DIW Violent Delight
Date: Friday, Week 2 of March 2016
Location: Fuster Hall, Eastern Australia
East Coast Panther & Rob Edwards vs House of Horrors (with the Guru of Gore)
The show opens directly into a match, with Australian Devil now a part of the Guru's group, even if still a pretty unwilling one. Him and ECP pull off some fast paced flashy moves to get the fans going, before the Guru orders for Satan's Spawn to be tagged in. The friction leads to a force tag and AusDev ends up arguing with the Guru at ringside while Spawn beats down ECP. After a desperation reversal, ECP tags Edwards in and the two bruisers deliver a bit of hard hitting action to fire up the DIW fans, before AusDev and ECP blind tag themselves in to pick up the pace for the finish as Devil hits the Tumbleweed Drop on his fellow high flyer for the pin. Winners: House of Horrors
The Bad Truckers make an entrance, accompanied once more by the woman that was on their corner during last week's main event match. The group enters the ring and the woman demands a microphone to speak.
Woman: "My name is Jane Tanaka and I have come here to represent the DIW Tag Team champions... You see, Big Rig and Diesel Dan here are men, grown working men who drive across the entire country to make a living when they're not in this ring destroying their opponents... So they need someone to represent them when they're out trucking. That someone is me"
Voice: "Who gives a damn?!"
With no music to announce their arrival, the Hired Guns are simply out with McMiller on the mic and Wez Dobberly glaring menacingly at the DIW Tag Team champions.
McMiller: "No one cares what your name is or why you're here, girl...These people came to see a fight and I'm here to make sure everyone pays their dues... Me and Wez here, we got something to prove to our boss and the best way to do it is to reclaim those tag team titles!"
The Bad Truckers almost leave the ring to attack and start a brawl, but Jane Tanaka holds them back.
Tanaka: "You want a title match, we're gonna make some money out of a title match... that's why it's not happening now, it's not happening tonight, it's not even happening next week... I'll arrange so it happens at DIW King of Kombat!"
Dumfrey Pinn's bloated face appears on the big screen.
Pinn: "I'm glad to see my staff so motivated... so driven... Angus and Wez set out to reclaim those tag titles, but right now, Vance Sturt and Mace Mueller are about to lay waste to none other than Samoan Demolition! Just so you know boys, I'll be watching... Don't let me down!"
The Guru of Gore comes out following Pinn's message, but isn't accompanied by any of his House of Horrors people. Instead, he takes a spot on the commentary table alongside Dean Hawkins and Big Jim Teasdale.
Hawkins: It seems we'll be joined for this next match by the Guru of Gore... What brings you here?
Guru: I have come here to provide my wisdom to you unenlightened ones and observe the Devil of Brisbane from up close.
BJT: So the Brisbane Devil is the next person you're looking to recruit, or is it both him and Malietoa?
Guru: The Ritual of Ravaging requires a great amount of spiritual and physical power to complete... My goal is to ensure it is carried out properly
Samoan Demolition vs Pinn Enterprises Ltd (with Lori)
As it has been established by this point, Sturt and Mueller are fighting to impress their boss and remain with Pinn Enterprises Ltd, a setup that not only adds drama to this bout but also pushes the two men to attack with an added sense of urgency to their offense. Samoan Demolition are absolutely relentless in their intensity, but Sturt puts the breaks with a big atomic drop on King Malietoa that seems to have him limping for the rest of the match. The opening allows Sturt and Mueller to grab chairs and introduce some hardcore elements to the match, though an unprotected chair shot to the head is no-sold by the Brisbane Devil, much to the Guru's excitement on commentary. Still, with Malietoa's mobility severely limited, the match plays out more like a handicap 2 on 1 before the Guru leaves the announcers' table to pull the chair out of Mueller's hands. Mueller takes out the Guru with a stunner, but that only sets him up for the Devil's Drop and the pin. Winners: Samoan Demolition
The Comedian & Mayhem Mulhoney vs The Barracudas
Following the Barracudas' attack during last week's opening segment, The Comedian teams up with fellow veteran Mayhem Mulhoney to punish Rourke and Case for their actions. There is little to no grappling throughout the match, instead the four men brawl all over the place and hit each other with anything they can get their hands on, until they get near a big crate near the entrance..
...out of which Hell's Jester pops out! Like a literal Jack-in-the-box, Jester shoots out of the box with a crowbar in hand, swinging wildly for the Comedian but instead hitting Rourke when the veteran instinctively ducks under! Mulhoney rushes in to slam Hell's Jester in the face with the DIW Hardcore title, leaving Comedian free to hit a groggy Rourke with the Running Powerslam for the pin! Winners: The Comedian & Mayhem Mulhoney
w Vaughan vs Blaze Maximum (with Miss Cerizabeth)
Main event time and after his over-his-head bragging last week, Blaze Maximum finds himself in a dangerous match against the vicious leader of the Barracudas. Vaughan's size and power advantage sees him dominate the match early, even getting a two count after a chokeslam, but Miss Cerizabeth is there to distract him and provide her man with a chance to rebound. As if that wasn't enough, Vaughan slaps the snot out of Miss Cerizabeth, firing up Blaze for an explosive comeback leading to a near fall following a big elbow drop off the turnbuckle. The two men almost collapse onto each other, spent and tired past the ten minute mark and after some back and forth grappling, Vaughan slips through to lock in the Choke Sleeper. With Miss Cerizabeth out after his shot and Blaze Maximum dead center in the middle of the ring, the hold is kept for almost a full minute but Blaze finally taps out just before the fourteenth minute of the match. Winner: Vaughan
As soon as the bell rings, Tombstone runs down to the ring and before Vaughan can release the Choke Sleeper, he drops behind him to lock in the Rear Naked Choke in a three man entanglement spot! Vaughan fights to get out of it and Tombstone eventually lets go, but only so he can beat down the out of breath leader of the Barracudas while his men are recovering after their match against the Comedian and Mulhoney. The show ends with Tombstone standing tall and the announcers commenting on this being payback for the Barracudas' attack during the start of last week's show.
DIW Violent Delight
Date: Friday, Week 3 of March 2016
Location: Fuster Hall, Eastern Australia
Big Jim Teasale's music hits the speakers, meaning he has something to say in public before he will assume his position on colour commentary. BJT: "Vaughan... Tombstone... I've had enough of this guerilla war! Come out here and we'll settle this the way it should be settled, in the ring!"
Tombstone comes out first, looking confident as he makes his way to the ring with the DIW Championship belt on his shoulder. Unafraid, he gets inside, hits all four corners to fire up the crowd and turns towards the curtain to see if Vaughan will show up.
Indeed, Vaughan's music (the same used by all members of the Barracuas, in fact) comes on and the group's leader makes his entrance, joining Tombstone and Big Jim Teasdale in the ring.
BJT: "Listen up, both of you. Let us not fool ourselves, or these fans, we all know where this is going... but before you two face off at King of Kombat, I'm gonna give you a chance to let off some steam in an actual match instead of having you mess up each other's matches... so next week, it'll be Vaughan and one member of the Barracudas against Tombstone and one partner of his choosing!"
The Barracudas vs House of Horrors (with the Guru of Gore)
This chaotic 3 vs 3 mess that tries to pass itself as a wrestling match is Blitz Simpson's return to action after being sidelined with injury and indeed Simpson leads the charge against the Guru's group with his offense, especially the big and powerful Satan's Spawn. Hell's Jester brings his usual potent mix of high flying and hardcore weapons brawling, whilst Australian Devil seems to be actually thrown off his usual pace by the Guru's yelling and commands from ringside. As if all of the above going on amidst stunt dives and weapons spots weren't enough..
...the Comedian decides to get involved too as he runs down to the ring and returns the favor from last week to Hell's Jester, blasting him with a crowbar to the back of the head, quite possibly using the exact same crowbar that Jestar tried to use on him last week! With HoH's strongest competitor out and Satan's Spawn caught up in a wild brawl against Case, it's Rourke and Simpson who close up on the already off-looking Australian Devil to take him out and finish the match. Winners: The Barracudas
Once the bell rings, Satan's Spawn realizes what happened and turns his attention towards the Comedian. The two men lock up in a wild brawl, with the Guru assisting his monster with a sneaky shot whenever he's able. Thanks to this slight advantage, as well as the rest of the Horrors eventually joining in, the Comedian ends up overwhelmed and with no one rushing out to assist him, he ends up getting beaten senseless. The segment ends in somewhat disturbing manner, as Hell's Jester puts the Comedian through a table (because that's his thing, after all) and the group carries the body of DIW's icon away.
Hawkins: What on earth was that? And where are they taking him?
BJT: I don't know Dean, but they certainly stole the spotlight from Simpson's return and victory!
Dumfrey Pinn comes out of the curtain, before he's joined by the Hired Guns and Lori. Pinn produces a microphone from inside his jacket and orders the crowd to shut up so he can talk. Pinn: "Alright boys, you two have some balls shoooting for those Tag Team titles but tonight... tonight you'll have to get past Samoan Demolition... I don't care what you've got to do to win tonight and I don't care what you've got to do to win at King of Kombat, I want those belts... no matter what!"
Samoan Demolition vs The Hired Guns (with Lori)
After facing another combination of Pinn's goons last week in Sturt and Mueller, Samoan Demolition return to action against the experienced pairing of Angus McMiller and Wez Dobberly. McMiller does a great job in being the cowardly heel who breaks up the pace of the match with his antics, garnering heat from the audience and eventually receiving a righteous beatdown from the savage Samoans, before a distraction from Lori allows Dobberly to hit them both with stereo low blows and put Malietoa in the Full Nelson for the submission. Winners: The Hired Guns
The Hired Guns' celebration is cut short by the presence of Jane Tanaka at the top of the entranceway. Tanaka: "Good job boys, real good... But don't you for a second think that it's gonna be as easy when you face my Bad Truckers next Sunday at King of Kombat!"
Hawkins: Wait, so this is happening?
BJT: You bet it is, Dean! Listen to these fans, they want to see the Hired Guns and the Bad Truckers go at it, so of course I made the match official!
DIW Hardcore Championship title match
Mayhem Mulhoney vs Milton Hittlespitz
If the entire show had a recurring theme of Big Jim Teasdale booking matches, this main event subverts that expectation as Mulhoney basically comes out and lays down the title in front of him as an open challenge; Milton Hittlespitz rushes out before anyone else can and we seem to have a match while Dean Hawkins and Big Jim Teasdale look and sound absolutely lost on the commentary desk. No strangers to each other, the two men have a crazy hardcore match for almost fifteen minutes, with the challenger trying to use his speed to avoid the bulky champion, attacking with a mix of weapon shots, high risk dives or several times a combination of both, such as when he hits Mulhoney with a suicide dive while holding a chair. Despite the full-on assault, Mulhoney isn't so easy to take down or knock out and after withstanding some big moves from his challenger, he manages to finally turn the match into a brawl where he has the clear advantage, eventually hitting Hittlespitz with a Cradle Powerslam for the pin. Winner: Mayhem Mulhoney
Miss Cerizabeth comes out with a mic in hand. Blaze Maximum isn't far behind her. Cerizabeth: "That title rightfully belongs around the waist of Blaze Maximum! I'm out here to tell you, Mayhem Mulhoney, and tell Big Jim Teasdale over there too... I want, nay, I demand a rematch so the gold can return to where it should be in the first place!"
Whoever booked that AEW Full Gear main event is probably a fan of this diary. Especially the spots involving broken glass were straight out of that Tombstone-Comedian Taipei Deathmatch.
It was …. ummm …. yeah it happened. I really wanted to like AEW but they are just doing lots of stuff I really kind of hate. That match could have been designed to lose them audience numbers because I'm telling you now anyone with kids is going to be turned off by that match. I'm fine with them being edgier than the WWE but they really don't seem to know where the line should be and that Lights Out match was so far over the line that a mainstream fed shouldn't cross it's not funny. What's worse it was between two guys who don't need to do that sort of stuff to get a reaction … where do you go from there? Deathmatches shouldn't be being done by their only two real Main Eventers (Jericho is too old to work a full schedule and Cody has never really carried a big show in a Main Event so he's only a borderline ME guy really and guys like the Bucks are not ME as solos only as a pair).
I get what alpha2117 is saying as that sort of match would normally be at the end of a feud where over a few matches the intensity and stakes got raised. Instead they went straight to 11. That said it was pretty great. Weirdly I did think of that DIW match and laughed about it, life imitating art