USPW: Where Ages 68 and Older Still Won't Retire

[J Silver]

Disclaimer: This diary is being done for fun. In other words none of it is to be taken seriously because let's face it, taking USPW seriously could seriously cause a need for anti-depressants. Also, please don't take me or what I say too seriously, I sure as hell don't.

The Pitch

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/male2.jpg

My name is Jacob Stranton, and I am, despite what others may tell you, a very promising, upcoming writer for television. I've only recently come up with the best idea of my entire career and today is the day I pitch my pilot to my boss.

"Look Mr. Washburn, I know you told me to just keep my young, ignorant gob shut and do my job-"

"So why the hell aren't you?" When do I ever?

"But I think I finally got it. A show that could give our network a chance in the ratings."
"Shut your ignorant gob and get back to doing your goddamn job Jacob!"
"Now today's youth still enjoy superheroes, but market research shows that they just can't relate to their messages of good will towards your fellow man, doing the right thing, being selfless, stealing is uncool, eat your vegetables, or thou shalt not kill or Superman will superpunch you in the balls."
"Jay, at this point I could get a monkey and it would be more productive than you." I concede to the monkey in productivity and cleanliness, but it just won't have the way with words that I do.
"Yeah, well just make sure it doesn't have the pox. Anyhow, todays youth want an edgy superhero, one they can relate to. One who steals, does drugs, makes love to a woman and never calls them again, insults people for no reason other than 'because I can' or 'look, he's different', drinks and parties hard, and who never actually accomplishes anything due to procrastination."

"Jay, if you don't stop pitching me these stupid pilots I'm going to fire you." No, you won't.
"Just hear me out on this one, it's perfect to capture the coveted 8-34 year old market."
"We have a good viewership in those markets." Yeah, 200 people. The only advertiser that wants a piece of that action makes cheese in his moms basement.
"But Mr. Washburn, it's a superhero show. It's a lot better than the crap that you have on now. It's called...


Get ready for it....



Get excited....



Pretends there's a drumroll here.....



Tension~!....




'The Adventures of Negativity-Rex and Douche-Lad!'


...Well?"

".... Get the hell out of my office."
"Now I know this may not seem to fit the companies image-"
"We're a sports network, not trash TV like Pop."
"But I really feel that people will actually watch this instead of the crap we already air."
"Again Jay, we're a sports network." Hah!
"Yeah, and a second-rate one to boot."
"Don't call my network second-rate." Third-rate any better, boss?
"But it is. Sports America: Airing the crap GNN won't. We don't get football, we don't get baseball, hell we don't even get hockey. We get badminton, indoor kart racing, eXtreme figure skating, Segway Polo, Pro Wrestling, Women's Basketball, and curling. Curling for f***s sake. Even Canada doesn't want curling."
"Have you ever actually watched curling?"
"No. Have you? And I'm pretty sure that making me goes against the cruel and inhumane torture act."

"Jacob, let me tell you something. You're lucky that you write the best captions for the website out of anyone else here." And an easy task really. I mean what other job is going to pay me this well to insult people? "But if you don't focus on getting that done I'm not going to keep you around. Understood?"

"I understand sir."
"Good."
"And thinking about it I don't think Sports America should be a sports network anymore. I mean not that it ever really was in the publics eye, more of a joke for D-list comedians to make fun of to feel better about themselves. I digress on that point though. You're in charge around here, you can totally do that."
"Jay, firstly think about our stockholders."
"You mean the cow farmer in Arkansas and the Eskimo blubber hunter? They're loyal to us Mr. Washburn. I mean they'd have to be. They bought stock when it was $ .24 and it's now down to $ .11 a share. I really don't think they expect us to improve much as is."
"We have more stockholders than those two Jay. Apart from that we appeal to a very loyal audience."
"And a very niche one at that. Public Access beats us in the rating on a regular basis. Public Access!" Seriously, The Stamford High School Televangelist Hour outdoes most of our programming in ratings. Production values too.

"Jacob, I'm going to count from five. If you're not out of my office before then and back at your desk doing your job I will fire you. Do you understand?" No comprendé.
"No, not really. I'm just trying to help out here Mr. Washburn."
"Five, four, three..."
"I really feel my skills could be better utilized than just writing captions."
"Two, one..."
"I feel my skills can be used to tell a great story, and I just can't see any realistic way to spice up Segway Polo."
"Zero. You haven't left."
"Nope."

"Clean out your desk."
"Am I fired?"
"Jacob, go clean out your desk."
"So, when will I get my severance pay? Or do I just collect unemployment? How's this going to work?"
"...Your new boss is going to work that out with you."
"New boss? You lost me there Mr. Washburn."
"Jacob, you're not being fired, you're being transferred to a show that I think your 'unique' talents will be better utilized."


"Oh, cool. Wait, what show? Please don't let it be curling sir, please no, anything but that sir! Anything..."

[mistaken]

straps in to prevent laugh pants off.

[Jaded]

Back? Cool! :)

[mad5226]

Love it already

[James Casey]

Hey, and indeed hey. Cool to have you back. See you on Valentines for the next post? ;)

[Nightshadeex]

Hahaha, you're gonna get stuck on USPW. I saw the pro wrestling gag in what the network airs.

[Bigpapa42]

Sweetness. I would have followed regardless of what promotion you ended up choosing, but this definitely feels "right". Glad to be in from the start this time and looking forward to whatever you might have in store for us...

[angeldelayette]

Uh oh. There goes the neighborhood! lol. Good to see you back, J. Silver, and glad to see you running USPW. The promotion wouldn't be the same without you!

[J Silver]

The Fantasy Promotion


It's not curling, of that much I've been assured. Where I've been transferred and what I'll be doing still remains a mystery to me though as Mr. Washburn just reassured me that I'll 'enjoy' my new position. I'm not sure I believe him yet.

I walked back to my desk observing our withering studio as I did. All the viewers and advertising money that my vision of 'The Adventures of Negativity-Rex and Douche-Lad' could bring to this crappy station and Washburn passes on it. Sometimes I really wonder how he could've have earned that bachelor's degree in advertising turning down great ideas like mine. Oh well, time to clear out my desk and go wherever the one-way train ticket that's supposed to be on my desk takes me.

When I got to my desk I found my supervisor Randall Myles waiting for me. The good thing is that Randy actually likes me which is odd because most of my superiors either find me annoying, insufferable, tough to deal with or just a genral pain in the ass. Actually most of my relatives do too. Would be nice to be invited to Christmas dinner this year. "Going on a trip?" Randy asks as I walk up to him looking at the tickets "Yup, I just got transferred and a promotion" I answer. Randy looks at me quizzically, "To Florida?"

"Guess so. Why do you ask?"
"No reason, I'm just not aware of any Sports America divisions out there."
"Maybe I'm supposed to be the one who starts it up then."
"No offense Jay, but you?"
"Hey, I'm capable."
"Not saying you aren't, it's just that Washburn kind of, ya know, hates you."
"I'll give you a call when I get down there." I grab the envelope with my tickets from his hand, "Hope you're prepared to be wrong."
"And I hope you're prepared to accept that he actually went to the expense of paying for plane tickets-"
"Train tickets."
"Wow, that's really cheap of him. Anyway, as I was saying I hope you're prepared to realize he went through the expense of getting you train tickets-"
"Ticket."
"-Just to leave you stranded in Florida and far away from him."
"He wouldn't do that, it involves too much expenditure on his part."
"We'll see. Good luck out there."

I cleaned out my desk which mostly just consisted of an assortment of notepads and sketchpads detailing some of my ideas for 'The Adventures of Negativity-Rex & Douche-Lad' and other awesome ideas that Mr. Washburn passed on. I threw those and my laptop into a nice cardboard box and bid farewell to my co-workers, the next time they see me I'll be the only successful thing ever produced by Sports America. With a skip in my step I walked out the front door, the security guard being nice enough to escort me out. Never know what kind of crazies walk these Connecticut streets.

I took the city bus home as I always do and started packing up my stuff for my new future in Florida, land of sun, fun and hopefully hot women. In what I guess is a lucky break for me I didn't have much to pack, my last landlord tossed most of my stuff out and broke most of the rest of it. If only daddy had been more careful. I could hardly sleep that night envisioning what kind of exciting new adventures were just on the horizon for me when I get to Florida and go to this building that I've been instructed to by this little piece of paper. Maybe I'll be heading up a new division of Sports America, or maybe Mr. Washburn has connections and I got through to him with my newest pilot, or maybe Randy's right and he plans to leave me stranded out there. I'd rather not think about that last one, though it does give me an idea for an episode of 'The Adventures of Negativity-Rex & Douche-Lad.'

I awoke the next morning to the blaring sounds of my alarm, fell out of bed, had breakfast, took a taxi to the train station, boarded it and was on my way to my future. Two miserable days on a train with 5 year olds yelling and screaming around me and using me as their personal punching bag while their fatass mother just sat there and did nothing about it, actually kind of encouraging them by telling the little mistakes to leave her alone later I finally arrived in Sunny Miami, Florida. I picked up a map from a very nice bum on the street and went on my way to see the sights and settle into my new job, whatever that may be. After consulting my handy dandy new, only slight stained (I don't really want to know with what) map I realized I was only 4 blocks away from my ultimate destination. I also spotted a very intriguing location sort of on my way there, and being a true red-blooded American there was no way to pass up on something this beautifully American.

I walked up to it dragging my boxes behind me, the sign itself just so beautiful, Haulover Beach, Miami Nude Beach. A nude beach, being head of my own division, my writing finally being recognized for it's worth. It's like all of my dreams coming true in one day, I take back all of the bad things I said about Mr. Washburn, not the network though, that's still crap. I dropped my boxes and my backpack and waded through the bushes until I came out on the other side and saw the promised land, and it..... is ......blinding me. I feel lied to like when I found out it wasn't the tooth fairy taking my teeth from under my pillow and leaving me a toothbrush. The beach was lined with nude sunbathers, mostly women and every single one somewhere between 60 and 70 judging by the wrinkles. The wrinkles were everywhere. Everywhere. Where the hell are all of the young attractive people I was promised in those girls gone wild videos I asked myself as I hightailed it out of there as soon as I could. I'll never look at grandma the same way again...

Never had I been so glad to have been too broke to have lunch. I'd be liable to lose it right about now. I picked up my backpack and grabbed hold of my box again and made my way towards my destination. On the way there I noticed a somewhat strange phenomenon, everyone I passed on the street on my way there was old. I don't mean like in their 40's old, I mean white haired and retired 60+ years old. It was like a scene out of that horror movie 'Night of The Living Old' or whatever it's called. I had been in Florida for almost an hour now and not seen one young person, not even a child. What kind of bizarre, sick, twisted place had Mr. Washburn sent me? What could he possibly want me to run out here? Why did I have to take back all of the bad things I said about him? Conflabit, that was so naive of me, I should have thought about it over a nice glass of prune juice.

I finally made it to the building that was listed on the piece of paper. I walked into the front foyer and looked at the listing on the side, I was looking for suite 3. I looked down the list and found it, my future. I read it aloud to myself, "USPW, United... States.... Pro ......Wrestling?"

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/USPWLogo.jpg


Wrestling? Wrestling?! Goddammit! That's two fantasies ruined in the same day....
<hr>
Thank you for the comments everyone.
Sweetness. I would have followed regardless of what promotion you ended up choosing, but this definitely feels "right". Glad to be in from the start this time and looking forward to whatever you might have in store for us...Well that's good, I'm used to doing the wrong thing. And believe me, I have plenty in store for this dynasty.
Uh oh. There goes the neighborhood! lol. Good to see you back, J. Silver, and glad to see you running USPW. The promotion wouldn't be the same without you!Which is odd because it sure as hell ain't the same with me, I make sure of that.
Hey, and indeed hey. Cool to have you back. See you on Valentines for the next post? ;)No!

.... Christmas. Hey, wipe that smug smile off your face.


One more backstory post before getting to the show which'll be up on this Wednesday. As though anyone's actually going to believe that...

[Dragonmack]

One more backstory post before getting to the show which'll be up on Wednesday. As though anyone's actually going to believe that...

no one doubts you will have the show posted Wednesday. The only questions is which of the 52 wednesdays this year it will be. :p

[J Silver]

65 And Older Need Not Apply


Well, now I understand a little better what he meant when he said I was getting a promotion. He meant a wrestling promotion. Maybe I can just go into unemployment, I hear it's a growing field these days. I contemplated that route, but after giving it thought I figured maybe wrestling isn't such a bad option. I mean it's basically just a violent, somewhat sensical soap opera meant for men and dirty, horny old women, right? I decided I'd try this out. What's the worst that could happen?

I walked up to the office and ventured in. This place was almost as much of a dump as Sports America Headquarters. I walked up to the receptionist who looked to be well into her 60's. She was doing her nails and talking to her girlfriend on the phone. "Hi." I walked up and said uneasily. She turned her head and stared at me for a moment, "Rhonda, I'll call ya back." She said into her phone before hanging it up. "So, what can I do for you handsome?"

"I'm, uhh... I'm here about a job."
"Well doll you'll just need to fill out on of these applications."
"Actually I was transferred here by Mr. Washburn."
"Washburn? Oh, that network jerk. Mr. Strong's been waiting for you and may I say you're much better looking than your file photo." I think she's hitting on me.
"He has? Really? Well, can I see him?"

The secretary picks up her phone and dials a few numbers, "Mr. Strong, your new booker's here. Mhmm... yeah.... of course.... I'll send him right in."

"Mr. Strong's waiting for you in his office. It's straight down the hall and to your right. You can't miss it, it's the only door that actually closes."
"Thank you for your help ma'am."
"Just call me Mathilde, hot stuff." She than proceeded to wink at me. I'm glad I still haven't had lunch yet.

I walked down the hall and just like Mathilde had said none of the doors, but one actually stay closed. Not even the bathroom door, another chance to have lost my lunch. Maybe I should just stop eating or maybe I'm onto the next big miracle diet, making you not want to bother with food, you'll just lose it when you walk past the bathroom anyhow. I made it to the door, it staying closed wasn't the only thing giving it away. A very large, vertically and horizontally, bald, angry looking black man stood next to the door, Strong's bodyguard I presumed. I went to open the door and he stood in my path looking down at me with a pissed off expression on his face, the guy had the build of a bear. Of course that wasn't what I was thinking at the moment, I was thinking 'Wow, someone not 65 and older.' "You mind getting outta my way, I have an appointment or something with Mr. Strong." He just peered down at me, a mean expression on his face as though he could kill me. Then he totally blew that illusion when he opened his mouth. "Step away from the door." he said in a high pitched voice sounding as though someone was squeezing his family jewels.

"Maybe I should introduce myself, I'm Jacob Stranton and I'm here to be a booker or something, I think that's what she said."
"I don't care if you're the Queen of England, you don't get by unless I get a call on this radio to let you through."
"Is your radio on?"
"Of course my radio's o-" He looks at his radio and obviously notices it's not on. He turns it on and pretends it was on the whole time. "It's on."
"Tiny, has that network stooge showed up yet?" Network stooge? I'm no stooge, I'm more like the network jester if anything.
"Yeah, he here."
"Well then let him in and let's get this over with brother."
"You can go in now."
"Yeah, sure. Oh, and thanks for the warm welcome there Sasquatch."

I walk into the room and find Sam Strong sitting behind his desk. He's not alone though, sitting on his couch was a very large, fat man with a red beard and a bald head. Standing right next to him was what looked like an old, washed up wrestler who was walking around with a title belt on his waist. Wonder if he walks the streets with that thing on. Standing next to the couch was a man with a beard, sunglasses and a ponytail. Yeah, a ponytail, the guy has to be old and senile to think those are still in fashion. "Sit down brother, we have a lot to discuss." Strong said as I walked in. I took a seat in the chair in front of his desk.

"Now, do you know why you're here brother?" Because Washburn hates me?
"No, not really. I just was told I was transferred." And various other lies.
"You're here to be a booker, my head booker in fact brother." Why does he keep calling me brother?
"Oh, okay.... What's that?"
Strong looked at me with a look best summed up as 'Are you f***ing kidding me?' "Are you f***ing kidding me brother? You were transferred here and you don't even know what that is?"
"Nope."
"Okay, tell me something, do you know who I am brother?"
"Mr. Strong?"
"Let's try something else, do you know who he is?" Sam said pointing at the couch.
"Uhh... Redbeard, The Morbidly Obese Pirate?"
"Who the hell are you calling obese needledick!?" Temper, temper.
"Calm down Redwood, the kid's an idiot."
"I don't give a **** if that little **** is a ****ing idiot, nobody calls me fat and doesn't get the **** beat out of their ****ing ***!"
"What's your name kid?"
"I'm Jacob, Jacob Stranton."
"Now do you know why I won't just tell you to pack your bags and then have Tiny throw you out of this building brother?" Because you're much nicer than the beached whale over there?
"No sir."
"Because your boss, Mr. Washburn made it very clear. Either I give you a job and keep you out of his hair or American Wrestling gets pulled from the line-up at Sports America. Now do you know what you're going to do for me?" I shake my head no. "You're going to go with Danny here. He's going to take you to our tape library and you're going to watch the last years worth of show and then you're going to start your job in a week. Now I don't care whether you have Christmas plans with your family." I don't. Grandma still won't invite me to any family gathering since that whole Ostrich incident. "Cancel them brother. Understand?"
"Yes sir, I got it."
"Good, because if you don't you're going to be in for a world of hell brother. Danny show him where the library is."

The ponytailed man walked me out into the hall and pointed to the door with a black and white copy of a video reel on it and then walked off. I walked down to the door and pushed it open. I looked at just how many tapes there were to watch.


I hear unemployment is nice this time of year...
<hr>

Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood
-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)

Prediction, comments, feedback, etc. welcome.

[angeldelayette]

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
At least there is one younger guy, right?

-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
The Champs are faces so it is likely that the heels go over here.

-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood
Sorry Lexa!

-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
Non Title favors the Challenger.

-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
Enygma is not losing here.

-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)
Bad guys go over here to continue the feuds.

[Dragonmack]

getting some serious deja vu with that last post J Silver :D

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
lets see, biggest star of your last opus vs someone who I don't think you even used past the first month. Wild guess who wins

-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
I know the tag division has never been a focus for you, but your current one must have you planning on never dealing with sobriety again.

-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood
I give it a month before the Giant Oak sightings

-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
non title between even competitors = champ losing

-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
except in the case of enygma, because he is worthless losing.

-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)
They'll win the match but be left laying as you don't need to have Umaga anymore. Strong brought in a local monster to fill that role much better for you.

[Nightshadeex]

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
Darryl gets the slow build.
-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
ToP is a good team that actually has a place to be pushed.
-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood
Needledick, needledick, needledick!
-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
By DQ for some reason.
-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
Got to have a little face love tonight.
-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)
Heels win to set up future stuff.

[BYU 14]

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
Youth carries the day

-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
TOP should be your top team

-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood
Timberrrrrr

-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
Sets up a title match and gives Belle a rub

-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
Even without the strap on the line gotta go Enygma

-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)
Win by DQ or some other means that keeps the Titans strong

[mistaken]

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood (giant redwood is still going to be your favorite guy to bury!)
-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)

[xopher316]

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine

-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power

-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood

-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden

-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackson

-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)

[SeanMcFly]

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
Darryl will probably dominate the old guy, as Captain can't wrestle at all.

-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
I'm a big fan of Danny Rushmore, and it seems logical to push them when I book them, so here's hoping

-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood
C'mon, at least one Old guy has to win right ?

-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
If I'm correct, Belle's a better wrestler, so you should push her

-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
Simple, push your better wrestler

-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)
Faces should win in the tag encounter while the Heel should win in the Singles (Providing it's a Justice / Baine feud you're going for

[MaxxHexx]

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood
-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)

[Bigpapa42]

-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood
-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)

[Jammy Dodger]

Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine
-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power
-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood
-Non-Title- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden
-Non-Title- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackosn
-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans (Baine & Rex)

[J Silver]

OOC: A show posted when I said it would be? Welcome to the new USPW.
<hr>
USPW: Where Ages 65 and Older Get Free Backstage Passes.

Sam Strong likes his groupies. On with the show.
<hr>

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/68AW.png
USPW American Wrestling
Wednesday, Week 1, January 2010
Held at The Washington State Gymnasium
Att. 2,000 (Sold-out)


Dark Matches


-In a match that had an average crowd reaction and some decent in-ring action, The People's Team defeated Anger and Andre Jones in 9:47 when Freddie Datsun defeated Anger by pinfall with a Patriot Press. (D+)


Main Show


We start off the first show of this quiet new era in USPW as Danny Jillefski, Shane Sneer and Sam Strong welcome everyone at home to USPW American Wrestling and assure everyone to the best of their acting skills that this is going to be a good show. Personally I have my doubts.


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/CaptainUSA.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Darryl-Devine-Heel.jpg
-Captain USA vs. Darryl Devine-

And what a better way to start off this supposedly exciting night than with one of our youngest, most talented up and comers facing off against ... a 51 year old with arthritis and Alzheimers. Sure to be action packed. The match starts with Devine taking aim at Cap's legs to immobilize him. Mission easily accomplished. Devine dominated from here showing a mean streak that the usually pessimistic competitor hasn't shown before. Devine lifted the dead weight back to his feet and plants him face-first into the mat with a Devine Dream Drop (RKO/Cutter). Devine made the pin and it was lights out for the Cap'n.

Winner: Darryl Devine in 6:19
Rating (D-)


-The match is over and Devine calls for a mic. The timekeeper hands him one and Devine kicks USA out of the ring.

DD: "When is enough enough? I've been with USPW for the last 7 years of my life. I've been with this damn company since 2004 and what do I have to show for it?! 7 years here and neither 'The Legendary' Sam Strong or Commissioner Doom think I'm worth more than a match with a man that needs a walker. I'm sick of this, I'm sick of being held back, I'm tired of meaning nothing to this company, I'm tired of everyone in charge around here being incompetent and enough is enough.

I have been with this company longer than Sam Strong, I've been here longer than Enygma, I've been busting my ass here longer than Baine. I have been putting my heart and soul into this company to help it to grow, to become what it's become. Every time I think that it's my time to have a chance in the spotlight someone comes along and steals it from me. I'm sick of seeing these has-beens come to USPW, the company I helped build and leech off of my hard work! Where were they when USPW was struggling? Where?! Where was Enygma when USPW could barely pay it's workers? He was collecting a big fat check from Eisen and when Eisen won't pay him what his ego thinks he's worth do you know what he does? He comes here, to the company I sweat to keep alive while he just shows up and collects a check.

Where was James Justice when USPW couldn't get a tv deal? He was happy to be with TCW, because he didn't have to do any of the heavy lifting. But then fail a drug test, just come to USPW. Where was Tyson Baine when USPW needed more star power? He was trying, unsuccessfully may I add to become TCW World Champion. TCW can't pay him the extravagant amount he demands? Come to USPW, they'll pay up! I've sat by and idly watched as these rejects from the big two couldn't hack it in their promotions, so they came here to leech off of Sam Strong's name and money. Let's take Andre Jones for example. The kid was a nobody in the SWF, all of a sudden he comes here, beats a few geriatrics a good decade past their prime and thinks he's hot sh*t. I got a message for you kid, you're still nothing.

And what about Bruce the Giant. SWF start hiring more giants and suddenly you're nothing special anymore so you come here thinking you'll beat up on geriatrics and midgets. Well Bruce, you're not so tall when you're staring up at the lights. Peter Valentine, how could we forget you ya narcissistic prick. Your tricks and your games wouldn't work in TCW anymore after everyone started to see you for what you are so you came here and got in Sam Strong's ear. You came to USPW where all of a sudden you were sadly enough considered one of the young up and comers. You can't wrestle for sh*t Peter and you won't be holding that National Championship for long. Jumbo Jackson, A joke in SWF you were and a joke here you still are shrimp. Let's not forget about Freddie Datsun now, SWF didn't want you and TCW wouldn't take you so what do you do? You come here. You come here and there goes Devine back to beating Captain USA for the millionth time!

Every time I think it's time for me to get my chance to shine, to prove myself one of you leeches shows up at our doorstep wanting to use this companies popularity and money for themselves, but never having earned a damn bit of it for themselves. I'm tired of it. I've been waiting for the last 7 years of my life! I'm tired of waiting! No more, no more will I sit by! No more will I let others decide my fate! No more will I wait around for my chance just to have another has-been take it away from me! No more!

USPW, prepare to face my Divinity."
(D)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Java.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/TribalWarrior.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DannyRushmore.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/MickMuscles.jpg
-Savage Fury vs. The Towers of Power-

Wow, this turned out a watchable. Color me thoroughly surprised. The match was nothing if not formulaic. The heels beat down the faces, the face made the hot tag, took control for a bit, but the Towers overpowered them in the end. Mick Muscles dropped Java with a Bulldozer Bomb and took the win for his team.

Winners: The Towers in 7:36
Rating (C-)


-The entrance music of USPW's Television Champion hits the speakers and out come Andre Jones. He struts down to the ring and grabs a mic.

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/AndreJones_alt.jpg

Jones: "Yo, listen up. I'm out here to prove a point right now, and that point is that Andre Jones is tha baddest man in this company and a fighting champion. Now I don't care what that punk Devine says, I ain't no nobody, I'm the TV Champion. That's why I'm out here. I'm issuing an open challenge for anyone who thinks they bad enough to take this belt from me to meet me in the ring next week and try to take my gold away from me. Andre Jones is the baddest mofo in USPW and I'll beat anyone to keep my gold. So next week anyone who wants a piece, come and get some. If you got the guts."
(D)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/NickyChampion_alt.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/GiantRedwood.jpg
-Nicky Champion vs. Giant Redwood-

And Champion ran circles around Redwood here. I mean that literally too, Champion unbalanced the super heavyweight by making him chase him. Champion wore down Redwood, not that that took long and then put him away with a Hawkeye Hammer to pick up another win.

Winner: Nicky Champion in 5:39
Rating (D+)


-Nicky Champion grabs a mic now and proceeds to call out the National Champion, Peter Valentine.

Champion: "Peter Valentine, I know you're listening to this right now so I'm going to come right out and say it, I challenge you to a match for the USPW National Championship at Frozen Dreams! You've gone far too long making a mockery of what that title is supposed to stand for, for the spirit of fair competition, for may the best man win, for honor. You're a disgrace to that belt and to this company Peter, and I'm going to do my mentor, Sam Strong a favor by ending that mockery. I won't let USPW have a weaselly coward like you as a champion anymore. At least come out here and face me like a man, Valentine."

Champion turns to the entrance way and waits for Valentine to come out and take him up on his challenge. Champion never sees it coming as Valentine sneaks through the crowd and slides into the ring behind Champion. Valentine slips his championship belt down off his shoulder and into his hand. He charges at Champion from behind. The stomping in the ring alerts Champion who turns around just in time to be clocked between the eyes with that shiny gold belt. Champion goes down like a sack of bricks. Valentine clutches the belt close to his chest as he trash talks a nearly unconscious Champion. Valentine picks up the mic and answers Champions question.

Valentine: "Not on your life, kid."

Valentine throws the mic at Champion and escapes back through the crowd before Champion can regain consciousness.
(C+, C)


-We go backstage now to see Shane Sneer, leader of Sneer Corp talking to someone. The camera pans out to reveal 'The Demon of The Deep' Baine. Sneers looks to be talking up Baine who happens to be managed by Sheik Mustafa, and it doesn't look like Sneer's just talking about the weather either.

Sneer: "Now do you know why you're not champion, Baine? Incompetent leadership. Mustafa can't manage worth squat and you'll never get anywhere with him."

Suddenly Sheik Mustafa runs in on this scene with T-Rex in tow, "Hey, hey, hey! What do you think you are doing Sneer?"

Sneer: "Just having a nice conversation with Baine here, not that it matters who he talks to."
Mustafa: "You stay away from him Sneer. Do not talk to him or else."
Sneer: "What are you Sheik, his mother? He's a grown boy, he can make decisions for himself. Isn't that right Baine?"

Baine just grunts.

Sneer: "See? He's a grown man, he can make his own decisions. You should make the decision not to concern yourself with this, things could happen to you. We wouldn't want that, now would we?"
Mustafa: "Your threats do not work on me Sneer, I see right through what it is you are trying to do and I will warn you, do not mess with me or my clients."

Sneer just chuckles at Mustafas threat. He takes out one of his business cards and hands it to T-Rex. Sneer walks past Mustafa stating to him "Sneer Corp gets what Sneer Corp wants."
(C-)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Enygma.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/JumboJackson.jpg
-Non-Title Match- Enygma vs. Jumbo Jackson w/ Shane Sneer-

Not a bad match at all here as Jumbo Jackson took on the mysterious World Champion, Enygma. Jackson used his power to try to keep Enygma down, but Enygma showed resilience and fought back hard against Rex. Sneer was there to intervene as much as he possibly could whenever Enygma would take control of the match. Enygma continued fighting back, but Jackson was able to nail him with a Jumbo Avalanche. The ref made the pin, 1....2..... rope break as Enygma gets his foot on the bottom rope.

Jackson celebrated in the ring thinking he'd just won the match. Sneer frantically tried to warn him that he hadn't won yet, but it was too late. Enygma sprang off the ropes and caught Jackson with an Enygmagiri Kick (Hard enziguri) that took the big man down and then locked in the Enygma Variation (Scissored Ankle Lock). Jumbo screamed in pain in the center of the ring. He tried to hold out, but couldn't as he tapped out giving Enygma another win.

Winner: Enygma in 12:12
Rating (C)


-And we're back after a word from our sponsor, Garys Good Gouda Cheese, it's full of homemade goodness. That means it's made in his mom's basement. Anyhow, we return from commercial to find Jumbo Jackson angry and throwing stuff around his lockerroom while yelling at Sneer because he didn't win his match against Enygma. Jackson is really destroying the room just taking his anger out on everything and berating Sneer who stands in the doorway unphased.

Jumbo: "I should've won that match Sneer! Why didn't I win that match, huh?! Where were you?! What the hell do I pay you for if you can't do that!?"

Jackson continues on like that until he runs out of things to break. Jackson unwittingly calms down now. Sneer puts his hand on Jacksons shoulder, "Let's go work out Jumbo and forget about what happened tonight, you'll get him next time."
(C-)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/RavenNightfall_alt2.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/WandaFish.jpg
-Non-Title Match- Raven Robinson vs. Belle Bryden-

A great women's match here as the Women's Champion faced off against the former champion here and they just seemed to click in the ring. Raven skipped out to the ring high-fiving the fans as she went, really wanting to give the fans their moneys worth. "The Beautiful" Belle Bryden however just flaunted to the crowd, teasing them. When she got into the ring she put her purse down in the corner, pulling a compact mirror out first and checking her make-up. As the bell rang Bryden got serious and went after Raven relentlessly. Bryden took control of the match and worked Robinson over, wearing down at her knee mostly trying to get her ready for a Blonde Ambition (Figure 4). Robinson fought back, but Bryden used any dirty tactic she could to keep Robinson down.

Eventually though Robinson caught a second wind and came firing back at Bryden. Brydens dirty tactics weren't enough as Robinson started to work over Belle now softening her up for a Night Crawler (Liontamer). Raven takes Bryden down with a Night Faller (Reverse DDT). She gets up and grabs her legs rolling her over into a Night Crawler. Belle screams in pain and crawls towards the ropes. It doesn't look like Bryden can hold out much longer in this move. Miraculously though she's able to hit the ropes and get the break from the ref. Bryden crawls towards the corner as the ref tries to get Robinson to let go of Bryden.

Robinson shoves him out of the way as she grabs a handful of hair from Belle. Bryden shoves her back, knocking her into the ref. Robinson goes right back for Bryden, but gets a face full of powder in her eyes for trying. Belle ditches the make-up in her purse and rolls Robinson up with a schoolboy grabbing a hand full of tights while she's at it. The ref crawls over and makes the count, 1....2....3.

Winner: Belle Bryden in 12:22
Rating (C)


-Bryden isn't done with simply winning the match, she wants to send a message. Belle gets out of the rings and wrestles the Women's championship belt away from the timekeeper. Bryden gets into the ring and lays in wait for the champion to get back to her feet. She doesn't get the opportunity though as Alicia Strong rushes down to the ring and slides in. She goes straight for Bryden who takes a swing with the title belt. Alicia ducks under it and rebounds off the ropes nailing Bryden with a dropkick. Bryden crawls away from Alicia and to her corner. Alicia follows after her, but she too gets a face full of make-up powder blown in her face. Bryden gets out of the ring and yells at Strong and Robinson that this isn't over. Alicia wipes the powder out of her face and helps Raven to her feet.
(D)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Liberty.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/ChrisCaulfield_alt1.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/TysonBaine.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/T-Rex_alt1.jpg
-James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. The Titans w/ Shiek Mustafa-

A pretty good match here with a great amount of heat. The faces fought hard against The Titans, but the two monsters of men overpowered them quite easily. Caulfield and Justice weren't so easy to give up and fought back against The Titans taking control of them by using quick tags and a surprising amount of teamwork. It didn't last though as Mustafa involved himself giving his Titans a distraction to capitalize on. From here Rex and Baine worked over Caulfield and Justice. Never during this match though did it look like The Titans were out for a win, just to punish the two faces.

Their appetite for destruction got the best of them though as Justice was able to get in a Justice Big Left Hand punch to the face as Rex showboated to the crowd. Justice crawled for his corner, but Rex held onto his boot trying to pull him away. Justice summoned the strength and made the tag to Caulfield who came in from the hot tag like a house of fire taking it to Rex and Baine, knocking them down multiple time and unleashing his arsenal of moves on them both. Justice was able to get back up to his feet and help out his partner. The two double teamed The Demon of The Deep for a good bit, but Baine fought back taking both men down with a double clothesline.

Showing impatience Rex hopped out of the ring and threw the timekeeper out of his seat and took the steel chair. He got back in the ring and nailed Caulfield over the head with it. The ref called for the bell giving the win to Caulfield and Justice by disqualification.

Winners: Justice & Caulfield by DQ in 15:24
Rating (C+)


-Of course The Titans couldn't stop at just one chair shot. Justice received one as he made it to his feet. The ref tried to stop The Titans from doing and further damage, but Baine just sets him up for a Hades Bomb. He gets ready to pick him up for it when the arena lights go out. On the tron appears the signature calling card of Enygma, a question mark. The lights come back on and Enygma stands behind Rex and Baine. Rex raises the chair above his head preparing to nail the World Champion, but Enygma gives him a thrust kick right to the chair propelling it back into his face. Enygma picks up the chair as Rex goes down and nails Baine over the head with it.

The chair is dented as he lifts it, but Baine is still standing. He roars at the World Champion challenging him to take another shot, which he does. Baine grabs the chair in mid-swing and rips it out of Enygma's hand. Baine tosses it and throttles Enygma by the neck. He lifts him up for a Chokeslam to Hell. He lets go as Caulfield nails him with that chair he tossed aside. Baine turns his attention to Caulfield now who nails him again. Baine falls to his knees this time. Caulfield looks to finish him off, but gets a Big Boot to the face courtesy of T-Rex. Justice is back up now and he goes after Rex. The two spill out onto the outside of the ring and start brawling though the fans as they leave the ring area.

Enygma helps Caulfield to his feet and the two punch and stomp away at Baine trying to keep the Demon down. They look like they may actually succeed before the entrance theme of one Bruce The Giant hits the speakers. Bruce stands atop the entranceway now. Caulfield grabs a chair and heads out of the ring taking the fight right to the giant. The two brawl their way backstage as just Enygma and Baine are left in the ring now. Baine reaches up and grabs Enygma by the throat. Baine makes his way back up to both feet and lifts the World Champion up into the air.

Enygma connects with an Enygmagiri Kick to Baines head. Baine falls to all fours and Enygma is quick to lock on an ankle lock. Before he can vine it Baine powers up and rolls through sending Enygma flying forward. Baine kicks Enygma in the gut as he stumbles into him. Baine sets up and connects with a Hades Bomb that looks like it breaks Enygma in half. Baine stands up and walks over to grab the World Championship belt that the now destroyed Champion brought out with him. Baine stares intently at the belt standing over the fallen World Champion as we fade to black.
(B-)


Final Rating (C)
Cable Rating (1.06)
-Well, could've been worse.

The Alzheimers Post Show Recap:

-Darryl Devine defeated Captain USA (D-)
-The Towers Of Power defeated Savage Fury (C-)
-Nicky Champion defeated Giant Redwood (D+)
-Enygma defeated Jumbo Jackson (C)
-Belle Bryden defeated Raven Robinson (C)
-James Justice and Chris Caulfield defeated The Titans by DQ (C+)

[grj1234]

Really glad you're back doing a dynasty. I'm actually doing a USPW dynasty myself soon and found myself actually am putting time into writing a story around TEW game for once in my life. I'm not sure what is it about USPW ... it's just a spectacular train wreck that one cannot ignore.

[J Silver]

Thank you for the comments and predictions everyone, they're always welcome.
getting some serious deja vu with that last post J Silver :DAnd plenty more deja vu moments to come too.
<hr>

How I Spent My Christmas Vacation


The dimensions of the room were about the size of a prison cell I'd say, then again I may be giving too much credit to this room. Bookshelves full of tapes lined the walls and opposite the door was a rinky dink little 19" tv that I'd assume is from before the turn of the century. Boy, Sam Strong sure knows how to treat his employees well. So, I'm stuck here until I've watched the last years worth of TV episodes and Events so I can familiarize myself with the product. Let's see, that's only about.... 102 hours worth of programming to watch this week. Crap, that really is going to take me all week. Faced with an insurmountable amount of work to do I did the only thing I could do.

I knocked on Mr. Strong's door before I entered, it's the polite thing to do, and then I walked in. Mr. Strong looked like he was in a business meeting with a cute blonde, some douchebag and a teenager. I later learned that was Alicia, Biff and PJ. I cleared my throat to grab their attention.

"If you're going to choke to death don't do it in my office brother."
"Just a question sir."
"What is it brother?"
"Am I getting paid for this?"
"For standing around in my office looking like an idiot?"
"No, I meant for watching that crapload of videos."
"You're salaried brother."
"Oh, so how much do I make a month?"
"However much I feel like paying you."
"Which is?"
"To be determined brother. Now get out of my office before I have Tiny throw you out."

Well, that wasn't particularly helpful. I figured if I'm stuck doing this I may as well make myself comfortable and grab some grub. I found vending machines some long ways down that damn hall. Can Strong really not afford to get those doors fixed? I took out my last dollar and pondered what to use it on. Normally I would just buy chips, but this machine was full things I've never even heard of. Dried fruit, a baggy of granola, Pita chips, All-natural non-meat meaty jerky, Organic cookies, a stick of celery, electrolytes-n-sh*t brand gummi bears, Vegan burgers (though those are just two buns and some ketchup), and a head of cabbage. It all looks so appetizing. I glanced over and noticed the janitor. Maybe he knows if any of this crap is good.

"Hey, janitor."
"I'm cleaning sir. I swear I am."
"... Yeah, okay. Anyhow, I was just wondering if any of the crap in this vending machine is any good."
"No, not really."
"Yeah, that's what I thought. Know anywhere I can get something good for a dollar?"
"I have an extra sandwich if you'd like."
"That would be great. I mean, if you don't mind of course."
"No, no, I'm full."

He hands me the sandwich. I look at it unsure of what kind of sandwich it is.

"Thanks Mr. ... uh... I didn't get your name."
"It's Nibbler, but my friends just call me Erik."
"Well thank you Erik. What's in this sandwich anyways."
"Cat."
"Cat?"
"Yes, cat. It goes well with a side of mouse intestine. I have some left over if you're interested."
"Ha, good one buddy. You had me going there. But seriously, what's in this?"
"Cat."

I don't think he's kidding.

"You know, actually I'm not really hungry anymore. Trying to watch my figure after all. You can have the sandwich back, you know, you may get hungry later and I wouldn't want you to be hungry." Because who knows who else you'll eat.
"That's okay, you can have it."
"That's quite alright. Here, here's the sandwich. I have a lot of work to do. I'll talk to you later Erik."
"I'm looking forward to it. I have so few friends." I wonder why.

I back away from Nibbler slowly, not wanting to turn my back on him until I round a corner. What the hell kind of place is this? Everyone here is either old, crazy, or just plain strange. Why can't I meet someone normal here? I'm still hungry too. Maybe I should just pass a bathroom door, that'll make me lose my appetite quick. I figured I'd probably be safest in the viewing cell, so I decided I'd make my way back there and get this misery over with. I walked down the hall looking up at the ceiling tile because I really don't want to be looking into most of these rooms and because I need to do something entertaining before I have to watch about 4 straight days worth of pro wrestling. Naturally I couldn't see where I was going, I figured everyone would probably just avoid me, they do normally. I bumped into someone who had their face buried in a book. We both fell onto our asses. The young, blonde haired kid got right back to his feet and extended his hand to help me up.

"Sorry, about that. I should probably be looking where I'm going."
"Yeah, I probably should too. Sorry."
"Hey, you're the new booker, aren't you?"
"Yup, Jacob Stranton's the name. And you are?"

It seemed like I struck a nerve with this kid. He just stared at me as his shoulders slumped down and his head hung low. In an exasperated tone he mumbled, "Great, I'm here seven years and you don't even know who I am. Wonderful." before walking off. I headed back to my viewing cell this time looking where I was going. I sat down in the chair and popped in the first tape, USPW American Wrestling, Wednesday January 4, 2009 and began my long journey into oblivion. And I'm still hungry.


On the bright side I only had 6,120 minutes left to go...
<hr>
Prediction Contest Results:

angeldelayette- 15 pt
Dragonmack- 18 pt
Nightshadeex- 9 pt
BYU 14- 18 pt
mistaken- 15 pt
xopher316- 18 pt
SeanMcFly- 15 pt
MaxxHexx- 12 pt
Bigpapa42- 12 pt
Jammy Dodger- 9 pt

So congratulations to Dragonmack, BYU 14 and xopher316, I'm obviously too predictable for them. Prediction contest prizes will be figured out whenever I figure them out. Suggestions welcome.
<hr>
Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling:

-USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c)
-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69)
-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ???
-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson
-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine

As usual 3 pts for correct winner, 1 pt for correct match rating and what the hell, 10 pts if anyone can get either of the ??? correct. (Here's your hint, they're new signings). Next show will probably be up on Saturday.
(Edit: Well, I'd like to see someone get the ??? so here's clue #2. The singles ??? was never in USPW: 65, both wrestlers in the tag team ??? however were featured in USPW: 65)

[ampulator]

I remember your shows in your first diary, and how craptastic the ratings were.

You're already pulling a C in 3 matches, and some D's. No E's so far. I won't be shocked if you get a B- pretty soon.

[Dragonmack]

USPW's main event is loads better than it was in '07. Of course, how could it not be. :p



-USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c)
'll guess Steve Flash, but only because everybody signs Flash.

-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69)
J-Ro is clearly the most talented here.

-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ???
the crystal ball tells me that they will be blonde...twins...famous father... I am going for the The Gauge Brothers

-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson
I think Caulfield ends up going north soon anyway so might as well job that overness now.

-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine
DQ win complete with complementary beatdown afterwards

[xopher316]

-USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c) (D)
I guess Steven Parker

-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69) (D+)
All very talented women, but J-Ro is the biggest of the bunch.

-Non-Title Match-The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ??? (D)
Going with Samoan Destruction Inc. because you can never have to many savages in USPW.

-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson (C)
Heads Caulfield, tails Jumbo. *Flips coin* Caulfield it is.

-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine (C+)
DQ, Titans beatdown, Enygma with the save.

[SeanMcFly]

-USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c)
-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69)
-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ???
-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson
-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine

[Nightshadeex]

-USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c) - D-
-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69) - D
-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ??? - D+
-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson - C-
-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine - C

The TV Title will be defended against... Tough, but Jack Griffith. (I just can't go with Steve Flash)
And I like Randall Hopkirk and BJ Shearer for the Tag Team...

I can't wait for T-Rex and Patrick Cool to be Negativity-Rex and Douche-Lad... I can't ****ing wait...

[angeldelayette]

USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c)
Steve Flash is the easy guess for the ??? but he still doesn't beat Mr. Volleyball!

-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69)
Because everyone needs a little 69.

-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ???
The People over the Nation of Filth.

-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson
Caulfield is definitely the better man.

-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine
Baine shot right up in my diary. I hope he can do the same for you!

[J Silver]

I remember your shows in your first diary, and how craptastic the ratings were.

You're already pulling a C in 3 matches, and some D's. No E's so far. I won't be shocked if you get a B- pretty soon.Yeah, I'm saddened that USPW isn't a complete joke here. I had plenty more jokes at the expense of the company I'm booking and what a vomit-inducing good time they are to watch to get out.
I can't wait for T-Rex and Patrick Cool to be Negativity-Rex and Douche-Lad... I can't ****ing wait...I hate to say this but I didn't actually make the connection of T-Rex and Negativity-Rex until just now. This gives me an idea...

<hr>

WHAT DID THE ARSEHOLES SAY?


6,120 minutes and one quite successful television show later here I am. In a bathroom stall. Writing the second show. On a roll of toilet paper. With a dry-erase marker. A pink one. It's sparkly. Not quite the way I envisioned things when Mr. Washburn said I was getting transferred. Doesn't matter, I'll have the last laugh when one of the major networks picks up my new pilot for 'The Adventures of Negativity-Rex & Douche-Lad.' When I haven't been forced to write a wrestling show I've been putting together a revamped script for it. No network will be able to say no to this gem.

As I worked feverishly at the new script the bathroom door opened wider and I heard the stall door next to mine open. I heard a familiar high-pitched voice come from the stall, "Hey, Mr. Strong wants to see you in his office right now."

"Yeah, yeah, I'll get there."
"He said now!" Tiny exclaimed.
"Okay, I'll get going. By the way, why didn't you just call me on one of these little Fisher-Price walkie talkies Sam insisted we have?"
"Cuz I gotta take a dump. Why the hell do you think I came all the way out here?"

And with that I moved surprisingly quickly to Mr. Strongs office. I opened the door and walked inside. Sitting at his desk was Mr. Strong, but by his side were Peter Valentine, Nicky Champion, Giant Redwood, Danny Jillefski and Alicia Strong.

"I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"
"No, brother, we were waiting for you before we started."
"So, what's this about? Why are we all here?"
"Why don't you shut your f***ing mouth and listen dipsh*t?" Easier said than done tubby.

"...So anyways, why are we here?"
"What the f*** did I just tell you needledick?"
"We're here Jay because I have a few expectations of you as my new head booker." Can't be much if you're accepting shows I wrote on toilet paper. Not even two-ply either.
"I wouldn't bother Mr. Strong, I won't be here long enough to fail whatever inane goals you have in mind for me."
"Oh really. And why is that brother?"
"Because it's only a short matter of time before my pilot gets picked up and I no longer have to work for you."
"I doubt that brother so listen up."
"And listen good you little prick."
"Jay, I'm giving you a list of goals that I want you to accomplish."
"And what if I don't?"
"Then I'll be very angry at you."
"You can't fire me, can you?"
"Washburn would pull American Wrestling from his programming."

"So basically you have no power over me."
"Yet, brother."
"Yet?"
"We were bumped back an hour by Sports America a few weeks ago by the Competitive Tooth Cleaning Triathlon." Ah yes, brushing, flossing and gurgling in a competitive environment. Sports Americas last failed experiment. Turned out a flossing fetish gave it a decent rating though. "USPW doesn't plan on doing business with Sports America for much longer. When USPW parts ways with Sports America what do you think happens to you?"
"I go back to working for Mr. Washburn of course."
"Wrong brother. You're an employee of mine now, Washburn wants you here so that you won't be there. We're stuck with each other brother, so get used to it."
"Well if I'm stuck here can I at least get a real office? My current one smells. Really bad."
"I'll think about it brother. Now to business."

"I could do business better in a real office."
"Your office was designed to do your business in. Now shut up and let Sam talk. Some of us have better things to do than hear you complain kid." Valentine chimes in.
"First goal for you is simple, I have plenty of my own money invested into USPW and plenty of investor money too."
"But it's only worth $10 million, a big star like you doesn't have more money than that?"
"Here's a lesson for you brother, don't let Rip Chord open a bar tab in your name. Now back to business I don't want USPW falling into debt at any time for any reason."
"I dunno, $10 mil ain't hard to waste nowadays."

"Second on my list involves Nicky and Peter. Both of them are important to the future of this company." The 46 year old without any measurable skill and on the verge of retirement is important to the future? Seriously? "That's why I don't want either of their momentums to fall below a certain level. Nickys better not fall below a B- and Peters better not fall below C+. Got it?"
"Umm... that's nice that you have letters for them and all, but, uh, how the hell am I supposed to know how I'm doing on that when you're just making the grades up?"
"Oh brother, don't you know anything?"
"I know my name."
"The grades come from the Adam Ryland Statistical Evaluation Honorable Online Library Explorer System."
"The Adam Ryland Statisti-whatchamajiget?"
"The Adam Ryland Statistical Evaluation Honorable Online Library Explorer System."
"That's a mouthful."
"Then just use the abbreviation brother."
"Which is?"
"ARSEHOLES, The ARSEHOLES."
"Oh, so we go by what The ARSEHOLES say? The ARSEHOLES provide the grades?"
"Yes. Now can we move on?"

"Yeah, sure, do what The ARSEHOLES tell me, got it."
"Next order of business, I don't want you to hire any psychopaths."
"Well, I guess I'll just cross Arkham Asylum off my places to scout."
"Moving on brother, my wrestlers are an investment which is why I don't want any of them getting hurt."
"Not because they're your friends or because they're fellow human beings?"
"I'm a businessman now Jay." Score one for market research. "Everyone's an investment."
"Even me?"
"No. Now to get to my point I don't want you hiring anyone with less than a C- in safety."
"Going by The ARSEHOLES, right?"
"Right brother."
"So don't hire anyone The ARSEHOLES think is unsafe. Got it, anything else?"

"Yes, I want workers who are in shape, ones that don't gas out after 5 minutes. The ones that can't go more than a few minutes are useless."
"Hey tubby, I think he's talking about you." I whisper to Redwood.
"Shut your f***ing mouth you worthless little dipsh*t! Don't ever call me fat!"
"Okay, sorry I offended you blubber nuggets."
"That's it! It's time I kicked you puny little ass f***wad!"

Redwood leaps off the couch as fast as his fat, little legs could carry him up to his feet. Jillefski immediately stands in front of him and tries to calm him down. After a few words Redwood plops back down onto the couch.

"Now as I was saying before you picked a fight brother, I don't want you hiring anyone with less than C- stamina."
"Okay, don't hire anyone The ARSEHOLES think is a fat, useless waste of space. Got it. Anything else?"
"No brother, that'll be all. Now get back to work. I better see the script for the next show on my desk before the end of the day."

With that I leave Mr. Strongs office and head back to my own. Luckily no one was using my stall when I got back. I got back to finishing up the next show, but couldn't help but hear and smell what I heard and smelt. "Tiny, are you still in there?" I asked. "Sh*t yeah, I got the runs bad." He replied.


Definitely not how I envisioned my first office...
<hr>
Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling:

-USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c)
-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69)
-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ???
-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson
-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine

3 pts for correct winner
1 pt for correct match rating
and what the hell, 10 pts if anyone can get either of the ??? correct. (Here's your hint, they're new signings).

Next show will be up on Saturday.

Well, I'd like to see someone get the ??? so here's clue #2. The singles ??? was never in USPW: 65, both wrestlers in the tag team ??? however were featured in USPW: 65

[Dragonmack]

well, in that case, i change the ???? to being Bryan Holmes, since he often gets let go by PGHW and he could be your new William Hayes, and for the ???? & ???? I am going to go with the old standby of Davis Wayne Newton and Cameron Vessey. Mainly because you wrote the funniest dialogue for their segments.

[BYU 14]

USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c)
No clue after that last clue, but sticking with Andre (D+)

-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69)
J-Ro seems the best of the lot (D-)

-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ???
I wil go with Vessey and Newton (D+)

-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson
He is just stronger at IMO (D+)

-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine
This is a coin flip to me, but the best match on the card (C-)

[Nightshadeex]

I then have to change my tag team from Paindul Procedure to...


The Dudez!!!1!!!

Because TBTTLE!!!!1!!1!!! won't be available.



And come on, really? You didn't put T-Rex and Negativity-Rex together?

[Jammy Dodger]

-USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c)
-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69)
-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ???
-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson
-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine

[ChrisKid]

Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling:

-USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c)-
Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69)
-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ???
-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson
-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine

[J Silver]

And come on, really? You didn't put T-Rex and Negativity-Rex together?Really. I didn't make that connection because the only thing they have in common is a similar name.
<hr>OOC: A show posted only a day after I said it would be? Hey, still a big improvement. Also, starting to try a few new things out with this show, just bare with me here.
<hr>USPW: Where a Heidenreich Entrant can get taken under the wing of ol' Cap'n USA.

Seriously. On with the show.
<hr>

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/68AW.png
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USPW American Wrestling
Wednesday, Week 2, January 2010
Held at The War Memorial Auditorium
Att. 2,000 (Sold-out)


Dark Matches


-In an extremely poor match, Mick Muscles defeated Biff Oakes in 7:53 by pinfall with a Bulldozer Powerbomb. (E+)

-In a bout that had great heat and good action, Enygma defeated Fumihiro Ota in 7:35 by submission with an Enygma Variation. (C+)


Main Show


-We kick off our live broadcast with Shiek Mustafa coming down to the ring. Oddly his Titans aren't with him.

Mustafa: "I have come out here tonight for a simple reason. Enygma, my Demon Baine has had your number for some time now and it is time that you accepted it. Put your title on the line against him at Frozen Dreams! Unless of course that is you know that you can't beat Baine, it would be about time for you to realize it anyhow. I want your answer now and I will wait in this ring until you have given it to me."

Mustafa just stands in the ring, eyes on the entrance ramp waiting to see Enygma make his way out to the ring and deliver his answer. Unfortunately for him the music that starts playing doesn't belong to Enygma.

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Shane Sneer makes his way out to the ring accompanied by Jumbo Jackson. Sneer steals the mic out of Mustafa's hands and speaks.

Sneer: "This is amateur hour at best Mustafa, not that I expect better from you really."
Mustafa: (Speaking into the mic in Sneers hand) "What do you want Sneer?"
Sneer: "Well, shieky, I thought that Baine should get a better understanding of what I can offer him."
Mustafa: (Again speaking into Sneers mic) "And what is that?"

Sneer: "The chance to be a winner, to be managed by someone who can manage him. There's no reason he shouldn't be champion already and no reason he shouldn't have a shot at the championship already. Unfortunately for him shoddy management has screwed him out of those opportunities already. I mean honestly Muatafa, telling the World Champion, a man who's behavior is a mystery to everyone to come out here, possibly to an ambush and say 'yes, I'll give the guy who's been beating my ass a shot at my precious belt.' is inane at best. That's the best you could come up with? Pathetic.

Fortunately I took the time to go to Commissioner Doom earlier today with a well prepared presentation on why Baine deserves a shot at Enygma's World Championship at Frozen Dreams! The Commissioner was more than accommodating and Baine will be challenging at the PPV. Now don't you feel stupid, not even keeping up with your own clients schedules. Sneer- 1, Mustafa- zilch. Now please, clear out of the ring, my client has a match."

Mustafa is clearly not happy as Sneer boots him from the ring.
(C-)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/ChrisCaulfield_alt1.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/JumboJackson.jpg
-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson w/ Sneer-

A good match from both of these men as Caulfield doesn't take Jackson too seriously. Jackson is vicious in his attack on Caulfield knowing he has something to prove to Sneer, to Caulfield and to anyone who calls him Shrimp. For the most part Jackson did control the match, though not without the help of Sneer. Caulfield was eventually able to overcome Jackson and take him down with a Danger Drop. He made the pin, only to see Sneer hop onto the apron and distract the ref. Caulfield got up and went over, punching Sneer and knocking him down before going and making the pin again, 1....2....3.

Winner: Chris Caulfield in 9:02
Rating (C)


-We go backstage now to the locker room of Nicky Champion. Champion is there with his mentors daughter, Alicia Strong. Strong looks to be trying to encourage Champion in his pursuit of the USPW National Championship. Champion isn't sure of how he's going to get Peter Valentine to put his belt on the line. Strong suggests going to either Doom or Daddy to try to get the match. Champion believes that would be a great idea, Sam wouldn't just turn down his student. Champion thanks Alicia when there's a knock on the door.

Champion: "Who is it?"
"Catering. We have the meal you ordered."
Champion: "We didn't order any meal."
There's silence for a moment before, "It was ordered as a gift by a Mr. Strong."
Champion: "Oh, well bring it on in then."

Champion opens the door and let's the man in with a cart inside. Champion and Strong look around at the cart, the meal, not so irresistible upon closer look. "This is what your dad sends?" Champion questions. Then a the cart rattles as out from under it comes Peter Valentine, who seems to have been hiding there the whole time. Before Champion can even grasp what the hell is going on Valentine smashes a plate over his head and jumps on him driving his fist over and over into Champions skull. Valentine screams at Champion "Give it up kid, you'll never get my belt!"

Alicia pleads to the deranged Valentine to get off of Nicky, but he's obviously not listening. Strong decides to take things into her own hands grabbing a plate from the cart and then smashing it over the back of his head. Valentine stops beating on Champion as he checks the back of his head for blood. Valentine gets up to his feet, "Daddy's Little Princess wants to save the prince, huh?" and then grabs Strong by the hair, "Let's see if you're so brave when I'm through with you."

"Get away from her!" Champion yells as he gets back to his feet and goes straight after Valentine. He grabs him and tosses him backwards causing Valentine to trip over the food cart and tumble out the doorway. Valentine gets back to his feet, "I ain't done with you yet Champion!" he says before high tailing it out of there. Champion runs out into the hallway and yells to Valentine, "Good, because you just made this personal Valentine!"
(C)


-Andre Jones makes his way down to the ring and grabs a mic.

Jones: "Well, well, looks like everyone's too chicken to face off against 'The Baddest' Andre Jones, now don't it. I left this open challenge sign-up sheet in a heavily trafficked area for close to a week not a single signature right here on these dotted lines. I'm a fighting champ and I don't got no one to fight. This proves it people, everyone is afraid to face off against tha baddest man in USPW, me. So, with that outta the way I got some celebratory parties to hit up tonight. Peace out."

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Jones drops the mic and prepares to leave the ring when he realizes that's not his entrance music playing. He looks up at the entranceway to find a Samoan man standing there. He picks the mic back up and starts trying to talk his way out of this.

Jones: "Hey, who the hell are you? No, you know what if you're out here because of the open challenge I hate to break it to ya pal, but you didn't sign this official entry form. You don't have a match, so why don't you scram before I show you why everyone else 'round here is too afraid to sign up for a match against Tha Baddest."


The Samoan makes his way down to the ring as Jones berates him trying to get him to go away. He gets into the ring and Jones prepares for a fight. The Samoan raises his open hand and swipes at Jones snatching the clipboard out of his hand. He signs it and shoves it back into Jones hand.

Jones: "Uh uh, hell no! You didn't make the deadline, you didn't follow the rules."

The Samoan now grabs the mic from Jones other hand.

"Allow me to introduce myself, my name is Toa and I've come to challenge you for your Championship. My apologies for not signing your form sooner, but I was unable to locate it."

Jones tries snatching the mic out of Toa's hand, but fails. He grabs another from the timekeeper.

Jones: "That's very nice Toe, but I was quite clear on the rules and if we don't got rules what do we got, right? Am I right? Of course I'm right, so sorry, no match."
Toa: "I thought you said you were a fighting champion."
Jones: "I am a fighting champion, the only real fighting champion in this company."
Toa: "Then what's the problem? Are you afraid to face me?"
Jones: "What? Hell no, I ain't afraid of you, I ain't afraid of no one, no how. I'm Tha Baddest for a reason."
Toa: "Then It's settled, the bell will ring and we will commence our match."
Jones: "I'ma beat your ass. Thinking I'm chicken..."
(D-)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/SamoanMachine.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/AndreJones_alt.jpg
-USPW Television Championship Match- Toa vs. Andre Jones-

(To anyone who doesn't recognize the picture, yes, Toa is Samoan Machine. And in case anyone is wondering toa is Polynesian for warrior)

This wasn't much of a competitive match. The Samoan Warrior Toa dominated most of the match catching Jones by surprise with his arsenal of moves. Toa struck quick and struck hard before locking on an Unbreakable Sleeper and forcing the champion to submit. Toa breaks the hold and claims his prize, the USPW Television Championship on his first night.

Winner and NEW Television Champion: Toa in 7:50
Rating (D)


-A new theme hits the speakers and out comes Darryl Devine, a changed man from recent weeks.

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Devine heads to the ring and grabs a mic. He lifts it up to speak, but is cut off by the familiar theme of Jim Force. Force runs out to the ring and then runs around it for a few laps before sliding into the ring and shaking the ropes wildly as the fans cheer him on. Force then extends his arm and points a finger at Devine as the crowd boos. Force then tries to speak into his hand before realizing he didn't get a mic on his second lap. He slides out of the ring and grabs a mic, does a lap and then slides back into the ring.

Force: "DEVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE!!!!!!!!!!!!1 YOU DASTARDLY, DISRESPECTFUL, DISAVOWED, DEPRAVED DEGENERAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTEEEEE!!!!! THE FOOOOOOOOOORCE IS A FOOOOOOORCE AMONG FOOOOOOOOORCES!!!! THE FOOOOOOOOOOOORCE IS A GUDING LIGHT IN THE DARKEST NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!!!!!!! THE FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORCE DOES NOT CONDOOOOOOONE YOUR BEHAVIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUR!!!!! BUY MY MERCHANDISE. APOLOGIZE FOR YOUR WOOOOOOOOORDS OR PREPARE TO FEEEEEEEEL THEEEEEEEEE FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORCE!!!!! !!!!!"

Devine: "What the hell did you just say? Seriously, what the hell are you talking about. Plain English out of you would be nice for a change of pace."
Force: "APOLOGIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-"

And just as Force is about to finish his word he gets jumped from behind by two young men. Devine stands by and watches as Force gets stomped by the two.

Devine: "Too bad the force can't stand up to my Divinity. What a shame. Allow me to introduce you to my partners, Cameron Vessey and Davey Wayne, also known as The Hotshots. Take care of him boys."

Wayne and Vessey continue to beat on Force as Devine joins in on the attack. As Devine and Wayne continue stomping Vessey pats down Force and then looks in his boot. Wayne questions what he's doing, the camera picking up the conversation.

Wayne: "Cam, what the hell are you doing?"
Vessey: "Looking for his wallet, I need some money ASAP. Those sharks don't have much in the way of patience, but plenty in the way of braindead muscle."
Wayne: "He doesn't have a wallet on him."
Vessey: "And how would you know?"
Wayne: "Because they don't give wallets to people in looney bins."
Vessey: "Why not?"
Wayne: "They'd choke on them."
Vessey: "What? To choke on a wallet you'd have to be pretty stu.... Yeah, good point."

As Vessey puts Forces boot back on out to the ring come Freddie Datsun and Des Davids, The Peoples Team. Divinity bails out of the ring as TPT check on Force. Datsun asks for a mic.

Datsun: "Now I don't know who you think you are all of a sudden Devine, but I don't much like seeing you come out here and beat up on people verbally or physically."
DD: "Well now ain't that just kindly of you? Thinking you can come out here, end my fun of beating up on another has-been who's been holding me down and then think there won't be consequences. Well, Freddy if you want to protect your fellow has-been so badly then why don't you take his place? Why don't you and your lackey there take on The Hotshots, they'd really like to beat up a has-been tonight."
Vessey: (Speaking into Devine's mic now) "Yes, we would like to kick your asses and we will, but I just have a quick question. Are either of you by any chance carrying your wallets on you at the moment?"

Devine shoves Vessey away from the mic, "Get out of here you little pest. So now, what's it going to be Freddie."
Datsun: "Ah never been one to back down from a challenge Devine. You got a match."
(E+, E+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DesDavids.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FreddieDatsun.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DavisWayneNewton_alt.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/CameronVessey_alt2.jpg
-The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) W/ Force vs. The Hotshots (Wayne & Vessey) w/ Devine-

This match was surprisingly even as The Hotshots gave The People's Team a run for their money. Using quick tags and cheap tactics The Hotshots were able to gain control of the match and work over Davids as Datsun cheered him on trying to get him to make the tag. Davids was able to make it and Datsun rolled over the Hotshots as he got in. From here the match was all TPT as The Hotshots couldn't take on Datsun.

Devine, growing frustrated that his team was getting their asses handed to them took matters into his own hands. He snatched up a steel chair from ringside and got into the ring. He nailed Datsun over the head with a chair taking him down. Davids rushes over to stop Devine, but The Hotshots grab hold of him and give Devine a clear shot. The bell rings as the ref calls for the DQ and Devine plants the chair into Davids face.

Winners: The Peoples Team by DQ in 8:12
Rating (D)


-Devine looks back to Datsun now. He raises the chair over Datsun's head and prepares to drive it down for one final blow. As he comes down with it he's tackled to the ground by a man Sneer recognizes as Steve Flash. The Hotshots go to help their boss out, but Jim Force is back in the ring and takes them down with a double clothesline. Flash starts driving his fist down into Devine as he has him on the mat now. Devine kicks Flash off and slides out of the ring to recover.

Devine yells at the timekeeper to ring the bell, which he does. Looks like we're going to be treated to this impromptu match.
(D)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/SteveFlash.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Darryl-Devine-Heel.jpg
-Steve Flash vs. Darryl Devine-

Devine slides into the ring now and gets nose to nose with Flash. Devine throws a right hand Flash's way, but Flash gets out of the way and takes Devine to the mat with an arm drag. Devine is surprised at how quick the old man still is, but he's quick to get over it and get focused again. The match is a back and forth affair from here as Flash and Devine exchange holds, Devine still surprised to see Flash keep up with him and even out-do him. Knowing that he won't be able to out-wrestle him Devine turns the match into a fight, a tactic which takes Flash by surprise.

From here Devine takes control of the match and wears Flash's neck down softening him up for a Devine Dream Drop. Devine goes for the 3D, but Flash shoves him off still showing some fight left in him. Devine springs off the ropes and Flash picks him up looking for the Flash Bang, but Devine catches him with a knee to the face. Flash stumbles back and Devine catches him with another Devine Dream Drop. He makes the cover, 1....2....3.

Winner: Darryl Devine in 9:10
Rating (C-)


-We go backstage now to see Commissioner Doom walking down the hall. Keeping up right alongside him is a clearly flustered Bell Bryden.

Bryden: "This is bullsh*t Doom, this is bull. Even you in your crazy little world you know it. I pinned the champion a week ago and you're going to have the nerve to tell me I'm not getting a Championship Match? That these four undeserving bitches are going to compete for what's rightfully mine? Explain yourself you senile old fart! I said explain yourself! Are you listening to me?"

Doom suddenly stops dead in his tracks and turns to Bryden.

Doom: "Conflabit, Do you know what's bull?"
Bryden: "What?"
Doom: "Bull!"
Bryden: "What?"

Doom then continues walking down the hall. Bryden just stands there confused, though the confusion just quickly turns to frustration. Bryden looks up onto the wall to see a poster of Robinson with the Women's Championship. Belle tears it down and crumples it up. She tosses it onto the floor and stomps on it in a fit of anger.

"Guess even you can't get everything you want, huh? About time you learned that lesson Belle."

Bryden's attention now turns down the hall as she sees Alicia Strong standing there. She takes the crumpled poster from under her feet and tosses it at Strong, Strong dodging it.

Bryden: "And what would you know about not getting something you want? You're daddy's Little Princess, you get everything you want and you know it, so don't try to lecture me."
Strong: "You always have been ungrateful for everything my dad's given you, like a job., title shots, etc."
Bryden: "And I bet you've always been jealous of that, especially when I won the title from you, haven't you?"
Strong: "No. Unlike you I welcome competition."
Bryden: "And I'd introduce my fist to your face, but I've got a title to get back."
Strong: "No you don't. Raven's going to face the winner of the 4-way, not you. You're free for Frozen Dreams!, so what do you say? Not afraid to lose are you?"
Bryden: "You're on."

Strong turns to leave now. Bad idea. Bryden smacks her in the back of the head with her purse and Strong goes down.

Bryden: "And this time I'm going to make sure you stay out of my business permanently Princess."
(C, D+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/JoanneRodriguez_alt2.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Sara-Marie-York.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/SuzanneBrazzle1.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/ZoeAmmis.jpg
-Women's #1 Contendership Match- Joanne Rodriguez vs. Miss York vs. Brazzles vs. Tatiana-

The Women's Champion, Raven Robinson comes down to the ring before the match starts and joins the announce team.

A competitive match between these four unknown women indeed this was. I don't really feel like going into detail here as it was quite fast-paced, so I'l cut to the end. Rodriguez plants Tatiana with a J-Rocker (Twist Of Fate, I believe) and makes the cover. Miss York breaks it up at 2. York lies in wait for J-Ro setting her up for an Energy Burst (Shining Wizard). As she launches herself she's caught by a clothesline from Brazzles. J-Ro gets up to her feet and is caught by the Miracle Connection (Super Kick). Brazzles makes the pin, 1....2....3.

Winner: Brazzles in 8:37
Rating (C)


-Brazzles celebrates her win in the ring as the Women's Champion gets up from the announce table and gets into the ring to congratulate the challenger. Robinson raises Brazzles hand in victory and then offers to shake her hand. Raven extends her hand to the challenger. Brazzles looks at it for a moment with the same smile on her face as she's had the whole time. She reaches down and shakes her hand. As their hands are locked Robinson lets people have a moment to get photos.

She then screams as she finds Brazzles pull her hand towards her and bites her arm. Raven pulls her arm away quickly after that and just looks at Brazzles puzzled, Brazzles still wearing that same smile on her face as though she didn't just bite the champion.
(D+)


-James Justice is backstage in the interview area now about to be interviewed about his upcoming match with 'The Demon From The Deep' Baine.

Seduction: "Thank you for your time James."
Justice: "No problem dudette. Always a pleasure."
Seduction: "Now you and Baine have wrestled before and he's come out on top. What do you plan on doing to prevent that from happening again?"
Justice: "Well, Baine is one tough dude, no doubt. And he's usually like all demonic and that kinda throws you a little, but I'm used to him now. I bet he's really just a big softie under all that hatred and demonicness and stuff."
Seduction: "Really?"
Justice: "Totally. As far as tonight goes I'm gonna go out there and do what I do best, wrestle. Then when I win I'm totally throwing a party for it. You're invited dudette. Ah, what the heck, everyone's invited, even you Baine. Just ya know, try not to shoot fireballs at people again, that's really not cool dude, not cool."
(B+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Liberty.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/USPW/USPWVS.pnghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/TysonBaine.jpg
-James Justice vs. Baine w/ Mustafa-

I think Justice really may have gone into this match with the theory Baine was just a big softie underneath all the rage, and demonicness, and brute strength. Baine charged right out of his corner at the opening bell taking Justice nearly out of his boots with an animalistic spear. He mounts himself on top of Justice and drives his fists right into Justices face. The ref has to try to pull Baine away, just making the Demon even angrier. Baine pulls Justice up to his feet by his throat. Baine doesn't let go and raises him into the air dropping him down with a Hades Bomb (Double Handed Choke Bomb). Baine makes the cover,

1

.
.
.

2

.

.


.


And Justice gets hims shoulder up just in time. Baine is furious, even more so anyways. From here Baine just destroys Justice, Justice looking like a rag doll as The Demon From The Deep tosses him around the ring. Justice tries fighting back, but Baine doesn't let up even for a moment. Justice gets desperate as Baine takes him up for another Hades Bomb. Justice fights back though as if he's fighting for his life, which he very well may be. Justice drives his knee up into Baine's chin. The demon drops him back to his feet, though won't let go of his throat. Justice drives his hip into Baines gut repeatedly until he lets go. Justice goes for a Justice Big Left hand which connects to Baine. He wastes no time now in going for the Liberation Slam. He struggles to get Baine's weight up, but he does slamming the Demon down onto the mat.

Justice makes the pin,


1

.
.
.

2

.

.


.

And Baine tosses Justice off of him. Justice is surprised as he sees Baine just sit up after that (a la Kane or Taker). Justice goes for another Justice Big Left, but Baine catches him by the throat and takes him down with a Hades Bomb. Baine makes the cover,

1

.
.
.

2

.

.

.


3.

Winner: Baine in 15:20
Rating (C+)


-Baine isn't done with Justice just yet though. Mustafa and Rex get into the ring now, Rex joins Baine in attacking Justice while Mustafa yells to destroy him. Baine sets Justice up to receive another Hades Bomb when the lights in the arena go out. On the tron appears the Question mark that signals the arrival of Enygma. The lights come back up and Baine expects to see Enygma standing in front of him, ready to be destroyed. Instead he finds Justice gone and Enygma carrying him up the entrance ramp. Baine is angry as he roars for Enygma to come back and fight him. Enygma though just points to his head indicating that he's outsmarted The Titans. He carries Justice to the back as Baine looks ready to burst inside the ring, Rex and Mustafa getting out of there themselves.
(B-)


Final Rating (C)
Cable Rating (1.01)
-Hmm, looks like our angles didn't reach the same standard set by our matches.
-Which is odd to me.
-This is USPW after all.


Post Show Recap Brought To You By: The ARSEHOLES, telling you what you should think since forever:

-Chris Caulfield defeated Jumbo Jackson (C)
-Toa defeated Andre Jones to win the USPW Television title (D)
-The People's Team defeated The Hotshots by DQ (D)
-Darryl Devine defeated Steve Flash (C-)
-Brazzles defeated Joanne Rodriguez, Miss York and Tatiana (C)
-Baine defeated James Justice (C+)

[ampulator]

HOLY CRAP, THAT women's match got a C?! Didn't women's matches in your old USPW get E's and D's?

[J Silver]

well, in that case, i change the ???? to being Bryan Holmes, since he often gets let go by PGHW and he could be your new William Hayes, and for the ???? & ???? I am going to go with the old standby of Davis Wayne Newton and Cameron Vessey. Mainly because you wrote the funniest dialogue for their segments.While I don't see Holmes being my new Hayes, he would need a little thing called charisma for that role, I wouldn't mind signing him when he does get let go. And of course you were correct about The Hotshots. Shame they have no chemistry together in this game.
Because TBTTLE!!!!1!!1!!! won't be available.I think you may be the only person who's ever gotten that acronym right.
HOLY CRAP, THAT women's match got a C?! Didn't women's matches in your old USPW get E's and D's?I was surprised too. And I can't recall ever having two women wrestle each other 1-on-1 in USPW: 65, save for 1 dark match I believe.
<hr>
Prediction Contest Results:

Dragonmack- 10 pt
xopher316- 7 pt
SeanMcFly- 9 pt
Nightshadeex- 0 pt
Angeldelayette- 9 pt
BYU 14- 13 pt
Jammy Dodger- 12 pt
ChrisKid- 6 pt

And BYU 14 comes in 1st once again. Congratulations.

MTD Standings:

BYU 14- 31 pt
Dragonmack- 28 pt
xopher316- 25 pt
Angeldelayette- 24 pt
SeanMcFly- 24 pt
Jammy Dodger- 21 pt
mistaken- 15 pt
MaxxHexx- 12 pt
Bigpapa42- 12 pt
Nightshadeex- 9 pt
ChrisKid- 6 pt

As far as a monthly prize goes I'm thinking of using what I was going to use for my FD! predictions contest winner in USPW: 65(which btw James Casey was able to win and if he'd like to claim his prize he's welcome to.) Winner at the end of the month can write any segment (with a few exceptions) they'd like in this dynasty. Or I'll write a segment of their choice in their dynasty. Or something like that. I don't know, I'm just throwing things out there. Maybe you'll just get some Jim Force Body Spray (http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d105/jsilver536/ForceSpray.jpg)®. Suggestions still welcome.
<hr>
Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling

-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)
-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey
-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne
-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant
-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden
-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine

3 pts for correct winner
1 pt for correct match rating.

OOC: For anyone who's wondering, Biff Oakes is my new Heidenreich challenge entrant. And also for some reason Captain USA became his mentor, which is going to make it harder to fire the old bastard. Anyhow, his introductory post will be up tomorrow, next show will be up Wednesday.

[Dragonmack]

TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)

-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey

-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne

-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant

-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden

-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine

[1PWfan]

-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)
Whilst I don't much care for Toa (he feels too much like a recycling the powerful samoan thing from last time), Anger is not the man to beat him

-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey
Whilst I'm not really welcoming Vessey and Wayne back (again, feels too much like recycling) I do like Vessey as a worker, and with the right character he can really shoot up the card

-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne
Datsun is endlessly reliable, a strong guy backstage and, most importantly, not some bloody annoying Canuck upstart that everyone pushes solely because he's talented

-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant
Nicky needs his mullet back (seriously, I really hate the shaved head alt, it takes away all his character), but he is one of your best future stars, and deserves a win here

-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden
I've found that Alicia's kind of a massive pain in the backside in '10, so I tend to job her out on general principle

-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine
Because Caulfield was born to put over monster heels

[xopher316]

-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c) (D)

-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey (D-)

-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne (C-)

-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant (C)

-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden (C)

-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine (C+)

[MaxxHexx]

-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)
-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey
-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne
-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant
-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden
-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine

Left side FTW!

[Bigpapa42]

-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)
-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey
-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne
-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant
-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden
-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine

[Jammy Dodger]

-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)
-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey
-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne
-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant
-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden
-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine

[Nightshadeex]

Wow, I really pulled a zero... I don't think I can play prediction contest anymore.

[J Silver]

Wow, I really pulled a zero... I don't think I can play prediction contest anymore.Going against the logical choices has never stopped you before, why let it now?
Whilst I'm not really welcoming Vessey and Wayne back (again, feels too much like recycling)I admit that while I've tried not to do it too much I have 'recycled' a few things things between this and USPW: 65. The Hotshots though were always going to be one of them. They were easily my favorite segments to write for and I would've brought them in no matter what promotion I did next. As for my point, I will probably recycle a decent number of characters, I won't however be recycling storylines. Now that would just be lazy.
<hr>
Meet Biff. He Thinks He's A Wrestler.


My office, a bathroom stall. I am a king in my own world sitting atop my porcelain throne. Listening as that bean burrito just made its way through one of my subjects. I'm like King Midas, but I don't have a gold touch. I have a Hell Touch, everything I touch seems to go to Hell. And believe you me, I touch myself a lot. I've adopted a new technique for writing my newer and even more improved pilot for 'The Adventures of Negativity-Rex & Douche-Lad', writing it on toilet paper. Hey if The ARSEHOLES think it works on my wrestling booking then maybe it will for my regular writing, right? I really feel this one is going somewhere. "Hey, you got any toilet paper in there?" The next stall asks. "No, I'm fresh out." I reply as I see a hand creep under the divider and feel around. It grabs my newest script as it lay there on the ground. "What the? Hey, no! Let go of that!" I yell out as 'The Adventures of Negativity-Rex & Douche-Lad' finds its way into the next stall. A few moments later I hear the toilet flush, "Thanks man, you're a lifesaver."

And just like that my newest pilot has been sh*t on and flushed down the drain. I don't see how this day could get much worse. It will, I just don't see how. My phone rings, It's Mr. Strong. Suddenly it's like I have a crystal ball into how this day is going to get worse. I answer the phone and get the usual, 'be in my office asap brother' from him. I sit up from my throne and leave my kingdom, not before cracking open a window though, my kingdom isn't too pleasant to the nose.

I arrive at Mr. Strongs door, still the only one in this building that closes, and walked in. I'm greeted by that blonde douchebag I've seen following Alicia around this whole time, "You smell like sh*t bro." "Why don't we just step into my office and I'll give you a nice explanation of why." I retaliate. "Play nice brother." Sam suggests, as though I actually would play nice.

"Why am I here Sam? I turned in the show already." And none too soon either, otherwise that may have gone down the drain. "Oh, and before I forget, the bathroom needs more toilet paper."
"Then tell Nibbler, do I look like the janitor to you brother?"
"Well, I mean if your wrestling career hadn't worked out I could see you as a janitor."
"Shut up brother."
"Daddy, please. Remember your blood pressure."
"Sorry muffin. Anyhow brother, there is a reason I called you here." I'd hope so, I don't like leaving my kingdom unattended. Nibbler might clean up the crumb mine and then what would I have to barter with the ants? What, I ask of you? The ants could rebel against me, my kingdom could go to war, the spiders would surely join the ant forces against me and.... I think the fumes in there are getting to me. "Got it brother?" I hear as I rejoin reality.
"Huh? What?"
"Dammit brother!"
"Daddy, no."
"Sorry muffin."
"What daddy is trying to say is that he's signed Biff to a contract."
"Yeah, a nice fat contract. I even got me a mentor to teach me about how to wrestle and stuff."
"Captain USA was nice enough to volunteer to be Biffs mentor." Probably because he thinks I won't fire him now. That old bastard's going to be in for a surprise.
"Yeah, so I'm going to learn how to do stuff in the ring."
"Biffs amazing on the mic, he's so charismatic." Guess that explains how this douche was able to get with Alicia Strong and get her father to sign him.
"Yeah, so I'll learn how to wrestle in a ring instead of just in the sack, oh yeah!"


Biff laughs at that and then starts making out with Alicia. I peer over at Sam, he doesn't look like he's enjoying this public display of affection. Sam clears his throat, very loudly and Alicia finally pushes Biff away from her.

"Right, so me and daddy are sure Biff is going to be a huge star. That's why we want you to push him to the main event."
"Yeah, I'll be the gold champion before you know it stinky." Gold champion? Seriously?
"USPW World Champion moron!" Sam yells at him.
"Whoa, sorry bro, Worlds champ. I got it now."
"Muffin, why don't you and Biff step outside so that I can talk to Jacob alone."
"Alrighty, catch ya later gramps, stinky."


Alicia and Biff step outside and Sam let's out a sigh of relief.

"What a douchebag brother."
"Glad I'm not the only one who thinks so."
"I can't believe she wound up with someone like that. I thought I taught her right."
"Well, everyone goes after someone who's totally wrong for them every once in a while."
"Yeah, except the father usually doesn't have to pay out a contract if they break up just to keep him away."
"Wow, you really are living in the 50's, aren't you? So anyhow, that whole thing about making him World Champion-"
"Or gold champion by that moron's definition brother."
"We're not going to make him World Champion, are we?"

"We are brother."
"Oh good, I though I was going to have to push- Wait, what? Did you say we are?"
"We are brother."
"Why?"
"Because it'll make my little muffin happy brother."
"You can't be serious Sam."
"I am. Now get out of here brother. Go start writing the next show, and find a way to work in Biff."


I exit the office and start walking down the hall back to my throne. I stop as I see Biff and Alicia making out in the middle of the hallway. I look around for a moment, the secretary just winked at me. I try walking past the two lovebirds, "Yo, stinky!" Crap.

"Hey, Biff, what's happening?" I ask faking politeness as best I can.
"That's happening." He say pointing at Alicia. "Oh yeah!"
"That's great. I'm just going to be off to my office. I'll see you guys around."
"Hey babe, why don't you go make me a sandwich, me and Stinky got some business to talk about."
"Okay hon, what do you want on it?"
"I dunno, surprise me. Now skedaddle, the men are trying to talk business."

Alicia leaves to go get Biff a sandwich while I'm left alone with the douchebag.

"Can you believe that Sam actually called me a moron? Can you believe that?"
"Yeah, the nerve of that guy." To think something that's completely true.
"I know, right bro? So anyways, I figure that once I become gold champion I should start doing some media tours, get on some shows like famous people do." I'm sure the producers of MTV's Real World would just love you. "Stuff like that, you know bro? So I want you to get me some contacts for agents, good ones."
"Yeah, I'll get right on that."
"Good, that way this place'll be a gold mine once I marry Alicia and her daddy croaks. Right, bro? High five!" I weakly give the douchebag a high five so that he might leave me alone.

Alicia comes back now with a sandwich for Biff.

"All they had was peanut butter and jelly. Hope that's okay."
"Yeah, I'm not hungry anymore babe. Now come here and give papa some sugar."

The two make-out once again and I head back to my kingdom. Belle Bryden passes by before I leave and I catch a glimpse of Biff looking at her rear as he continues to make out with Alicia. Classy.


I think I may have found my Douche-Lad...
<hr>Yes, Biff will be my Heidenreich this time around, not Giant Oak. For anyone who doesn't know what the Heidenreich Challenge is, you can read up on it here: http://www.greydogsoftware.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12642
<hr>
Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling

-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)
-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey
-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne
-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant
-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden
-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine

3 pts for correct winner
1 pt for correct match rating.

Still looking for suggestions or feedback on the monthly prediction contest prizes. Show will be up tomorrow.

[Astil]

I was seriously expecting Biff to pull a 'smell ya later' as you left. Shame.



-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)
[D-]
-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey
[E+]
-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne
[D]
-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant
[C+]
-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden
[C]
-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine
[C]

[Nightshadeex]

Going against the logical choices has never stopped you before, why let it now?

Ahhh, you're right, I should be able to get one or two this time! Hey, and where's Giant Redwood? He should be squashing someone.


-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)
I hope you don't job the new champ.
(D+)

-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey
If the Datsun match was first, I'd play this one differently, but otherwise, the Hotshots are losing to make Darryl pissed at them and push them forward.
(D)

-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne
I'm seeing a clean sweep, unless this match goes on before Des and Cam, then Cam is winning cheaply.
(D+)

-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant
Bruce is still Bruce, Nicky should look good, but not good enough.
(C-)

-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden
The face chicks are going to pick up the win here, fo shizzle.
(C)

-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine
If Caufield is going to lose to someone, it's going to be Baine, and then Baine is going to beat the crap out of someone.
(B-)

[BYU 14]

Lets see if I can keep this train rolling :)

TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c) (D+)

-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey (C-)

-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne (D)

-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant (D+)
Always bet on big

-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden (C-)
This team is unbeatable....for now

-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine (C)
Can't give Chris this one

[GruntMark]

-TV Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)
D rating.

-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey
D+ rating

-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne
D+ rating

-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant
C- rating

-Raven Robinson & Alicia Strong vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden
C rating

-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine
C rating

[J Silver]

Ahhh, you're right, I should be able to get one or two this time! Hey, and where's Giant Redwood? He should be squashing someone.He's in the middle of a gimmick change (http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Redbeard.jpg) right now.
I was seriously expecting Biff to pull a 'smell ya later' as you left. Shame.I'll make sure he gets it in next time.
<hr>
http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/68AW.png
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USPW American Wrestling
Wednesday, Week 3, January 2010
Held at Grissom Auditorium
Att. 2,000 (Sold-out)


Dark Matches


-(Bet you wish you knew what went on here Dark match) (C)

-(Superdy-duper ultra top secret classified Dark Match) (C+)


Main Show


-We kick off the show as "The Hardcore American" Chris Caulfield makes his way out to the ring. Caulfield makes his way out to the ring through the fans as he normally does getting the crowd riled up. He gets into the ring and grabs a mic.

Caulfield: "Thank you, thank you. Now I'm out here because I've got something I just gotta say, and I want to make sure it gets said to everyone it has to be said to. Sneer, Mustafa, Bruce, everyone else on the roster who just doesn't like my guts I got something I want to make clear. You can hurt my body, you can break my bones, you can beat me to a bloody pulp, but none of you will ever break my spirit. Bruce, you have destroyed my body, I've spent countless nights in the hospital getting bandaged up or worried I had a concussion since this thing between us started in September.

Now I know I got my share of swings in at you, you've got the stitches to prove that after all. I say that right now it's 1 to 1 between us and I've had enough of this. At Frozen Dreams! I want to put this feud between us to an end and let the winner actually get on to getting their World Championship Match. So here's what I propose Bruce, one final match between us, no more rematches, winner claims their contendership at the next PPV. But that ain't all, I got one more stipulation, I want this to be decisive, nobodies getting DQed this time and I want to hurt you. I want it to be a hardcore match."

The fans cheer on the notion.

"So what do you say Giant? You enough of a man to take me on in a hardcore match?"

Caulfield stands in the ring and waits for Bruce to come out and accept his challenge. Entrance music hits the speakers, but it isn't Bruce's. Sheik Mustafa makes his way out onto the entrance stage. Mustafa is alone and Caulfield looks over his shoulders expecting an attack any moment.

Caulfield: "You look a lot older than the last time I saw you Bruce. Did you shrink?"

Mustafa: "Very funny Caulfield. No, I am not Bruce nor do I represent him."
Caulfield: "Which begs the question, just why the hell are you out here?"
Mustafa: "Because Chris, I want to let you know that I can accept only being able to break your bones."


And here comes the attack Caulfield was expecting. Caulfield looks over his shoulder just as Baine gets in the ring behind him. Caulfield charges into Baine with a flurry of wild punches. Baine just tosses The Hardcore American back. Caulfield charges in again, but Baine grabs him by the throat and lifts him up, dangling him in the air by his neck for a moment. Baine plants him into the mat with a Hades Bomb. Mustafa yells to Baine from the entrance way to finish him off. Baine picks him up by the throat and then drives him down into the canvas once more with another Hades Bomb.

Mustafa: "Enygma, this is what you have to look forward to at Frozen Dreams! Take a good look because you too will fall prey to my Demon. And Chris, should you somehow win your match against Bruce The Giant you have more of this to look forward to."
(B-, B)


[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Invisible Motivation Co. We'll get the job done. We just don't feel like it right now. Get off our backs people.


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DemonAnger.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/SamoanMachine.jpg
-USPW Television Championship Match- Anger vs. Toa (c)-

Toa dominated Anger in this one. The 50-year old didn't stand much of a chance here as The Samoan Warrior's quick and powerful strikes barraged him from the start. Toa locked in an Unbreakable Sleeper and Anger tapped.

Winner: Toa in 5:46
Rating (D)


-Toa holds up his newly defended Television Championship as the music of the former champion, Andre Jones hits the mic. Jones comes out onto the stage with a mic in hand and calls out The Samoan Warrior.

Jones: "I hope you enjoy that title while you can toe, cuz I'm coming for it. I don't care how long it takes, you're gonna give me a rematch. You'll succumb to Tha Baddest, I'll beat you in that ring. I want my rematch."

Toa: "Granted. When would you like your rematch?"
Jones: "Oh, there's no use making up excuses why you... wait, did you say yes?"
Toa: "Yes."
Jones: "Seriously?"
Toa: "I'm a fighting champion Andre."
Jones: "Oh. Well then Tha Baddest is coming for you at Frozen Dreams!"
Toa: "Very well."
Jones: "Yeah, damn right very well. I can see you shaking at the idea of fighting Tha Baddest Andre Jones again. I'm gonna get that title back cuz there ain't no stoppin' Tha Baddest."

Toa: "Of course It's the Television Championship and only defended on television."
Jones: "Yeah, I know. Do I look stupid to you, of course I knew that. I'm gonna kick your ass at Frozen Dreams then I'm going to get my title back."
Toa: "May the best man win."
Jones: "I plan to."
(D)


[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Fungus Sauce. It's catching on like the plague.


-Darryl Devine makes his way out to the ring alone. He grabs a mic and begins to speak.

DD: "Now there's a few people I'd like to address right now so I'll start with the simplest one of them, Jim Force. Jim, don't stick your nose where it doesn't belong. Now sure, I don't know exactly what the hell you were trying to say last week, but I do know this, I didn't much care for your tone. I'm sure you got what you wanted though because Doom just informed me I'll be taking you on at Frozen Dreams! I don't have a problem with that though Jimbo, you've had your hand in holding me back. I'm not the same whiny, young punk I was a few months ago begging for my opportunity. Now though it's clear to me, I'm going to take what I want and I don't care who gets in my way."

Devines monologue is cut off as one-half of he USPW Tag Team Champions, Freddie Datsun, makes his way down to the ring. He gets into the ring, Devine staring a hole in him and grabs a mic.

Datsun: "Your opportunity, your opportunity, I keep hearing it out of you Darryl. I keep hearing you talk about how you've been held back, how your opportunity keeps getting stolen from you. Well Darryl, frankly I don't much believe that. You know, once upon a time I really saw something in you, I thought you could be something. Now you're just full of hostility and hatred. You don't wait around for opportunities or try to take them from others Darryl, you make them."

DD: "Well Freddie, that's exactly what I'm doing."

Devine drops his mic as The Hotshots, Cameron Vessey and Davey Wayne attack Datsun from behind. The two youngsters put the boots to The American Everyman. It isn't long before Datsun's partner, Des Davids comes barreling down to the ring. The 6'5" former football player runs head first into The Hotshots and takes both of them down with a shoulder tackle. The Hotshots fight against Davids as Devine stays out of the way. He gets out of the ring and drags Datsun out with him. In the ring Davids is able to push Wayne away from him bringing it down to him and the 5'11" Vessey. Devine tells the timekeeper to ring the bell. He does as a ref comes out to the ring and the announcer formally introduces the match.
(E+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DesDavids.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/CameronVessey_alt2.jpg
-Des Davids vs. Cameron Vessey-

The two start here already tied up and jockeying for position. The more powerful Davids is of course able to win that little test of strength and shoves Vessey all the way back across the ring. Davids continued the match dominating over Vessey, but it wasn't long before Vesseys cheap tactics and Devines interference proved a lot to handle. Vessey took control of the match and wore Davids out targeting his legs, trying to take away his mobility. Vessey did well in wearing him out, but not well enough. Davids came back and dominated Vessey all over again.

Devine tries to get involved to help his partner, but Datsun is quick to stop him. The two start to brawl on the outside catching the refs attention. The referee threatens to throw them out of there if they don't stop as he takes his eyes away from the action in the ring. Davey Wayne gets in between Datsun and Devine as he takes Devines place against Datsun. Devine slips into the ring while Wayne holds off Datsun and the ref. Davids charges at him, but Devine rolls out of the way and springs off the ropes to deliver a Devine Intervention (Springboard back elbow). Devine lays in wait now as Davids gets back to his feet before planting him with a Devine Dream Drop. Devine gets out of the ring now and pulls Wayne away from Datsun. The ref looks back into the ring as Vessey crawls over and pins Davids, 1....2....3.

Winner: Cameron Vessey in 10:13
Rating (D)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FreddieDatsun.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DavisWayneNewton_alt.jpg
-Freddie Datsun vs. Davey Wayne-

Datsun is irate over what Divinity just pulled on his partner. He chases Wayne right into the ring as the ref calls for the bell and we have another match. Datsun dominates from the start, Wayne getting in little offense throughout the match. Wayne tried fighting back as Devine tried helping him out, but Datsun wasn't about to let Divinity pull the same tricks on him. Datsun was able to lift Wayne onto his shoulders and drop him with a Patriot Press (Death Valley Driver variant). He makes the pin, 1...2...3.

Winner: Freddie Datsun in 7:27
Rating (C) (Gotta love good chemistry)


-Datsun doesn't have time to celebrate his victory as the moment he wins Devine is in the ring and going after the weakened American Everyman. Vessey and a now standing Wayne meanwhile hold off Des Davids. Divinity have their way with The People's Team beating them down.

Then the music hits and running down to the ring like a white tiger on crack is Jim Force. Devine immediately bails as Force plows into Wayne and Vessey. Behind Force comes Steve Flash who goes after Devine. Force delivers a FOOOOORCE PUNCH ~! to both Wayne and Vessey before driving them down into the mat with a pair of Full FOOOORCE!!!'s. Devine makes his way up the ramp as Flash comes after him, abandoning his teammates in the ring. Force points up the ramp at Devine and can clearly be heard telling him that he will FEEEEEL THEEEEEE FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORCE!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!
(E+)


[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Snapping Turtle Delivery Service. We beat that damn rabbit. To death.


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/NickyChampion_alt.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/BrucetheGiant.jpg
-Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant-

Bruce and Champion stand off nose to nose, or nose to chest to be a bit more accurate. Champion didn't back down from the giant though. The match was surprisingly even throughout as Champion gave Bruce a challenge. So much so in fact that it looked like Champion was about to win. Champion perched himself on the top rope about to deliver a Super Hawkeye Hammer (second rope double axe handle). Champion couldn't though as Peter Valentine pulled on the top rope sending Champion falling onto the turnbuckle. Bruce got back to his feet and throttled Champion by the throat. He picked him up and planted him with a Giant Chokeslam picking up the win.

Winner: Bruce The Giant in 7:01
Rating (C)


-We go backstage now as we see 'The Beautiful' Belle Bryden sitting at a chair in the make-up room trying to pretty herself up. She applies some blush before freaking out at what she sees behind her in the mirror. Brazzles stands behind her smiling as she just stares.

"What the-!?" Belle screams as she stands up from her chair and confronts Brazzles. "What do you think you're doing?!" Brazzles just c0cks he head to the right without saying anything, still smiling. "Well? *sighs* Whatever. You know what, I'm glad I ran into you. Now I have a few concerns about our tag team match tonight, I'm sure you do too." Brazzles just keeps staring off into space. "Or not. Anyways, I have just a few rules to lay down. 1, do not get in my way. 2, do not steal my spotlight and 3, do not try to upstage me. You will pay if you do bitch. Now, are we clear." Brazzles just keeps staring into space. "Nod if you understand."

Brazzles just c0cks her head a little more to the right. "I'm going to take that as a yes. Anything you'd like to say?" Brazzles finally says something, "Snarf, snarf."

Bryden raises an eyebrow at the response, "Right... Well, I'll just be going out to the ring now. For our match. As a team. Which must be some kind of cruel joke by somebody."

"Snarf!"
(C)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/AliciaStrong.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/RavenNightfall_alt2.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/SuzanneBrazzle1.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/WandaFish.jpg
-Alicia Strong & Raven Robinson vs. Brazzles & Belle Bryden-

An interesting match here as the team of Brazzles & Bryden provided an interesting dynamic. The match was great as all four women really brought their A-game tonight. Bryden let Brazzles do most of the heavy lifting, Belle getting in to enjoy a bit of glory against her weakened opponents. Strong begged for Bryden to face her one on one during the match, but Bryden was satisfied with letting Brazzles do the hard stuff. The team of Brazzles and Bryden dominated Strong and Robinson for a good while using quick tags and dirty double team tactics to keep their opponents down.

Bryden posed over a downed Robinson before she prepared to finish her off with a Blonde Ambition (Figure 4). Bryden set her up, but before she could lock her in Raven kicked her away and made the tag to Alicia. Strong came in the ring and immediately targeted Belle taking her down repeatedly. Strong prepared to finish this with a Strong Arm Tactic (Running Forearm), but Bryden made the tag to her partner. The two were evenly matched, but Brazzles and Bryden were able to employ underhanded tactics to gain control of the match again.

In the end though Brazzles was able to reverse a Night Faller (reverse DDT) spinning herself around and rolling Robinson into a small package. Brazzles grabbed the rope for leverage and pick up the win.

Winners: Brazzles & Bryden in 12:02
Rating (C+)


-Brazzles and Bryden celebrate their win. Brazzles leaves the ring now and goes up to the timekeeper who's holding onto the USPW Womens Championship. Brazzles tugs the belt out of his hands and hugs it. She gets back into the ring, continuing to hug the belt tightly, coddling it like a mother would. She holds it up now raising it high like a scene right out of 'The Lion King.' The only difference, aside from her not having a real, live lion cub, is Rafiki was never kicked in the back of the neck.

Bryden delivers a Dish of The Day (Roundhouse to the back of the head) to Brazzles, her own partner, knocking her out. Bryden grabs the Womens Championship now and holds it up yelling at her partner that 'it should be mine!'
(D+)


[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Apathy. It makes the world go "Eh."


-We're back from commercial break as our cameras find T-Rex backstage with his manager, Sheik Mustafa. T-Rex doesn't seem too happy and Mustafa doesn't seem too concerned about that.

Rex: "But I wanted to be the one who beat Justice last week."
Mustafa: "And you'll have your chance at Frozen Dreams! Right now we focus on Baine and Enygma. Understand?"
Rex: "Yeah, but I should be the one beating Justice. He beat me and-"
Mustafa: "Exactly. He beat you. End of story."
Rex: "And if you don't let me beat him-"
Mustafa: "I don't care Rex. We support Baine. End of story."

Rex: "Well how come you didn't have me wrestle Caulfield. You don't trust that I can win?"
Mustafa: "Precisely. Now shut up. Baine has a match and I will be there to support him."

Rex doesn't look happy as Mustafa leaves to go support Baine. Rex pulls a business card out of his pocket and looks down at it intently.
(D)


-Our cameras go backstage now to a dark corridor where USPW World Champion Enygma is standing. By his side is a woman in a mask identical to his. The woman speaks.

"What is evil, has a heart of hatred and two red eyes of pure rage? The answer is Baine. My name is Ryddle and I am here to speak for Enygma. Enygma believes that what Baine has been doing in the entire time he's been here is wrong. Enygma knows that true power can't come through fear. 'Fear is the enemy of logic.' Enygma and I know better than to be afraid of an overgrown bully who beats up those weaker than him. 'Fear can't hurt you any more than a dream.' Enygma will triumph over you as was always meant to be. Enygma will slay you once and for all Demon, for he is courageous enough to.

'Cowards die many times before their deaths
The valiant never taste of death but once.'

You will not succeed Baine."
(B-) (For anyone wondering who Ryddle is, she'd be Dharma Gregg)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/ChrisCaulfield_alt1.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/USPW/USPWVS.pnghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/TysonBaine.jpg
-Chris Caulfield vs. Baine w/ Mustafa-

The Demon From The Deep, Baine showed no restraint in going after Caulfield. Still hurting from the earlier assault at Baines hand Caulfield fought back as best he could but found himself overpowered by the Demon. Caulfield showed plenty of heart as he fought back against Baine, but it wasn't enough to trounce Baines rage. Baine was able to put The Hardcore American out of his misery with a Hades Bomb (Double Handed Choke Bomb) to pick up the win.

Winner: Baine in 9:41
Rating (B-)


-The Demon From The Deep is, of course not willing to stop at just beating Caulfield in a match. Baine continues his assault on Caulfield before the lights go out in the arena just as they did last week. The question mark appears on the tron signaling the arrival of Enygma. Unlike last week though fire erupts out of the corner posts illuminating the arena and the ring in a red glow. Enygma finds himself standing right in front of Baine.

Baine wastes no time, he roars before charging at Enygma with a lariat. Enygma ducks under it, but is caught by his foot as Mustafa grabs it. Baine charges in now with Enygma locked in place. Enygma stomps on Mustafas hand getting him to release him as he rolls out of Baines way just in time. Enygma looks to charge in himself now, but he's caught with a clubbing blow to the back by T-Rex who joins his partner in the ring now. Rex pulls Enygma to his feet now and prepares to set him up for the Jurassic Crush, but Baine wants to destroy him too.

Baine tries to pull Enygma over to him so he can finish him, but Rex wants to prove that he can do it. The two basically play tug of war with the World Champion. Mustafa doesn't step in as he's still leaning against the apron nursing that stomped hand. The Titans continue arguing and look like they may pull Enygma apart by the seams, until Rex is nailed with a chair wielded by Chris Caulfield. Rex goes down and Caulfield takes a swing at Baine. The chair dents over his head, but he's still standing and he looks angry (-er). Baine roars as Caulfield nails him again. Baine continues to stand. Caulfield draws his chair back and prepares to see if the third time is the charm.

He swings, but doesn't make contact. The chair is ripped out of his hands from behind as Bruce The Giant grabs it. Bruce spins Caulfield around and plants him with a Giant Chokeslam. Baine now turns his attention back to Enygma and drives him into the canvas with a Hades Bomb. The World Champion just lay there on the mat as The Demon From The Deep, Baine just stands over him.
(B-)


Final Rating (C)
Cable Rating (1.02)


Post Show Recap Brought To You By: Commercials. They help pay for stuffs.

-Toa defeated Anger (D)
-Cameron Vessey defeated Des Davids (D)
-Freddie Datsun defeated Davey Wayne (C)
-Bruce The Giant defeated Nicky Champion (C)
-Belle Bryden and Brazzles defeated Raven Robinson and Alicia Strong (C+)
-Baine defeated Chris Caulfield (B-)
<hr>http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FrozenDreams.jpg
<object width="320" height="265"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/dDENcJKKP_Q&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/dDENcJKKP_Q&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="30" height="25"></embed></object>

Current Card for USPW Frozen Dreams:

USPW World Championship Match- Tyson Baine vs. Enygma (c)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
Hardcore Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
The Force vs. Darryl Devine
Toa vs. Andre Jones

[MaxxHexx]

USPW World Championship Match- Tyson Baine vs. Enygma (c) I expect Sneer involvment.
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c) They will cheat but it will fall through and hurt them.
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c) Belle interferes.
Hardcore Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant The stipulations give the advantage here.
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden Like a boss.
The Force vs. Darryl Devine Via interference
Toa vs. Andre Jones Toa is cooler than if the bee's knees wore the cat's pajamas.

[Nightshadeex]

How happy are you going to be when Sam leaves the business? It shouldn't be too far away.

[tristram]

Yeah, I'm saddened that USPW isn't a complete joke here. I had plenty more jokes at the expense of the company I'm booking and what a vomit-inducing good time they are to watch to get out.
I hate to say this but I didn't actually make the connection of T-Rex and Negativity-Rex until just now. This gives me an idea...

<hr>

WHAT DID THE ARSEHOLES SAY?


6,120 minutes and one quite successful television show later here I am. In a bathroom stall. Writing the second show. On a roll of toilet paper. With a dry-erase marker. A pink one. It's sparkly. Not quite the way I envisioned things when Mr. Washburn said I was getting transferred. Doesn't matter, I'll have the last laugh when one of the major networks picks up my new pilot for 'The Adventures of Negativity-Rex & Douche-Lad.' When I haven't been forced to write a wrestling show I've been putting together a revamped script for it. No network will be able to say no to this gem.

As I worked feverishly at the new script the bathroom door opened wider and I heard the stall door next to mine open. I heard a familiar high-pitched voice come from the stall, "Hey, Mr. Strong wants to see you in his office right now."

"Yeah, yeah, I'll get there."
"He said now!" Tiny exclaimed.
"Okay, I'll get going. By the way, why didn't you just call me on one of these little Fisher-Price walkie talkies Sam insisted we have?"
"Cuz I gotta take a dump. Why the hell do you think I came all the way out here?"

And with that I moved surprisingly quickly to Mr. Strongs office. I opened the door and walked inside. Sitting at his desk was Mr. Strong, but by his side were Peter Valentine, Nicky Champion, Giant Redwood, Danny Jillefski and Alicia Strong.

"I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"
"No, brother, we were waiting for you before we started."
"So, what's this about? Why are we all here?"
"Why don't you shut your f***ing mouth and listen dipsh*t?" Easier said than done tubby.

"...So anyways, why are we here?"
"What the f*** did I just tell you needledick?"
"We're here Jay because I have a few expectations of you as my new head booker." Can't be much if you're accepting shows I wrote on toilet paper. Not even two-ply either.
"I wouldn't bother Mr. Strong, I won't be here long enough to fail whatever inane goals you have in mind for me."
"Oh really. And why is that brother?"
"Because it's only a short matter of time before my pilot gets picked up and I no longer have to work for you."
"I doubt that brother so listen up."
"And listen good you little prick."
"Jay, I'm giving you a list of goals that I want you to accomplish."
"And what if I don't?"
"Then I'll be very angry at you."
"You can't fire me, can you?"
"Washburn would pull American Wrestling from his programming."

"So basically you have no power over me."
"Yet, brother."
"Yet?"
"We were bumped back an hour by Sports America a few weeks ago by the Competitive Tooth Cleaning Triathlon." Ah yes, brushing, flossing and gurgling in a competitive environment. Sports Americas last failed experiment. Turned out a flossing fetish gave it a decent rating though. "USPW doesn't plan on doing business with Sports America for much longer. When USPW parts ways with Sports America what do you think happens to you?"
"I go back to working for Mr. Washburn of course."
"Wrong brother. You're an employee of mine now, Washburn wants you here so that you won't be there. We're stuck with each other brother, so get used to it."
"Well if I'm stuck here can I at least get a real office? My current one smells. Really bad."
"I'll think about it brother. Now to business."

"I could do business better in a real office."
"Your office was designed to do your business in. Now shut up and let Sam talk. Some of us have better things to do than hear you complain kid." Valentine chimes in.
"First goal for you is simple, I have plenty of my own money invested into USPW and plenty of investor money too."
"But it's only worth $10 million, a big star like you doesn't have more money than that?"
"Here's a lesson for you brother, don't let Rip Chord open a bar tab in your name. Now back to business I don't want USPW falling into debt at any time for any reason."
"I dunno, $10 mil ain't hard to waste nowadays."

"Second on my list involves Nicky and Peter. Both of them are important to the future of this company." The 46 year old without any measurable skill and on the verge of retirement is important to the future? Seriously? "That's why I don't want either of their momentums to fall below a certain level. Nickys better not fall below a B- and Peters better not fall below C+. Got it?"
"Umm... that's nice that you have letters for them and all, but, uh, how the hell am I supposed to know how I'm doing on that when you're just making the grades up?"
"Oh brother, don't you know anything?"
"I know my name."
"The grades come from the Adam Ryland Statistical Evaluation Honorable Online Library Explorer System."
"The Adam Ryland Statisti-whatchamajiget?"
"The Adam Ryland Statistical Evaluation Honorable Online Library Explorer System."
"That's a mouthful."
"Then just use the abbreviation brother."
"Which is?"
"ARSEHOLES, The ARSEHOLES."
"Oh, so we go by what The ARSEHOLES say? The ARSEHOLES provide the grades?"
"Yes. Now can we move on?"

"Yeah, sure, do what The ARSEHOLES tell me, got it."
"Next order of business, I don't want you to hire any psychopaths."
"Well, I guess I'll just cross Arkham Asylum off my places to scout."
"Moving on brother, my wrestlers are an investment which is why I don't want any of them getting hurt."
"Not because they're your friends or because they're fellow human beings?"
"I'm a businessman now Jay." Score one for market research. "Everyone's an investment."
"Even me?"
"No. Now to get to my point I don't want you hiring anyone with less than a C- in safety."
"Going by The ARSEHOLES, right?"
"Right brother."
"So don't hire anyone The ARSEHOLES think is unsafe. Got it, anything else?"

"Yes, I want workers who are in shape, ones that don't gas out after 5 minutes. The ones that can't go more than a few minutes are useless."
"Hey tubby, I think he's talking about you." I whisper to Redwood.
"Shut your f***ing mouth you worthless little dipsh*t! Don't ever call me fat!"
"Okay, sorry I offended you blubber nuggets."
"That's it! It's time I kicked you puny little ass f***wad!"

Redwood leaps off the couch as fast as his fat, little legs could carry him up to his feet. Jillefski immediately stands in front of him and tries to calm him down. After a few words Redwood plops back down onto the couch.

"Now as I was saying before you picked a fight brother, I don't want you hiring anyone with less than C- stamina."
"Okay, don't hire anyone The ARSEHOLES think is a fat, useless waste of space. Got it. Anything else?"
"No brother, that'll be all. Now get back to work. I better see the script for the next show on my desk before the end of the day."

With that I leave Mr. Strongs office and head back to my own. Luckily no one was using my stall when I got back. I got back to finishing up the next show, but couldn't help but hear and smell what I heard and smelt. "Tiny, are you still in there?" I asked. "Sh*t yeah, I got the runs bad." He replied.


Definitely not how I envisioned my first office...
<hr>
Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling:

-USPW TV Championship Match- ??? vs. Andre Jones (c)
-Women's #1 Contender Match- Miss York vs. J-Ro vs. Brazzle vs. Tatiana (Agent 69)
-Non-Title Match- The Peoples Team (Datsun & Davids) vs. ???
-Chris Caulfield vs. Jumbo Jackson
-James Justice vs. Tyson Baine

3 pts for correct winner
1 pt for correct match rating
and what the hell, 10 pts if anyone can get either of the ??? correct. (Here's your hint, they're new signings).

Next show will be up on Saturday.

Well, I'd like to see someone get the ??? so here's clue #2. The singles ??? was never in USPW: 65, both wrestlers in the tag team ??? however were featured in USPW: 65

God, I laughed like a hee-haw donkey when I read this. Reading for word for word everyone of your posts, loving it.

This part got me too:

Wayne: "Cam, what the hell are you doing?"
Vessey: "Looking for his wallet, I need some money ASAP. Those sharks don't have much in the way of patience, but plenty in the way of braindead muscle."

....

Vessey: (Speaking into Devine's mic now) "Yes, we would like to kick your asses and we will, but I just have a quick question. Are either of you by any chance carrying your wallets on you at the moment?"

It's funny as hell, 'cos you just never see it coming.

One thought, Brazzles is as crazy as bat poop. Heh, I like it.

[GruntMark]

USPW World Championship Match- Tyson Baine vs. Enygma (c)
B-

USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
C

USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
D+

Hardcore Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
C-

Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
C

The Force vs. Darryl Devine
D

Toa vs. Andre Jones
D

[J Silver]

*Ahem*
Current Card for USPW Frozen Dreams:
How happy are you going to be when Sam leaves the business? It shouldn't be too far away.It may surprise you to learn, but not very much. If he does then Dean Daniels takes over. That guy just screams 'boring' to me. Besides, jobbing out Strong is still a cheap yet effective tactic.
God, I laughed like a hee-haw donkey when I read this. Reading for word for word everyone of your posts, loving it.

This part got me too:

Wayne: "Cam, what the hell are you doing?"
Vessey: "Looking for his wallet, I need some money ASAP. Those sharks don't have much in the way of patience, but plenty in the way of braindead muscle."

....

Vessey: (Speaking into Devine's mic now) "Yes, we would like to kick your asses and we will, but I just have a quick question. Are either of you by any chance carrying your wallets on you at the moment?"

It's funny as hell, 'cos you just never see it coming.

One thought, Brazzles is as crazy as bat poop. Heh, I like it.Glad to know I can still make you laugh. And as for Brazzles, it just wouldn't be a J Silver Dynasty without mental instability now would it?
<hr>
Prediction Contest Results:

xopher316- 20 pt
Bigpapa42- 18 pt
Astil- 18 pt
GruntMark- 16 pt
Dragonmack- 15 pt
1PWfan- 15 pt
MaxxHexx- 15 pt
BYU 14- 15 pt
Nightshadeex- 14 pt
Jammy Dodger- 9 pt

Congratulation to xopher316, you had me figured out.

MTD Standings:

BYU 14- 46 pt
xopher316- 45 pt
Dragonmack- 43 pt
Bigpapa42- 30 pt
Jammy Dodger- 27 pt
MaxxHexx- 27 pt
SeanMcFly- 24 pt
Angeldelayette- 24 pt
Nightshadeex- 23 pt
Astil- 18 pt
GruntMark- 16 pt
mistaken- 15 pt
1PWfan- 15 pt
ChrisKid- 6 pt
Still looking for feedback or suggestions for the monthly prize as well. I've still only got some sort of guest writer spot, Jim Force Merchandise, or an e-pat on the back and no clue if anybody would even want any of it.<hr>

Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling (FD! Go Home Show)

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots
-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones
-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine
-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden
-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant

3 pts for correct winner
1 pt for correct match rating.

Show should be up by Monday. Backstage post coming tomorrow, it involves Sam Strong and these new-fangled things called computers.

[Dragonmack]

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots
E+ bad chemistry and all.

-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones
D because a title is on the line.

-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine
C+ only because Flash could carry a blow up doll to a C- match.

-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden
D not sure if your product embraces mix gender matches

-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant
C+ no Samoans means Bruce Smash

[Nightshadeex]

Dean Daniels is a horrible person to take over USPW, that's what I've noticed as well. Worse than that, he always wants to book USPW himself. BORING!

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots
Well, it'll hopefully give the Shots some momentum...
(E+)

-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones
Andre as well.
(D)

-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine
You gotta make Pete look good for your goal...
(D+)

-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden
I see Darryl geting pushed to the moon again.
(C)

-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant
The heels ride momentum into the PPV.
(B)

[GruntMark]

Oh snap. I thought USPWs first PPV was after three shows.

Or maybe it usually is in game, I dont care enough to check. :p

I'll make new predictions....soon.

[Bigpapa42]

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots
-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones
-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine
-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden
-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant

[James Casey]

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots Oh, come on... The Hillbillies?!? E+ tops
-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones Tempting as it would be to take Jones down a notch, he needs this win. D
-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine Owner goals = Valentine win. D+
-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden Classic tactic for a go-home show. C
-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant Rex takes the fall. C

[tristram]

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots - D+
-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones - C-
-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine C+
-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden - C
-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant C+

[GruntMark]

Hillbillies have actually landed me some matches in the D+ area. Tag seems greatly improved in TEW 2010.

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots
D But they still arent worth pushing

-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones
D USA has to be near retirement.

-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine
D+ Strongs BFF is too much for boringly consistent

-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden
C Tough pick, small upset for DD

-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant
C+ Faces just have more talent, worth keeping stronger

[BYU 14]

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots
Hillbillies just suck :) (D+)

-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones
Jones younger and more valuable (C-)

-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine
Valentine is more important (C-)

-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden
How can so many dount the Force? (D)

-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant
This could go either way, but Bruce makes the difference (C+)

[xopher316]

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots (D)
-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones (D)
-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine (D+)
-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden (C)
-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant (C+)

[J Silver]

Dean Daniels is a horrible person to take over USPW, that's what I've noticed as well. Worse than that, he always wants to book USPW himself. BORING!Exactly, which is why I'm trying to set it up now so that PJ takes over when Sam retires.
Oh snap. I thought USPWs first PPV was after three shows.

Or maybe it usually is in game, I dont care enough to check. :p

I'll make new predictions....soon.Probably does, I think after two shows actually. I changed the PPV's around anyways.<hr>

Technophobia


Welcome to Sh*ttsylvania. Population: Me and whatever's growing in the stall next to me. I think I heard it gurgle 'Kill me' earlier. I could be wrong, might've been 'Feed me.' Chief export of Sh*ttsylvania: Misery; producer: Jacob Stranton. I've been here almost a month and I still have to use the stinkin' bathroom as an office. They won't even give me one measly sheet of paper or a pen and my pink, sparkly dry-erase marker is starting to run low. My company issued cell phone rings as I'm soaking in my self-misery. They have enough to buy cell phones, but not paper? Really? I answer the phone to who else but Mr. Strong. He wants me in his office asap brother, he's got some new-fangled gadget he wants to give me. Maybe it's a clicky pen. That level of technology would be like magic to Sam. Now you see it *Click* Now you don't *Click* Now you do *Click* Now you don't *Click* Now you do *Click* Now you don't *Click* Now you do *Click* Now you don't *Click* Now you do *Click* Now you don't. Entertains 5 and 65 year olds alike.

I left my office and headed for Sams. As I arrived at the closed door I let out a deep sigh knowing Sam and technology can't be a good mix. I opened the door and no sooner was I proven right. I walked right into PJ trying to teach his dad how to work a computer.

"No, dad stop touching the screen. You use the mouse to control the cursor."
"So I can't touch the screen for that?"
"No, you can only do that with a touch screen monitor."
"Then get me one of those."
"No dad, I'm not getting you a touch screen monitor, now let's try the mouse again."
"Well I want one of those touch ones."
"Touch screen monitors suck. Now, please dad, use the damn mouse."


"I'm not interrupting, am I?"
"Oh Jay, thank god you're here. You know how to use a computer, right?"
"Yeah, of course."
"Alright, good. One less person I have to worry about."
"Worry about what?"
"This office is getting computers and I'm trying to teach everyone how to use them."
"Oh, cool. How's that working out for you?"

PJ just points at his dad.

"What's with this red laser? Do I just point it at the screen? That clicker thing on the screen isn't moving. Is that right?"
"Dad, put the mouse on the mousepad and then move it around."
"I like my typewriter better."
"Get with the times old man."
"Hey, there's a hand on the screen. It's pointing up, what am I supposed to do now."
"Hold on dad." (Now turning to me) "So, anyways I got you a laptop Jay."

PJ pulls one out from behind Sams desk and hands it to me.

"It's all set up for you. All the codes and info you'll need are in the 'Instructions' document on the desktop. I've also set up a company e-mail account for you and added in all of the contacts for everyone else here. We'll be expecting the next show written up on your computer."
"Alright, so do I just send the next show to Sam when I'm done?"
"Hey, this thing keeps typing r over and over again! I think it's broken."
"It's not broken dad, get your elbow off the keyboard."
"The what-board?"

"You know what, just e-mail the next show to me when you're done, okay? I think dad is going to need a bit more time to get the hang of it."
"Male enhancement? Viagra pills? Camera shows? Son, I think you got me a perverted computer."
"Those are pop-ups dad, just ignore them."
"How? They keep popping up."
"Close the pop-up windows then."
"How the hell do I do that?"
"Click the close button."
"When I do that it asks me to open it."
"Dad, you're clicking the wrong button."
"Well how the hell am I supposed to know that. Damn new-fangled machines."

"I think we're done here Jay. You can go back to your office. E-mail me if you have any concerns or questions. Anything like that."
"Son, how do I tell this lady on the screen that she should stop stripping and go back to school?"
"Dad, close that window."
"She's taking her clothes off now. Hmm, she's got a nice body."
"Dad, please close that damn window, there are some things fathers and sons just shouldn't do together."


"Yeah, I'll just head out now." I say as though to myself. PJ is too busy trying to close the web-cam site his dad is on to say goodbye. Not that I blame him, the idea of Sam Strong looking at internet porn isn't a pleasant one. I left the office and who else would I bump into than someone I really don't want to? "Yo, stinky!" Biff runs up to me. "Hey, you got a laptop too. Sweet deal, huh?"

"Yeah, totally."
"Hey, you think PJ put any site blockers on here?"

"No dad, she would not make a good valet, she's a stripper!" I hear from behind the Strong office door.

"I doubt that Biff."
"Sweet. I'll be in my office. Do not disturb if you know what I mean. Oh, yeah!"
"Wait, you have an office?"
"Yeah, of course. Who doesn't bro? Anyway, smell ya later Stinky."

Biff has an office and I don't? Dammit!


"No dad, you are not giving your e-mail or any other contact info to that stripper!"

<hr>For anyone who'd like to add PJ to their own game, here are the renders for him.

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/PJ-Strong_alt1.jpg http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/PJ-Strong.jpg<hr>Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling (FD! Go Home Show)

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots
-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones
-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine
-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden
-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant

3 pts for correct winner
1 pt for correct match rating.

Show will probably be up by Monday.

[Nightshadeex]

Hi-freakin-larious. PJ Strong is awesome.

[1PWfan]

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots
Whilst tag experience makes a big difference in 2k10, The Hillbillies still suck too hard to win at anything

-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones
It's clear that you're not 100% behind Andre, but he's a good solid worker, and unlike USA he's not retiring any time soon

-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine
This is an easy one- One loss isn't going to kill Peter's momentum, and this is Steve Flash we're talking about.

-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden
Because I want to

-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant
In this situation the monsters could do with a win, to add some drama going into the PPV

[MaxxHexx]

-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots Hillbillies are on the out and out.
-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones He is the baddest.
-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine Cause he is a p-i-m-p.
-Jim FORCE! & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden Interference by Brazzles.
-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant Via DQ.

[J Silver]

OOC: Sorry about the lateness. I'm sure everyone's surprised that someone with a track record as impeccable as mine could ever be this late. Suffice it to say daylight savings time has been screwing with me.<hr>
USPW: Where we've had 4 shows and only a total of 5 days late.

Consistency~! On with the show
<hr>
http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/68AW.png
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USPW American Wrestling
Wednesday, Week 4, January 2010 (FD! Go Home Show)
Held at The Shakeshaft Auditorium
Att. 3,793

Dark Matches


-(Secret Dark Match Mk. III) (D+)

-(The future is filled with such hope Super Secret Dark Match) (C+)


Main Show


-We kick off the last show before Frozen Dreams as we follow 'The Beautiful' Belle Bryden as she walks down the hall backstage. Unfortunately for her the camera's not the only one following her. Brazzles follows Bryden as she walks around. Bryden seems to be getting more and more frustrated with the batty Brazzles upon every step she takes. Finally Belle seems to have had enough as she stops in her tracks and does a 180 on her heel coming face to face with Brazzles. Brazzles just stops and looks at Bryden, a smile on her face and her head c0cked slightly to the right.

Bryden: "Why the hell are you following me?"

Bryden waits for an answer from Brazzles, but gets nothing.

Bryden: "Stop following me. You understand that? Stop following me. Go do something productive. Or destructive. Whatever you wierdos do. I know, how about you go beat up Raven?"
Brazzles: "Aye aye cap'n. For Energon!"

Brazzles charges off in the opposite direction while Bryden just has a look of bewilderment plastered across her face. She just shakes her head in disbelief before moving on. Finally she arrives at her destination.

Vessey: "Paid vacation?"
Devine: "No."
Vessey: "Benefits?"
Devine: "No."
Vessey: "Health?"
Devine: "Keep screwing around and I'll be a danger to yours."
Vessey: "So, why did we join you again?"
Wayne: "I think it was the threats of physical violence."
Vessey: "Oh yeah, there were a lot of those."
Wayne: "Were?"
Vessey: "Yeah, forget the past tense."

Bryden approaches Devine walking right past the Hotshots who can't help but stare.

Devine: "And just what do you want Belle?"
Bryden: "Glad you asked Devine. I want to lay down a few ground rules since I'm stuck teaming with you tonight."
Vessey: "Hi."
Bryden: "...Hi. Anyways I want to make a few things clear to you Darryl."
Wayne: "Hi."
Bryden: "Yeah, hi to you too. First, don't get in my way."
Devine: "Then just stay out of my way."
Bryden: "Second, Don't steal my spotlight. I'm the real star of this show, don't forget that."

Devine: "Funny, I don't see a poster with your name on it around here."
Bryden: "And third, don't piss me off."
Devine: "How about you just get your little stuck-up ass out of here and go get ready for the match? How's that sound?"
Bryden: "And because I don't think you heard me last time, third, don't piss me off."
Devine: "Look, I don't know where this sense of entitlement of yours comes from and I really don't care. Just do your part in the match and don't lose. Do that and we'll get along just fine, okay Belle?"

Belle doesn't look pleased with Devines attitude towards her. She just stares at Devine for a moment looking like she's about to have a hissy fit over it. Leave it to Vessey though to interrupt an otherwise tense moment.

Vessey: "You're beautiful."
Bryden: "Thank you. Now stop staring at my ass you little creep."
Vessey: "Do I have to?"
Wayne: "Yeah, do we have to?"
Devine: "Yes morons, you have to. The sooner you do, the sooner she goes away."

Vessey: (To Belle) "Can we go with you instead?"

Bryden stomps off like a child that wasn't allowed candy would to their room.

Vessey: "Is that a yes? No?"
Wayne: "Women, they never give you a straight answer."
Vessey: "It's like my Uncle Bryan always used to say, 'Communication with bitches can always be made simple; one slap for yes, two slaps for no.'"
Devine: "One of these days I'd like to meet your Uncle Bryan."
Vessey: "I can call him up for you."
Devine: "No, you can't punch someone through a phone."
Vessey: "No kidding. Phone punching could wipe out that pesky telemarketer problem so easily."
(E-)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/CaptainUSA.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/AndreJones_alt.jpg
-Captain USA vs. Andre Jones-

Can you say squash? Jones dominates the Cap'n in this match and puts him away with a Blast From The Past in our worst match ever. This year.

Winner: Andre Jones in 5:09
Rating (E)

[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: FutureCo's Bending Suit. Bite our shiny, metal asses.

-We go backstage now to our interview area where Seduction is with The Hotshots.


Seduction: "Cameron, Davey, the two of you have a chance to win the USPW Tag Team Championships this Saturday at Frozen Dreams! How do you feel about your chances?"
Wayne: "Well Seduction, we're very confident that we can win the championships and go down in history as the youngest Tag Team Champions in the history of this company."
Vessey: "We will be the youngest, right?"
Wayne: "The average age for a champion around here is 43, so it's pretty safe to say."
Vessey: "That's true. I'm never in short supply of walkers and canes to pawn off around here."
Wayne: "Yeah, and if we tell anyone to break a leg out there we're not doing it out of good will, we're doing it maliciously."
Vessey: "Yeah, old people sure are fragile."
Wayne: "Which is why it's going to be so easy for us to become Tag Team Champions this Saturday. Old Man Datsun doesn't stand a chance against The Hotshots."
Vessey: "Amen to that. Seriously now, you think he keeps his wallet on him."

"Now who would go and do a fool thing like that. Of course I don't keep my wallet on me during a match." says Freddie Datsun as he walks unto this scene.
Vessey: "Dammit. Does the taller, stupider looking one keep his on him?"
Wayne: "Cam, shut up about the damn wallets already. Don't you see the old man in front of us? By himself."
Vessey: "Yeah, considering our violent tendencies he just made a stupid."
Datsun: "Now boys, I ain't come down here for violence, we can save that for Saturday. I came down here to ask you a simple question."
Vessey: "Yes, we will be the youngest Tag Team Champions when we beat your old ass for the belts."
Datsun: "That wasn't my question."
Vessey: "Oh. No, I am not secretly Batman."
Datsun: "That wasn't it either."
Vessey: "I am not secretly Iron-Man. Though that would be pretty awesome. I would make a few modifications to that suit though. Then those terrorists would quake in fear of my almighty laser dong-piece."

Datsun: (To Wayne) "Can you get him to shut up?"
Wayne: "I wish."
Vessey: "Oh, and I'd be a freakin' billionaire with a charming alcoholic streak. How could you top that?"
Datsun: "Stop guessing."
Vessey: "But I like this game."

Datsun: "I just got a simple question to ask you two. Now I know both of you are promising young talent and that one day you could amount to something in this business."
Vessey: "Well now, flattery will get you everywhere."
Datsun: "So why in the hell would you join Devine and waste your talents on him?"
Vessey: "Hmmm...."
Wayne: "Well,.... There were the threats of violence."
Vessey: "And the promises."
Wayne: "Ah yes, the promises of no more threats of violence."
Vessey: "And the other promises."
Wayne: "Yeah, the promises of a lot more threats of violence."
Vessey: "And the training."
Wayne: "Yup, the training at the constant threat of violence."


"How about the promises of violence towards enemies?" Devine asks as he comes out of nowhere clubbing Datsun on the back of the head. Devine begins beating Datsun down, The Hotshots momentarily joining in. Devine targets Datsuns knee and The Hotshots follow suit. Devine is able to do a number on the joint including getting in a shot with a steel pipe before the cavalry of Des Davids and Steve Flash arrive and chase off Divinity. Davids looks absolutely livid at the cowardly attack as he tends to his partner.
(E+)


-USPW Womens Champion Raven Robinson is backstage grabbing herself a coffee, the cameraman covering her because he's a pervert. At least I believe so. Anyways, it was a good thing the pervert was there watching Raven get a coffee. From out of seemingly nowhere someone yelling "One shall stand, one shall fall Megatron!" can be heard. Raven looks around before Brazzles charges into her slamming her head onto the table.

Raven falls to the ground and Brazzles mounts her and punches away landing lefts and rights into the champs exposed face. Brazzles then lets up for a moment, Raven screaming to her, "What the hell are you doing?" Brazzles responding with "That's a question you should ask YOURSELF, Megatron." And then Brazzles lunges down and bites at Ravens ear looking like she's trying to bite it off. Security finally show up on the scene and pull the psychotic Brazzles off the champ. Robinson clutches at her ear as Brazzles looks on just smiling down at her, blood on her lips.
(E+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/AlTheHillbilly.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/PeteTheHillbilly.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DavisWayneNewton_alt.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/CameronVessey_alt2.jpg
-The Hillbillies vs. The Hotshots-

In a wonderful, fast paced match The Hotshots went back and forth with The Hillbillies exchanging holds and doing all sorts of flippity floppity moves. Just kidding. The Hotshots destroyed The Hillbillies and easily picked up the win going into their match at Frozen Dreams!

Winners: The Hotshots in 4:43
Rating (E+)


-The Hotshots are victorious over The Hillbillies, as though that's a surprise. Vessey doesn't seem to want to just enjoy the victory though as he starts stomping away at one of them, you know, the one with the beard. Wayne joins in on the attack stomping away at the other Hillbilly, you know, the one with the beard. Vessey stops stomping The Hillbilly and drops down to his knees to look in his pockets. Vessey finds a wallet and pulls out money from it, The Hotshots apparently mugging The Hillbillies, as though that's a surprise. Vessey then looks to the other Hillbillies pocket, but before he can Des Davids and Steve Flash come running down to the ring.

Wayne and Vessey bail out of there before the two can get to them. Davids is pissed with The Hotshots over their attack on his partner earlier tonight. He yells for them to get back in the ring and settle this like men, but The Hotshots aren't having any of it. Wayne taunts Davids to come and get them while Vessey just counts his new-found money, all $3 of it. Them Hillbillies sure is high rollers.
(E+)

[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Suicide Booths: 25 years and not a single customer complaint.


-Backstage T-Rex and Sheik Mustafa are in the Titans locker room. Rex doesn't look too happy with the way Mustafa has been treating him like an after thought lately. Mustafa meanwhile doesn't seem to care or want to deal with Rex.

Rex: "I'm just as important as Baine."
Mustafa: "No, you are not. Now start getting ready for the match. Baine must not lose."
Rex: "Why don't you ever support me?"
Mustafa: "oh, stop being such a whiny cry baby and get over it."
Rex: "What will it take for you to treat me like him?"
Mustafa: "How about winning a match? Maybe like this one you are going to be in. Or you know what, why don't you take out Sneer or Justice? How about you do that?"
Rex: "I'll do it."
Mustafa: "Do what? I just want you to get ready for this match?"
Rex: "I'm going to get my win back from Justice!"

Rex runs off leaving Mustafa in anger yelling for him to get back and help support Baine.
(D-)


-We go to our interview area now where Seduction is standing by with Jim Force and Alicia Strong.

Seduction: "Jim, how do-"
Force: "THAT IS MR. JIM FOOOOOOOORCE!!!!!!"
Seduction: "Mr. Force-"
Force: "THAT IS MR. JIM FOOOOOOOORCE!!!!!!"
Seduction: "Umm, Mr. Jim Force, how do you feel going into your match with Darryl Devine tonight?"
Force: "THE DASTARDLY DO-BADDING DENIZEN OF DELINQUENCY DEEMED DEVINE DOES DEFY TRADITIOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!! DEVINE, YOU SHALL NOT GET AWAY WITH INSULTING ESTEEMED ELDERS WITH ENTANGLED ENTICEMENTS OF EVIL DO-BADDERYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!! THE FOOOOOOOOOOORCE SHALL NOT STAND FOR YOUR DEFIANCE OF TRADITIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!! BUY MY MERCHANDISE. THE FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORCE IS A FOOOOOOOOOOOOOORCE THAT YOU SHALL FINALLY FULLY FEEL THE FEARSOME FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORCE OF THE FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORCE!!!!! ! RAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH!!!!"

Force stomps off leaving Seduction and Strong standing there unsure of what exactly just transpired.


Strong: "..... So, yeah. I think that about sums it up."
(C-) (Warning: Some words Jim Force uses may not exist. Also, Jim Force may not understand some of the words he uses. .....Okay, most of the words he uses.)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/JimForce.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/AliciaStrong.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Darryl-Devine-Heel.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/WandaFish.jpg
-Jim Force & Alicia Strong vs. Darryl Devine & Belle Bryden-

In the spirit of wanting to have at least one good match on this card Forces involvement was kept minimal aside from him shouting stuff from the apron to his partner. The ladies wrestled the majority of this intergender match. Though that's not to say Devine didn't take some cheap shots at Strong during the course of the match. It was a pretty back and forth affair between the two women, neither taking a distinct advantage over the other. Bryden however used a few cheap tactics and help from her partner to gain that advantage. Bryden wore her opponent out until finally Alicia was able to get the tag.

Force exploded into the ring like a psychotic force of nature to be reckoned with. He took down both Devine and Bryden repeatedly and delivered FOOOOORCE ~! Punches to both. Force sets Devine up for a Full Force, but Bryden stops him in his tracks with a low blow. Strong gets back in the ring and takes care of Belle, brawling with her now. Devine picks Force up and sets him up for the Devine Dream Drop. He goes for it and... Force pushes him away. Devine springs off the ropes and right into a kick to the gut from Force. Force picks him up and drills him into the canvas with a Full Force. He makes the pin, 1.....2.....3.

Winners: Force & Strong in 9:32
Rating (C-)

[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Santa Clause. He's still real to me dammit!


-We go now to the inside of James Justices locker room. Why is there a cameraman there you may wonder? Because he's a pervert. What? It's still a perfectly reasonable explanation. Justice is just chilling on his couch with a bag of Doritos and a soda watching a movie. Yup, we're just watching Justice watch a movie. Then a knock comes at the door. "Come in dude, it's unlocked."

"Uhh. I can't my hands are full. Can you get the door for me?" The mystery voice explains.
"Dude, not cool. I was just getting to the best part." Justice says as he gets up and gets the door. He opens it to find T-Rex. Rex is backed up to the wall and charges in with a head of steam at Justice. Justice side steps him as Rex runs through the doorway and straight into a wall. The dry wall has a distinct outline of Rex in it now as he falls to the ground. Justice looks at Rex on the ground for a moment and then goes over to his fridge. "Soda?" He offers Rex.

"I don't want your damn soda!" Rex yells as he gets back to his feet. "Alright, more for me I guess." Rex decides to go for broke as he takes a run at Justice again. Once more Justice moves out of the way of the slow moving Rex and he ends up tripping over the couch. Rex falls face first onto the floor while hanging over the edge of the couch. "Dorito?" Justice offers now.

Rex gets himself off the couch now and back to his feet. "I don't want your damn food!" He shouts at Justice. "If you say so dude. So, anything I can get for you?"

"I want you."
"Hmm?"
"I want a rematch with you. Nobody beats T-Rex and gets away with it!"
"Alright."
"Alright?"
"Yeah, that's cool. Frozen Dreams! good for you, man?"
"Uh, yeah."
"Alright, cool dude. Hey, want to watch a movie and chill with me?"
"No, not really."
(C+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/SteveFlash.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/PeterValentine.jpg
-Steve Flash vs. Peter Valentine-

These two veterans squared off here, and what a terrible match it was. I can't believe I'm calling Flash the younger guy here, but even his (relative) youth wasn't enough to drag this match up much from utter suckitude. As for what transpired during the match, Flash was clearly the better wrestler, big shock, I know. Valentine did what he does best, cheat. Valentine took the advantage and wore Flash out doing whatever could to beat him.

Valentine looked as though he was about to set up for a Heart Breaker (Big shoulder breaker). Valentine prepares to lift Flash onto his shoulder when the music hits. Nicky Champion walks out onto the stage. Valentine throws Flash away and prepares for a fight, but Champion just watches on from the stage. It's enough to distract Valentine as Flash rolls him up with a school boy,

1

.
.
.

2

.

.


.


And Valentine kicks out at the last moment. Flash gets back to his feet and goes for Valentine, but gets an elbow to the family jewels for his trouble. Valentine watches Champion over his shoulder for the rest of the match as he regains control of the match. Flash fought valiantly, but Valentines dirty tactics were just too much for the young (relatively speaking) veteran to overcome in the end. Valentine set up for the Heart Breaker again hits it this time. He makes the pin, 1....2....3.

Winner: Peter Valentine in 9:51
Rating (D-)


-Champion claps at Valentines win before pulling out a mic. Valentine cuts him off before he can speak though.

Valentine: "What the hell do you want, kid?"
Champion: "I want to ask you a question Peter."
Valentine: "To squash your dreams now, no, you aren't getting a shot at my championship."

Champion doesn't say anything as the music of USPWs commissioner, Commissioner Doom hits and he makes his way onto the ramp next to Champion.

Doom: "Conflabit, back in my day champions weren't such friggin' chickensh*ts! Frozen Dreams!, you, him, Championship. Doom has spoken."
Valentine: "What? You can't just make me defend this title any time! Sam is going to hear about-"
Doom: "Doom has spoken conflabit! Are you deaf?!"

Doom leaves the stage now and heads back through the curtains. Champion picks up his mic now.

Champion: "How's it feel to know you won't be National Champion this time next week Valentine?"
Valentine: "Why you little punk! You think I won't make you pay for this?"
Champion: "I don't think you can frankly. now why don't you clear out of the ring. I have a match, you know. Watch it and maybe you'll see how a champion should wrestle."

Valentine is furious as he scurries away holding on tight to his championship belt.
(C)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/NickyChampion_alt.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FumihiroOta.jpg
-Nicky Champion vs. Fumihiro Ota-

And in our 'added at the last minute upon the realization that everything else on the card outside the main event is probably going to be a huge flop' match of the night Sam Strongs protege took on the Super Ninja.

The match itself was a fast paced back and forth match between two young guys with bright futures in USPW ahead. And yes, as far as USPW is concerned the 35 year old ninja is still a young guy. He has at least another two decades ahead of him. Anyhow the match ended up as our match of the night. Champion was able to put Ota away with a Hawkeye Hammer in the end and pick up a victory going into his title match on Saturday.

Winner: Nicky Champion in 10:20
Rating (C)

[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Robot Santa. Why is he real dammit!?


-As we did last week we now go backstage to a dark area of the arena where USPW World Champion Enygma stands with his manager Ryddle.

Ryddle: "Baine, the hour of your demise draws ever closer. Enygma will not back down from you nor will he fear you Demon. 'The strongest of all warriors are these two -- Time and Patience.' You have no patience Baine and that shall be your downfall. You can attack us Baine, all you'd like you can. 'That which does not kill me makes me stronger.' You cannot hope to understand what makes Enygma strong.

'My strength is as the strength of ten,
Because my heart is pure.'

Your reign of destruction will come to an end on Saturday Baine, make no mistake of it. 'There is no armour against fate.'"
(C)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Enygma.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Liberty.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/ChrisCaulfield_alt1.jpg
http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/USPW/USPWVS.png
http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/TysonBaine.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/T-Rex_alt1.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/BrucetheGiant.jpg
-Enygma, James Justice & Chris Caulfield vs. Baine, T-Rex & Bruce The Giant-

Well, not quite the rating I was hoping for here.

The match started out as a wild brawl from both teams and didn't end too much differently either. The heels used their strength and size to overpower the faces and overwhelmed them with cheap tactics and double teams. The face team though had a lot more fight than that in them and took the momentum of this match in their favor. The two teams fought wildly and after more than ten minutes of it Chris Caulfield and Bruce The Giant squared off in the middle of the ring. The two of them couldn't be contained in the ring and ended up brawling outside it and eventually both of them resorted to weapons. Bruce tossed Caulfield over the railing and went after him through the crowd as the ref called for a double DQ throwing this match out.

Winners: Draw by Double DQ in 12:05
Rating (C)


-Inside the ring Mustafa sics Baine on Enygma and Justice. Rex gets in and tries to help out his partner, but the Demon takes on both men. Back outside the ring Caulfield and Bruce fight their way through the crowd. Bruce uses his humongous fist to take Caulfield down, it being a weapon in its own right. Caulfield shows ingenuity as he borrows chairs from the fans and uses them on Bruce, smashing them over his skull and stunning the giant. The two of them eventually fight to a clearing from the fans. Caulfield smashes a chair over Bruces head one more time and then looks around to the fans, pointing up at a balcony above the exit. The crowd cheer loudly as Caulfield grabs a table near the exit door and sets it up just right. He lays the Giant down on the table and starts to make his way through the crowd up onto the balcony.

Meanwhile back in the ring The Demon From The Deep manhandles both the World Champion and Justice. Rex gets in his shots, but Baine does most of the work. Rex, wanting approval from his manager drags Justice out of the ring. Justice comes to and starts brawling with Rex. Mustafa yells for Rex to toss him back in to Baine, but Rex won't do it. Justice tries running back into the ring to help out Enygma after he knocks Rex down, but Rex grabs him by the ankle and pulls him back. Rex locks a Jurassic Crush (raised full nelson) onto Justice and dangles him up there jerking him from side to side. Rex tosses him down after a moment and picks Justice up onto his shoulders. Rex nails him with an Extinction as Justice flops onto the ground.

Back up on the balcony Caulfield continues to climb, but before he's even halfway there Bruce lies up from the table and chases after Caulfield. Once Bruce finally reaches him the two start brawling wildly again. Bruce uses his huge fists and Caulfield borrows a few more seats to smash through the giants skull. Eventually the two reach the top of the balcony. Bruce throttles Caulfield by the throat and prepares to toss him over the edge onto the small table below, but Caulfield isn't about to just let him. He wraps his arm around Bruces enormous head not letting go for anything. Bruce lets go of his throat to try to push him off. Caulfield positions himself carefully onto the ledge and drags Bruce over with him. He only gets one of the Giants legs over the railing when Bruce finally breaks free. Caulfield hangs off the edge holding on for dear life. Bruce wastes no time in going for the throat again. This time Caulfield goes right for the nutshot. Bruce keels over, one leg still hangin over the safety railing. Caulfield jumps onto Bruce and drags him down.


The two fall off the ledge and plunge 20 feet down smashing through the table.


Both Bruce and Caulfield are out. EMTs rush to the scene as quickly as they can and tend to the injured men.

Back in the ring it's down to just Baine and Enygma now. Baine looks ready to finish off Enygma when Ryddle jumps in the ring. She stands between Enygma and Baine trying to plead Baine off. Baine just stands there as though awaiting orders. Mustafa doesn't waste long in giving them, telling Baine to get rid of her. Baine does nothing though. Then a familiar theme hits the speakers.


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Shane Sneer makes his way down to the ring and strolls right on in and right up to the Demon, Baine. Mustafa is speechless for once, unsure what to say. Ryddle is confused as well. Sneer hands something to Baine and then gives him a pat on the back. Sneer just flashes a smile Mustafas way as Baine takes a step towards Ryddle. Ryddle backs up, but won't back down. Then Baine uses what Sneer gave him.

From out of Baines hand a fireball shoots out right into Ryddles face. The mask catches fire as Sneer looks to Mustafa once more, grinning. EMTs scramble to make it to the ring now and extinguish the flame, Mustafa wanting in the ring as well. Baine raises his arms into the air as fire rises from the corners and scares the EMTs away, Mustafa as well. Enygma is back up and rips the mask off Ryddle stomping away to put the fire out. He checks to make sure she's okay. He stares a hole right through Baine as Baine stares right back. We fade to black with this shot.

The announcers hype up Frozen Dreams! before we go.

"Does the Demon Baine have Enygmas number or can Enygma get revenge for that heinous attack on Ryddle?"
"Join us this Saturday at Frozen Dreams! and find out brother."
(B-, B+)

Final Rating (C-)
Cable Rating (.96)
-Well, that sucked.


Post Show Recap Brought to you by: Fireballs. Shoot them at your friends today. The Fire Marshall says to:

-Andre Jones defeated Captain USA (E)
-The Hotshots defeated The Hillbillies (E+)
-Jim Force and Alicia Strong defeated Darryl Devine and Belle Bryden (C-)
-Peter Valentine defeated Steve Flash (D-)
-Nicky Champion defeated Fumihiro Ota (C)
-Baine, T-Rex and Bruce The Giant drew with Enygma, James Justice and Chris Caulfield (C)<hr>
http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FrozenDreams.jpg
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Final Card for USPW Frozen Dreams!

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
Hardcore Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
James Justice vs. T-Rex
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine
Toa vs. Andre Jones

3 points for correct winner
1 point for correct match rating

Predictions now welcome. Hopefully the show will be up sometime this weekend.

[Nightshadeex]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)
(B-)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)
(D)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
(D)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
(C)
Hardcore Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
(B-)
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
(C)
James Justice vs. T-Rex
(C+)
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine
(D)
Toa vs. Andre Jones
(D+)

[xopher316]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c) (B-)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c) (C-)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c) (D)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c) (C-)
Hardcore Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant (C-)
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden (C+)
James Justice vs. T-Rex (C-)
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine (D+)
Toa vs. Andre Jones (D)

[MaxxHexx]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c) I think Sneer or T-Rex will be involved.
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c) John Cena at WMXX. The first step up to the top of the company happens here.
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c) It's the future damnit!
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c) I love Brazzles, but she is not going to win here.
Hardcore Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant Either he wins, or he dies!
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden Skill.
James Justice vs. T-Rex The lose here sets up an angle that leads into T-Rex' involvment in the main event.
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine I do not like Jim Force...err, Mr. Jim Force.
Toa vs. Andre Jones THE BADdEST!

[MrOnu]

Ah the Hotshots... I missed them. They are always so entertaining, I'm glad you hired them in this new USPW adventure.

[BYU 14]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c) (B-)

USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c) (C+)

USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c) (C-)

USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c) (D+)

Hardcore Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant (C)

Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden (C-)

James Justice vs. T-Rex (D+)

Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine (C-)

Toa vs. Andre Jones (D)

[Bigpapa42]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
Hardcore Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
James Justice vs. T-Rex
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine
Toa vs. Andre Jones

[J Silver]

More than just Pr0n!?


As the King of my kingdom of Sh*ttsylvania I sit atop my throne. It's quite the lonely place. We don't have much tourism here, the bushes outside are a much nicer place to piss. I'm proud to say though that Sh*ttsylvania is now the proud owners of a laptop computer. I'm led to believe that this piece of technology can be used to connect Sh*ttsyvania with the outside world as I hear the internet is for more than just porn, though I have a hard time believing that ridiculous statement. I hear the internet can be used to find things other than loose women and communicate with people other than strippers. I had just finished the last show and thought to myself 'Hmm, I wonder if anybody talks about wrestling on the internet. And not just that kind with the naked women. Though I'm sure BSC are popular in the internets. I bet they even have their own website. We may not have naked women wrestling, but I still wonder if anyone talks about USPW. I wonder what these perverts think of me and my work.'

I decided to search for USPW. What I came up with was this odd site that told me information. Crazy, huh? It told me USPW stands for United States Prisoner of War. Well, I do feel like a captive of this job and I am being held in a small, smelly, cage-like apparatus. Wow, the internet really can be used for information too. You learn something new everyday. I continued trying to search for USPW but wasn't having much success. Then I tried with USPW Wrestling. Jackpot. The first site I came across was just what I was looking for too, a wrestling news and columns site. I decided to click on the main headline and read it, it has a picture of the USPW logo next to it. This should be good, I can't wait to hear all the positive things that the nice people of the internets are saying.

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/internet2.jpg
PWHits Weekend Update

By: Irving Vans


Sorry I've been gone all month long guys, but I've been on vacation. Cancun FTW bitches. Anyways, I'm back now and ready to recap everything I've missed. It's been a surprisingly good month for signings. Let's get started, shall we?


-In the top story of the month USPW has found themselves with a new head booker, Jacob Stranton. And guess where he's from kids? Hollywood. Yup, USPW got themselves a Hollywood writer to do their booking. So far Stranton seems to be happy making a mockery of everything USPW and stomping all over tradition. Seriously, he had his #1 contenders for the Tag Team Championships mug The Hillbillies this week. Only time will tell if everything he books ends up this Stran-Tastic.

-USPW have signed Samoan Machine to a contract recently. Somewhat exciting news as now I can see Machine on my TV every week. Not so exciting as it has to be USPW TV. They've turned him into some sort of Samoan warrior monk. At least it wasn't some wild Samoan beast. That would've just been ridiculous and offensive.

-In title change news, USPW saw fit to give Samoan Machine a title on his first night in the company. Yup, they gave him.... The Television Title. *Yawn* Come back when they give him a real title, like the Tag Team Championship. Or the Womens Championship. Hey, it's more prestigious.

-And while we're on USPW they've signed Dharma Gregg on as a manager. You know the one, the one from the company of ex-strippers. USPW have said they have no plans of putting her in the ring. I say good call, super soaker matches aren't the best way to try to convince everyone you're still family friendly.

-Indy promo darling, NYCWs Roger Cage has finally moved on up into the big time. SWF signed the youngster to a contract and opted not to send him to developmental. Good news for Cage and SWF, bad news for NYCW. He was one of the only 3 (I believe) wrestlers under 45 (I believe). Average wrestler age there is again 65. And that's just the actives.

-BHOTWG have recently signed one of the top womens wrestlers of all time and one of the most decorated champions in 5SSW history.... to do commentary. Thunder Hike signed the contract about three weeks ago and will participate on the next tour.

-CGC, the down-trodden little Canadian sports entertainment promotion who've been having trouble finding wrestlers that are actually entertaining have found one. They've signed the young Jacob Jett to a contract and seem poised to make a star of him. Good thing too, I'm not sure I could sit through another Whippy The Clown promo. That guy gives me the creeps. I swear If I have to hear one more promo start with "Hello widdle boys and girls..."

-Eien Miyamoto was recalled from PGHWs developmental league last week and onto the main roster. And.... I've got nothing smart assey to say to that. Hey, I ain't a one trick pony, I can do serious too.

-Stone Yoshikawa was also recalled from PGHWs developmental league last week and onto the main roster. Then they fired him. So, why is Miyamoto still there and Yoshikawa not? Simple, Jimbo likes the young blondes better.

-ROF recently released a quarter of their roster citing something about being poor and neglected. Rhys Vali, Nigel Svensson, Martin Heath, Jon Michael Sharp and Gob Narfi were all shown the door. 21CWs Jeff Nova commented "Yeah, Maybe I'll pick them up. Put 'em in a stable called the 'Ring of Flamers.' The five have expressed excitement over that comment. Nobodies had the heart to explain the joke to them yet.

-Finally, in my weekly round-up of TV shows TCW: Awesome, SWF: Yawn, USPW: Complete Suckitude. DVR, I love you. You allow me to skip over all the crap.

And that's that. This is Irving Vans signing off. Until next time folks.


Wow, it's like internet wrestling fans don't actually like wrestling. How peculiar...
<hr>
Prediction Contest Results

Dragonmack- 10 pt.
Nightshadeex- 10 pt.
Bigpapa42- 6 pt.
James Casey- 10 pt.
tristam- 6 pt.
GruntMark- 9 pt.
BYU 14- 12 pt.
xopher316- 6 pt.
1PWfan- 9 pt.
MaxxHexx- 9 pt.

And BYU 14 has won one more.

MTD Standings

BYU 14- 58 pt
Dragonmack- 53 pt
xopher316- 51 pt
MaxxHexx- 36 pt
Bigpapa42- 36 pt
Nightshadeex- 33 pt
Jammy Dodger- 27 pt
GruntMark- 25 pt
SeanMcFly- 24 pt
Angeldelayette- 24 pt
1PWfan- 24 pt
Astil- 18 pt
mistaken- 15 pt
James Casey- 10 pt
tristam- 6 pt
ChrisKid- 6 pt

<hr>
http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FrozenDreams.jpg
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Final Card for USPW Frozen Dreams!

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
James Justice vs. T-Rex
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine
Toa vs. Andre Jones

3 points for correct winner
1 point for correct match rating

Predictions welcome. Hopefully the show will be up sometime this weekend.

[Dragonmack]

Final Card for USPW Frozen Dreams!

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c) C+

USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c) D+

USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
C
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c) C-

Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant C-

Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden C-

James Justice vs. T-Rex C

Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine D+

Toa vs. Andre Jones C

[Beeker]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)
- An unstoppable monster only works as long as he's unstoppable. But Enygma is on a HUGE contract. So... double DQ as Baine goes crazy and Enygma tries to revenge for Ryddle. Quite a puzzle!
Rating: B

USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)
- Deadweight Valentine drops it to the oh-so-young (by USPW standards) Champion. A new champion in Champion! Yay!
Rating: C-

USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
-The Hotshots are most fun when chasing AND if they win the belts, Vessey will use it to pay off some debts. That's no fun.
Rating: C

USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
- Brazzles and the Fooooorce should team up. Those would be epic interviews! And since Raven's done nothing memorable of late. Give it to the crazy girl.
Rating: C+

Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
-For more Aussie interviewing fun. And Caulfield reminds me of Tommy Dreamer who always wants to do the job in the end.
Rating: B-

Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
- Poor muffin. I have no basis for this other than I want Bryden to win.
Rating: C+

James Justice vs. T-Rex
- Nothing phases the Dude, dude.
Rating: D+

Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine
-Jimmy won on TV, bookering 101 says Devine wins here, besides he's got a story going on while Force... has merchandise to sell.
Rating: D+

Toa vs. Andre Jones
- The saddest loses again.
Rating: D
Also... hi J!

[eayragt]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c) (C+)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c) (D+)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c) (D)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c) (D+)
Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant (C)
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden (C-)
James Justice vs. T-Rex (C)
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine (D+)
Toa vs. Andre Jones (D)

I would give explanations... but as I might start up my game as a USPW diary, I wont.

[GruntMark]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c) B-
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c) D+
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c) D
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c) C
Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant C-
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden C+
James Justice vs. T-Rex C+
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine D
Toa vs. Andre Jones D

[SeanMcFly]

Hate to do the long bump, but It seems he always gets stuck on Frozen Dreams :p

For those who haven't read this yet, you need to read it, because this is probably one of the best on the board.

[Dragonmack]

This is J Silver we are talking about here. Where others update once a week, he takes the long view and updates once a year! :p

But, assuming he isn't dead, or rotting in a prison in the Middle East somewhere, I think he will make one of his sporadic returns in a month or so.

[Beeker]

Hate to do the long bump, but It seems he always gets stuck on Frozen Dreams :p

For those who haven't read this yet, you need to read it, because this is probably one of the best on the board.

Yes it is a great dynasty but it's a pretty crappy thing to do those who know and have read and love this piece of insanely comedic brilliance to bump it after so long.

It should be something left for J Silver to do, since I had hoped and expected something from him. Not a pointless bump from a fanboy.

On some boards you'd get a warning for that.

[Nightshadeex]

He was on the boards today.

[J Silver]

Hate to do the long bump, but It seems he always gets stuck on Frozen Dreams :p Damn you Frozen Dreams! Thou are my undoing!
*Play nice now boys. Don't you make me turn this car around.
This is J Silver we are talking about here. Where others update once a week, he takes the long view and updates once a year! :pMy teachers always did call me slow...
But, assuming he isn't dead, or rotting in a prison in the Middle East somewhere, I think he will make one of his sporadic returns in a month or so.I ain't dead yet, just look at the Mods forum for proof of that. I'll make my return eventually, but right now I'm just on a hiatus. I meant to post something about the hiatus. Also meant to post the PPV. Meant to water that plant too. Anyway, life needs my attention right now, and tbh it was pretty stupid of me to start this dynasty up when I did. Once I've taken care of things I'll be back at this though. PPV's actually about a third written already.

Teaser for the PPV below:

-Our cameraman is backstage in the locker room of Nicky Champion who has Alicia Strong with him for company. Champion is getting ready for his match as he tapes up his wrists and pulls his pads on. Strong seems to be getting ready for her own match as well.


Alicia: "I know you won't need it Nicky, but good luck out there against Valentine."
Champion: "Of course I don't need luck, but glad you're wishing it on me anyway."
Alicia: "Now don't get c0cky on me, he's going to cheat like heck to try to beat you."
Champion: "But he won't. Just like Bryden won't beat you tonight."
Alicia: "I can't wait to put her in her place."

Champion: "And I know you will."

Champion stands up and walks over to Alicia. He places his hand on her shoulder as she turns toward him, looking him in the eyes.

Champion: "Then we can go out and celebrate. Just you, me, and my shiny new gold belt."
Alicia: "I'd like that."

The two just look into each others eyes for a moment, both silent, a grin on both their faces. And then...



"Big night tonight brother!" Sam yells as he barges into Champions locker room. Champion and Alicia gasp as Strong walks in, a look of terror engulfing them, not too dissimilar to that of a child whose parent walks in on them 'discovering the joys of puberty.' Champion and Alicia quickly get their distances from each other.

Champion: "Sam, hey. I didn't know you were here."
Sam: "Well brother, you would if you had been watching the show. Guess you were too busy focusing on your match tonight. Good boy, just like I taught you."
Champion: "Yup, just been focusing on that."
Sam: "What are you doing here, Muffin? Ah, what does it matter? It's like a family reunion brother. I just came down to the arena tonight to wish you two luck out there in your matches. This one's a big one for you Nicky, you're gonna win your first National Championship tonight. Then you're on your way right up to the World Championship. I'm proud of you brother. And my little Muffin, you can finally prove to that narcissistic egomaniac that she isn't queen of anything around here. Shut her up tonight Muffin."
Champion: "Yes, sir. Will do."
Alicia: "Thank you daddy."

Sam: "And when you two win I'm taking us all out to the steak house. My treat."

Alicia and Nicky exchange a glance momentarily as Sam rambles on about their dinner plans tonight.

Alicia: "Sounds... great, daddy."

Sam: "Great. Well, I'll let you two get back to getting ready. I have a few things to take care of, but I'll be watching both of your matches. Good luck out there."

Sam Strong leaves the two to themselves again. They both let out a deep sigh of relief and actually have a bit of a laugh once they're sure Sam is far enough away from the door.
(C+)

[J Silver]

http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d105/jsilver536/Diary/FDPromo.jpg

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FrozenDreams.jpg
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Final Card for USPW Frozen Dreams!

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
James Justice vs. T-Rex
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine
Toa vs. Andre Jones

3 points for correct winner
1 point for correct match rating

OOC: So, I think my hiatus has had enough time. Frozen Dreams! will be posted on Monday so anyone who still wants to get in predictions is welcome to do so. Top three predictors will win a prize this month, prize tbd. After Frozen Dreams! I feel I can probably handle one show a week to be posted every Monday.

Oh, and...
Also... hi J!
Hi Beeker!

[Dragonmack]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
James Justice vs. T-Rex
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine
Toa vs. Andre Jones

[Hyde Hill]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
James Justice vs. T-Rex
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine
Toa vs. Andre Jones

[Bigpapa42]

I won't lie - I freaking love that poster.

[Candyman]

I won't lie - I freaking love that poster.

Seconded.

[Nightshadeex]

USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)
USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)
USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)
USPW Women's Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)
Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant
Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden
James Justice vs. T-Rex
Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine
Toa vs. Andre Jones

[J Silver]

USPW: Where we've had 5 shows in 103 days.

Not too shabby if I do say so myself. Now on with the show...
<hr>

http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d105/jsilver536/Diary/FDPromo.jpg

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FrozenDreams.jpg
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USPW Frozen Dreams! (Part 1)
Saturday, Week 4, January 2010
Held at The Louisianna Auditorium
Att. 10,000



Dark Matches

-(USPWs new best match ever, but you'll never know what it is Dark Match) (B-)



Main Show


-We start off tonights show with a cold open package highlighting all of the feuds culminating tonight and focusing most of its time on tonights main event between Baine and USPW World Champion Enygma.
(B)


-Our announcers hype up the show to everyone watching at home as the opening fireworks displays plays out through the arena. The announcers get word that someone special has just entered the arena. We get a camera backstage to the arena entrance as USPW Owner Sam Strong enters the building. The crowd explode at the sight of the legendary Strong. The announcers speculate over what Sam Strong could be doing here tonight.
(B+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/SamoanMachine.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/AndreJones_alt.jpg
-Toa vs. Andre Jones-


We start off our PPV with a non-title match between two distinctly different competitors. Toa comes down to the ring and enters the ropes with a no non-sense approach while 'Tha Baddest' Andre Jones showboats down to the ring and yells at those smartass fans who chant 'Tha saddest' his way.

The bell rings and Toa explodes with a clothesline that nearly takes Jones out of his boots. Toa picks him up and drags him into the corner barraging him with a series of kicks to the gut. Jones slumps into the corner and Toa runs across the ring and builds up a head of steam before scraping his boot across Jones face. The match continues with Toa in control for a few minutes until 'Tha Baddest' can figure out the plate # of the truck that hit him. He then pokes that truck in the eye. Jones takes advantage of his cheap ploy immediately rolling The Samoan Warrior up and grabbing onto the ropes for leverage. The ref counts,


1

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.

2

.

.


.



And Toa gets his shoulder up at the last moment. Jones is furious and argues that the ref counted slow because he's intimidated by 'Tha Baddest.' Toa rolls back up to his feet, eyes still not focused. Jones gets to work on Toa quickly giving him a few punches to the head and a few chops before planting him with a DDT. Jones continues to beat on Toa while he's down and then sets up for a Blast From The Past (Fame-asser). Jones waits for The Samoan Warrior to get up and then goes for it. Toa straightens himself upright and Jones misses it going stumbling forward. Toa grabs Jones and locks him into The Unbreakable Sleeper. Jones holds out as long as he can, but taps out after just a few seconds.

Winner: Toa in 11:53
Rating (D)


-We go backstage to the arena entrance once more where Sheik Mustafa is pacing back and forth in front of the door. T-Rex is standing by with him. Mustafa is clearly worried and screaming to Rex wondering aloud about where Baine is. Mustafa looks like he's losing his mind not knowing where Baine is or why Sneer helped him with the fireball incident on Wednesday night. Then his answer walks right through the door. Shane Sneer walks through accompanied by Baine, Jumbo Jackson, Anger and The Towers of Power.

Sneer glances over and notices Mustafa. A grin creeps onto Sneers face before he tells Mustafa, "I told you Sheiky, Sneer Corp gets what Sneer Corp wants." Sneer and Corp. walk on ignoring Mustafa.

The Sheik is furious as he stomps up and down screaming obscenities Sneers way and appears to be trying to pull his hair out through his headdress.
(C-)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DavisWayneNewton_alt2.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/CameronVessey_alt2.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FreddieDatsun.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DesDavids-1.jpg
-USPW Tag Team Championship Match- The Hotshots vs. The Peoples Team (c)-


It may take the crowd some time to give a damn about The Hotshots, but this was definitely a good way to start. The match turned out to be a surprisingly even back and forth affair between these two teams which surprised The People's Team. Though with names like Rip Chord and The Vessey Brothers responsible for training the youngsters it shouldn't come as much of a surprise.

The Hotshots used every dirty trick in the book as they took charge of this match wearing down Datsun and Davids. I'd also say it's worth noting that Vessey went through Datsun's jacket pockets seemingly looking for his wallet during the match. In the end though The experience of The People's Team pulled through as Datsun was able to hit the Patriot Press on Vessey, 1...2....3.

Winners: The Peoples Team in 8:42
Rating (D)


-Our cameraman is backstage in the locker room of Nicky Champion who has Alicia Strong with him for company. Champion is getting ready for his match as he tapes up his wrists and pulls his pads on. Strong seems to be getting ready for her own match as well.


Alicia: "I know you won't need it Nicky, but good luck out there against Valentine."
Champion: "Of course I don't need luck, but I'm glad you're wishing it on me anyway."
Alicia: "Now don't get c0cky on me, he's going to cheat like heck to try to beat you."
Champion: "But he won't. Just like Bryden isn't going to beat you tonight."
Alicia: "I can't wait to put her in her place."

Champion: "And I know you will."

Champion stands up and walks over to Alicia. He places his hand on her shoulder as she turns toward him, looking him in the eyes.

Champion: "Then we can go out and celebrate. Just you, me, and my shiny new gold belt."
Alicia: "I'd like that."

The two just look into each others eyes for a moment, both silent, a grin on both their faces. And then...


"Big night tonight brother!" Sam yells as he barges into Champions locker room. Champion and Alicia gasp as Strong walks in, a look of terror engulfing them, not too dissimilar to that of a child whose parent walks in on them 'discovering the joys of puberty.' Champion and Alicia quickly get their distances from each other.

Champion: "Sam, hey. I didn't know you were here."
Sam: "Well brother, you would if you had been watching the show. Guess you were too busy focusing on your match tonight. Good boy, just like I taught you."
Champion: "Yup, just been focusing on that."
Sam: "What are you doing here, Muffin? Ah, what does it matter? It's like a family reunion brother. I just came down to the arena tonight to wish you two luck out there in your matches. This one's a big one for you Nicky, you're gonna win your first National Championship tonight. Then you're on your way right up to the World Championship. I'm proud of you brother. And my little Muffin, you can finally prove to that narcissistic egomaniac that she isn't queen of anything around here. Shut her up tonight Muffin."
Champion: "Yes, sir. Will do."
Alicia: "Thank you daddy."

Sam: "And when you two win I'm taking us all out to the steak house. My treat."

Alicia and Nicky exchange a glance momentarily as Sam rambles on about their dinner plans tonight.

Alicia: "Sounds... great, daddy."

Sam: "Great. Well, I'll let you two get back to getting ready. I have a few things to take care of, but I'll be watching both of your matches. Good luck out there."

Sam Strong leaves the two to themselves again. They both let out a deep sigh of relief and actually have a bit of a laugh once they're sure Sam is far enough away from the door.
(C+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/SuzanneBrazzle1.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/RavenNightfall_alt2.jpg
-USPW Womens Championship Match- Brazzles vs. Raven Robinson (c)-


This was an interesting match to say the least. Before the bell rang Brazzles just stood there staring into space with her head slightly c0cked to the right. As soon as the bell rang though Brazzles stopped smiling and immediately started a viscous assault on the champion. A few punches right to the face before Robinson even knew what had hit her took her to her knees. Brazzles continued by clubbing at the bandaged ear that she had bitten just days prior. The match continued as Brazzles beat violently on the champion, ripping the bandage off her ear and reopening the wound.

Robinson didn't seem like she stood a chance against Brazzles as she was laid throat first across the middle rope and choked with Brazzles knee. The ref counted to 5, Brazzles getting off at 4 and then going right back to choking doing this twice more. The third time Raven was prepared as she turned around and tossed Brazzles out of the ring. She caught her breath as the challenger fell to the floor.

Brazzles scrambles back into the ring and heads straight at Robinson, but she's prepared catching her with a small package. The ref counts,

1

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.
.

2

.


.


.


And Brazzles kicks out. Seemingly infuriated Brazzles picks Robinson up and prepares to deliver a DDT, but the champ counters and flips her over with a Northern Lights suplex bridging into a pin, 1.....2.... and Brazzles gets her shoulder up.

Brazzles gets back to her feet and this time waits for her opponent setting her up for The Miracle Connection (Super kick). Robinson makes her way to her feet and Brazzles attempts it. Raven catches her foot and then sweeps the other leg out from under her. She grabs it and turns her over setting her up in a Night Crawler (Lion tamer). Brazzles screams in pain and crawls desperately toward the ropes. Robinson tries to keep her away by pulling her back to the center of the ring. Brazzles raises her hand looking as though she's going to tap.

She slams her hand down onto the mat and then pulls hard knocking Robinson off balance and allowing her to crawl to the ropes for a break. Robinson and Brazzles get back to their feet and go at each other, Robinson getting the better of Brazzles this time. Robinson is able to knock the challenger down multiple times and then goes for a Night Faller (Reverse DDT), but Brazzles fights out of it spinning around and then grabbing her legs out from under her. Brazzles looks like she's trying to apply the Night Crawler to the champ now as she tries to roll her over. Robinson makes it to the ropes to get the break.

That doesn't stop Brazzles from turning her over and locking it in anyways. The ref begins to count to 5, trying to pull Brazzles off. At 4 Brazzles drops the hold and gets in the refs face. It proves costly though as Robinson catches her from behind with a Night Faller. She makes the pin,

1

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2

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.



.



3. The champion retains!


Winner: Raven Robinson in 13:18
Rating (C-)


-The camera is zoomed in backstage on the door of Commissioner Doom as knocking can be heard.

Doom: "Go away! I'm busy!"

The door opens and into the room walks Sam Strong. Strong doesn't look too pleased as he enters and takes a look at Doom who seems to be staring at the wall.


Strong: "What the heck are you doing in here brother?"
Doom: "Conflabit, can't you see this here wall challenged me to a staring contest? Now I ain't gonna let no wall get no satisfaction outta calling me a chicken and let it get away with it."
Strong: "What?"
Doom: "Don't try and play dumb with me, I bet you're in cahoots with this here wall. You ain't gonna trick me again wall!"


Strong: "I ain't here about a wall brother-"
Doom: "Bet that's what the danged wall told you to say. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twenty times, Shame on Reagan."
Strong: "I'm here about your job performance, brother. Do you know how many complaints I've gotten about you since I gave you this job?"
Doom: "Conflabbed wall's trying to frame me again."
Strong: "The wall isn't trying to frame you brother, it's just a wall."
Doom: "That's just what it wants you to think, then when you lower your guard it steals your lucky charms."
Strong: "Right. Doom, I hate to do this, but you're fired."


Doom: "Dang wall put you up to this, didn't it?"
Strong: "Yeah, it's the wall that made me do it brother."
Doom: "Conflabit, I knew it. I forgive you Sam, it ain't your fault your mind ain't as strong as mine."


Strong whistles and security guards come into the room. They pick Doom up and escort him out.


Doom: "I haven't blinked wall! You haven't won!"
(C+)



http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/NickyChampion_alt-1.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/PeterValentine.jpg
-USPW National Championship Match- Nicky Champion vs. Peter Valentine (c)-


This was a contest of new school vs old school as Nicky Champion took on Peter Valentine. Valentine knew his title was on the line and took no chances as he employed the cowardly technique of hit & run tactics. The bell rang to begin the match and as Champion went to lock up with Valentine, he slid out of the ring going for a brisk walk on the outside as the ref started to count. Nicky tried to go after him, but the ref stopped him from. Valentine slid back into the ring long enough to break the count and went right back to strolling around.

Champion was growing furious and shoved the ref out of his way. He got out of the ring and chased Valentine around it. After a whole lap of chasing Valentine slid back into the ring, Champion right behind him and then slid back out. Champion followed as Valentine rounded a corner and stopped. He kicked the steel steps right in front of Champion tripping him up. Valentine wasted no time and was stomping away at him. He threw Nicky back into the ring and followed taking advantage of his cheap tactic.

From here Valentine kept control of the match with other various cheap tactics such as a poke in the eye or a knee to the family jewels. Valentine seemed to have the youngster done for as he set him up for the Heart Breaker (Big shoulder breaker). Valentine went to drive Champion down, but he slipped out the back. Champion sprang off the ropes and caught Valentine with a clothesline to the back of the neck.

Champion gestured to the crowd pumping his fist signaling that he was going to finish this. He positioned himself on the middle rope and laid in wait for Valentine. Once he was up Champion dropped down and caught him with a Hawkeye Hammer (Middle rope hammer drop). Nicky made the pin,


1
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.

2
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.
.

3. Nicky Champion is the new National Champion!

Winner and NEW Champion: Nicky Champion in 9:21
Rating (D+)


-Backstage in the interview area Seduction is with Alicia Strong, ready to interview her before her match with Belle Bryden.


Seduction: "I'm here with Alicia Strong as she prepares to take on Belle Bryden tonight. Now Belle has had your number in the past Alicia and she seems intent on beating you again tonight. What are you thinking as you go into this match tonight?"
Alicia: "Well Seduction, I'm thinking that-"


"Scooby-Dooby-Dooooo!"


Both Alicia and Seduction stop and look in confusion as Brazzles screams out a line straight from a cartoon. She seems to be playing the part too as she's squatted down on all fours. Alicia then looks up as she sees who's with her.


"You're thinking that you'll never beat me, and you'd be right Princess." Bryden says as she enters the scene. She pats Brazzles on the head, "Good moron. Have a Scooby Snack." She tosses a frozen Hot Pocket on the ground for her. Bryden approaches Alicia.


Alicia: "What are you doing here Belle?"
Bryden: "My ears were ringing. I thought you might be talking about me."
Alicia: "I was just about to in fact."
Bryden: "Nothing I'm sure you wouldn't mind saying to my face."
Alicia: "I'd love to tell you what I think of you to your face."


"Ruh-roh!" Brazzles shouts out, interrupting the confrontation. "Shut up and eat your damn Scooby Snack!" Bryden yells at her. Brazzles goes back to gnawing on the frozen Hot Pocket.


Alicia: "Can't even be nice to your friends, can you?"
Bryden: "She isn't my friend, she just won't stop following me around."
Alicia: "So what, she isn't 'worthy' of being your friend?"


Bryden looks down at Brazzles still gnawing away at the frozen Hot Pocket.


Bryden: "No, no she isn't. Why don't you be her friend Princess? Unless of course you're all talk."


Alicia bends down to put her hand on Brazzles shoulder when she freaks out and jumps up into Brydens arms, teeth chattering as if she's afraid. Or seen a ghost. Or someone in a ghost costume.


Alicia: "Guess she likes you more."


"Get off of me!" Bryden exclaims to Brazzles before dropping her flat on her ass. Brazzles then hugs the leg of Bryden who tries to shake her off. Alicia can't help but laugh at the misfortune of her foe. "You think this is funny, huh? Well, we'll see how much you're laughing after our match Princess!" Bryden walks off to prepare for her match dragging Brazzles on her foot the whole way.
(C+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/AliciaStrong_alt1.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/BelleBryden_alt5.jpg
-Alicia Strong vs. Belle Bryden-


Holy manatees on fire Batman, this match was fan-frickin-tastic! And the two of them have bad chemistry together.

Both the competitors make their way down to the ring and take their respective corners. The announcers gets into the ring and announces the two of them, giving this match much more of a big fight feel. The crowd cheer on Alicia as she's introduced and boo Bryden as she is. Bryden though snatches the mic from the announcer after her introduction to correct him, "That's 'The Beautiful' Belle Bryden. Get it right next time." She shooed the announcer out of the ring and then waited for the bell.

Once the bell rang this match was on, and I mean on. The two jumped out of their corners and just started pummeling away at each other, Alicia getting the better of the exchange and gaining control over Bryden. She began to wear her rival down with various holds, but Bryden wasn't about to let Alicia have the satisfaction of controlling this match. She pulled a small mirror out of her pocket and as Strong tried to pull her up blew the make-up dust into her face. Strong was blinded, maybe the ref too as he didn't see anything. Bryden took Strong down with a roundhouse straight to the head.

Bryden then used the mirror to check her face. She put it back in her pocket and made the cover, 1....2... Strong gets her shoulder up. Bryden gets up and goes after Strongs knees stomping away at them and slamming them down onto the mat wearing her down for a Blonde Ambition (Figure 4). Bryden continued the onslaught on Strongs knees going through every move she knows to hurt the knees, before finally going for the Blonde Ambition. She grabs Strongs leg twisting it and then drops down to lock the other leg in place successfully applying the hold.

Strong screams in pain as her knees have been worn down by Bryden. Strong tries pulling herself towards the ropes, but Belle just pulls her back into the center of the ring. Strong, after trying to crawl to the ropes twice more eventually decides to try to roll her over. She rocks from side to side, Bryden trying to counter it until... Strong rolls them over, Belle now screaming in pain. She crawls to the ropes and the hold is broken.

Both women now head to their feet. Bryden gets up just fine, but Strong has trouble hobbling back up. Belle kicks at the knees of Strong to send her back down. Bryden waits for Strong to stand again before she goes for a Dish of The Day (Roundhouse to the back of the head). She looks for it, but Strong ducks under it. She pushes Bryden forward into the ropes. Alicia runs at her looking to nail the Strong Arm Tactic (Running elbow), but Bryden stops herself at the ropes and moves out of the way.

Bryden looks to take advantage of Strong again and goes for a right, but Strong blocks it and delivers her own. Bryden goes for it again, but Strong blocks it again delivering another one of her own. Then she hits her with another, and another before taking Bryden off her feet with a strong knife edge chop. Bryden gets back to her feet and is sent back down with a running forearm. Bryden gets back up and Strong sends her up in a suplex, sustaining it and holding Bryden in the air for a few seconds before dropping her back down.

Strong waits for her to get up again from across the ring smacking her elbow, signaling for another Strong Arm Tactic. Bryden gets up and gets hit with it. She goes down and Strong makes the cover,


1

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2

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3.


Winner: Alicia Strong in 12:39
Rating (B-) (!!!)


(----End of Part 1----)
<hr> OOC: Part 2 will be up tomorrow, Tuesday, June 15, 2010. Choke on that non-believers.
Nice to see the humor is still in place, although i missed seeing the Hotshots with their usual banter.Don't worry, that's in part 2.

[eayragt]

OOC: Part 2 will be up tomorrow.

Yeah, yeah, whatever :p.

Just very jealous of that B- Women's match.

[Dragonmack]

Nice to see the humor is still in place, although i missed seeing the Hotshots with their usual banter. And remember eayragt, no matter what day it is, there is always a tomorrow after it. So he is correct in saying that he will post tomorrow ( although which tomorrow is up in the air.... :p )

[Astil]

Herp Derp

[xopher316]

"Ruh-roh!" Brazzles shouts out, interrupting the confrontation. "Shut up and eat your damn Scooby Snack!" Bryden yells at her. Brazzles goes back to gnawing on the frozen Hot Pocket.

That line had me in tears!

P.S.
That is a nice poster.

[J Silver]

USPW: Where it's Tuesday.

Yeah, that's right. On with the rest of the show...
<hr>

http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d105/jsilver536/Diary/FDPromo.jpg

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/FrozenDreams.jpg
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USPW Frozen Dreams! (Part 2)
Saturday, Week 4, January 2010
Held at The Louisianna Auditorium
Att. 10,000



Main Show (Cont'd)


-We go once again backstage to our interview area as Seduction stands by with Chris Caulfield.


Seduction: "Now Chris, tonight you're going to be taking on Bruce The Giant for the #1 Contendership to the World Championship and in a hardcore match of all things."
Caulfield: "Hardcore by my request."
Seduction: "What could possibly be going through your mind right now?"


Caulfield: "Well Seduction, once upon a time I was part of this little promotion called Danger and Violence Extreme."


Caulfield pauses as the crowd begin a 'DaVE' chant, smiling to himself as they continue on.


Caulfield: "Now back in Danger and Violence Extreme we used to put on matches with no rules. Any weapon, any hold, any cheap tactic it was all fair game. This is my kind of environment and tonight Bruce gets to learn just why they call me 'The Hardcore American.' I won our last match Bruce and I plan on making it two in a row tonight before I go on to win the World Championship."


Caulfield stops as he hears a loud creaking sound. He turns around as the set starts to fall down. He pushes Seduction out of the way as the large TV and the steel it's holding onto fall on top of him. Caulfield goes down as we see what caused the set to fall, Bruce The Giant. Bruce seems to have a ref with him who calls for the bell to start this match.
(B)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/ChrisCaulfield_alt1.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/BrucetheGiant.jpg
-Hardcore #1 Contenders Match- Chris Caulfield vs. Bruce The Giant-


Bruce looks down on Caulfield as he walks over the toppled set and stands over him, crushing him under the steel. The Giant picks up the steel and pulls Caulfield out before he makes the pin,

1

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.

2

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.



And Caulfield gets his shoulder up just before the three. Bruce stands up pulling Caulfield up with him by the hair, The Hardcore American coughing up blood. Bruce drags him by the hair down the hall, Caulfield follows not wanting his hair ripped from his head. The Giant tosses him back first into a wall, Caulfield leaving a nice-sized dent in it. Bruce dominates this match as he pulls Caulfield with him and tosses him around into various objects. Bruce drags the Hardcore American all the way out to the ring and tosses him down the steel ramp. The Giant continues to dominate his smaller opponent now using what weapons he finds under the ring.


Bruce is ready to finish Caulfield off with a Giant Chokeslam. He grabs him by the throat and then receives a kick to the groin from Caulfield. Bruce keels over as Caulfield drops down onto his knees and crawls out of the ring. He looks under the ring and finds weapons. From here Caulfield just assaults the Giant with any weapon he can find until said weapon breaks or gets too bent out of shape. This continues for a few moments, Bruce trying to fight back. Caulfield then decides to try something special. He grabs a chair and climbs the turnbuckles.


Caulfield perches on the top rope with a chair in one hand and the other balancing him. Bruce falls onto the ropes to unbalance Caulfield who falls down onto the top turnbuckle dropping his chair. Bruce gets up and walks over. He grabs Caulfield by the throat and steps over the top rope positioning himself on the apron. He jumps off bringing Caulfield with him and driving him down onto the announcers table, it breaking as Caulfield is slammed through it. The Giant clears off some debris from on top of Caulfield and makes the pin,


1
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.
.

2

.

.

.

3.


Winner: Bruce The Giant in 8:33
Rating (C-)


-We now catch up once more with Belle Bryden who's walking down the halls clearly in a bad mood. Not helping is probably her ... something, Brazzles who's sniffing out clues on all fours next to her. "Ruh roh." Brazzles lets out. "Ruh roh what, you moron?" Bryden then listens as she hears something not too far from them.


"You lost! You freakin' morons lost to those two! What the hell did I tell you when I let you two join me?"
"You didn't tell us much."
"Yeah, you mostly just threatened and gestured wildly."


Bryden gets closer and hides behind a stack of crates while Devine, Wayne and Vessey work out their problem. "Scooby Dooby Dooo-" Brazzles tries to howl before Bryden stuffs another frozen Hot Pocket in her mouth. Or maybe it's the same one as before, who's to say really? "Shut up you. Understand?" Brazzles just chews blissfully on her Scooby Snack.


DD: "So, anyone wanna tell me why I put up with you guys?"
Vessey: "Because you love us?"
DD: "Yeah, let's try using facts this time."
Vessey: "Because we're the best you could do on such short notice?"
DD: "Yeah, that's probably it. And would you mind explaining to me why you stopped as you were about to get Datsun in a Vessey Driver to look through his pockets?"


Vessey: "Yeah, my shark's kinda coming down hard on me."
DD: "Your shark?"
Vessey: "Yeah, he's all like 'I want my money.' and I'm all like 'Well, I don't have it.' And he's like 'Well, you better get it.' and then I'm like 'Well, I'm trying.' and then he's all like 'Well, you better try harder. Or else.' and I'm like 'Or else what?' and then-"
DD: "Shut up! I get it. You borrowed too much money, gambled it away and now someone's gonna break your kneecaps if you don't have it."
Vessey: "Actually he said he was going to break my shins."
DD: "Whatever. Do you know what you should do about that?"
Vessey: "Ooo, I know this one. It's like my Uncle Bryan always does when he pisses off Jehovahs Witnesses, nuns, KKK members, girl scouts and/or postal workers. The 3 P's."
Wayne: "3 P's?"
Vessey: "Yup, purchase a piece, pray and practice your aim."


Wayne: "Remind me not knock on your Uncle Bryans door early in the morning."
Vessey: "Good luck getting to the door. Those dogs were weened off kibble and onto human flesh. He calls them zombie-weilers."
Wayne: "That's a little disturbing."


DD: "You two morons done yet?"
Vessey: "Actually I do have a delightfully hilarious story about a zombie-weiler, a girl scout and a misplaced shotgun."
DD: "I don't want to hear it."
Vessey: "You sure?"
DD: "Yeah, pretty sure."
Vessey: "Are you absolutely sure, because this story has a lot of hatred in it and you seem like a hateful kind of guy."


DD: "Shut up about the damn dogs already. Do you two actually wonder why you're such losers? It's because you don't take anything seriously. You could've had the Tag Team Championships, but you were more worried about paying back your shark. And your solution for your shark? Shoot him. You know what you should do? Stop gambling!"
Vessey: "Hey, I have a legitimate reason for gambling!"
Wayne: "Addiction isn't a legit reason."
Vessey: "I have a reason for gambling!"


DD: "Maybe if you two were addicted to winning we'd have something to celebrate for a change. Divinity doesn't need losers, it needs winners. Either start winning or I'll replace you. Understood?"


Devine walks off for his match now as we join Bryden and Brazzles again behind the crate. Bryden smiles deviously as she states "I have an idea." "Ruh roh." Brazzles once more says. Bryden just stuffs the 'Scooby Snack' back into her mouth like a pacifier in the mouth of a baby. "Why do I even bother talking to you? It's like talking to a wall."


And just as Bryden says that, "You'll never make me blink, wall! You'll never get me!" Shouts out Corporal Doom as he runs down the hallway, two security guards hot in pursuit.
(D+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/JimForce.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Devine_alt2.jpg
-Jim Force vs. Darryl Devine-


I suppose this could be described as your average match between a middle-aged psychotic man and a young up-and-comer. Then again I have no idea what that would look like. This match however was surprisingly good, especially considering it involved Force.


The psychotic power and paint powerhouse started this match off by taking some wild swings at Devine. Devine was caught off guard and Force took control of the match. He kept control as well wearing Devine down with a barrage of power moves, all three that he knows in fact. Devine, to his credit was able to take control of this match back with a simple poke to the eyes. Force began swinging wildly in any direction and Devine took him down with a dropkick to the knees. Devine took control of the match from here taking Force apart with a large array of attacks and a few cheap shots as well.


Devine looks to end it now setting up Force for a Devine Dream Drop (RKO/Cutter). He goes for it and Force shoves him off sending Devine back first onto the canvas. He gets up and walks right into a FOOOOOOOOORCE~! Punch. HE goes down and gets back up just to be on the receiving end of another FOOOOOORCE~! Punch and then once more for a third. Force shakes the ropes wildly and hoists Devine up into the air keeping him suspended there for a few moments before going for the Full Force (Jackhammer) Force staggers around a bit before looking to plant Devine into the canvas. He goes for it, but someone holds onto his leg and Force lets Devine go. Devine wastes no time and hits the Devine Dream Drop and makes the cover,

1
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2
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3. Devine picks up the victory. He then looks outside to see who helped him to find Belle Bryden. Devine looks at her cautiously unsure of what she wants.


Winner: Darryl Devine in 10:59
Rating (C)


-We go again backstage to what's left of our interview area. Seduction is there with Sneer Corp., Sneer, Anger, Muscles, Rushmore, Jackson and now Baine.


Seduction: "I'm joined now by Shane Sneer and his Sneer Corp. Welcome Shane."
Sneer: "That's Mr. Sneer, dear. Please be a little more respectful, especially in my presence."
Seduction: "Sorry, Mr. Sneer welcome."


Sneer: "Thank you doll, I can take this interview from here. I asked for this time so that I could properly introduce someone to the Sneer Corp. family, our newest member Baine. Now Baine here is a winner and I hope that the rest of my Sneer Corp. family will be able to pick up on some of that little trait from him. Now Baine is going to bring our family gold tonight and he's going to do it by simply crushing Enygma, a feat no one else has been able to do up to this point. Baine is going to lead Sneer Corp. into a prosperous new future."


Sneer is cut off as Jumbo Jackson is seen in the background picking up the sets TV and smashing it against a wall in anger.


Jackson: "You saying I'm not good enough Sneer!?"
Sneer: "I'm not saying you're not good enough Jumbo, I'm just going by what I've seen and winning hasn't been seen nearly enough."


Jackson grabs Sneer by the throat and screams "So you think I'm a loser!?" Sneer tries to gurgle something out, but has no luck. Then Jackson lets go as he finds a hand squeezing his own throat, Baines. Baine lifts Jackson up with one hand and slams him down onto the pile of rubble that was once the interview set. The Demon then looks up and scans the area looking at the rest of Sneer Corp., all taking a collective step backwards. Sneer massages his throat as he prepares to speak again.


Sneer: "You see that? That is pure domination and until you learn to dominate your opponents as easily as Baine just did, he's the only one of you that matters. Learn from his example and don't disappoint me. If you do..." Sneer looks down at the body of Jumbo Jackson sprawled out on the floor unconscious.


"Now as for Enygma, you can make this real easy on yourself and just lie down, let Baine have the pin and the title and I promise on my mothers grave that Baine won't hurt you tonight. Though if your pride gets in the way of your logic or reason and you want to try avenging your burnt little whats-her-name you'll be joining her in the hospital. Baine won't stop until you're hanging onto your life by the skin of your teeth and who's to say he'll stop there. Make it easy on yourself Enygma, just give up the belt, it's not worth it. But If you decide that title's more important than your life then so be it, you won't walk out of here with either one."
(B-)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Liberty.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/T-Rex_alt1.jpg
-James Justice vs. T-Rex w/ Mustafa-


A decent match here as T-Rex took on James Justice. Rex went into the match with something to prove to Mustafa, that he deserves as much of his attention as Baine. Not that Mustafa has much of a choice now. The match started with Rex taking control of the smaller Justice. He wailed on him with heavy strikes and a few power moves before going for his rarely used finisher, The Extinction (Spinning Argentine backbreaker drop). He gets Justice up onto his shoulders, but Justice begins to squirm. Rex tries to hold him in place, but can't. Justice slips out back.


He grabs Rex by the shoulder and gets him to turn around nailing him with a Justice Big Left Punch right to the face. Justice then rocks him with a few left jabs before nailing another Justice Big Left that takes Rex off his feet. Justice springs off the ropes to gain a bit of momentum and then drops down onto Rex with a splash. He covers him, 1...2.. Rex tosses him off. The Jurassic Power makes his way back to his feet and is caught with a Liberation Slam (Uranage/Rock Bottom). Justice makes the cover,

1

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2

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3.

Winner: James Justice in 9:04
Rating (C-)


-Rex crawls over to where Mustafa is to plead with his manager, but Mustafa has had enough and storms off leaving Rex to himself. Rex can't seem to believe Mustafa is abandoning him.


Justice offers Rex his hand to help him to his feet, which Rex refuses. He gets up on his own and then leaves the ring as Justice continues celebrating his win.
(C+)


-The cameraman seems lost in some dark corridor backstage as we join him. However it seems he knew where he was going after all as Enygma stops him and begins to speak.


Enygma: "Baine, are you still human or are you truly the Demon you claim to be? Would any human have it in them to burn an innocent woman? Did you think It would scare me off to witness your lack of humanity? Did you think I would run? Did you think I would give up? Did you not expect me to light a fire of hatred inside my soul aimed straight at you Demon?


The question of how for you will go is no question, but the question does remain of what will I do to you in retribution? I care not for what I have to put my body through as is physical pain not only temporary? Do you think you can defeat me Demon? Do you think I'll just give up my belt and let you have everything you want? Do you think a Championship and a fallen friend are not worth fighting for?


Will you realize that I will not give to my last breath?"
(B+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DemonBaine.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/USPW/USPWVS.pnghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/Enygma.jpg
-USPW World Championship Match- Baine vs. Enygma (c)-


Baine makes his way down to the ring first accompanied by his new manager Shane Sneer. Baine doesn't make it down though before Enygma assaults him on the entrance ramp. Baine tumbles down to the bottom as Enygma follows. He stomps away at the Demon. Enygma looks like he's going to take advantage of the bell not yet ringing as he looks under the ring for something. It looks like he found what he was looking for as he pulls a sledgehammer out from under the ring. He lifts it up to take a swing at Baine, who's trying to get to his feet when he looks up at the entranceway where the members of Sneer Corp. are making their way down to Enygma. He drops the sledgehammer and tosses Baine into the ring.


He follows him in and the bell rings to officially start this match. Enygma continues to stomp away at Baine, the normally emotionless Enygma showing a streak of anger. He then focuses his attacks on the ankle of the Demon trying to wear him down for the Enygma Variation (Scissored ankle lock). Once he feels Baine is worn out enough he locks in the Enygma Variation. He pulls on the ankle as if he's trying to snap it. Baine uses his hands to push himself up and crawls over to the ropes. He grabs onto the middle rope to get the break, but Enygma won't let go.


The Demon uses the ropes to pull himself back to one foot, Enygma still holding onto the other. Baine swings his foot into the bottom turnbuckle striking Enygma's back into it with enough force to get him to let go of the hold. The Demon limps over and grabs Enygma by the throat pulling him to his feet by it. He then raises him up by the throat dangling him there as the ref counts to 5. Baine drops him back down to his feet by 4 and then drapes him over his shoulders dropping him down with a Samoan Drop, all his weight landing on top of Enygma.


Baine takes control of the match from here and picks apart Enygma breaking his body piece by piece with a large variety of power moves. Sneer finally instructs him to put Enygma away. Baine raises him up by the throat and with both hands on it he lifts Enygma up and drills him down onto the canvas with a Hades Bomb. He makes the cover,

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2


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And Enygma gets his shoulder up at the last moment. Baine grabs him with both hands on the throat and pulls him back up looking for another Hades Bomb. He picks him up, but Enygma drives both feet into The Demons chest and repels himself backwards falling to the canvas and rolling away. Enygma charges at Baine and hits him with a thrust kick right on the chin, but the Demon looks like he barely felt a thing. He goes for another thrust kick with much the same result. Baine roars at Enygma daring him to try it once more. Enygma charges in once again and this time nails Baine with an Enygmagiri Kick (Standing Enziguri) which took the Demon off his feet. Enygma quickly went for the cover,


1

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2


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And Baine kicks out of it. Enygma actually looks surprised, but he doesn't waste time. He stomps on Baines ankle a few times and then flips him over locking in the Enygma Variation once more. Baine looks like he's hurt as he tries to drag Enygma with him over to the ropes. Sneer gets up on the apron and distracts the ref as Jumbo Jackson slides into the ring and stomps on the gut of Enygma getting him to release the hold. He then springs off the ropes and drops down onto Enygma with a Jumbo Splash. Jackson gets out of the ring and Sneer hops down off the apron.


Baine gets back to his feet and picks Enygma up by his mask. Baine prepares to deliver one more Hades Bomb to Enygma when Sheik Mustafa runs down to the ring . Mustafa tries to slide into the ring, but gets stuck as the ref tries to get rid of him. Baine drops Enygma and walks over to Mustafa. He shoves the ref out of the way and raises his foot to squash Mustafa under it, but he slides out just as the demons foot comes down. Baine turns his attention back into the ring as Enygma comes charging at him with an Engymagiri. He nails it and Baine goes down. He makes the pin,


1

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2



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.




.




3.


Winner: Enygma in 15:15
Rating (C+)


-Enygma is victorious over the Demon Baine with a little help from Sheik Mustafa. Enygma grabs his title and heads backstage without celebrating his victory in the ring. In the ring Baine gets back to his feet as he looks at Mustafa, the man who just cost him the World Championship. Mustafa gloats over Baines loss implying that he should've stayed with him. The gloating doesn't last long as Mustafa feels someone grab his shirt from behind. Sneer is back to his feet and throws Mustafa to the sharks.


Mustafa backs up away from Sneer and finds Baine staring down at him. Mustafa begs the Demon for forgiveness and prays for safety. It does him no good as Baine grabs his head and pulls it back grabbing his throat. He pulls him up by it and then drives him back down to the canvas with a chokeslam. Sneer joins Baine in the ring and gets in a few cheap kicks to the gut. Sneer tells Baine not to stop, to make sure people know what he can do to them. He then points at the entrance stage. Baine grabs Mustafa and tosses him out of the ring and drags him up the ramp by the cuff of his shirt choking him with it.


As they reach to stage Baine grabs Mustafa by the throat and walks him to the far left of the stage right to the very corner. Baine grabs Mustafa with both hands on his throat and lifts him up for the Hades Bomb. Baine tosses him full thrust 10 feet down off the stage and onto concrete floor below. Mustafa is sprawled out like a chalk outline as Sneer congratulates Baine, smiling at his destruction. EMT's rush to the scene to try to help Mustafa and the announcers speculate that his managing days may be over, possibly even his days of walking.
(C)


-Our cameras follow Enygma as he walks backstage. He seems to be walking the darker hallways of the arena back to wherever he's set up camp. A creepy environment this part of the arena is to say the least with lights flickering on and off constantly. Enygma walks down a dark corridor as the lights flicker on and off. He stops as he looks into a dark crevice. The cameraman looks in from behind Enygmas shoulder as he stares it down, the two white iris' staring straight back at him. The lights flicker on in the crevice for a moment showing the full form of the man. The dark mask with the design on the front leaves no doubt in Enygmas mind who the mysterious stranger staring at him is. The announcers believe they know as well, "Oh my god, is that... Acid?" "I believe it is."


He cuts his thumb slowly across his throat making sure Enygma sees the gesture as the lights flicker constantly. As they flicker off once more and as then back to life the piercing white eyes are no longer staring at Enygma, gone into the darkness.
(B)


Final Rating (C+)
Buy Rate (0.61)
-Was hoping for more from the main event.
-But I do have a new best match.
-Unfortunately it was just the dark match between Acid and Flash.


The Alzheimers Post Show Recap:

-Toa defeated Andre Jones (D)
-The People's Team defeated The Hotshots (D)
-Raven Robinson defeated Brazzles (C-)
-Nicky Champion defeated Peter Valentine to win the USPW National title (D+)
-Alicia Strong defeated Belle Bryden (B-)
-Bruce The Giant defeated Chris Caulfield (C-)
-Darryl Devine defeated Jim Force (C)
-James Justice defeated T-Rex (C-)
-Enygma defeated Baine (C+)

[Dragonmack]

(USPWs new best match ever, but you'll never know what it is Dark Match)

Unfortunately it was just the dark match between Acid and Flash

Yeah, the real problem with splitting everything up is contradicting yourself. :p

You say we will never know what it is, but then you spill the beans with an offhand comment. :eek:

But overall still very entertaining. Waiting on the Samoaphobia to crop up, but you got Brazzle talking like old school Bruce. Also shades of old school in the Divine-Hotshots dialogue, although without the previous trademark Devine Dream Dropping everyone involved. But I expect that will come later.

Great Job J-Silver, may your next post be before the month starts with a different number :rolleyes: :p

[Nightshadeex]

I love how Corporal Doom is Veteran Mentality. I think he'll fit the role better. Especially when he has a gimmick change.

[J Silver]

Yeah, the real problem with splitting everything up is contradicting yourself. :p

You say we will never know what it is, but then you spill the beans with an offhand comment. :eek:Yeah, that description was just to tease everyone. Once Acids existence was revealed it didn't really matter.
Waiting on the Samoaphobia to crop up, but you got Brazzle talking like old school Bruce.I take it you haven't watched any Scooby Doo in a while.
Great Job J-Silver, may your next post be before the month starts with a different number :rolleyes: :pThe next show is on Monday thank you very much. I would think keeping my deadline twice would earn me a little leeway.
I love how Corporal Doom is Veteran Mentality. I think he'll fit the role better. Especially when he has a gimmick change.Actually I fired him. I think I'll get to that in the next Stranton post.
<hr>

Frozen Dreams! Prediction Contest Results:

xopher316- 26 pt
Nightshadeex- 25pt
GruntMark- 25 pt
Dragonmack- 24 pt
Bigpapa42- 21 pt
Hyde Hill- 21 pt
Beeker- 19 pt
Eayragt- 19 pt
MaxxHexx- 18 pt
BYU 14- 16 pt


Congratulations to xopher316 for winning the FD! contest. Also congratulations to Nightshadeex for not coming in dead last.


January Predictions Results:

Dragonmack- 77 pt
xopher316- 77 pt
BYU 14- 74 pt
Nightshadeex- 58 pt
Bigpapa42- 57 pt
MaxxHexx- 54 pt
GruntMark- 50 pt
Jammy Dodger- 27 pt
Angeldelayette- 24 pt
1PWfan- 24 pt
SeanMcFly- 24 pt
Hyde Hill- 21 pt
Beeker- 19 pt
Eayragt- 19 pt
Astil- 18 pt
mistaken- 15 pt
James Casey- 10 pt
ChrisKid- 6 pt
tristam- 6 pt


And so we have a tie, winners for this month are Dragonmack and xopher316. As this is the first month I'm trying prizes the top 3 will all win something. PMs will be sent shortly.
<hr>
Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling:

-USPW TV Championship Match- Davey Wayne vs. Toa (c)
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bulldozer Brandon Smith vs. Biff Oakes
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bradford Peverelli vs. Hugh De Aske
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Mainstream Hernandez vs. Tim Westybrook
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Antonio Maxi Marquez vs. Harrison Hash
-Non-title Match- Nicky Champion vs. Darryl Devine

3 points for correct winner
1 point for correct match rating

Show will be up on Monday. I mean it.

[Nightshadeex]

I don't know why I didn't guess the match grades. Oh well, I never get those right anyway. But WOOHOO! I almost got in the top three with my heroic effort at Frozen Dreams. Alright, moving on...

-USPW TV Championship Match- Davey Wayne vs. Toa (c) (D-)
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bulldozer Brandon Smith vs. Biff Oakes - D
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bradford Peverelli vs. Hugh De Aske - D+
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Mainstream Hernandez vs. Tim Westybrook - D-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Antonio Maxi Marquez vs. Harrison Hash - D
-Non-title Match- Nicky Champion vs. Darryl Devine - C

[MrOnu]

The Hotshots never cease to amaze me ! Sure Devine is a great straight man for this duo, but you know, he's devine, so it's kinda expected.

[Dragonmack]

USPW TV Championship Match- Davey Wayne vs. Toa (c) C-

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bulldozer Brandon Smith vs. Biff Oakes D-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bradford Peverelli vs. Hugh De Aske D
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Mainstream Hernandez vs. Tim Westybrook C-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Antonio Maxi Marquez vs. Harrison Hash C+
-Non-title Match- Nicky Champion vs. Darryl Devine C+

[Bigpapa42]

USPW TV Championship Match- Davey Wayne vs. Toa (c)

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bulldozer Brandon Smith vs. Biff Oakes
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bradford Peverelli vs. Hugh De Aske
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Mainstream Hernandez vs. Tim Westybrook
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Antonio Maxi Marquez vs. Harrison Hash
-Non-title Match- Nicky Champion vs. Darryl Devine

[Candyman]

-USPW TV Championship Match- Davey Wayne vs. Toa (c) C+
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bulldozer Brandon Smith vs. Biff Oakes D-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bradford Peverelli vs. Hugh De Aske D
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Mainstream Hernandez vs. Tim Westybrook D-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Antonio Maxi Marquez vs. Harrison Hash D
-Non-title Match- Nicky Champion vs. Darryl Devine C

[xopher316]

-USPW TV Championship Match- Davey Wayne vs. Toa (c) (C-)
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bulldozer Brandon Smith vs. Biff Oakes (D-)
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bradford Peverelli vs. Hugh De Aske (D-)
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Mainstream Hernandez vs. Tim Westybrook (D)
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Antonio Maxi Marquez vs. Harrison Hash (C-)
-Non-title Match- Nicky Champion vs. Darryl Devine (B-)

[Hyde Hill]

-USPW TV Championship Match- Davey Wayne vs. Toa (c) C-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bulldozer Brandon Smith vs. Biff Oakes E+
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bradford Peverelli vs. Hugh De Aske D-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Mainstream Hernandez vs. Tim Westybrook D+
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Antonio Maxi Marquez vs. Harrison Hash C-
-Non-title Match- Nicky Champion vs. Darryl Devine C-

[Beeker]

-USPW TV Championship Match- Davey Wayne vs. Toa (c)
- J has a man-crush on Samoans~! (D+)

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bulldozer Brandon Smith vs. Biff Oakes
- J has a man-crush on Oak Trees~! (D++)

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bradford Peverelli vs. Hugh De Aske
- J has an addiction to Belgian chocolate~! (D+-+)

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Mainstream Hernandez vs. Tim Westybrook
- J has an addiction to hair products~! (D++-)

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Antonio Maxi Marquez vs. Harrison Hash
- J loves his AM(M) talk radio~! (D+--)

-Non-title Match- Nicky Champion vs. Darryl Devine
- J is no longer devout~! (D+++!)

Overall Show: C- :D

[J Silver]

OOC: All three of the prediction contest winners have claimed their prizes. As such, next weeks show will contain Dragonmacks Honest Frank in the 2nd half of the New Legends Qualifiers while coming soon to D-Macks dynasty is a staple of my USPW. Also coming soon to a merchandise table near you, the first Brazzles T-shirt.
<hr>
USPW: Where them women-folk turn out to be the real stars of the show.

Ruh-roh, on with the show.
<hr>

http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/68AW.png
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USPW American Wrestling
Tuesday, Week 1, February 2010
Held at The Missouri State Armory
Att. 3,372


Dark Matches


-In a match that had an average crowd reaction and some decent in-ring action, Des Davids defeated Andre Jones in 8:28 by pinfall with a Quarterback Sack. (D)

-In a bout that had a good crowd and good action, James Justice defeated Steve Flash in 7:54 by pinfall with a Liberation Slam. (C+)


Main Show


-We kick off tonight's show with a display of some slightly less cheap fireworks than last month. The announcers recap the events of Frozen Dreams!, highlights of which were Nicky Champion's National Championship win, Commissioner Doom's firing, Enygma retaining the World Championship, Baine nearly killing his former manager Mustafa and Enygma's run-in with Acid. Sam Strong gets up from the announcers booth and grabs a mic on his way into the ring.


Strong: "Well brothers, you're in store for a historical night tonight." The crowd cheer wildly. "Now as most of you know last night I had no choice but to relieve Corporal Doom of his title of commissioner after his actions through the last months and his questionable mental health. So tonight I'm wasting no time in introducing you to USPW's new Commissioner, someone I know will do the job well, have a respect for the position, the show, and the wrestlers, and most importantly make me proud. I introduce you all to USPW's new commissioner, PJ Strong."


PJ, the 18-year old son of Sam Strong makes his way out to the ring seemingly overwhelmed by the response he's getting from the crowd. He gets into the ring with his dad and the two hug before Sam hands PJ the mic and heads out of the ring and back to the announce booth. PJ grins happily as the crowd continue to cheer him on.


PJ: "Thank you, dad. I guess I should introduce myself. My name is PJ Strong, and I'm USPW's new commissioner. I know how my predecessor did this job and I know he did a fine job, but it's not how I'm going to go about this job. With the permission of Sam Strong this company will be headed in a new direction starting tonight. USPW has always been about an old school approach to wrestling and that worked fine, back in the 80's. USPW has always had that old school mentality which left it stuck in the past, never able to really compete with the big dogs.


USPW will now be about the very best wrestlers in the world competing in the very best matches for the fans in the arena and at home. USPW is now looking to the future, not to the legends of yesteryear but to the legends of tomorrow who can create their legacy here. That's why as my first act of commissioner USPW's next Pay Per View, A Legend In The Making I'm introducing the first ever New Legends Tournament. This tournament will pit 16 wrestlers who've never been on USPW programming before and have them competing against on another for the ultimate prize. The final four wrestlers will all win a guaranteed contract with USPW, but anyone who impresses may still find themselves signed to a contract.


The big prize these 16 wrestlers will be competing for however is a guaranteed shot at the USPW World Championship at anytime they want between now and next years A Legend In The Making. Competing in the tournament tonight will be Bulldozer Brandon Smith, Biff Oakes, Bradford Peverelli, Hugh De Aske, Mainstream Hernandez, Tim Westybrook, Harrison Hash, Antonio Maxi Marquez and competing in next weeks qualifiers will be Samuel Ford, Honest Frank, Matt and Greg Gauge, Steven Parker, Chance Fortune, Pox and finally, Acid. One of these sixteen will win a guaranteed shot at the USPW World Championship.


Under my USPW everyone will be equal, under my USPW things will be done fairly and under my USPW everyone will get their fair shake."


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PJ is about to go on when he's cut off by the theme of Darryl Devine. Devine walks out onto the stage with a mic in hand.


DD: "A fair shake, huh?"
PJ: "That's what I said Devine."


DD: "So, if I'm getting this right that means that everyone will get their chance at the Championship. See, I've been here 7 years now, you weren't even at puberty yet when I signed with this company. I've been here for 7 years without a single World Championship match. Now I've been nothing but loyal to this company, I am exclusive to this company. I'm a company man above all else. I've shown loyalty to this company, but where's this companies loyalty to me? Where's my shot? Are you telling me that you're going to sign up a bunch of nobodies, have them wrestle each other and then when the rest of the losers are gone, one of them gets a title shot? Not even a month in this company and they get a shot at the title, but I don't?! How the hell can you call that fair Strong?! How is that fair?!


Seven years and I get nothing, but one month and they have the company handed to them on a silver platter?!"


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Devine is about to continue his tirade on Strong when Nicky Champion makes his way out onto the stage next to Devine.


Champion: "Blame others Devine, it's what you do best. Did you ever think of earning something for once in your life? maybe work for it?"
DD: "You? You're going to try to tell me to work for something golden boy? Oh, the irony. You haven't worked for a damn thing Champion, the most work you've ever done is kissing Sam Strong's ass every night until he got you a haircut and a title shot. You had everything handed to you by the boss, every match, every failed title shot, every shred of talent, every little blonde you took to bed, you never earned any of it."

Champion: "I earned every bit of it Devine, I worked hard to impress Sam Strong, I worked to get him to notice me and to train me."
DD: "Yes, Mr. Strong that's brilliant. How do you like your coffee Mr. Strong? You don't look a day over 55 Mr. Strong. No, your kids aren't useless failures Mr. Strong." He says mocking Champion.


Champion: "If you know what's good for you Devine you won't say another word. You'll just turn and leave, maybe learn what it means to work hard and earn something."
DD: "Oh Nicky boy, you almost had me there until you used the word earn. Now I can't let you go on thinking you actually earned anything, can I golden boy?"


Champion and Devine just stand nose to nose now egging the other one on.


PJ: "Enough! If you two have problems you'll work them out in a wrestling ring and you'll do it tonight."


Devine slowly pulls away from Champion with a devious grin on his face. Then he quickly lunges forward raising his fist to try to scare Champion, but he doesn't flinch.
(C+)


[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Maxmillion Productions: Available for all your spying, espionage and birthday needs. We promise nothing!


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/BulldozerBrandonSmith_alt7.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/BiffOakes.jpg
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bulldozer Brandon Smith vs. Biff Oakes-


And here we have our first match in the New Legends Tournament, and boy are we off on the wrong foot. Biff had no clue what he was doing in the ring and Dozer ain't exactly a miracle worker yet. Dozer dominated Oakes through the match and put him away with a Dozer Driver (Backdrop Driver) before the crowd started wanting refunds.

Winner: Dozer in 4:56
Rating (E)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/BradfordPeverell.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/HughDeAske_alt.jpg
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Bradford Peverelli vs. Hugh De Aske-


Well, better than the last match anyways. This match was a bit more even, though the pirate was able to put the director away in a matter of minutes with a Cut-throat Driver.

Winner: Hugh De Aske in 5:27
Rating (D)


-We go backstage now to the Divinity locker room. Devine is pacing around in circles mumbling to himself about Champion's hypocrisy and what's going to happen when he gets him in a ring tonight.


Wayne: "You a little worried about the boss?"
Vessey: "Nope."
Wayne: "No?"
Vessey: "No. See, when he's yelling at someone who's not here he's not yelling at us."
Wayne: "Good point. How else can egg him on about Champion?"
Vessey: "Ooo, I know."


Vessey walks up to Devine, "Hey boss, I heard Champion says your breath smells rank." "Get lost you little pest." Devine responds.


Wayne: "Nicely done."
Vessey: "Shut up. At least I tried to piss him off."


The Hotshots continue on with their conversation while Devine mutters to himself still. Then the locker room door opens. In walks Belle Bryden with Brazzles alongside her. Divinity all look at Bryden.


Vessey: "Ever hear of knocking? What if I wasn't decent?"
Bryden: "You aren't decent."
Vessey: "I meant clothing-wise. I mean you would see me naked and jump all over me."
Bryden: "I doubt that."
Vessey: "Could be fun."
Bryden: "Not for me."


DD: "Shut up you little pest. Belle, surprisingly I was hoping I would see you tonight."
Bryden: "To thank me?"
DD: "No, to tell you to stay out of my business."
Bryden: "That's not going to happen Darryl. See, I think a partnership between us would be mutually beneficial. You need winners on your team and I am a winner. Together we could dominate USPW."


DD: "I've got all the help I need."


Vessey: "She totally wants me."
Wayne: "Does not."
Vessey: "Does too."
Wayne: "Does not."
Vessey: "She totally does."
Wayne: "Totally doesn't."


Bryden: "Them? Really?"
DD: "They're loyal to me. They're too stupid to make it on their own and they know it. You on the other hand are in it for yourself, you don't want a group, you want hitmen. Divinity doesn't have room for you and your ego."
Bryden: "Fine, I don't like playing second fiddle. Is that really so bad?"
Vessey: "We want her to join us."
Wayne: "Yeah, let her in boss."
DD: "Why don't you two shut up and let me deal with this?"


Wayne: "I say we vote on it."
DD: "Fine, you want a vote, you got it."

"Everyone for Bryden joining Divinity?" Wayne and Vessey both raise their hands. "Everyone against?" Devine raises his hand.


Vessey: "Ha! 2 to 1, she's in."
DD: "Wrong, 3 to 2. She's still not in."
Vessey: "3 to 2?"
DD: "My vote counts triple, remember?"
Wayne: "Oh right. Why did we agree to that again?"
Vessey: " 'Agree or I punch you in the face'?"
Wayne: "Yeah, now I remember."


DD: "Now get lost Belle."
Bryden: "I want to take down the whole Strong clan just as much as you Devine. I can help you do that. You think Champion won't have Alicia by his side? Who'll you have by yours? These two morons?"
DD: "... You have a month. Impress me or you're out."
(C-)


[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Joss Thompson, Attorney at law. Are you a young wrestler who's been cripplingly injured by Big Smack Scott? Then you may be eligible for a class action lawsuit.


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/MainstreamHernandez.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/TimWestybrook.jpg
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Mainstream Hernandez vs. Tim Westybrook-


Alright, now we have a match. 'The Ironman' Tim Westybrook used his strength to wear down the smaller Hernandez, but Mainstreams speed kept him just out of reach. Westybrook tired from all the chasing and when he was worn down enough Hernandez hit the Apparition #14 (Shooting Star Press) to advance in the tournament.

Winner: Mainstream Hernandez in 8:31
Rating (C-)


-The Hotshots, Vessey and Wayne make their way down the halls, Wayne preparing for his match later tonight.


Vessey: "You got this."
Wayne: "I got this!"
Vessey: "You're going to beat Toa."
Wayne: "Damn right!"
Vessey: "You're going to win that TV title."
Wayne: "For sure!"
Vessey: "And we're going to make the boss proud."
Wayne: "We can hope!"


Vessey: "Well, he did just say to start winning."
Wayne: "He probably meant consistently though."


"Of course he meant consistently morons." says Belle Bryden as they pass by her in the hall.


Vessey: "It's like the boss is yelling at us but in the voice of a sexy female. I think I can deal."
Bryden: "Maybe you could try winning instead."
Vessey: "Maybe you could try stripping. Wink, wink."


Brazzles growls at Vessey, Vessey jumping back when he hears it.


Bryden: "Good moron."
Vessey: "What the hell is that?"
Bryden: "That'd be my dog."
Vessey: "... Say what?"
Bryden: "I fed her and now she won't stop following me around."


Vessey: "See, when you feed a stray it follows you around. This is exactly why I'm not kind."
Wayne: "So nice of you to narrow it down to one reason."
Vessey: "Oh, there's plenty more reasons."


Brazzles growls at Vessey again.


Vessey: "We should get going, you have a match and a title to win."
Wayne: "You afraid of her?"
Vessey: "Let's just say my Uncle Bryan's Zombie-wielers made me dislike dogs very much."
(D+)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/ChampagneLover.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/HarrisonHash_alt.jpg
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Antonio Maxi Marquez vs. Harrison Hash-


And another good match out of this tournament. This match was a back and forth affair as both men tried to out-wrestle each other. In the end though it was Marquez who was able to put Hash away with a Champagne Sunrise (Frog Splash) and advance in the tourney.

Winner: AMM in 10:15
Rating (C-)


-Marquez celebrates his win in the ring and asks for a mic.


AMM: "My name is Antonio Maxi Marquez, and have I come here to USPW in search of new competition. Tonight my wish has been fulfilled as I have found it. I look forward to competing with whoever I may on my way to victory in this tournament. Once I am victorious I will be coming for the World Championship Enygma and it will be an honor to wrestle you for it. May the best man be victorious."
(D+)


[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: The Samoaphobia Awareness Program. It's a real concern and it's affecting 1 out of every trillion people. Someone you know may very well have Samoaphobia. Donate today, spread the word, not the disease.


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DavisWayneNewton_alt2.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/SamoanMachine.jpg
-USPW Television Championship Match- Davey Wayne vs. Toa (c)-


A surprisingly good match here, as neither guy is very popular yet, but the crowd were into it by the end. Wayne gave it everything he had right out of the gate while Toa took it and waited for his opening and took it when he found it. With a barrage of strikes and suplexes Toa caught Wayne. He locked the Unbreakable Sleeper on Wayne and had him tapping within seconds.

Winner: Toa in 7:14
Rating (C)


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/JoanneRodriguez_alt2.jpg vs. http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/BelleBryden_alt5.jpg
-Joanne Rodriguez vs. Belle Bryden-


And in our 'It's only here because almost everything else will probably suck' match of the night we have a tie for the best match of all my time here. The match was mainly a showcase for Bryden as she dominated J-Ro throughout most of it. Rodriguez was able to fight back, but it didn't last long. Bryden finished her off with a Dish of the Day (roundhouse to the back of the head) to pick up the win.

Winner: Belle Bryden in 6:48
Rating (B-) (!!!)


-Backstage in the interview area (Mostly rebuilt with a bit of elbow grease and a ****load of duct tape) Shane Sneer and Baine are interviewed by Seduction.


Seduction: "Last night Baine was unable to win the World Championship."
Sneer: "Unable is quite the statement dear. Baine was cost the title by that contemptible ass, Sheik Mustafa."
Seduction: "Speaking of whom, was-"
Sneer: "Made to pay. Mustafa got what he deserved for what he did to Baine. He cost Baine something precious, the World Championship and Baine cost him something dear, his health."
Seduction: "How can you even justify that?"


Sneer: "Simple, it's just good business. Get rid of Mustafa now so he won't ruin business later."


"You nearly killed him!" Shouts out T-Rex, Mustafa's other client, as he runs over to them. Rex charges at Baine who turns around and catches him by the throat. Baine chokes him with his hand around his throat then takes a step toward the wall and effortlessly slams him right through it. Rex's feet hang out of the hole just created by his body as he lay unconscious.


Sneer: "Let's go Baine, before more c0ckroaches crawl out."


Baine and Sneer leave as Seduction checks on Rex. As the camera looks into the hole we see whose locker room Baine just punched a hole in. James Justice gets off his couch and looks down at T-Rex.

Justice: "Dude..."
(C+)


[Commercial Break]

USPW American Wrestling: Brought to you by: Jim Force Merchandise. It still sells better than him.


http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/NickyChampionUSPW.jpghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/USPW/USPWVS.pnghttp://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t206/Jsilver532/DevineUSPW.jpg
-Nicky Champion vs. Darryl Devine-


Yay, Champion and Devine are already delivering main event level performances!


Belle Bryden and Alicia Strong were on the outside during this match, Strong supporting Champion and Bryden showing Devine she's a team player and not as useless as The Hotshots (as hard as that may not be). Devine went at Champion with a viscous series of punches right at the bell. He had Champion on the ground and began stomping away at him. Champion rolled out of the ring to catch his breath. As Devine taunts him on in the ring Champion reaches into the ring and grabs Devine by the ankle. He drags him out of the ring and stomps on him now. Champion rolls back into the ring as Devine makes his way back to his feet . Champion taunts Devine on from inside the ring in a reverse of fortune.


Devine gets back in the ring and squares off with Champion again. The two lunge at each other, but this time Champion is ready as he slugs away at Devine as well. Champion gets the better of Devine and takes control of the match. He wears Devine down with a series of power moves mostly associated with Sam Strong. Champion perches himself on the middle rope and calls for the end of this match. Devine gets back up to his feet and Champion jumps off the rope for the Hawkeye Hammer (middle turnbuckle Hammer Drop). Devine rushes at Champion and ducks down as he drives his fist into Nicky's gut.


Champion crawls back up clenching at his gut. When he's halfway there Devine strikes from behind pulling Champion up only to drop him face first into the mat with a Devine Dream Drop (RKO/Cutter). Devine makes the cover,

1

.
.
.


2


.


.



.



THR--- No! Champion has his foot on the bottom rope! (You all thought I was going to have Devine win there, didn't you? For shame.) Devine thinks he's won the match as he celebrates. The ref tries to tell him he hasn't won yet, but Devine isn't hearing it. He then looks to Bryden whose unenthusiastic face has him puzzled. She then points behind him. Devine turns around as Champion charges in with a Strong Arm Tactic that takes Devine down. Bryden sighs and then hops up onto the apron as Champion is about to pin Devine. The ref is distracted by Bryden and soon he's distracted by Strong pulling at Bryden's hair. The two women go at each other on the outside as the ref gets out and tries to break it up.


Inside the ring Champion watches on. He's about to go break up the catfight on the outside when he's caught from behind with a low blow by Devine. Devine makes his way back to his feet and stomps away at Champion while the ref finally separates the two women on the outside. Devine continues working over Champion inside the ring trying to soften his neck up for another Devine Dream Drop. Devine finally goes for it, but Champion pushes him off. Devine jumps off the ropes with a Devine Intervention (Springboard back elbow), but Champion nails him with a forearm to the back. Devine goes down and writhes in pain for a moment before getting back to his feet. Champion takes him down with a strong punch and Devine falls. He gets up again to get another strong punch and once more, this time Champion picks him up and drops him over his knee with a backbreaker.


Champion climbs onto the middle rope again and waits for Devine to get up. Once Devine is up he tries to leap off with the Hawkeye Hammer, but something has his foot, something named Belle Bryden. Bryden pulls at Champions foot holding him in place until Alicia pulls her off. Devine runs into the corner and nails Champion with a forearm. Devine then grabs Champion by the head and looks like he's about to try for a Devine Dream Drop from that position. Devine pulls away from the corner, But Champion holds onto the ropes. Devine tries to hit Champion with another forearm, but Champion kicks Devine away. He charges in again, but gets hit with the Hawkeye Hammer. Champion makes the pin,


1

.
.
.


2

.


.


.


3.

Winner: Nicky Champion in 14:33
Rating (C+)


-Champion celebrates his victory over Devine, but the celebration doesn't last long. Champion is attacked from behind, but not by Divinity. From out of the crowd Bruce the Giant gets in the ring behind Champion. He grabs Champion, his enormous hand on Champion's shoulder and spins him around. He throttles Champion now wrapping his enormous hand around his throat. He waits for Devine to get back to his feet as well, but Bryden drags him out of the ring before he stands up. Bruce focuses on just Champion as he lifts him up and slams him down into the canvas with a Giant Chokeslam.


Alicia reaches into the ring and tries to pull Champion out, but The Giant plants his foot onto Champions chest pinning him down there. Bruce bends down and grabs Strong by the wrist and pulls her trying to get her into the ring now. Alicia can barely fight against Bruces pull and is dragged into the ring after Bryden pushes her in. Bruce grabs her by the throat now, Bryden looking on in an almost giddy anticipation.


Then the lights go out. On the tron appears Enygma's signature question mark. Bruce tosses Strong away and takes his foot off Champions chest as he faces the entranceway to wait for Enygma. Then, nothing. The music stops and the question mark on the tron disappears. Bruce scans the area to look for Enygma. He then notices Strong and Champion are gone. Opposite the entranceway Bruce looks and sees Strong carrying Champion as they leave through the crowd. Enygma stands at the guard rail and raises his title up high for Bruce to see as he taps on his skull, pointing out he's smarter than The Giant. Bruce stares down the champion, gesturing at his waist and how it'll have the belt around it soon.
(B)


Final Rating (C+)
Cable Rating (0.97)


The Alzheimers Post Show Recap:

-Bulldozer Brandon Smith defeated Biff Oakes (E)
-Hugh de Aske defeated Bradford Peverell (D)
-Mainstream Hernandez defeated Tim Westybrook (C-)
-Antonio Maxi Marquez defeated Harrison Hash (C-)
-Toa defeated Davey Wayne (C)
-Belle Bryden defeated Joanne Rodriguez (B-)
-Nicky Champion defeated Darryl Devine (C+)
Credit for the Bulldozer alt goes to jtlant, credit for the rest go to me. And for those who haven't, check out the C-Verse Re-render Thread (http://www.greydogsoftware.com/forum/showthread.php?t=132686)
<hr>
Current Card for USPW: A Legend In The Making!:

-USPW World Championship Match- Bruce The Giant vs. Enygma (c)
-New Legends Tournament Semi-Final Match #1
-New Legends Tournament Semi-Final Match #2
-New Legends Tournament Final

[J Silver]

Prediction Contest Results:

Beeker- 15 pt
Dragonmack- 15 pt
Hyde Hill- 13 pt
Candyman- 13 pt
Bigpapa42- 12 pt
xopher316- 10 pt
Nightshadeex- 9 pt

So, everyone but Beeker thought I was just going to god push Devine, huh? Winners this week are Beeker and Dragonmack.
<hr>
Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling:

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Matt Gauge vs. Steven Parker
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Greg Gauge vs. Pox
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Samuel Ford vs. Honest Frank
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Chance Fortune vs. Acid
-USPW TV Championship Match- Cameron Vessey vs. Toa (c)
-Enygma & Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant & Darryl Devine

3 points for correct winner
1 point for correct match rating

For clarification Pox is Hell Monkey, Samuel Ford is Sammy the Shark, and for the slower of you Matt Gauge is Matthew Keith. Show will be up on Monday. Hopefully I'll get a backstage segment up tomorrow.

[Dragonmack]

For clarification Pox is Hell Monkey

I see what you did there with that veiled tribute. ;)

New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Matt Gauge vs. Steven Parker C-

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Greg Gauge vs. Pox C-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Samuel Ford vs. Honest Frank D+

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Chance Fortune vs. Acid C+

-USPW TV Championship Match- Cameron Vessey vs. Toa (c) C-

-Enygma & Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant & Darryl Devine B-

[Beeker]

Official Preview for USPW American Wrestling:

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Matt Gauge vs. Steven Parker
The Future is finally now? D

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Greg Gauge vs. Pox
Because it's Pox. Not Hell Monkey to me. Which incidentally is the coolest tribute I've seen on any board. C-

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Samuel Ford vs. Honest Frank D
He wins. Honest! I think because he's a bit more over and I don't like Samuel Ford nearly as much as I like Sammy the Shark.

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Chance Fortune vs. Acid
Acid brings the awesome, Chance brings some overness left over from his time in the bigs. C

-USPW TV Championship Match- Cameron Vessey vs. Toa (c)
Youknowa it'll go to Samoa. Probably when Vessey pauses and tries to pry off the '100% gold' faceplate of the belt. D+

-Enygma & Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant & Darryl Devine
See, I think Devine will get a 'god push' but it made no sense to hotshot the title from Valentine to Champion to Devine. It would have really damaged Champion's reputation. So while I think Devine will get there, it won't be in under a month. Here though, he can pick up a win, continuing his feud with Nicky while Bruce steps up as the next challenger to Enygma's title. C+

[Candyman]

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Matt Gauge vs. Steven Parker C-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Greg Gauge vs. Pox C-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Samuel Ford vs. Honest Frank D
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Chance Fortune vs. Acid C
-USPW TV Championship Match- Cameron Vessey vs. Toa (c) C
-Enygma & Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant & Darryl Devine C+

[xopher316]

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Matt Gauge vs. Steven Parker (C)
One Gauge has to win. I hope it's this one.
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Greg Gauge vs. Pox (C-)
I see what you did there.
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Samuel Ford vs. Honest Frank (D)
I'm a Chevy man.
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Chance Fortune vs. Acid (C)
-USPW TV Championship Match- Cameron Vessey vs. Toa (c) (C-)
-Enygma & Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant & Darryl Devine (C+)

Fun fact: Jacob Stranton's middle name is Russo!

[Nightshadeex]

You threw me off by saying it was a non-title match.

-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Matt Gauge vs. Steven Parker - C
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Greg Gauge vs. Pox - C-
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Samuel Ford vs. Honest Frank - D
-New Legends Tournament Qualifier- Chance Fortune vs. Acid - C
-USPW TV Championship Match- Cameron Vessey vs. Toa (c) - C
-Enygma & Nicky Champion vs. Bruce The Giant & Darryl Devine - B-