs. Necromancer (ZEN Conceptual Title)
The Enemy vs. X-War (ZEN Harmony Titles)
??? vs. Devilfish
Lone Shark (c) vs. Halloween Knight (ZEN Master Title)

Card Fridayish. Last show before prediction prize!

[Jingo]

ZEN Way of the Poet 2010
Monday Next vs. American Nightmare
??? vs. The Horror Show
Shaolin (c) vs. Necromancer (ZEN Conceptual Title)
The Enemy vs. X-War (ZEN Harmony Titles)
??? vs. Devilfish
Lone Shark (c) vs. Halloween Knight (ZEN Master Title)

[Zergon]

Monday Next vs. American Nightmare
mr.Nightmare continues to job other

??? vs. The Horror Show
one rule I learned quickly in these board is always predict the mystery men´s

Shaolin (c) vs. Necromancer (ZEN Conceptual Title)
Normally I say Necromancer but I thing he´s too big name to hold midcard title so a draw with maybe a run in from the new stable?

The Enemy vs. X-War (ZEN Harmony Titles)
X-War just won the titles so they aren´t dropping them already

??? vs. Devilfish
Mystery man!

Lone Shark (c) vs. Halloween Knight (ZEN Master Title)
Shark isn´t losing his first title defence

[Timber]

ZEN Way of the Poet 2010
Monday Next vs. American Nightmare
??? vs. The Horror Show
Shaolin (c) vs. Necromancer (ZEN Conceptual Title)
The Enemy vs. X-War (ZEN Harmony Titles)
??? vs. Devilfish
Lone Shark (c) vs. Halloween Knight (ZEN Master Title)

[Jaded]

Monday Next vs. American Nightmare
??? vs. The Horror Show
Shaolin (c) vs. Necromancer (ZEN Conceptual Title)
The Enemy vs. X-War (ZEN Harmony Titles)
??? vs. Devilfish
Lone Shark (c) vs. Halloween Knight (ZEN Master Title)

[EWBSDM]

RAW released their most talented wrestler by miles, Monday Next.

...I'm sort of at a loss as to why they would do that. That seems somewhat... idiotic of them.

PGHW signed Bryan Holmes as their Head Booker. He's yet to book a show, but the Canadian vet definetly has the business knowledge to do well.

I've never played a game where, six months down the line, Bryan Holmes is in Japan. Your dynasty might be the first time I see him stick around overseas.

Anyways, loving the ZEN goodness. Keep up the good work senator.

[Rathen4]

Monday Next vs. American Nightmare
??? vs. The Horror Show
Shaolin (c) vs. Necromancer (ZEN Conceptual Title)
The Enemy vs. X-War (ZEN Harmony Titles)
??? vs. Devilfish
Lone Shark (c) vs. Halloween Knight (ZEN Master Title)

[Ranson]

Monday Next vs. American Nightmare
??? vs. The Horror Show
Shaolin (c) vs. Necromancer (ZEN Conceptual Title)
The Enemy vs. X-War (ZEN Harmony Titles)
??? vs. Devilfish

Lone Shark (c) vs. Halloween Knight (ZEN Master Title)

By DQ, or some other cheap method. No title change.

[The Real Jack Avatar]

Wow, you GDS guys are quick! I don't know how you found out about my booking of ZEN (I thought I had kept it pretty well underwraps), but looks like you've hit the mark.

I'll be looking forward to seeing how you interpret the escapades which should be coming up soon, iirc. ZEN is one heck of a wacky crew (and New Zealand is just as much of a wacky country!), so this dynasty should be a wild ride

[MaxxHexx]

Monday Next vs. American Nightmare
??? vs. The Horror Show
Shaolin (c) vs. Necromancer (ZEN Conceptual Title)
The Enemy vs. X-War (ZEN Harmony Titles)
??? vs. Devilfish
Lone Shark (c) vs. Halloween Knight (ZEN Master Title)

[TheKenwyne]

More backstage shizzle to inform you of this month. First off, Molly Cuddle decided to do impressions. I told her they were lovely. They weren’t. It still got a laugh out of the locker room because of how bad they were. In slightly less happy news, Vertigo has continued to get up the noses of, ooh, just the entire locker room following his bust up with Quick Silver last month. Paul Massey sidled up to me and told me to have a word with him. Having tried the softly-softly approach, this time I blew my stack. After ranting at him for the best part of ten minutes, I stopped and hoped that he’d look impressed.
“This is a waste of my time. This is pathetic,” he said, as he swaggered out of the locker room. One more time, Vertigo, try me. One more time.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ZEN.jpg
ZEN Way of the Poet
Held at the ZEN Temple in front of 88 people

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/AmericanNightmare.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MondayNext.jpg
American Nightmare vs. Monday Next

MN is a class wrestler. I’m told I’m quite good, too. So it bothers me that this match wasn’t great, but good. We just didn’t click, and it showed. But it was still entertaining enough, with Monday scoring the pin following a Flash Forward.

Result: Monday Next defeated American Nightmare in 12:23 by pinfall.
Rating: D
Notes: No chemistry between us, whatsoever. :(. The commentators did well, as expected, really, now.

***

After Monday and I trooped to the back, the lights went off. Adagio for Strings (Angus Dei) started to play, with smoke filling the arena.
“We’ve been waiting… and now… we will have… the LAST LAGUH!” The last words by accompanied by maniacal laughter, and the sound cut to Muse’s Knights of Cydonia. Out to the ring came a group of five men, heads down, hoods on their long trench coats up. The crowd booed lustily as this group, now clearly presented as ‘baddies’. They stopped in the ring. The main riff from Muse’s famous song continued to go round and round, plodding, repetitive. The lighting rig flashed, almost strobe fast. The sound dipped as the man at the point of the group stepped forward, throwing his hood back and the coat off, revealing a snappy business suit and the face of…
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MacGuffin.jpg
…The Cutthroat Consultant, Mac Guffin!
“Yes, it is I, master businessman, tycoon extraordinaire Mac Guffin! And I am now the proud owner of Last Laugh Incorporated. We want to promoted…” A robotic voice spoke over the PA…
“Generic Sports Entertainment.” Mac Guffin picked up where he’d left off, not missing a beat.
… and we need a base. So I looked around and I saw a little promotion that dared, that was impudent enough to be different! And so, here I am, to force this abomination to return to the healthy norm, and absorb it into Last Laugh Inc. But I couldn’t do it alone, oh no. Allow me to announce my shareholders…” man in the middle of the diamond stepped forward and dropped his trenchcoat…
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MauriceJackson.jpg
“First, my good friend from the Mean Streets of Melbourne, Maurice Jackson!” The duo that made up the two corners of the diamond stepped forward, removing their trenchcoats…
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/RodSullivan.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Seeker.jpg
“And now, my tag team from Business heaven, The Pernickety Priest, Seeker, and ‘The Outbacker’ Rod Sullivan!” As the final man stepped forward and prepared to remove his hood, Guffin began to speak.
“For my final man, I knew that I’d need someone with inside knowledge of ZEN, or, should I say, Last Laugh Promotions, so I asked around, and well, I think I got quite the catch.” The last man removed his hood.
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/JimmyStratosphere.jpg
“Ladies and gentleman, The Thrill Seeker, Jimmy Stratosphere!” Boos rang out across the arena as the formerly popular wrestler was unveiled. He smiled, giving the crowd a two fingered salute before stepping back in line with the rest of his stable. Guffin smiled at the boos, before speaking once more.
“Mark my words, ZEN, soon, you will have new champions, new gods. And mark my words, we WILL have the Last Laugh.”
The manic laughter sounded and Knights of Cydonia ramped up a couple of notches as Last Laugh Inc. left the ring.

Rating: E+

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/RodSullivan.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Seeker.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/NightmareSlasher.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/NightmareStalker.jpg
See No Evil vs. The Horror Show

Sullivan and Seeker joined the Horror Show for their first match in for ZEN together. The new duo were clearly meant to be put over to give their stable the momentum, and indeed they did, dominating the lesser team before nailing them with team finisher The Last Laugh for the fall.

Result: See No Evil defeated The Horror Show in 8:25 when Seeker defeated Nightmare Stalker by pinfall
Rating: E (not bad considering no-one had heard of Seeker before this)
Notes: Nightmare Stalker was off his game, and considering he usually carries his team that’s a bad thing. The commentary did well, and Nightmare Slasher is getting better at Performance.

***

A short video played, informing the crowd that Halloween Knight will cash that predictably present rematch clause later tonight for the ZEN Master Title.
Rating: E

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Shaolin.jpg vs.
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Necromancer.jpg
Shaolin (c) vs. Necromancer for the ZEN Conceptual title.

Necromancer was up for this; clearly wanting to get F.E.A.R. some gold after the group had lost the main strap last month. He dominated the early part of the match with some stellar high flying, before Shaolin grounded him and began to get back into it, working him over with methodical ground work. However, it would be Last Laugh Inc, who, well, had the Last Laugh, as Maurice Jackson came steaming in from the back and laid Shaolin out with a big chair shot. Necromancer raced in for the cover, but Jackson stood in the way. He offered Necromancer his hand. The Monochrome Menace took it, warily, and Jackson instantly hit a Rolling DDT, leaving both of the original combatants out for the count. Jackson flicked off the crowd, before rolling from the ring and making for the back. Yale stood, looking blindly straight ahead.
“What happened to the fighting?”

Result: Shaolin drew with Necromancer in 8:32 following a double disqualification
Rating: E+
Notes: This dragged in the middle, and annoyed the crowd thusly. Announcers did good, as usual.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ManOWar.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Cyanide.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Massacre.jpg
X-War (c) vs. The Enemy for the ZEN Harmony Titles

This time F.E.A.R. didn’t stand a chance; X-War, who don’t have any alignment in the confusing network of alliances in ZEN, dominated the match throughout – complete with Man O’War’s frequent yarr-harr’s. It was War who scored the fall, following a Neptune’s Trident, which is a posh name for a Spear.

Result: X-War defeated The Enemy in 13:02 when Man O' War defeated Cyanide by pinfall
Rating: D- (X-War are tag gods, they are really, really good at this getting high ratings nonsense.)
Notes: … and that’s with Calibre off his game. The announcers did good, the crowd hated it.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/JimmyStratosphere.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Devilfish.jpg
Jimmy Stratosphere vs. Devilfish

It was a good match, but the ending was never in doubt. Devilfish was outpaced and outmuscled by the bigger man, who eventually ended the poor guy’s suffering with a Frog Splash for the pin.

Result: Jimmy Stratosphere defeated Devilfish in 11:02 by pinfall
Rating: D-
Notes: Commentators did good, crowd disliked. What do I have to do to get a good rating from the crowd these days?

***

We cut to backstage, where X-Calibre and Man O’War were ready with a few choice words.
“Yo, dudes. X-Calibre here, with his partner Man O’War”
“Yarr-harr!”
“And I’m here to tell you all that this is just the beginning for X-War. These straps are the first of many we’ll have over our shoulders. I’ll be a ZEN Master, the first man to complete the triple crown, and Man O’War, here, well, he’s always wanted to have that awesome Concept of a Title. Even if he can’t bury that like the rest of his treasure.”
“Narr-harr. Treas-arr.”
“We don’t care for this crazy shiz with FEAR, Last Laughs, Experience. We don’t need that. We’re just a pair of cool guys who like the weight of gold round our waists. We don’t need no crazy shiz for that. Just good, honest hard work. Or, in my case, good, honest laziness. Peace out, guys. You’ll be seeing us again soon. With a whole lot more bang for your buck.”

Rating: D+ (good at tag matches and promos, eh?)

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/HalloweenKnight.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/LoneShark.jpg
Halloween Knight (c) vs. Lone Shark for the ZEN Master title.

This was a re-run of last month’s match, with the same high intensity, work ethic and skills on show by both wrestlers. Ten minutes in, with both wrestlers tired, breathing hard and staring each other down, Knights of Cydonia hit, and Jimmy Stratosphere, Maurice Jackson and Mac Guffin sauntered down to the ring armed with various weapons. The duo in the ring turned about, outnumbered. Last Laugh shared glances and nodded, before Jackson and Stratosphere slid into the ring, aiming chairshots at both competitors. Both ZEN originals ducked, but both ate kicks to the gut as they spun around to face their tormentors. Before Last Laugh could press their advantage, Alex Arturro hared into the ring, fending both their opponents off with a swing of his pimp cane. Devilfish raced from the back and tackled Mac Guffin, laying on the boots to the grounded consultant. Jackson bailed from the ring to his bosses’ aid, only to be clotheslined by Necromancer as entered from the crowd. Devilfish left the battered Mac Guffin alone and turned his attention to his nemesis, and, with an insane chuckle, he charged in, engaging in a wicked brawl with the Monochrome Menace. In ring, Halloween Knight had laid out Arturro and was now engaged in a three-way showdown with Lone Shark and Stratosphere, which was very, very even. Cyanide joined the fray, racing from the back and hitting the Skull Splitter on the recovering Mac Guffin before Maurice Jackson hit him with a chairshot from behind. Cyanide sprung to his feet and hit an improvised suplex. The entire arena had degenerated into an old-fashioned barney.

Result: Lone Shark drew with Halloween Knight in 14:28 when the match descended into chaos after Devilfish, Shaolin, The Alex Arturro Experience, Cyanide, Necromancer, Mac Guffin, Jimmy Stratosphere and Maurice Jackson all became involved.
Rating: D
Notes: None

***

With the arena in chaos, it took some time before the big screen flickered into light, Sparky Sparks front and centre.
“Stop it! Stop it, I say!” Sparks was ignored by the brawling combatants. He pressed a button that sent a loud wave of feedback over the sound system. All the fighters stopped instantly, holding their ears and turning to the screen.
“Are you all comfortable?” Sparks asked, butter-wouldn’t-melt style.
“Good, then I’ll begin. Now I speak for the majority of the ZEN roster when I say I am sick of these shameless actions. This is ZEN, not SW-frickin’-F! So, to stop this lawless crap happening, I’m booking next month’s main event, right now, for Way of the Jester. This match will be a three way trios match, lucha elimination rules. Each faction will select a team and the leader of the last team standing will become ZEN commissioner for the next 12months. That man will be in complete control of matchmaking, of hirings and firings, and the day-to-day running of the company. That man will be a ZEN god. That man will be able to control this company. Choose your teams wisely. Next month, there can only be one winner.” The screen blinked off. The combatants did not restart brawling. They sized each other up, knowing that next month, one of them would have a definite advantage over the others.

Rating: E+

Overall: D- (My perfect record continues…)

Predictions

Jaded: 20/30 (66%) (CONGRATULATIONS! Your creative choice is coming your way via PM.)
Jingo: 12/18 (66%)
Ranson: 4/6 (66%)
MaxxHexx: 11/18 (61%)
Rathen4: 7/12 (58%)
1PW Fan: 7/12 (58%)
Zergon: 10/18 (55%)
Timber: 8/18 (44%)
Huntman: 2/6 (33%)

Next card hopefully will be up over the weekend. Predictions tomorrow, for sure. The running prediction tally will be STARTED ANEW next show. I will ask Jaded NOT to predict the main event, as, well, he will ruin the ending if he does.

[TheKenwyne]

May 2010 Recap

ZEN News

C-W-A and Man O'War both signed contract extensions. Vertigo moped around and is steadily turning the whole locker room against him. I think he will become unemployed if he mucks around anymore. Try me, Artist of the Airways, try me.

Australian News

APW held Caged Showdown 2010 at a sold out JDM Arena. The show got a C+ with Swoop McCarthy MVP. Debonair David Peterson and Mitch Y. Bryson received contract renewals.

DIW Surrender or Die went down in front of 179 at Marv's Sport Centre. It got a D, with Dumfrey Pinn putting in performance of the night.

RAW's TV show got one D and three D+s. Stars of RAW took place at a soldout JDM Arena, also getting a D+, with Autumn Gleason (sigh) putting in segment of the night. Montgomery Croft and Heath Murdoch renewed their contracts.

Miscellanous News

Sad news this month as CGC star Rhino Umaga passed away at 31 following a nasty incident with some javelins. Poor guy.

NYCW and WLW both rose in size; NYCW to Regional and WLW to Cult.

Sensational Ogiwara has been made head booker of new promotion EX2010. Congratulations, I guess, though the talent he has to work with is mediocre and worse.

Three injuries this month: Harrison Hash is out for 3 months after damaging his shoulder, Kiko Sakikabara for a month with an ankle injury and Chojiro Kitoaji for two months with arm damage.

Sadaharu Jimbo, left the business, leaving his promotion PGHW to his son Seijo, who stated he wanted it to become a product everyone could enjoy. Que angry PGHW marks taking to the streets.

Alex Braun and Nene Ebina have announced retirments from active competition. They'll both stay involved in the business though, Braun with various backstage work with PSW and Ebina with her new Dojo, orignally named Nene Ebina Dojo.

ZEN Way of the Jester 2010
Due to technical difficulties (TEW 2010 dosen't allow three way trios matches) the main event has been changed to a Battle Royal, featuring F.E.A.R., Last Laugh Inc, The Experience and a mystery entrant.

American Nightmare vs. Milton Hittlespitz
Quick Silver vs. Maurice Jackson
Vertigo vs. Super Zero vs. C-W-A
X-War (c) vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony Titles
10 Man Team Battle Royal featuring members of F.E.A.R., Last Laugh Incorporated, The Experience and a Mystery Entrant.
Bonus point: Who will the MYSTERY ENTRANT be?

Jaded, don't predict that 10 man battle royal, there's a good chap. These predictions go to the next big prize, which will be dolled out in the Game Winter.

Card up Sunday, or possibly late tonight. You never know.

[Rathen4]

American Nightmare vs. Milton Hittlespitz
Quick Silver vs. Maurice Jackson
Vertigo vs. Super Zero vs. C-W-A
X-Way (c) vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony Titles
10 Man Team Battle Royal featuring members of F.E.A.R., Last Laugh Incorporated, The Experience and a Mystery Entrant.

Bonus point: Who will the MYSTERY ENTRANT be? - Who could you have pinched.. could be Swoop. I'll go for him.

[Ranson]

American Nightmare vs. Milton Hittlespitz
Quick Silver vs. Maurice Jackson
Vertigo vs. Super Zero vs. C-W-A
X-Way (c) vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony Titles
10 Man Team Battle Royal featuring members of F.E.A.R., Last Laugh Incorporated, The Experience and a Mystery Entrant -- Jimmy Stratosphere

Bonus point: A. Nightmare steps into the ring for the second time that night

[Jingo]

American Nightmare vs. Milton Hittlespitz
Quick Silver vs. Maurice Jackson
Vertigo vs. Super Zero vs. C-W-A
X-War (c) vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony Titles
10 Man Team Battle Royal featuring members of F.E.A.R., Last Laugh Incorporated, The Experience and a Mystery Entrant. - Seeker
Bonus point: Who will the MYSTERY ENTRANT be? Fuzzy Freeman

[Jaded]

American Nightmare vs. Milton Hittlespitz
Quick Silver vs. Maurice Jackson
Vertigo vs. Super Zero vs. C-W-A
X-Way (c) vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony Titles

And that's me done, for obvious reasons... :D

[Zergon]

American Nightmare vs. Milton Hittlespitz
Even though your user character will mainly job others he needs to get a win here and there in order to be respectable threat to others

Quick Silver vs. Maurice Jackson
Jackson is simply better

Vertigo vs. Super Zero vs. C-W-A
Vertigo and Super Zero will cancel each others out

X-War (c) vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony Titles
Too early for X-War to drop those belts

10 Man Team Battle Royal featuring members of F.E.A.R., Last Laugh Incorporated, The Experience and a Mystery Entrant.
I go with Lone Shark winning this one

Bonus point: Who will the MYSTERY ENTRANT be?
Since your original plan was trio three way match I think it´s someone who we already know. Lets say it´s Mirror Universe Jon Gordon:D.

[Ranson]

[B]
Bonus point: Who will the MYSTERY ENTRANT be?
Since your original plan was trio three way match I think it´s someone who we already know. Lets say it´s Mirror Universe Jon Gordon:D.

See, that was my first thought, but I figured he was too low on the card.

[TheKenwyne]

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ZEN.jpg
ZEN Way of the Jester
Held at the ZEN Temple in front of 152 people

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/AmericanNightmare.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MiltonHittlespitz.jpg
American Nightmare vs. Milton Hittlespitz

Good opener here in terms of quality, as in Milton is surprisingly good in ring for a weapons based brawler. He can fly and rumble with the best of them here in Oz, and it was nice to do a match where I didn’t have to carry the entire fight. It ended via Hittlespitz’s trademark Flying Knee Drop.

Result: Milton Hittlespitz defeated American Nightmare in 7:03 by pinfall
Rating: D

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MauriceJackson.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/QuickSilver.jpg
Maurice Jackson vs. Quick Silver

Maurice is a fantastically talented individual willing to work for pittance, but I do have a slight worry that he doesn’t really fit the whole ZEN product as a wrestler. As a personality, fine, but as a wrestler? Nuh-uh. His brawling needs him to be matched up with Jester, Hittlespitz or Massacre, but I couldn’t spare any of those guys tonight so he got to dominate poor little Quick Silver. The finish came inside five minutes with a Rolling DDT.

Result: Maurice Jackson defeated Quick Silver in 4:57 by pinfall with a Rolling DDT.
Rating: E- (good job cooling the crowd off, guys)
Notes: Announcers did good, the crowd hated it.

***

Backstage, and things were still heated in the Sky Kings’ lockeroom. Molly Cuddle looked decidedly awkward as she sat between Vertigo and Super Zero. Vertigo especially looked grumpy, though you wouldn’t know what Super Zero’s face looked like since, well, he’s the Expressionless Wonder.
“Can’t you forgive him, honey?” asked Cuddle, obviously tired.
“Why should I forgive him? He cost us our titles, he cost me my match with that damnable clown, he cost us our reputations!” Super Zero stared balefully at Vertigo. Vertigo took offence and stood up, the duo once again squaring up to each other. Cuddle forced herself in between them, and they stepped back reluctantly, eyes still locked together.
“Is this the end of The Sky Kings, folks?” Sparks pondered.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Vertigo.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/SuperZero.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/CWA.jpg
Vertigo vs. Super Zero vs. C-W-A

The Sky Kings clearly weren’t on speaking terms, as both ignored the clown and went straight for each other, locking up from the bell. Vertigo started well, using his larger size and better technical skills to hit a Suplex followed by a Boston Crab that was broken up by C-W-A. However, aside from breaking pins and submission attempts, C-W-A stayed very much on the periphery of this one, leaving the tag team partners to duke it out. Vertigo finally floored his opponent with a lariat and hit the Radar Legdrop. He got Zero’s shoulder’s down but once again C-W-A pulled him away. Vertigo snapped and surged to his feet, going for a Spear, but C-W-A sidestepped and from somewhere produced a custard pie! Splat! Vertigo was down, and C-W-A dived for the cover. 1, 2, 3!

Result: C-W-A defeated Vertigo and Super Zero in 9:17 when C-W-A defeated Vertigo by pinfall after using a foreign object.
Rating: E+ (C-W-A can sorta wrestle, see?)
Notes: Commentary was awesome, crowd hated it.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ManOWar.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Jester.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Eraser.jpg
X-War (c) vs. The Mercs for the ZEN Harmony titles.

Basic tag championship squash match, with X-Calibre bossing the show and Man O’War providing support and yarr-harrs! aplenty. Calibre nailed Jester with the Springboard 460 for the pin.

Result: X-War defeated The Mercs in 11:59 when X-Calibre defeated Jester by pinfall.
Ratings: E+ (disappointing by X-War standards)
Notes: This matched dragged in the middle, the commentary did well and the crowd hated it. Oh, and X-Calibre’s improving in performance skills.

***

Sparky Sparks was shown backstage in a pre-taped segment.
“Ladies and gentlemen, we are just moments away from the main event of the evening which will see ZEN’s first ever commissioner decided. As you may have read on our website, this bout will not be the three way trios match but a ten man battle royal featuring a mystery entrant as well as three members from each of our three teams. Two men will start in the ring with another joining them periodically. The only way to be eliminated from this contest is by pinfall or submission.”
X-Calibre breezed past and sunk his hand into the ball bag that Sparks was holding. Sparks looked shocked.
“Look’s like I’m you’re mystery entrant, man,” X-Calibre drawled as he withdrew with a ball in hand and a furious looking Sparks in tow.

***

Ten Man Battle Royal for the ability to select ZEN Comissioner

The ring was empty, until the Jaws theme hit and Lone Shark ‘swam’ down to the ring, annoyed at having to enter first. At the announcers table, where Arturro and Sparks were joined by Mac Guffin, Arturro went ballistic, calling the match ‘pathetic’ and a ‘fix.’ Guffin smiled serenely. Necromancer’s music was next over the sound system and the Monochrome Menace made his way down to the ring. The duo stared down, and the bell rang.

In ring:
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/LoneShark.jpg and http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Necromancer.jpg

F.E.A.R. and The Experience start in the ring, and the two lock up instantly. They don’t stay tied up long, soon both men are bouncing off the ropes. Necromancer nailed Lone Shark with a big drop kick for the two count, but on their feet Shark hit a Northern Lights suplex, leading to his own near fall. They continued to duel as ‘Business Time’ by Flight of the Conchords hit.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg

“It’s the mystery entrant, entering at number 3, X-Calibre!” Sparks exclaimed as Calibre slid into the ring. He waited for Necromancer and Lone Shark to finish their exchange before the three entered into a three-way staredown. Lone Shark and Calibre exchanged glances and touched fists, before hitting Necromancer with a double clothesline. Calibre got him up, and Shark hit Blood in the Water, followed by X-Calibre’s Spingboard 460 for the three count. (Elimination 1: Necromancer)

Calibre and Lone Shark stared down as Necromancer exited stage left. Once again Calibre offered his hand, but this time Shark shook his head and used an Arm Drag to bring Calibre to the floor. As he began to work the Springboard Machine’s arms, Knights of Cydonia hit for the first time that night, and the next entrant made his way to the ring.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Seeker.jpg

“Excellent! Last Laugh Inc.’s first entrant here, Seeker, coming in at number 4.” Guffin stated. Seeker flew into the ring and took down Calibre with a lethal Flying Crossbody. Shark retreated to the corner as Seeker Irish whipped Calibre over the top ropes, nailing a Senton as he followed Calibre to the outside. He worked the Springboard Machine over before throwing him back into the ring. Calibre staggered to his feet right into a Belly-to-Belly suplex from Shark! 1, 2, 3! (Elimination 2: X-Calibre) Seeker entered the ring behind him, and stared working over Shark’s body with punches and chops, but Shark hit a big dropkick leading to a pin, but Seeker was out in one. More music ripped the sound systems, and out came…

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/HalloweenKnight.jpg

“It’s former two time ZEN Master champion, and leader of F.E.A.R. Halloween Knight, entering at number five!” Sparks with the intro. Halloween Knight wasted no time making his way to the ring, and hit a neckbreaker straight away on a surprised Seeker, leaving Shark open, and the two of them went for it. No hold barred, Shark and Knight tearing at each other with strikes, and occasionally stopping for a grapple too. Seeker occasionally contributed a cheap shot, but largely kept out of harm’s way. Soon Knights of Cydonia hit again, and down to the ring came another member of Last Laugh Incorporated.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/RodSullivan.jpg

“Coming in at number six is Rod Sullivan, the other half of the See No Evil team with Seeker!” Mac Guffin was almost laughing as the duo stood together. They came across the ring and hit Spears at exactly the same time on both their opponents before going for the covers at the same time. Both Shark and Knight kicked out, but found themselves at a numerical disadvantage against the Last Laugh team. Knight and Shark caught each other’s eye, and nodded as if they’d agree something. The duo surged across the ring and hit simultaneous Dropkicks on See No Evil!
“Unbelievable! F.E.A.R. and The Experience form an impromptu team against Last Laugh! cried an exhilarated Sparks. The two sides brawled in the ring, until there was a chord on a mandolin, and the next entrant made his way to join the fight.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Shaolin.jpg

“And here comes another member of The Experience at number seven, Shaolin!” Suddenly the in ring demographic had changed Lone Shark came to stand beside Shaolin, leaving Knight alone. The four other men came to a consensus and converged upon F.E.A.R.’s leader, beating him down. He tapped the mat in pain and submission leaving the match. (Elimination 3: Halloween Knight) Once again Lone Shark and partner faced off with See No Evil, before the mournful sound of Linkin’ Park’s What I’ve Done hit the speakers.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Cyanide.jpg

“And the last member of F.E.A.R. entered into this contest reaches the ring, Cyanide, at number eight!
Cyanide raced to the ring and wasted no time going to work, Spearing both Sullivan and Seeker to the mat and clothes lining Shaolin to join them. Shark dodged the drop kick but Cyanide rolled out of the ring to prevent Shark from taking advantage. Ever the opportunist, Shark dived on the downed Seeker for a cheeky pinfall. (Elimination 4: Seeker) He tried the same on Sullivan, but he got his shoulder up and suplexed Shark over the top ropes, where he landed slap bang on top of Cyanide. As that duo writhed on the outside, Sullivan crawled over too the still down Shaolin and landed a huge Elbow Drop before covering to eliminated the Conceptual champion from the match. (Elimination 5: Shaolin) Sullivan taunted in the centre of the ring as he awaited either Cyanide or Shark to regain control of themselves. It was the sound of the Jaws theme hitting the speakers.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Devilfish.jpg

“Now you in trouble boy! It’s The Experience’s Devilfish, entering at number nine! Devilfish ignore the prone Lone Shark and Cyanide and charge straight for Sullivan, who bailed out of the ring rather than face down the wrathful ‘Fish. Fish taunted, laughing maniacally at the sky, but he didn’t spot Cyanide coming from behind! Schoolboy roll up with a handful of tights! 1, 2, 3! Devilfish was outta there! (Elimination 6: Devilfish) Lone Shark had recovered as well, but too late! The exhausted Shark locked up with Cyanide, and Sullivan re-entered the ring and joined the fray. Shark ended up on the wrong end of a double suplex into the mat, followed by a quick cover from Sullivan, but Shark got his shoulder up. Sullivan stood up, cursing, right into a Skull Splitter from Cyanide! He dived for the cover, 1, 2, shoulder! Cyanide stood, and looked ready to continue the offence, but Shark signalled for him to stand aside. Sullivan shakily regained his feet, only for Shark to set him up for a Blood in the Water! But before it landed Knights of Cydonia hit, and down came the last entrant.

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/JimmyStratosphere.jpg

“Perfect! It’s Jimmy Stratosphere for Last Laugh, the final entrant!” Mac Guffin was bouncing with glee as Stratosphere raced to the ring. Blood of the Water hit, bam! 1, 2, pin broken by Stratosphere! As Shark regained his feet he walked into the Skull Splitter from Cyanide! 1, 2, 3! Shark’s gone! (Elimination 7: Lone Shark) Cyanide really didn’t think it out carefully though, as he was left one on two with Stratosphere and Sullivan. Stratosphere kicked Cyanide in the gut, setting him up for Sullivan’s tag team finisher The Last Laugh that landed hard. 1, 2, 3! (Elimination 8: Cyanide) Last Laugh celebrated, before Sullivan lay down, inviting Stratosphere to pin him. 1, 2, 3! It’s all over, Last Laugh are the victors! (Elimination 9: Rod Sullivan)

Result: Jimmy Stratosphere won the battle royal in 28:47 following a pin fall over Rod Sullivan.
Key: Entrant Number/Elimination Number/Total Elimination (Eliminated by)
Lone Shark 1/7/3 (Cyanide)
Necromancer 2/1/0 (X-Calibre)
X-Calibre 3/2/1 (Lone Shark)
Seeker 4/4/1 (Lone Shark)
Halloween Knight 5/3/0 (See No Evil, Shaolin and Lone Shark)
Rod Sullivan 6/9/3 (Jimmy Stratosphere)
Shaolin 7/5/1 (Rod Sullivan)
Cyanide 8/8/2 (Jimmy Stratosphere and Rod Sullivan)
Devilfish 9/6/0 (Cyanide)
Jimmy Stratosphere 10/-/2 (Winner)
Rating: D-
Notes: X-Calibre was off his game, probably due to the match he wrestled earlier tonight. The commentators did well and the crowd disliked the match. Shaolin improved in Technical skills, Seeker in Performance skills.

***

Seeker rejoined his team-mates as they celebrated in the ring to Knights of Cydonia.

Rating: F (Not over enough for that, obviously)

***

Mac Guffin joined his charges as they celebrated in ring, a big smile over his face.
“Well, well, well, look who’s had the Last Laugh!” The whole group were nearly reduced to tears by that terrible joke.
“As my first act as Comissioner of ZEN, anyone who is a part of F.E.A.R. or The Experience is fired!” Boos rang out around the arena as Sparky Sparks got to his feet.
“Excuse me, sir, but that is not within your power. You may only fire active competitors who have broken company rules and none of these men have done so. The board would not except it!” cheers for Sparks who nodded, before sinking to his seat. A piqued Guffin continued.
“That may be the case, friends, but if you make one wrong move, you’ll be out of Last Laugh Promotions quicker than you can blink! In a move to make your removal from my glorious vision quicker, I am banning all groups of more than two people not approved by Last Laugh Incoporated. If you wish to get your group approved, you’ll have to prove that group deserve it… to me.” More boos, then silence as a slow smile spread across Guffin’s face, and he turned towards the announce table.
“Sparks? The rule you mentioned only concerns active compeitiors?” Booing ripped through the arena as they realised what Guffin planned to do. Sparks reluctantly nodded his head. With relish, Guffin turned to Arturro.
“Alex Arturro, you’re FIRED!”

Ratings: E, E+.

Overall: E+ (A slight dip, not to worry, it still raises our popularity.

Prediction Results:
Jingo: 3/6 (50%)
Rathen4: 3/6 (50%)
Zergon: 3/6 (50%)
Ranson: 2/6 (33%) (And awesome cool points for not only getting the right winning faction but the right winning worker!)
Jaded: 1/4 (25%)

Next post up before Monday ends, I hope.

[TheKenwyne]

June 2010 Recap

ZEN News

Aside from 150 people deciding to show up for our last show, nothing. How booring, eh?

Australian Wrestling News

APW held Beer Bash 2010 in a sold out JDM Arena, drawing a C rating. See if you can complete this sentance: Swoop McCarthy was... in other news, Nathan McKenzie got arrested by the police for anti social behaviour.

DIW held Drop the Bomb in front of 173 people at Marv's Sports Central. The show rated D, with The Comedian as MVP.

RAW got one D and three D+s for it's TV show, with Stars of RAW going down at a sold out JDM Arena also getting D+. Spin Doctor was MVP. Plenty of people resigned this month: Captain Wrestling I and II, Artemis Eyre Rochester and Vincent Victory all inked new deals.

World Wrestling News

Alex Braun, fresh of retirement, ditched PSW in favour of RIPW and SWF, leaving the head booker position free. It was occupied by Corporal Doom, also known as Comissioner Doom, the authority figure with USPW.

Samoan Machine picked up a minor injury this month, damaging his knee, which will effect him for about a month.

Deep breath: Lioness Mushashibo, Lee Wright, Demon Anger and Captain USA all left active competition this month, with Canadian legend Jackson Andrews leaving the business all together. Best of luck to all of them.

ZEN Way of the Warrior 2010
Monday Next vs. Devilfish
Milton Hittlespitz vs. Maurice Jackson
Shaolin (c) vs. C-W-A for the ZEN Conceptual Title
X-War (c) vs. The Enemy for the ZEN Harmony Titles
Plus:
Halloween Knight vs. ??? for the existence of F.E.A.R.
Lone Shark vs. ??? for the existence of the Experience.

I feel like poo, now. Card won't be up till Tuesday, I'm guessing. Depends how rubbish I feel tomorrow. Oh, and did anyone enjoy that main event I spent an hour typing?

[Ranson]

Woohoo! I'm on a roll. Only got two, but one of them was long odds, so I'll take it.

Monday Next vs. Devilfish
Milton Hittlespitz vs. Maurice Jackson
Shaolin (c) vs. C-W-A for the ZEN Conceptual Title
Been seeing this one coming...

X-War (c) vs. The Enemy for the ZEN Harmony Titles
Too much heat there...

Plus:
Halloween Knight vs. ??? for the existence of F.E.A.R.
Lone Shark vs. ??? for the existence of the Experience.
Far too early to shake things up in a big way...gotta let 'em stew.

[Zergon]

Monday Next vs. Devilfish
I expect Monday to win but Devilfish haven´t looked particularly strong so far and a win here would help him to gain some momentum.

Milton Hittlespitz vs. Maurice Jackson
Jackson is part of the leading group now while Milton isn´t in any storylines

Shaolin (c) vs. C-W-A for the ZEN Conceptual Title
I usually go with the champ winning but Shaolin is part of that stable wars I think that Conceptual title doesn´t need to be part of it since most guys in that feud are main eventers and thus too good to hold or even fight on a midcard title.

X-War (c) vs. The Enemy for the ZEN Harmony Titles
X-War keep the titles for now

Halloween Knight vs. ??? for the existence of F.E.A.R.
I like stables so I hope F.E.A.R continues it´s existance

Lone Shark vs. ??? for the existence of the Experience.
Same with Experience

[MaxxHexx]

Monday Next vs. Devilfish
Milton Hittlespitz vs. Maurice Jackson
Shaolin (c) vs. C-W-A for the ZEN Conceptual Title
X-War (c) vs. The Enemy for the ZEN Harmony Titles
Plus:
Halloween Knight vs. ??? for the existence of F.E.A.R.
Lone Shark vs. ??? for the existence of the Experience.

[Jingo]

Monday Next vs. Devilfish
Needs the win i'm thinking
Milton Hittlespitz vs. Maurice Jackson
I like Milton but .. M.J picks up the V
Shaolin (c) vs. C-W-A for the ZEN Conceptual Title
Time for a change
X-War (c) vs. The Enemy for the ZEN Harmony Titles
I'll go the retain for this one,
Plus:
Halloween Knight vs. ??? for the existence of F.E.A.R.
They cant go ..
Lone Shark vs. ??? for the existence of the Experience.
Don't make me beg ..

[Rathen4]

Monday Next vs. Devilfish
Milton Hittlespitz vs. Maurice Jackson
Shaolin (c) vs. C-W-A for the ZEN Conceptual Title
X-War (c) vs. The Enemy for the ZEN Harmony Titles
Plus:
Halloween Knight vs. ??? for the existence of F.E.A.R.
Lone Shark vs. ??? for the existence of the Experience.

[TheKenwyne]

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ZEN.jpg
ZEN Way of the Warrior
Held at the ZEN Temple in front of 164 people

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Devilfish.jpgvs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MondayNext.jpg
Devilfish vs. Monday Next

The show was opened by Devilfish, who was lacking some momentum, and Next, who no-one was quite sure what to think of yet: he hadn’t really had time to connect with the crowd yet, and thus was not really into the ZEN groove quite yet. The duo didn’t really connect, and it took the arrival of Maurice Jackson, running interference, to liven things up. Yale noticed the onrushing Last Laugh member, and called the match a double DQ after he’d near decapitated Devilfish with a clothesline and chased Next from the ring with a chair.

Result: Monday Next drew with Devilfish in 7:34 following a double disqualification.
Rating: E+
Notes: Not the best work of either of these too, this bout dragged in the middle, and the crowd disliked it. The new announce team of Mac Guffin (replacing the kayfabe fired Aruturro) and Sparky Sparks did well.

***

The big screen lit up, showing Halloween Knight entering an office backstage. Mac Guffin sat behind the desk, with Maurice Jackson standing, arms folded, to his side. Knight shot the big man a nervy glance before starting to speak, his voice laced with sarcasm.
“Here I am, great and honourable leader, to apply for the right for F.E.A.R. to continue to exist. I expect you’ll want me to fight a match, because that’s the obvious path for a visionary Sports Entertainment big-wig like yourself.” Guffin blinked, and replied, apparently immune to the sarcastic awesomeness of Knight.
“Why, if you weren’t a heathen idiot who was trying to wrestle originally, you’d make a damn good Sports Entertainment big-wig yourself. Indeed, you will have a match later tonight against members of Last Laugh Inc. If you win, F.E.A.R. continues to exist, if you lose, I crush it like the seething vat or originality and individuality it is.” Knight, apparently satisfied, turned to leave, but, after a sudden realisation, spun around to face Guffin.
“Members of Last Laugh? Surely you mean member!” Guffin smiled malevolently, taking delight at his next sentence.
“I meant what I said, Knight. Now, leave my office.[/color”] Knight looked like he was about to take a swing at Guffin, but Jackson stepped forward and glowered at him. An angry Knight turned and strode from the room, right into Necromancer who was waiting outside. Their eyes connected. Knight shook his head. Necromancer bowed his own, briefly, before out of sight.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MauriceJackson.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MiltonHittlespitz.jpg
Maurice Jackson vs. Milton Hittlespitz

It’s a pity that these too didn’t click, as they are both good brawlers. Though Hittlespitz is the more talented wrestler, Jackson’s greater entertainment skills means that he went over here following a big low blow. Also he needed to appear strong after missing out on the Battle Royal win for his stable last month.

Result: Maurice Jackson defeated Milton Hittlespitz in 8:06 by pinfall
Rating: E
Notes: No chemistry here, nope. Commentary did good, crowd disliked.

***

Jackson slid out of the ring as soon as the ref finished the count, and grabbed a mic before scaling the ring steps and facing the crowd.
“[color="brown"]Yo, homies. I’m Maurice Jackson, and I’m a little worried about my career. Y’see, I came here for glory, and here I am, three months into my career, and all I ever here is Last Laugh this, Last Laugh that, Jimmy Stratosphere here, Mac Guffin here… and my ego can’t take that shiz any longer! So I’m here to tell you that I’m Maurice Jackson, and I’m better than everyone in this damn promotion. I look down on your pathetic masked heroes, and these predictably generic lackeys who I work with…” Mac Guffin sprang up and shouted at Jackson to be quiet, but he was without a mic, and no-one could here what he said.
“What, Mac? Can’t tale anyone else grabbing the spotlight? Don’t worry, man, I’m not selling my shares, I’m not leaving you. That’d mean joining the freaks, and I hella don’t wanna do that, think of what it’d do to my image! But I’d just like some me time to massage my bruised ego. You got a problem with that, your highness?” Mac Guffin sat down and sulked as the crowd gave a posing Jackson a mix of cheers and boos, unsure of how to take the outspoken man.
“So yeah, in conclusion, it won’t be long till you’re seeing gold round this finely formed waist. Check me out!” Knights of Cydonia hit and Jackson strutted to the back, now getting boos for his rather self centred parting statement.

Rating: D (This is why I hired him, see?)

***

Lone Shark hit the ring to a thunderous pop. He basked in his people’s adoration for a while, ZEN Master belt over his shoulder, before quietening them with a wave of his hand and raising his mic.
“Hey, hey, quiet down people. It’s good to be here, I know, good to be here, good to get up the noses of the gits in Last Laugh! Pop.
“Yeah, well, I’m here to apply to keep The Experience alive in memory of our good friend Alex Arturro. And to keep you from pulling any dirty tricks like you did with Knight, I’m willing to put my title on the line to guarantee you’re sense of fair play doesn’t AWOL. That way it has to be a one on one match, and any interference related victories mean the title doesn’t change hands. Check and mate, Guffin.” Shark shot a wry smile at the announce table. Where Guffin offered a barely perceptual nod. Shark punched the air, lapped up the pop, and ‘swam’ backstage to the Jaws Theme.

Rating: D (Storyline heat turn Shark’s average entertainment skills up a few notches.)

***
http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Shaolin.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/CWA.jpg
Shaolin (c) vs. C-W-A for the ZEN Conceptual title

Shaolin started strong and didn’t slow down, keeping ZEN’s resident comedy clown on the back foot through out. He nailed the Death Touch, but Maurice Jackson flew in from the back and clotheslined the champ to the mat. Yale called for the bell as Jackson laid on the boots.

Result: Shaolin defeated C-W-A in 10:28 by disqualification.
Rating: E+
Notes: Shaolin was off his game here. The commentary did well, the crowd didn’t like it at all.

***

Not finished, Jackson beat down on the ninja, who struggled away but could do nothing, while C-W-A watched in horror. Jackson brought a chair into the ring, before hitting the Rolling DDT onto it. He left a stunned C-W-A and a unconscious Shaolin in the ring as he swanned his way to the back.

Rating: E-

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ManOWar.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Cyanide.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Massacre.jpg
X-War vs. The Enemy for the ZEN Harmony Titles

Routine defence from the champs, sealed via Calbire’s Springboard 460. The commentators put over how this could be the last time Massacre and Cyanide could team together as a part of F.E.A.R.

Result: X-War defeated The Enemy in 11:27 when X-Calibre defeated Massacre by pinfall with a Springboard 460.
Rating: D-
Notes: Commentary did well.

***

The big screen lit up, showing Halloween Knight all pumped backstage, when out of nowhere Necromancer blasted Knight to the ground with a big shoulder check. He locked on the Death Scream, cranking it until his stable leader was rendered unconscious. Necromancer stood, remorsefully.
“Sorry, my friend, but I can’t trust you to preserve F.E.A.R.’s existence. I can only trust myself.” He left for the ring, the cameras focused on the downed Knight.

Rating: E
Notes: Necromancer’s character is stale. Poo.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Necromancer.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/RodSullivan.jpg http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Seeker.jpg
Necromancer vs. See No Evil for the existence of F.E.A.R.

This match was poor and disjointed, but See No Evil were all over the veteran Necromancer. The crowd were well into it though, making the whole thing appear a lot better than it actually was. Seeker hit a monster Snap Neckbreaker for the win, and F.E.A.R. is no more!

Result: See No Evil defeated Necromancer in 11:26 when Seeker defeated Necromancer by pinfall
Rating: D-
Notes: Seeker was off his game tonight, which would expain why the match sucked so hard. The commentators did well, and the crowd hated it.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/LoneShark.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/JimmyStratosphere.jpg
Lone Shark (c) vs. Jimmy Stratosphere for the ZEN Master title and the existence of the Experience.

Stratosphere did the unthinkable and dominated Shark, giving the ZEN Master hell for 15 minutes. It looked like Last Laugh Inc would be the only stable left standing until Halloween Knight’s music hit and the former leader of F.E.A.R. charged to the ring. He speared Stratosphere to the mat. Mac Guffin yelled for Yale to call the DQ, but the blind ref refused to deliver the killing blow to the original ZEN ideals, and Shark covered, and 1, 2, 3. Guffin screamed abuse at Yale, claiming he would hire a new referee, only for Sparks to tell him to shut up. A subdued Guffin watched as Knight raised Shark’s arm in victory.

Result: In a bout that had a good crowd and some decent in-ring action, Lone Shark defeated Jimmy Stratosphere in 16:28 by pinfall
Rating: D (Match) E+ (Angle)
Notes: Shark’s character is becoming stale. Good thing he’s changing gimmick already to ‘Leader of the Resistance’. Commentators did well, also.

Overall: D- (Normal service has resumed.)


Predictions:

Jingo: 6/12 (50%)
Zergon: 6/12 (50%)
Rathen4: 6/12 (50%)
MaxxHexx: 3/6 (50%
Ranson: 4/12 (33%)
Jaded: 1/4 (25%)

Next post late tonight or Friday, I have an article to write tomorrow.

[TheKenwyne]

July 2010 Recap

ZEN News

Picture the scene. ZEN Way of the Warrior has just finished. I'm lounging backstage, can of lager in hand. Everyone's generally laid back, pleased that we'd put on a good show. The only guy missing was Frankie, who had dissapeared into the crowd to sign some autographs following the main event. When he returned he had some beardy guy with him. Vertigo, ever the diplomat, enquired
"Who's the freak?" Frankie shot him a look of pure venom, before introducing Barry Fitzgerald. To the Aussies this blatantly meant something, as they all leapt up to shake his hand, while Vertigo looked suitably sheepish. In fact, it's the most sheepish I've seen the guy. There followed a long session of discussion with Barry. Halloween Knight drew some brilliant caricatures of the more laid back members of the roster, before he called Barry and I into his office.

We left the office richer. Barry told us the show had been a 'Bloody good laugh, mate!' and then gave Frankie a check. I've never seen the usually laid back HK so shocked. Barry smiled and wandered out of the room. Frankie showed me the check. My brain combusted. ZEN is now $10million richer. Woah.

In other news, Massacre extended his contract with us. Frankie and I have discussed operating another monthly show, entitled 'Way of the Fitzgerald' in honour of Barry. But that's still a pipe dream. It won't happen till November time at the earliest.

Australian News

APW ran Finest Hour at a sold out JDM, drawing a C rating. Lanny Williams stole Swoop's MVP award with a stellar co-main event. The company extended the deals of Blake Belushi and Markus Rush.

DIW The Last Hard Men sold out Marv's Sports Central, getting a D. Menace to Sobriety was MVP, and Wez Dobberly extended his deal.

RAW's TV show got two Ds and two D+s, with Stars of RAW selling out the JDM and getting a D+. Luke Steele was MVP, and Molokai Milk extended his deal with the company.

World News

PGHW and WEXXV both grew, the former to National, the latter to Regional.

Axxis Jr is out for a year with a shattered elbow, PRIDE Kosio for 14 months with a Shattered Knee and Goemon Koniya out for just over a year with a Major Concussion.

Leo Davis and Namiyo Mora retired from active competition, with Dick the Devastator leaving the business.

ZEN Way of the Liar 2010
Devilfish vs. Necromancer
The Horror Show vs. The Sky Kings
Shaolin (c) vs. Maurice Jackson vs. Man O'War for the ZEN Conceptual title
Monday Next vs. Cyanide
Halloween Knight vs. Jimmy Stratosphere
Lone Shark (c) vs. X-Calibre for the ZEN Master title

Show tomorrow!

[Ranson]

Devilfish vs. Necromancer
FEAR is still reeling, and 'Fish needs the momentum

The Horror Show vs. The Sky Kings

Shaolin (c) vs. Maurice Jackson vs. Man O'War for the ZEN Conceptual title
I still see Shaolin dropping the belt soon, and the new regime needs a title.

Monday Next vs. Cyanide
See note 1

Halloween Knight vs. Jimmy Stratosphere
Draw in a brawl...Both need to be strong

Lone Shark (c) vs. X-Calibre for the ZEN Master title
Barring extraordinary circumstances, this is a win. He may win by DQ from getting attacked.

[MaxxHexx]

Devilfish vs. Necromancer
The Horror Show vs. The Sky Kings
Shaolin (c) vs. Maurice Jackson vs. Man O'War for the ZEN Conceptual title
Monday Next vs. Cyanide
Halloween Knight vs. Jimmy Stratosphere
Lone Shark (c) vs. X-Calibre for the ZEN Master title

[Zergon]

Devilfish vs. Necromancer
Both guys could use a win but I go with Devilfish mainly bacause Knight might interference and cost Necromancer the match after last month.

The Horror Show vs. The Sky Kings
Sky Kings cannot go exist anymore so they pick a loss here

Shaolin (c) vs. Maurice Jackson vs. Man O'War for the ZEN Conceptual title
I still think that Shaolin will drop the belt

Monday Next vs. Cyanide
I would like to see Cyanide gaining some momentum but I don´t think it will happen here

Halloween Knight vs. Jimmy Stratosphere
I think that Jimmy is being built as a serious contender for Knight and Lone Shark who I see as your top two guys currently and since those two seems to be on a same side now Jimmy gets a win here in order to quickly gain momentum.

Lone Shark (c) vs. X-Calibre for the ZEN Master title
X-Calibre isn´t there yet

[Jingo]

Devilfish vs. Necromancer
The Horror Show vs. The Sky Kings
Shaolin (c) vs. Maurice Jackson vs. Man O'War for the ZEN Conceptual title
Monday Next vs. Cyanide
Halloween Knight vs. Jimmy Stratosphere
Lone Shark (c) vs. X-Calibre for the ZEN Master title

[TheKenwyne]

Pre-show, Vertigo was once again involved in an incident backstage. Fortunatley for him, Seeker was on the offensive, riling up the man with a prestigiously short temper. I informed Seeker that we didn't stand for that sort of thing here, and he told me it wouldn't happen again, boss. What's this??!! Respect from the talent! Now I've seen everything.


http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ZEN.jpg
ZEN Way of the Liar
Held at the ZEN Temple in front of 142 people

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Devilfish.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Necromancer.jpg
Devilfish vs. Necromancer

This match would've been headline worthy in early shows, but now it opens, and to be honest, it was a dissapointment. The crowd got into it, the wrestlers even wrestled half well, but the bout lacked the flow required for it to be considered good. Devilfish won following Halloween Knight taking Necromancer down for the 'Fish to secure the pin.

Result: Devilfish defeated Necromancer in 7:43 by pinfall
Rating: E
Notes: Gimmick Change for Necromancer, getting a C rating. The match dragged in the middle, despite the announcer's best efforts. The crowd stamped the match with their dislike sticker.

***

Lone Shark hit the ring. Halloween Knight stayed out following his involvement in the match prior. Shark soaked in the cheers before raising the mic to his lips.
"Hey, hey, cool it guys. Here I am after saving the existence of The Experience..." Pop.
"And now I have the pleasure of introducing to you all our newest member, Halloween Knight!" The crowd were briefly unsure how to react to Knight's new stance, but when Shark raised his new ally's hand to the rafters, the crowd offered some polite applause for the new member of the stable.
"We hope that our time together will be mutually beneficial, now he have set aside our differences for the good of ZEN." The crowd cheered some more. Shark shook Knight's hand, and the duo retreated to the back.
"You'll be seeing us both later! Enjoy the show, ZEN-o-philes!"

Rating: D (Just because my writing here sucked dosen't meant the promo did ingame.)

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/NightmareSlasher.jpghttp://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/NightmareStalker.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Vertigo.jpghttp://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/SuperZero.jpg
The Horror Show vs. The Sky Kings

The former tag champs looked a little more together than they had previously. Despite still looking a bit awkuard, the duo still outclassed the Horror Show, with Zero getting the pin over Slasher following a big double team by The Sky Kings. The winners celebrated halfheartedly, even Molly Cuddle looking unsure of how the partners stood.

Result: The Sky Kings defeated The Horror Show in 8:20 when Super Zero defeated Nightmare Slasher by pinfall.
Rating: E
Notes: The Commentary did well, the crowd didn't enjoy it. Vertigo is getting better at Rumble.

***

X-War came down to the front armed with their Harmony belts. There were a few interchange between Man O'War and the crowd (Yarr? HARR!) before X-Calibre quietened them all down and began to speak
"What up, dingos? Here we are, X-War, still armed with our the Harmony straps. That makes it, ooh, three months now? We're doing good, it's safe to say, and this hasn't escaped those in high places. Mr Mac Guffin has decided to award our good work with two title shots! I'm facing Lone Shark later tonight in the main event for his Master title, while Man O'War will be taking part in a three way match for the Conceptual title involving himself, Shaolin and Maurice Jackson!" Calibre soaked up the pop. Man O'War yarr-harr'ed.
"So if you're sick of the politics and the backstabbing, keep your eyes on X-War, where good old fashioned hard work - and laziness - lives on. Keep it real, dingos, and we'll see you later." The duo exited to a pop and a few yarr-harrs!.

Rating: D+ (They really are quite good at this)

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Shaolin.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/ManOWar.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MauriceJackson.jpg
Shaolin (c) vs. Man O'War vs. Maurice Jackson for the ZEN Conceptual title.

This was suprisingly good, but it lacked a bit of flow, and despite the fact that we'd gone over the spots backstage with Frankie and myself, this match drifted a little throughout. The finish came when Maurice Jackson Rolling DDT'd Man O'War into unconciousness before hitting the lariat on Shaolin and using the ropes to aid him en route to the pinfall victory. Mac Guffin went crazy at ringside as Last Laugh Inc. earned it's first gold - or it's first idea of gold - in ZEN.

Result: Maurice Jackson defeated Shaolin and Man O' War in 11:47 when Maurice Jackson defeated Shaolin by pinfall.
Rating: E+
Notes: Lack of flow and of psychology, here. The commentary did well and the crowd dislike it.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/MondayNext.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/Cyanide.jpg
Monday Next vs. Cyanide

The collapse of F.E.A.R. continued as the commentators reminded us that if any members of F.E.A.R. attempted to interfere, they would be fired for meeting as part of a banned group. Cyanide put up a brave struggle, but Next walked all over him, eventually securing a pin following the Flash Forward.

Result: Monday Next defeated Cyanide in 9:17 by pinfall.
Rating: D-
Notes: The commentators did well, while the crowd continued to moan about the match.

***

Whike Next celebrated in ring, Lone Shark cruised in from the back and joined him in ring.
"Monday Next, I've been admiring your work ever since you joined this company. I'm not going to lie when I say that I see you at the top of totem pole here; the only person who can even hold a candle to you is me. Sure, Halloween Knight is great, Jimmy Stratosphere is skillful, X-Calibre's, well, X-Calibre. But you're one of the best young wrestlers anywhere, full stop. If you join me, we can throw out this disgrace of a coporation lowering the tone here, and you can become remembered as a true ZEN great." Next smiled, and nodded.
"I'll take that under advisement." He left the ring, with the corporate nature of his closing statement not lost on Lone Shark, who also made his way to the back, perturbed.

Rating: E+

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/HalloweenKnight.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/JimmyStratosphere.jpg
Halloween Knight vs. Jimmy Stratosphere

The commentators put over how the winner here would be considered the number one contender to Lone Shark's Master title, while Knight and Stratosphere went at it in the ring. Knight tried to ground the high flyer, but found himself matched in the ground elements. However, it took Maurice Jackson shoulder charging Knight to the ground to set him up for Stratosphere's Frog Splash for Last Laugh's first son to take the win.

Result: Jimmy Stratosphere defeated Halloween Knight in 15:16 by pinfall.
Rating: D
Notes: None.

***

http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/LoneShark.jpg vs. http://i965.photobucket.com/albums/ae137/TheKenwyne/Diary%20pics/X-Calibre.jpg
Lone Shark (c) vs. X-Calibre for the ZEN Master title

Ah. This was just not the sum of it's parts. These two, on their day, are among the top few performers here at ZEN, but during this match they just didn't show it. It was an even, open affair, but it was hard to watch. The ending saw Monday Next storm down to the ring and knock down X-Calibre with a big right. Yale called for the bell as Next offered Shark his hand. Shark, despite his anger at the interference, accepted the hand. Next booted him in the gut and rolled him onto his back, as in from the back came Jimmy Stratosphere, who sprang over the top ropes into a Frog Splash, slamming down hard onto Lone Shark.

Result: X-Calibre defeated Lone Shark in 14:19 when Lone Shark was disqualified
Rating: E+ (Ouch!)
Notes: Calibre was tiring towards the end of the bout. The crowd disliked it and the commentary did well, with the bout lagging in the middle.

***

Monday Next stood over a winded Shark, and shook Stratosphere's hand to thunderous boos.
"Guess what Shark? I'm not joining your screwy organisation. I don't want to. I want gold, and why should I join your group when the gold's round you're waist. No, I'm suited much better to a group who share the same goals as me... getting the gold away from you. Fine, we may plan to get to that goal in a different way, but I'm sure that, next month, when you have a Triple Threat match with me and Jimmy here, you won't walk out the champ." Next dropped the mic and strode from the ring, big grin on his face.

Rating: D-

Overall: D- (Saved by the angle!)

Predictions

Predictions:

MaxxHexx: 8/12 (66%)
Zergon: 10/18 (55%)
Rathen4: 6/12 (50%)
Ranson: 8/18 (44%)
Jingo: 8/18 (44%)
Jaded: 1/4 (25%)

Next post tomorrow

[TheKenwyne]

August 2010 Recap

ZEN News

No, none of this.

Australian Wrestling News

APW's Championship Carnival sold out the Fuster Hall, getting a C. SWOOOOP was MVP.

DIW Battle in the Asylum continued the growth for the company, drawing 289 people to Marv's Sports Central, earning itself a D+. The Comedian was MVP. Big Rig extended his contract with the promotion.

RAW Attitude! got two Ds and two D+s in it's run this month. Stars of RAW, now at it's 18th installment, earned a D+, with Luke Steele MVP.

World Wrestling News

TCW continue a good year, ignoring financial stress to rise to Global and give Richy Eisen cause to look over his shoulder.

This was a bad month for women's wrestling, with Catherine Quine, Miss Mexico and Junko Hayakawa all announcing their retirements from active competition. Canadian legend and former tag team partner to George DeColt Whipper Spencer Marks left the business.

ZEN Way of the Spy 2010
American Nightmare vs. Necromancer
Devilfish vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon
C-W-A vs. Milton Hittlespitz
The Shadows vs. The Sky Kings
X-War vs. See No Evil for the ZEN Harmony Titles
Lone Shark and Halloween Knight vs. Jimmy Stratosphere and Monday Next

Show up soon. Not giving strict deadlines anymore, I just beat myself up when I fail to meet them. Approximately two-three shows after this before reward.

[Ranson]

American Nightmare vs. Necromancer

Devilfish vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon
MUJG has zero momentum right now.

C-W-A vs. Milton Hittlespitz

The Shadows vs. The Sky Kings
Maintaining after the last win...

X-War vs. See No Evil for the ZEN Harmony Titles
I see them holding the titles for a while yet. The storyline might break this team up before they truly drop the belts.

Lone Shark and Halloween Knight vs. Jimmy Stratosphere and Monday Next
Next, on DQ Beatdown Theatre...

[Jingo]

American Nightmare vs. Necromancer
Devilfish vs. Mirror Universe John Gordon
C-W-A vs. Milton Hittlespitz
The Shadows vs. The Sky Kings
X-War vs. See No Evil for the ZEN Harmony Titles
Lone Shark and Halloween Knight vs. Jimmy Stratosphere and Monday Next