Simply Awesome Wrestling: Just for Fun [C-Verse 2016]

[DAVEFAN95]

SAW Simply Awesome TV
Friday, Week 3, January 2016
Lowe Ballroom (North West)
5,000 SELLOUT!
Simply Awesome Network
0.43 (323,800)

Turner: Hello, everybody, Jerome Turner on the call for the first ever SAW show, I'm joined by Shane Sneer and boy, do we have a show for you. However, first, our general manager is here to give you a welcome.

The show begins with Randall Hopkirk entering the arena. After a nice reaction from the crowd he gets a microphone.

Hopkirk: Hello everybody and welcome to Simply Awesome Wrestling. My name is Randall Hopkirk and I am the GM of SAW. It’s been quite a journey to get here but we finally are. I would like to thank everybody here for turning up for this landmark event. We have a great show for you here tonight and without further ado, we….

At this point, James Jolson walks out. Mic already in hand he acknowledges the crowd with a smile and a raised hand.

Jolson: Do not worry, I have arrived. There is no need to panic, for I, James Jolson have arrived to protect SAW from all the evil that lives here. No need to thank me, your adulation is enough.

Hopkirk: James, what are you doing out here?

Jolson: Isn’t it obvious, I am here to vanquish the evil, protect the masses and… and,,,

Hopkirk: Be a hero?

Jolson: Yeah, exactly.

Hopkirk: Right well, we don’t need anybody “vanquished” right now and you aren’t scheduled to fight here tonight so….

Jolson: You are just going to send me home? With all the evil lurking in the shadows?

Hopkirk: How about you stay around and go on patrol, any evil you find, you can “vanquish” it.

Jolson: Aha, I knew you needed me. I will patrol the building. Evil is quivering in it’s boot now, and it should, I’m coming for it.

Jolson leaves and Hopkirk rolls his eyes in the ring, before he puts the mic up to his mouth again.

Hopkirk: Alright, sorry about that. Anyway, that’s all I have to say, so sit back, relax and enjoy the show.

Rating: D





Peter Gold is backstage enjoying an adult beverage, he’s relaxing outside the arena, with nobody around him.



This is when Mark Smart comes up to him, jumping about in excitement, Gold stands up.

Smart: OHMYGOD! Peter Gold! Holy crap, I love you man. You’ve been and done everything in this business it’s an honour to meet you, do you remember when you won your first title? And did you know that you were the first man to jump ship from SWF to TCW and..

Gold: Did you know you have an extremely grating voice?

Smart: I’ve heard people say that before, but you, oh my god, your voice is so rugged and sitting here talking to you is such a dream, I can’t believe I’m going to face you in the ring tonight, it’s such an honour, did I say that already? Anyway, it’s worth saying twice and...

Gold: HEY! Stop talking. Do you even realise why I am out here, outside the arena, any ideas?

Smart: No not really, but like you are one of the very few people here to have been in….

Gold: It was because I wanted to be alone.

Smart: No kidding. I don’t like to be alone, too quiet. Do you know who the quietest wrestler ever was? I do, I bet you don’t, I’ll give you three guesses. I’ll give you a hint, it isn’t Dan Stone, but he’s up there, probably top three for sure but..

Gold: Okay, you have three seconds to leave or you won’t be able to make it to the ring tonight.

Smart stops talking and slinks away saddened. Gold walks back over to his chair and sits down. He just get comfortable when a voice off screen shouts “Your match is next Mr. Gold”. Gold grumbles clearly annoyed.

Gold: God dang it.

Rating: D



v
Mark Smart (E) v Peter Gold (D+)

Gold start the match with brutal fists of fury but Smart has it scouted, unsurprisingly, he’s been watching Gold for years. Smart is quick and Gold can’t keep up. He hits Gold with a flurry of strikes but they don’t much and a lariat later, Smart is turned inside out. From there, Smart can do nothing. He knows what’s coming but he just can’t stop it. Shoulder block. Spinebuster. Lone Star Drop (Powerbomb). Yeah, Smart isn’t kicking out of that and that ends the match before it barely began.

Winner: Peter Gold
Rating: D-

Turner: Well, that was tough to watch.
Sneer: Hey, Smart had it coming, not like he didn't know what Gold is capable of.

Backstage, Joe Willis is reading a comic book when Sid Stephens comes up to him.

Stephens: Hello there, Joe. What you got there.

Joe: Just a new comic book. I had some extra cash left over this month.

Stephens: That’s nice… So, I hear you are looking for a tag partner tonight.

Joe: Sure am, I have a match with some fellas I hung out with before, they’re pretty cool guy. Although, I can’t find a partner, so I might not get to face them, that makes me sad.

Stephens: Well, I’m free. I could be your partner.

Joe: You would do that?

Stephens: Sure, maybe if it goes well, we could become champions together someday.

Joe: WOW! You really think so?

Stephens: I can’t see why not.

Joe: Holy crapcakes, I’m so excited now. WAIT! Stay right there, I gotta go tell the guys our match is on.

Joe then runs off, happy to have made a friend, a sadistic smile comes over Sid’s face.

Rating: E+





In a different part of the arena, two men, one masked are sitting at a table playing a card game. The both have numerous cards in their hand.

Laine: Got any threes?

Draca: …

Laine: Go fish, got any tens?

Draca: …

Draca hands a card over to Jeff.

Laine: Thank you, what about sevens?

This is when Joe comes in to frame, he’s running so quickly he actually passes them out before coming back.

Joe: Guys, guys, sorry to butt in but I found a partner, our match is on. Oh, I’m so excited.

Jeff: Hey, well, Draca and I, we’re looking forward to it too.

Draca: …

Joe: Yeah, wow, Draca, you’re right. It will be a great match. I can’t wait, see you out there.

Joe smiles wide and walks away.

Draca: …

Laine: Go fish.. Wait, you never replied to my last one, got any sevens?

Draca shrugs and hands him a card.

Laine: Cheater.

Rating: D



&v&
Draca (E) & Jeff Laine (D) v Joe Willis (E+) & Sid Stephens (E)

Turner: Draca and Laine are the only two guys here who seem to be actual tag partners.
Sneer: Well, they certainly know each other, even if one of them doesn't talk.

Joe starts quickly on Laine firing punches in quick succession before he gets a waistlock takedown and tries to wear down the arms of Laine, that doesn’t go well as Laine’s strength pushes Joe away allowing Draca to come in. He starts with some flashy punches followed by a Nelson slam but a kip up by Joe followed by a snap DDT grounds both men. They each make the tag. Sid slithers into the ring, dodging the striking combination from Laine and throws quick accurate strikes in retaliation. Sid is too slippery to hit. Atomic Drop. Snake eyes, Sid is in control, but Laine comes back valiantly, connecting with a flying clothesline. Both men are down and they both get the tag. Joe runs in with reckless abandon getting him the upper hand but Draca is too strong for Joe to keep the momentum. Twisting neckbreaker by Draca and he’s setting up the finish but Joe is able to escape, running to his corner for the tag.. But Sid isn’t there. He’s still recovering, Joe turns right into a running big boot. Joe is out, Laine is in and a Death Spiral (Spinning Underhook Fallaway) and that seals it for Laine and Draca

Winner: Draca & Jeff Laine
Rating: D-

Joe is still down in the ring as Sid realises they have lost. Slithering into the ring, he measures Joe as Joe tries to get to his feet, grabbing every rope on his way up. Joe turns and the Solid Snake Stunner (Running knee Strike) connects flush. Staring down at Joe’s lifeless body, Sid smirks before picking up the helpless man and locking in the Viper Vice (Cobra Clutch) and ragdolling Joe from side to side.



Here comes Harry Allen, he’s seen enough as he rushes the ring. Sid sees him and drops to the canvas, slithering backwards out of the ring. Allen saves Joe from further harm, but the damage may already be done.

Rating: E+

Gregg: Hello everybody, I’m Dharma Gregg and here we have our first interview of the night. I have Harry Allen here who just saved Joe Willis from a terrible fate. Harry, I must commend you on your noble actions.

Allen: Well, Dharma, this is the truth. My past, it ain’t pretty. Ah’ve done things Ah regret and Ah’ve done even worse things that keep me awake at night. These are things ah’ve already done and ah can’t change that. However, what ah can do is change my future. Ah want to do good, Dharma and that’s what that was. Joe ain’t a bad guy and he don’t deserve the beating he got, Ah hope he’s okay but Ah should’ve done more. My ledger is dripping in red, Dharma and Ah I want to fix that.

???: What garbage…

Marc DuBois walks on screen. A smug smile on his face.

DuBois: You really are an idiot, aren’t you? People don’t change Harry. They lie and steal and do whatever they can to be at the top, that’s what you did, don’t feel guilt, own that. That is you, don’t be somebody that you aren’t. I’ve always been true to myself and look…

Allen: And look where that gotcha, disgraced and unemployed for over a year. You know nothing of my past, why would you even comment on it. It’s my past and Ah will deal with it, Ah don’t…

DuBois: At least I took that on the chin. I had to be fired, I own that. That’s me, you can take it or leave it, but you, you were just removed, not like you’ve been doing much over the last nine months either, huh, Harry?

Allen: Ah was let go because of the man Ah was, that’s changed now.

DuBois: You can tell your story of a reformed Harry Allen all you want, but when push comes to shove, I know you’ll show your true colours, like I always have. Don’t believe me, just wait til later tonight, the main event just got that much more interesting.

Rating: C





In the doldrums of the arena, Dharma Gregg has left Allen and DuBois and is walking over pipes and in the darkness. She looks scared as she’s clearly taken a wrong turn and is frightened by a large figure stands before her in the shadows.

Figure: LEAVE! You do not want to gaze upon this monster.

Gregg: Don’t need to ask me twice.

Gregg then turns to leave but Leon Brody is arrives.

Brody: Uh, Dharma, we had an interview. Where the hell were you?

Gregg: Oh, I’m sorry. The last two, they were…

Brody: If you have an interview scheduled with the World Dangerous Man, you don’t keep him waiting. You better not screw up again for my next interview.

The large figure in the shadows steps out, it’s Wolfsbane.

Wolfsbane: Dangerous man? How ordinary. I am not a man, but a wolf cursed to live my days as prey to the moon. You wouldn’t have a chance against me, for I am a beast, a terrifying beast who preys on humans if they dare to enter my territory, I can smell them when they come close. NOW GO! Before the full moon arrives and my deadly forms comes out to play.

Brody: Are you challenging me right now? Is that what he’s doing Dharma?

Dharma: I don’t know. Everywhere I turn there’s two men in a pissing contest to see who is superior.

Wolfsbane: You and I cannot battle. I do not want any more victims in my wake, you would be nothing but a game to me. I cannot allow…

Brody: SHUT UP! You wanna go? We’ll go. Next week and you better be ready.

Rating: D-





Escaping again, Dharma Gregg comes out of the door from the doldrums of the arena, but this time she is met by Jamie Atherton leaning against the wall, his glasses on.

Jamie: What up gurl? You from Tennessee? Because you is the only ten I see.

Gregg: I can’t get a break today can I?

Jaime: Cumere gurl, I got something for ya.

Gregg: Ugh, think I’m gonna be sick.

Jaime: Getting sick at the sight of my sexiness is normal, Gurl. It’ll pass.

Gregg begins to physically gag but James Jolson jumps out of nowhere.

Jolson: Unhand her, foul villain.

Jolson then jumps between them, but he inadvertently hits Gregg who falls onto the floor.

Gregg: Hey!

Due to the commotion, Randall Hopkirk comes over.

Hopkirk: What on Earth is going on?

Jamie: Nothing much boss, I was just talking Ms Gregg here, she’s been all over me all day and I was just asking her out so later I could take her home and…

Hopkirk: Whoa, I’ve heard enough. James, I found you somebody to vanquish. Now both of you, go.

Jolson looks happy and they both walk away and out to the ring.

Hopkirk: You okay Dharma?

Dharma: I…

Dharma quickly runs off.

Hopkirk: Oh… Well, might want to brush your teeth afterwards Dharma. Though if you didn’t that could keep Jamie away.

Hopkirk stands there wondering for moment.

Rating: D



v
James Jolson (E-) v Jamie Atherton (E)

Jolson starts with forearms to the face as he overpowers Jamie. Jamie does get some offense in as he uses speed and trickery to get away and hits a spinning heel kick. Unfortunately, the following high risk maneuver from Jamie does nothing as Jolson completely destroys him with unmatched power. Jamie slips out of the ring but gets distracted by an attractive woman in the front row. Jolson comes out and throws him in the ring, but Jamie is able to advantage with a slingblade. Jamie looks to climb to the top but again, the lady in the front row catches his eye, this is his undoing as Jolson attacks him from behind and quickly hits The Death Penalty (Running Powerslam) for the win.

Winner: James Jolson
Rating: E

v
Harry Allen (D+) v Marc DuBois (C)

The match begins and the ref turns from calling for the bell and DuBois superkicks the ref. Allen is shocked and rushes at DuBois landing with high intensity strikes. DuBois absorbs the blows with a sneaky grin, but Allen tries a sliced bread only for DuBois to throws him outside. A baseball slide, followed by flinging Allen into the barricade gives DuBois the upper hand. However, when they back in the ring, Allen hits a missile dropkick and DuBois is down, Allen tries to revive the ref and does so, getting a thank you from the ref, of course he has no idea what happened, but DuBois is back to life, Dubious DuBois Pin (Cheating Roll Up) and DuBois gets it.

Winner: Marc DuBois
Rating: C-

Turner: DuBois, god damn him. He stole it.
Sneer: He just proved his prophesy, Allen is just pretending.
Turner: We'll have to wait and see. That's it folks, we'll see you again next week, same time, same place.

Show Rating: C-

[DAVEFAN95]

Simply Awesome TV Predictions and Questions

Leon Brody v Wolfsbane

Jeff Laine v ???

Joe Willis v Marc DuBois

Peter Gold v ???

Who did you like/dislike in the first show?
Overall thoughts on the show? Format, writing, etc?

[neslo024]

Originally Posted by DAVEFAN95

Simply Awesome TV Predictions and Questions

Leon Brody v Wolfsbane

Jeff Laine v ??? wasn't sure if I should be picking the winner or who was gna be the opponent.

Joe Willis v Marc DuBois

Peter Gold v ??? Same as before wasn't sure what to pick. I think Molokai Milk would be great for this product so he could be one of the mystery guys.

Who did you like/dislike in the first show? I always love DuBois if he stays clean. Liked Johlson's over enthusiastic hero bit too.
Overall thoughts on the show? Format, writing, etc?

I liked the format and show overall. Maybe a little backstory on the company but that is more personal interest than neccessary.

[EBEZA]

I love this, love how everyone has a character! Hoping Joe Willis and James Jolson end up as a team: Willis with his comic books and Jolson as the real-life superhero!

[christmas_ape]

Leon Brody v Wolfsbane

Jeff Laine v ???

Joe Willis v Marc DuBois

Peter Gold v ???

I think it's definitely difficult to run with a comedic product which makes it more impressive I enjoyed the first show. Plenty of characters already I'm looking forward to seeing more of.

[DAVEFAN95]

SAW Simply Awesome TV
Friday, Week 4, January 2016
Gorski Ballroom (South West)
5,000 SELLOUT!
Simply Awesome Network
0.44 (331,600)

Turner: Back again, Hello everybody welcome to Simply Awesome TV. I am Jerome Turner, joined by Shane Sneer and we welcome you to our broadcast.

James Jolson is first out again, beginning the show, he stands and waves at the crowd before getting a microphone.

Jolson: Do not fear, James Jolson is here. A hero of magnificent proportions, here to keep you, the SAW faithful safe. I have not encountered much evil so far, I must be doing my job pretty well. However, I know of the evil that lurks in the shadows, I know it’s there and I will be ready when it strikes.

Wolfsbane then comes out, tentatively coming into the lights as he scours the heavens for the full moon, as he sees there is no moon in sight (we are inside after all) he begins to speak.

Wolfsbane: I know of who you speak large muscle man, it is I. The monstrous side of me comes when the moon is full and I have no control over what I do, I become animalistic, predatory, unstoppable. I cannot help it, it is a curse I must live with, but I am not here to hurt anybody, I do not want my condition to result in violence and I will hide myself away to male sure that doesn’t happen.

Jolson: Yes, I had heard that you were lurking in the shadows. I want to believe you, but I cannot. You might be tame in this form but I am sure, the werewolf in you, is a feral beast and for that I must take you out.

Wolfsbane: You do not want to attack. I don’t know what will come of me if I’m provoked…

Jolson: That’s a chance I have to take, you must be exterminated..

Jolson makes a move to leave the ring, but Leon Brody comes out. A scowl on his face, he stares at Jolson.

Brody: Whoa there, superhero. I get you are all about protecting this and saving that, but right now, you are doing the wrong thing and that is getting in the middle of my business. Last week, this idiotic puppy dog said he would face me this week. Get in line.

Jolson: But it is my duty to..

Brody: Duty? You have a duty alright, to shut your mouth and stay out of my way or become a victim of the world's most dangerous man.

Wolfsbane: Very well. I will face the brute as promised, but I will not be held responsible for my actions.

Brody: Excellent. Jolson get out of here.

Looking angry, Jolson leaves the ring, clearly annoyed.

Rating: E+





Backstage, Joe is watching a superhero movie. He’s got a bag of popcorn and is eating it, fully engrossed in the movie. This is when Sid Stephens walks up to him. Joe gets a fright, his bag of popcorn flies into the air as Joe goes into his fighting stance as the popcorn reigns down from the air.

Sid: Whoa, calm down. I just want to apologise Joe. What I did last week, wasn’t me. I shouldn’t have attacked you. I was upset we lost and I took it out on you, I hope you can forgive me.

Sid puts on his best puppy dog eyes that he can. Joe drops his fists.

Joe: Alright, apology accepted, everybody makes mistakes.

Sid: Thank you, Joe. You are truly kind. Put it there.

Sid extends a hand and Joe shakes it, smiling gleefully. Joe then walks away as Sid smirks with evil intentions.

Rating: E+



v
Leon Brody (D-) v Wolfsbane (E-)

Brody shouts at Wolfsbane that he wants the monster. Wolfsbane looks up and shouts back no full moon. Brody says try harder as Wolfsbane looks again and Brody then attacks him. He starts with strong, intentful strikes to Wolfsbane who is certainly no monster. That being said, he’s no slouch either. He pounces with an animalistic takedown and although Brody is able to counter it, it was an impressive display of athleticism. Brody then puts it into overdrive with dangerous spinning backfists, Wolfsbane dodges the first two impressively but the third connects. Brody sets up the Wicked Big Boot but again, Wolfsbane is able to get out of the way as Brody gets saddled on the top rope and Wolfsbane pounces again and both men spill to the outside. The ref begins the count as both men try to get back to their feet, they do and the ref is at six but they brawl on the outside and the ref reaches 10, counting out both men, the match is a draw.

Winner: Draw
Rating: E+

Turner: Wolfsbane struggles at times but he brought Brody to his limit
Sneer: He's no monster though, Brody is only dangerous man in SAW.

Backstage, Jeff and Draca are playing poker this week, not quite sure what there obsession is with card games.

Jeff: I’ll raise you two thousand.

Jeff pushes some chips into the centre as Draca thinks looking at his card.

Draca: …

Draca then pushes in some chips. Uh, presumably calling.

Jeff: You’re gonna regret that.

Both men turn over their cards and Jeff is shocked to see Draca has won. Draca pulls in all the chips to the chagrin of Jeff.

Draca: …

Jeff: Yeah, yeah yeah, you won, no need to gloat.

This is when a new guy comes in, Draca and Jeff look at him a bit confused.

???: 4w350m3, 1 l0v3 p0k3r. n4m35 l33 7r170n. h3h, y0u 6uy5 4r3 601n6 d0wn, 1 pl4y 7h15 0n 7h3 1n73rn37 7h3 wh0l3 71m3. y0u'r3 4b0u7 70 b3 pwn3d, l0lz0rz.

Jeff: Say what?

Draca: …

Jeff: Lee Triton? That’s his name? Wait, what? How can you understand him? And what the hell is leet?

Rating: D

Gregg: Hello everybody, Dharma Gregg back again with the interviews. I’m here with Quentin Queen, how are you doing Quentin?

Queen: Well, Dharma, my humour is valorous. Tis most wondrous to beest ere and I behold to mine own contest whenev'r yond may beseech me.

Gregg: I.. I got none of that, are you a thespian?

Queen: Nay, I…

At this moment, Jamie Atherton’s head pokes around a corner.

Jamie: Did I just here somebody say..

Gregg: Thespian, Jamie. THESPIAN!

Jamie: Oh..

Jamie leaves again disappointed.

Queen: That gent's a dram did bite of a creepeth.

Queen walks away.

Gregg: Yeah, there’s a lot of those around.

Rating: D-



v
Jeff Laine (D) v L33 7r170n (F+)

Sneer: Oh, our graphical guy clearly needs new lessons, there's numbers in that name
Turner: It's leet, Shane. Some kind of internet language. It spells out Lee Triton.
Sneer: I know, I heard what they said earlier.

L33 begins the match the better, throwing a handful of memes at Jeff to distract him. He then climbs through Jeff’s leg and kicks him in the groin, no DQ the ref missed it. He then stands near the ropes as Jeff charges at him before stepping aside and Jeff goes flying out of the ring, almost reminiscent of a rick roll. L33 laughs gleefully in the ring, but when Jeff comes back in the joke is over. L33 has no keyboard to hide behind. Jeff starts with a striking combination before landing a jumping faceplant. The flying clothesline hits next and Death Spiral (Spinning Underhook Fallaway) later, L33 is looking at the lights.

Winner: Jeff Laine
Rating: E+

Backstage, David Apollo is with a group of kids, he is playing the guitar for them.

Apollo: Okay, everybody gather round. Now, I hope everybody understands why they should be honest and respectful to everybody. Doing the right thing will make you feel good about ourselves and everybody wants that right.

All the kids nod.

Apollo: Okay, another song..

Apollo is just about to start when Marc DuBois makes his way into the room.

DuBois: Ugh, mini humans. Out of the way disgusting vermin, I just want to talk to David Apollo.

Apollo: Oh… Hi Marc. I was just telling the kids about honesty and..

DuBois: Yeah, you were lying to them. Don’t listen to this guy kids, cheating is the way to go, it’s much easier.

Apollo: No, no. Being good is what we all need to do. Okay, I think it’s time to play outside.

The kids leave with their parents as they go play outside.

Apollo: What are you doing, Marc? I’m doing my best to give back to the SAW community and you come in here talking about..

DuBois: Oh, stick it up your butt, Apollo. I know you didn’t just appear out of thin air, you didn’t get here by sticking to the rules and being a good guy, you cheated, but the question is how?

Apollo: I didn’t cheat. I worked hard, unlike you. You were handed everything and threw it away. I’m not going to squander my opportunity to make the world a better place.

DuBois: Sorry, I just don’t believe you. The goody two shoes act, the giving back. Personally, I think you feel guilty about something. However, I’m going to have to find out what by myself, can’t imagine you’ll tell me.

Apollo: Do your digging, I have no secrets.

This is when Harry Allen comes to the door.

Allen: Don’t waste your time David, Marc is just miserable and he just wants to spread that misery. I’d know, that was me once but I’ve changed, for the better, but him. I don’t think he can be changed.

DuBois: Oh boo hoo, look, I am here because you two are the biggest bunch of hypocrites this side of New England. I know that you haven’t changed and I know that you've cheated to get here and I’m just going to prove that it’s human nature to do so. Even the most reformed or pure of people will turn to insincere ways to achieve goals. I did and I’m famous now. So, now that that’s out in the atmosphere, I gotta go. Gotta beat up Harry’s good ol’ buddy.

Marc leaves with a smile on his face.

Rating: C-



v
Joe Willis (E) v Marc DuBois (C)

Joe starts remarkably well. He fires punches in quick succession before hitting a snap DDT before Marc bails to the outside. Joe follows only to be blindsided and slammed into the barricade and brought back into the ring. Marc eyes a superkick but it misses but he expertly turns it into a Marc of Excellence (rolling German Suplex) but cant get the three. Another superkick misses as Joe gets a waistlock takedown but Marc is crafty with a Dubious DuBois Pin (Cheating roll up) but that isn’t enough. Joe then springs up he’s fired up. Russian leg sweep, Marc is down. Joe signals for the Joe and Behold (Camel Clutch Cradle)...

But Sid Stephens runs down and pulls the leg. Joe lands on his face. Marc is up, Model Solution (Inverted Sleeper) and Joe goes to sleep, the bell rings but the two men go on the attack...

But Harry Allen rushes down and stops it.

Winner: Marc DuBois
Rating: C-

Peter Gold is backstage drinking a beer again when Haley Buck comes up to him.

Haley: Are you Peter Gold?

Gold: I really am in no mood to talk.

Haley: Listen then. I’ve been ordered by SAW management to be your manager.

Gold: What now?

Haley: Yeah, apparently, you’re very boring to the viewers.

Gold gets up.

Gold: Look here sweetheart, I dunno if you’ve noticed or not, but I don’t really get on well with people, so hop back on your horse and trot back to town, cause I don’t need you or anybody else, so get going.

Haley: That’s all well and good, but we don’t really have a choice. I need a job, your as boring as watching grass grow on a cloudy day and if you don’t do this, SAW management will fire you, which means less beer, so you don’t really got a choice.

Gold grumbles for a moment.

Gold: Fine, just sit down, be quiet and leave me be.

Haley does so, but just as Gold sits down again, he’s called for his match.

Gold: You gotta be kidding me.

Rating: D



vw/
David Apollo (D) v Peter Gold (D+) w/ Haley Buck

It’s a pretty even start to the match as Gold’s brutal fists of fury matches up with Apollo’s punches of godlike strength. It’s a lariat that gives Gold the chance to lead the match though but Apollo fires back with a spear. A second one misses and as Gold hits a spinebuster but only for two. Apollo fights back with punches of godlike strength before he is able to connect with an Alabama Slam, but it’s not enough. They trade blows as a Gold Lariat is returned by an Apollo spear.

Both men are down as a large masked man walks down to the ring and takes Haley Buck. This momentarily distracts Gold as he misses a Lariat, but Apollo doesn’t realise the distraction. He quickly hits a spear, followed by a superplex and then ends it with a Mythical Driver (Draping Reverse DDT) and that gives Apollo the huge win

Winner: David Apollo
Rating: D

Post match, Gold recovers quickly as he and Apollo are in the ring as the masked man drags Buck away, as she struggles to get free. He takes Buck up through the crowd and has a mic, his voice is distorted.

???: If you want her back Gold, you’ll have to come take her from me.

The man towers over Buck as she struggles, Gold seems uninterested, not caring about her but Apollo leaves the ring and goes after the masked man. However, before he reaches him, Buck elbows the masked man in the face and gets free, running past Apollo and back to Gold, she stands tall in the ring beside him as Gold looks on in shock as he says “whoa”.

Rating: C-

Sneer: Buck.. Buck just elbowed that guy in the face?
Turner: Haley Buck has made quite the impact here tonight,but that's all we have time for, but the question is, who tried to take Haley Buck?

Show Rating: D+

[DAVEFAN95]

Didn't really plan on this but I can have a reply to comments/talk about the data section here.

First off, there isn't really any history to SAW. Basically, Randall Hopkirk got a bunch of money and set up a company, a dev territory, a network and a dojo and spent the first two weeks getting a roster ready. Oh, and you always pick who you'll think will win, but you can guess who you think the ??? is in the comments if you wish.

Characters and tropes for those characters are certainly a centre focus for me in this diary. It took a week or two to come up with one for everybody but I'll admit I made a mistake in debuting L33 7r170n and Quentin Queen on the same show seems their tropes are similar, but have completely different characters.

Right now, comedy isn't exactly something I'm completely zoned in here, sure SAW is based heavily on that but I don't necessarily consider myself funny, so I more try to come up with entertaining interactions between characters then try and look for comedic skits, but if they come across as comedy, I'll take it.

Simply Awesome TV Predictions and Questions

L33 7r170n v Quentin Queen

Joe Willis v Mark Smart

Jamie Atherton v Peter Gold

David Apollo & Harry Allen v Marc DuBois & Sid Stephens

Who did you like of the newcomers on the last show?

[christmas_ape]

L33 7r170n v Quentin Queen

Joe Willis v Mark Smart

Jamie Atherton v Peter Gold

David Apollo & Harry Allen v Marc DuBois & Sid Stephens

I appreciated the Room reference! Only just looked and saw this show. Looking forward to seeing Wolfsbaine on a full moon

[DAVEFAN95]

SAW Simply Awesome TV
Friday, Week 1, February 2016
Lowe Ballroom (North West)
5,000 SELLOUT!
Simply Awesome Network
0.43 (325,000)

Turner: We're back and after how last week ended there's one question on everybody's mind, who the hell attacked Haley?
Sneer: Whoever it was, Peter Gold isn't going to care, I've known that man for a long time and women troubles is never something that bothers him.
Turner: Maybe not, but I can tell you one thing, Haley Buck can handle herself.

Backstage, Dharma Gregg finds Peter Gold sitting with a beer in hand, he clearly does not want to be annoyed but Gregg goes over to him anyway.

Gregg: Hi Peter, Is Haley okay? Where is she?

Peter: Can’t you ask her?

Gregg: Well, I don’t know where she is? I’m worried she..

Peter: Don’t worry about Haley, didn’t you see her last week? She can clearly take care of herself, which is good for me.

Gregg: You mean you don’t care about her?

Peter: I don’t have to. I mean, I’d prefer to be alone but having somebody like her around, well, it ain’t too bad. She can take care of herself, she’s independent, strong willed. I guess I got lucky.

Gregg: So you do care?

Peter: What? No. I’m just saying, she’s… it’s better than I expected it to be.

James Jolson, sporting a broken and bruised nose, then comes up. Gregg looks at him funny, a little confused as she seems to be thinking about something in her head.

Jolson: Do not worry, Mr. Gold. SAW’s resident hero, James Jolson is on the case. I will figure out who took your beloved.

Peter: Okay, first she’s not my beloved. Secondly, nobody took her, she’s in the bathroom. However, if you want to find out who tried to take her, knock yourself out. Just keep me out of it, but let me know when you find the guy, I’d like to have a.. Chat with him.

Gregg then turns to Jolson, looking suspiciously at him.

Gregg: Where did you get that broken nose?

Jolson: Oh, you know… Fighting evil here, protecting the innocent there. I, uh, gotta go.

Jolson walks away as Gregg looks at him, deep in thought.

Rating: D





Quentin Queen is backstage, he’s dressed in Shakespearian robes and seems to be rehearsing some lines. Lee Triton then comes in.

7r170n: H3y l053r, l0z0rz. Dr4m4 15 50 0ld 5ch00l. 637 w17h 7h3 pr06r4m y0u 1d107

Queen: How dareth thee grace me with such filth? Thee has't disgrac'd the English language, thee shalt payeth f'r this.

7r170n: Wh473v3r l053r. 1'm 601n6 70 5h0w y0u wh47 17 m34n5 70 b3 pwnd l473r 70n16h7. L0lz0rz.

Triton then leaves the room as Queen looks on.



Suddenly, Wolfsbane jumps out of the shadows, startling and grabbing Queen.

Wolfsbane: My word, I am saved. You.. you will have the answer I seek. The moon it haunts me, but you were once a monster and now you are man. I must ask how did you do it?

Queen: I'm s'rry, I doth not knoweth what thou art talking about.

Wolfsbane: The Phantom of the Opera. Only someone like him would speak in a manner such as this. You no longer have a hideous face, you got rid of the monster. I want to do the same thing.

Queen: Mine own apologies, but I am not a phantom of the op'ra, I am but a followeth'r of the theatre and a playeth'r on the stage.

Wolfsbane is disappointed as he slouches down, another dead end.



Leon Brody then comes out of nowhere, punching Wolfsbaen in the face, knocking him to the floor.

Brody: I thought wolves could smell danger coming.

Smirking, Brody walks off as Queen’s mouth is wide open, shocked by the proceedings that happened before him.

Rating: D



v
L33 7r170n (E-) v Quentin Queen (E+)

L33 starts nicely distracting Queen by throwing a handful of memes at him to take control but Queen dodges theatrically to L33’s follow up attacks. This however, allows L33 tim to slap Queen in the face, as L33 l0lz out loud. This is his undoing. A big right hand by Queen followed by an old school takedown and Queen roughs him up on the mat. When finally Queen hits the Q-Ball (Pancake Facebuster) and calls it a day.

Winner: Quentin Queen
Rating: E+

Sneer: My head hurts, why can't people just speak regular English these days.

Backstage, Harry Allen is drinking some water getting ready for his match. This is when Mark Smart comes up to him. Completely starstruck, Smart is silent and stands completely still for a moment as Allen looks at him, a little confused.

Allen: Oh, hi Mark.

Smart: Harry Allen….

Allen: That’s me.

Smart: Three time All Action, two time Cruiserweight, four time Cruiserweight tag team and on World tag team champion…. Wow. It’s.. It’s an honor.

Allen: Well, yeah, I guess that was me, but look, that was a dark time for me. I did a lot of bad things to accomplish…

Smart: Can I have your autograph, please? Please?

Allen: I, uh, don’t think you want an autograph from a man like me, I…

Smart: Oh, pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease

Allen: Okay then!

Harry begins writing it down when suddenly Marc DuBois smacks Smart over the head with a chair. Harry drops to the floor and Harry is heated.

Allen: What the hell, you…

Marc: I’m glad you finally gave in to your past Harry. It’s a good look.

Allen: I didn’t give into anything, I wanna make up for my past, that hasn’t changed.

Marc: Well, by the looks of things, you were giving him a signature for all your past accomplishments, things you aren’t so happy about. Or at least, that is what you say.

Allen: I didn’t want to sign it DuBois, but Mark here, he asked me to. You know hitting a guy with a chair from behind is real disgusting.

Marc: You’d know huh?

Allen: Probably a little more than I’d like to admit, but that’s not me anymore. I’m on the straight and narrow.

Marc: Oh, Harry, People don’t change. You can pander to the insufferable idiots of this world all you want but I know the truth, you will forever be a bandit.

Allen: Mark may have been a little annoying but an insufferable idiot is a bit much.

Marc: People who are boring deserve to be treated as worms, but I’d never do that to you, you’re far too interesting. David Apollo too. He’s got skeletons in his closet, just like you, the only difference is I don’t know what his are.

Allen: You’re wrong. He’s got nothing to hide and hell, even if he did, it wouldn’t matter. People make mistakes DuBois but some people want to make up for the mistakes they did make. Unlike you.

Marc: My mistakes are what brought me here, if you don’t want to say the same about yours but that’s just fine. It’s frightening how naive you’ve gotten, Harry and to be honest, I can’t wait to see the look on your face when I expose him, it’s going to be… oh.. So.. sweet.

Rating: C-





Dharma Gregg is backstage and she runs into Haley Buck.

Gregg: Oh my god, Haley. How are you?

Buck: I’m just fine Dharma. No need to worry about me.

Gregg: I’m going to kill that Peter Gold. He didn’t even try to help you, why does he have to be such a loner all the time?

Buck: Don’t blame him Dharma. He’s made it clear from the start that he doesn’t have any interest in what happens to me, and that's fine. Last week could have been a lot worse, but I can handle myself, but I will admit, I had the power of surprise last week. Now, that’s gone. I got lucky, there’s no two ways about it.

Gregg: Aw, Haley.

The girls share a friendly hug as Jamie Atherton is seen in the background peeking around a corner.

Jamie: Sweet…

Jamie then walks over as the two friends stop their hug.

Jamie: Wanna make that a threeway?

Gregg rolls her eyes and Buck is disgusted.

Jamie: Come on, I’ll be gentle, not like that guy with you la…

[center]Buck unleashes a nasty punch right into Jamie’s face. Connecting with it just over the left eye. Jamie is distraught and looks to take revenge when we see the large figure of Peter Gold standing behind the girls as Buck stands strong in the foreground in front of Gregg. Jamie then walks away, knowing it’s not worth it and Peter slinks away before Buck or Gregg sees him.

Rating: D+



v
Joe Willis (E+) v Mark Smart (E+)

Turner: Harry Allen's out here, no doubt to protect these two guys.
Sneer: He's insufferable these days, isn't he?

With Harry Allen at ringside, presumably protecting the two from any possible attack, the two men in the ring engage in a fairly open exchange. Joe fires punches in quick succession as Mark returns with a flurry of strikes. Joe smartly takes down the quicker Mark with a waistlock takedown but Mark kips up and returns with a nasty shining wizard. This gives Mark the advantage but after a nice dodge by Joe he connects with a snap DDT. Both men are down and get up at the same time to exchange strikes again, but a missed punch by Mark is a lot worse than it first seems as Joe connects with a Russian leg sweep only for him to transition that into a Joe and Behold (Camel Clutch Cradle) and he gets the w.

Winner: Joe Willis
Rating: E+

After the match, Joe is backstage with Harry Allen. Joe is reading a comic book as Harry warms up for his match and drinks some water.

Joe: Um, Harry, can we talk?

Allen: Um, yeah, sure, whats up?

Joe: I just want to let you know that I appreciate you having my back over the last few weeks, I mean, I know it’s not easy and I’m a bit…

Allen: Look, Joe. There’s no need to thank me, I’m doing this for me, Joe. I…

Joe: But that's just it, Harry. You probably are doing this for you, and that’s great. We all make mistakes and you are making amends to that, I really admire that. I think we can be friends.

Allen: Joe, I don’t think…

Joe: Harry. You may think you can protect everyone and maybe you can, but who’s going to watch your back. You need a friend, Harry and I can be that friend.

Allen: I’m not going to weigh you down with my baggage, Joe. I appreciate the offer and I’m sure you could be a great friend, but I don’t deserve…

Joe: Harry, you deserve a friend too. I will have your back.

Joe then goes to hug Harry but Harry moves away.

Joe: Okay, no hugs but I will have your back, you can count on that.

Joe extends a hand and Harry looks at Joe and then shakes it.

Allen: Alright, Joe. Friends. I’ll have your back and you’ll have mine. An eye for an eye.

Joe smiles at his new friend as Harry has a stern look on his face, then smiles a little, before returning to a stern face again.

Rating: D+



vw/
Jamie Atherton (D-) v Peter Gold (D) w/ Haley Buck

It’s a pretty one sided match as Jamie really, really doesn’t want to engage with Peter. He’s probably right too. Peter takes Jamie’s head off with a lariat. From there, Jamie can’t do anything else, Peter seems to have a little more focus in this fight. Shoulder Block. Spinebuster. Lone Star Drop (Powerbomb) and that’s it

Winner: Peter Gold
Rating: D

Turner: Good god, he didn't have to murder the man.
Sneer: Told you, Pete's got nothing on his mind but the job at hand.

Gregg: Hey everybody, I’m Dharma Gregg and I’ve got Sid Stephens here. So, Sid, why are you such a jerk?

Stephens: Me? I could never be a jerk. I am the most trustworthy and honest person around.

Gregg: Oh, you are so full of sh..

Stephens: Dharma. There are kids watching. Now, I must say something.

Stephens look right into the camera, with his biggest puppy dog eyes.

Stephens: I want to tell Joe that I am so sorry. I didn’t know what came over me, I couldn’t control myself and if we could meet up and talk a bit, we can sort this out.

Gregg: Oh, come on. That won’t work.

Stephens: Never know until you try.

Stephens then slithers away.

Rating: D





Jolson is backstage walking around handing out leaflets about if they know anything about Buck’s attempted kidnapping they should contact him. Then suddenly, a large fist comes out of nowhere and punches Jolson right in the face.



Todd Havers then comes out, looking down at the fallen Jolson with a scowl, sporting a broken and bruised nose, much like Jolson

Rating: C-



&v&
David Apollo (D-) & Harry Allen (D) v Marc DuBois (C) & Sid Stephens (E+)

Allen and Apollo work a lot better but the cheating tactics of their opponents is difficult to keep on top of. That being said there are some nice sequences of teamwork by DuBois and Stephens as a Stephens atomic drop sets up a Marc DuBois perfectly for a superkick, but Apollo is able to power out of the pin. He begins with punches of godlike strength and DuBois has to run away as from Apollo, only for Stephens to grabs him, but Stephens misses the punch and hits DuBois. Apollo tags in Allen and they go to work, double suplex on DuBois, double clothesline on Stephens. Apollo hits the Mythical Driver (Draping Reverse DDT) on Stephens and throws him out of the ring. Allen goes over to DuBois a slight smirk comes across his face as DuBois is on his knees begging for mercy. Then DuBois points behind Allen and Allen turns to see a beaten and bloodied up Joe Willis tied to a chair backstage. Torn between helping Apollo win and helping his new friend, DuBois takes his chance and gets a Dubious DuBois Pin (Cheating Roll Up) and it gets them the underserved win.

Winner: Marc DuBois & Sid Stephens
Rating: C-

Show Rating: D+

[DAVEFAN95]

Talk about a crazy month, wanted this up quite awhile ago. Started writing this on Friday after having it in bullet point format for some time, but hey, it got here.

It irks me that I have to rely so much on Marc DuBois for ratings, he turned up drugged up tonight, while Texas Pete was drunk and drugged up, looks like they had a party. That's Gold's second infringement in two weeks, need to send him to rehab after this run is over. DuBois was happy with the punishment he received, a few more of those and DuBois is likely to stay clean, at shows at least.

I've been making a lot of The Room references lately, but I wrote that second show so long ago I can't even remember where that reference is, kinda bizarre.

Lotta guys getting some real good pop gains over the last few shows, having your own network will do that though. Need to make stars quickly if I want to stop relying on DuBois

Simply Awesome TV Predictions and Questions

David Apollo v Todd Havers

James Jolson v ???

Any thoughts about this diary?